Advice on getting money from former employer

We can get you MONEY [2008-12-04]
The injury lawyers always say that phrase and I hate it!

It's my money and I want it NOW! [2008-12-04]
x

I would not give her the money [2008-12-02]
I don't give out money anymore because I am still making the payments on what I have co-signed. It doesn't sound like she has anywhere else to turn to, I would talk to her more about why that is.

Is there way several family members can pitch in money for [2008-12-01]
xx

This is some advice I recently read [2008-12-01]
which would benefit me as well. In a nutshell: Worry only about the things you CAN change, not the things you CAN'T. You'll never change your sisters so let it all go. Change the way YOU handle your life and move forward.

2 problems with hubby - any advice??? [2008-11-30]
Problem #1: His hearing. He will not go to the doctor, complains to me all the time that he can not hear me and talks SO loud. I can't tell him anything in the stores or I might as well announce it over the loud speaker which in turn creates an argument (hence, miserable day out shopping yesterday). Problem #2:I dread this time of year with him. He turns into this greedy person that is beyond comprehension for me. Every time he opens his mouth it I always grew up being thankful for what I got and can I never ask for items for Christmas - I appreciate the thoughtfulness that a person puts into getting me something (even if it I also believe the kids come first (3, 2 of which are teenagers) and we buy for them first but it seems I always have to budget my money for the kids and then for him. He does not like inexpensive items either. The last few months I'm the only one who has bought gifts for the kids - he hasn't spent any of his money and is counting on a bonus from his employer that may or may not come through and you never know how much it's going to be. Sorry - and thanks for letting me vent. I've been so stressed lately.

Thank you to all for suggestions/advice [2008-11-26]
It It is so isolating working from home sometimes. I don Working from home is a mixed blessing sometimes... I do this so I can be available for my kids, but at the same time I feel I am always working and can On the days they don Iguess I thought it would be easieronce they got older, but it is just as complicated in many ways.Well, another day off from school is almost over and at least we all survived.

Of course they are...where's the money in [2008-11-23]
finding a cure for ANY ailment or disease? Wouldnthis country has, the numerous telethons, fund raisers, charitable contributions, endowments, etc, that one cure for one disease would be found? Healthcare is the one industry that will probably never face a downturn, let alone financial crisis. Baby boomers = ailments and disease, ailments and disease = money; any wonder drug dries all that money up. I sometimes type people who are on 10, 20, 30 medications...what a racket.

My mom has made money [2008-11-23]
My mom made some beautiful quilts. Some she did sell at fairs. Also the quilt guild I used to belong to made quilts to donate to unwed mothers and other organizations. My mom's guild used to donate quilts to cancer wards in a hospital and hospice organizations. If I had more time I would do something like that, but I haven't done any quilting in a long time. Never enough time to do anything.

Need some advice on an old friendship -- [2008-11-16]
I got divorced 7 years ago. Started out as a friendly divorce and then I started dating a man that my ex did not like (because he is black) and we quit speaking at all. Then, one of my very good friends started backing off from the friendship andI thought it was because I was openly dating a black man. Well, 4 months later, I heard that she was dating my exhusband. I called her and asked her about it and of course she denied it, could not believe I accused her of that, she would never do that to me..... on and onand on. To make a long story short, of course 2 months later I found out it was true, they had bee seeing each other for about 6 or 7 months. Anyway, during that time period after I knew that they were together but before they broke up, I would call her occasionally if I needed information on my son (who lived with his dad and would not speak to me at that time becaue of brainwashing) and we stayed friendly on the phone, felt like old times, etc. Then they broke up and now occasionally I get the urge to call her or she will call me for something, and it is like nothing ever happened. We laugh and cut up and it I have some thoughts though about when it really started, before we were even divorcing or during the divorce, and then sometimes I get really mad because she lied to me in the first place and let me keep trying to have a friendship, and then sometimes I miss her and think it does not matter because we were divorced and he was free and I definitely did not want him back. My problem is what to do? Forgive her and forget her... forgive her and be friends again... ask her the questions I need answers to and then decide whether to be friends??? And the other big problem is my new husband gets very upset every time I even speak to her because she did thatto me when she was my friend and he says you never go behind friends to their love interests. Advice please....

I think they are just sensationalists, atheists and out for money.....sm [2008-11-15]
Now this woman/man has BOTH sexual organs, supposedly, one grown through testosterone supplemts, how ridiculous. Who needs this crap? And Barbara Walters stirs the pot. Degrading. This 'Thomas' got death threats.

I need some advice [2008-11-15]
Ok this is the story: My husband is still friends with his first girlfriends family. This does not bother me. She did a couple of things to really disgrace her family when she was dating him but after a period of time he still kept in touch with them as we live in a very small community. When we met and got engaged they were all very kind to me and the mother even did the cake and flowers for our wedding. The ex is never around much so no big deal. Well this past weekend her great grandmother passed. My husband had known this woman for sometime and the mother asked him to come to the funeral and told me I was not to feel like I shouldnI. To which the ex rolled her eyes and looked at her HUSBAND. So we walked away. To tell you the truth, we didn't really care. Well we get a phone call about an hour ago from the exum we aren Well, knowing how immature the ex and her husband are, we knew they were behind this (plus we could hear them in the background). So my husband told the boy Look, it Well a few minutes later he gets a text message from the brother saying my mom can (which obviously is not true since we saw her Wednesday night and Thursday afternoon and she was obviously not mental). So my husband sent back a message saying Look, whatever issues your sister has with me and your mom having an ADULT friendship, she needs to take those up with your mom, but quit trying to start drama. Well a few minutes later the phone rings. My husband handed me the phone. Knowing how mad he was at the moment, I answered. It was the ex. She asked if she could talk to him, and I said No. This needs to stop right now, it She said well my mom is really going crazy and she can. She went on for about five minutes and I said fine, we won I'm just so angry right now! I mean this is high school drama! What would you do? I know the mom will be absolutely heartbroken if my husband and I just stop coming to see her and talking to her (since her lovely daughter never comes home). I mean except for the funeral, we never go around if she is going to be there, and we don't sit there and talk bad about her or anything. I honestly think she knows she screwed up by messing around on him SIX YEARS AGO and is just upset that he's married and happy and it sounds like her husband is a jerk.

my money's on your dog. Listen to [2008-11-13]
him. My old dog one time was growling so low I did not hear her,I felt it through the leash at a park. It was a really nice looking young man whom I would not have been suspicious of at all, but when I looked down at her, her fur was up and she was poised to attack, a typical german shepherd stance with one back leg crouched. She did not like him at all and was not even wasting her time barking. I had to hold up hand up to him and tell him to stop where he was. This was a first although I had seen her become very protective in the house, always slept between me and the door and she always tried to answer the door ahead of me. It turned out these were gypsy pavers staying in my sister's park and they were all nothing but trouble, even making the news in Chicago when one mistreated her child in the parking lot.

In the old days, they gave the carolers money [2008-11-02]
My ex-husband said that when he and his brothers were little boys, they'd go out carolling for money and make a killing. That was around 1962 or so.

Any advice for lice? - sm [2008-10-30]
My kids came home with this almost 2 months ago, got rid of them (I think---all 4 of us had them and 3 of us are clean now), but 2 weeks ago my older daughter had a new outbreak.I have treated 3-4 x with Rid and Nix (Nix the second time around per doctor), olive oil, and listerine/vinegar. Called the doctor again last night begging for the prescription (they don My daugher Now the doctor wants me to try 50:50 of mineral oil and vinegar.Icould not do it lastnight as I had already had her wash her hair after I found the 2 lice (did Nix again last night).I am so sick of these things. I have washed, and washed, and washed, vacuumed, etc. until I never want to wash or vacuum another thing in my life. My kids stuffed animals, etc. have been bagged up in the garage now for 8 weeks.....never undid them luckily....so at least I had a little less to do this time. ----the other thing that tics me off is the girl next to my daugher on the bus has them too, probably from mine but who knows, and the policy is that the child has to contain their hair for a week or two until the nurse declares her clean. This girl is not pulling her hair back in a ponytail because she does not like them. I complained to the nurse once, and am doing so again today. So that probably is not going to change soI had the bus driver move my daughter today from that seat....they sit 3 to a seat and they are mashed together, hence easy transfer of a bug crawling from one head to another.My daughter was not happy about it, but this other girls mother is convince they are cured asshe put listerine on her daughter If one time fixed it then lice would notbe such a problem. I really think this lady is in LA la land considering the trouble I am having, and I have combed, and combed too, so I am not doing the half-assssseeedddd either. So does anyone have anything that they swear by? I know I could make my kid go to bed with mayo on her head for 10 days straight and that would in theory eradicate them, or any smothering agent, and it may come to that, but if anyone has anything else, please feel freeto tell!

My only advice is [2008-10-29]
Go to the store (Staples or Office Depot or wherever) and try them out. Even some of the expensive ones are surprisingly UNcomfortable. Also, don't expect one to last forever. We spend way too much time sitting at our desks for that.

yeah well it's only wasting money when you lose [2008-10-22]
a deal when you could win millions. I can give up a few cups of coffee or something else rather than my lottery tickets!!

No way would that save me money -- [2008-10-21]
we'd end up divorced and that's more expensive than a haircut!! LOL!!!

Homeschoolers - advice please! [2008-10-21]
I am considering homeschooling my son. What are your pros and cons of homeschooling. Please also include how it affects your life and work. Are you more relaxed at your household because no pressure to get off to school, all homework done? I have talked to a few friends and would like some objective viewpoints. Thanks :)

I need advice. I think my16y son is smoking weed... [2008-10-17]
He downloaded some pictures on MY computer for his MySpace page. Anyway, there isa picture of a bag of weed(I was young once, I know what it looks like so he cant try to convince me it was oregano) and a picture of his friend holding the bag of weed.By the way, the bag was on my table so hecaneither. I really don A long time ago I found a pipe in his room. I honestly thought it was over with after that. (guess I can be niave). Between his dad, my husband and I we dealt with it in a mature and appropriate way.But I always stayed cautious after that so I was always watching. I hadn Haven Anyways, my problem is what to do now. I really do not want to tell his dad because hewill be soooo angry. See, dad was really p**sed the first time and told my son that if he ever finds out he I know that sounds harsh, but I know his dad, he will kick him out but only for a little while just to make him think.Tough Love, he calls it. I think he may have even threatened him with a beatin (That is just a scare tactic. He I thought that by me telling his dad the first time he'd know that I was serious and that he wouldn't be able to get away with it with me. See, my problem is that my son idolizes his dad. He I can almost feel his pain already.I feel like heI He knows it too. I hate it and I I know some of you are thinking well he should But remember when we were 16. We didnThat So I have understanding, I just can't let that interfere with tolerance. So what do I do? I haven I know one thing I have to do is forbid him from hanging out with this friend anymore. Which is another issue....Do I tell this boy A part of me wants doesnHeIt Oh, and I haven Heanything my son likes.He wouldnHe tends to overdo the punishments. Then there What if he sneaks out? What if he tries to be....what's the word???...um, like just rebel and walk out anyway or worse, what if he runs away? I know what a lot of you are probably thinking right now. I KNOW I I KNOW III hate it. I I really cannot help it. However, this is a very serious issue to me and I want to find the right thing to do. I doneither (but he doesnYet I don He has to learn. This is not acceptable. Not even to me. If I let it go who knows what the future will hold for him. So any reasonable suggestions out there that a doormat like myself can put to use? I really appreciate any help. I

My first advice would be [2008-10-16]
Take the dog to the pound. I'm not saying that to be cruel but even if you yourself can get the dog looking better chances are they cannot afford to keep it that way. If that is not an option then go to Wal-Mart and get flea shampoo/spray, some Sulfodene (for the itching) and some ear wax/mite remover. Some vitamins might not hurt either.

Thanks for the kind words and advice - sm [2008-10-15]
I think I will look into CCCS. A friend of mine used them 8 or so years ago, though she did not have to pay a monthly fee (asked her about this yesterday), but things are probably different now especially with so many people using them now. Luckily my DH is not on any of my cc accounts, though I am on one of his as a user, but that one will be paid off in full in about a month or less, once we get the money from the loan. We woke up yesterday to finding out my daughter had lice again so I think that distraction is actually helping things, he stayed home with her while I had to go out, had a school committment I could not get out of, and re-treated her (after I had already done Rid, he did olive oil as he could still see critters). So he got a taste of what I did 5 weeks earlier. So I was glad, kind of afraid to leave him home alone in case he ended up getting really depressed and doing something to hurt himself. Obviously he is not happy as a lark or anything but at least he is talking to me. Got the loan paperwork all filled out and mailing in today. Once his are taken care of he will be a bit more happy, though not about the loan, but it is really the only way as we don't want to do a home equity loan/line, and that would be a worse thing to do financially. Yes, I do feel a lot better though at his expense. At least he got up and went to work today, so that was good.

Some advice from experience [2008-10-15]
If you dongood daughter, all my other siblings quit speaking to my father years ago, I should have joined them! Good luck.

Any advice and/or experience with teeth whitening? [2008-10-11]
NM

need advice on what i can freeze [2008-10-10]
ie, casseroles, for a family (mom having cancer surgery) that freezes well. (i know beef does, but ) does tuna freeze well, ie tuna noodle casserole? Does green bean casserole w/soup do well? Would it matter if the beans were previously frozen? thanks.

I'd say it depends how long you have smoked - sm [2008-12-04]
and how old you are. A friend of mine quit and went about 8 months or so, is now back to a 3-4 cigs a day due to stress, brother died (accidental drug/alcohol OD--plus he had diabetes and hepatitis), then mom got lung cancer (was still smoking at 78, 50+ years smoker, 2 heart attacks), I don't know if she quit but she had stage IV so they knew she did not have long (3 months or so). My friend is still doing the 3-4 cigs a day though she felt so much better NOT smoking. Yes she gained some weight, but she had a 3 floor walk-up apartment so that helped her some. I am hoping she will quit for good here soon. Her stress level has dropped as she moved back in with her dad (though he is not the easiest person to live with)...he wants her to have the house when he dies which is probably soon....he was terribly affected by his son and wife's deaths. Smoking sucks, plain and simple. I am a nonsmoker. I hate the smell, cannot understand how anyone can deal with stinking all the time, having a smelly home, smelly clothes, car, etc. We just stayed in a hotel last weekend, a nonsmoking room....I smelled the cig smoke the second I walked in the door, wanted another room but it was fully booked. It was not too bad but still annoyed me that I had a room, that had a balcony, where someone smoked where they were not supposed to. Sorry, ranting. ---Unless you are over 55 or so and have smoked for 30+ years I would not worry about lung cancer. My DH quit before I met him, had smoked for 12 or so years, pack a day. He is in great shape, lung cancer in his family too. He has been smoke-free for 20 years now. His lungs get sore when around lots of smoke though, and he did have pneumonia really bad right before I met him that I think did some damage (he was seriously ill for 3 weeks) to his lungs as they are very sensitive now as I said. But other than that he is healthy as a horse. Quit. Set aside the money you save and take a nice vacation next summer. You will lose your chronic cough, smell tons better, get your taste buds back, get rid of that stain on your teeth and fingers, and once all the nicotine is gone add a few years BACK onto your life. Good luck!

I am too. I have tried moving to our [2008-12-04]
but the kids moved their computer by me. Seems whereever I go they follow. I had no big windows in there so I went back to the family room, which is now called the office. But it is more like the kids room with mommy trying to work and bothering them. They play classroom in here, webkinz, toontown, do homework, etc. I used to have it in the bedroom, for years, but got depressed because I literally never left the room except to take care of the kids and do chores. I got depressed and the doc said I had to take the computer out of my bedroom, because even when not working, in bed, I'd think about work or see it constantly. I once had an office with walls, but the kids took up camp in there too. They are all 11 and under so I can't wait until they want mommy less and are teenagers for example. Maybe then, they'd spend time by themselves and only come to me for money. LOL. I love them, but the noise and clutter that come withs them well just not exactly a good environment for a doc who speaks no English and eats chips at the same time.

You're not a hopeless case! sm [2008-12-04]
Each day is a new beginning. Donvictor not you can get some help there. You are the victim. You are worth the effort. Some pills do cause nightmares, try Benadryl at night. I thus the need to relax, I understand, please don't give up. If you don't have a PCP, try a walk-in clinic or the pharmacist, you never know, they may have some good advice. Think of the $$$ you will save, use it to pamper yourself and your self-image will improve. You can do it, baby steps at a time. Remember, every day is a new start.

I quit (I am still fairly young, so only smoked 8 years), but [2008-12-03]
I feel so much better. Even if someday I get lung cancer despite having quite, I am thankful to not wake up coughing every morning and to have clothes that don't stink and to be able to tell my kids not to smoke without being a hyprocrite. I can tell them why I quit. Mostly, I just feel better for the time being and that is enough. Plus, I save A LOT of money because cigarettes were darned expensive in Washington state.

Am I the Wicked Step-Mother? [2008-12-02]
I know I don't post here much but I do read and feel you are all friends. I offer prayers for those that request them and feel for those with troubles. I would like to know what you think about my latest dilemma. I came home from town today to find a phone call from my step-daughter, age 43. She has my cell phone number but for some reason she wonno this time and now I feel terrible. She started out by saying she had a medical bill to pay and then turned it around to a DUI fine that has to be paid by Jan. 1. She got picked up in August for a tail light out and had been drinking with co-workers. Her story. I was advised by the court not to help her so that was part of the reason I said no. She works two part-time waitressing jobs. She's divorced and no kids. She said she would pay me back $100 a month. If that is true why couldn't she have saved $100 a month and had the money to pay the fine? She called me a few weeks ago and I know she wanted money then but she didn't come right out and ask until today. Thanks for listening, I appreciate it.

I would not give her the money [2008-12-02]
I don't give out money anymore because I am still making the payments on what I have co-signed. It doesn't sound like she has anywhere else to turn to, I would talk to her more about why that is.

christmas gift exchange again sm [2008-12-02]
Our family has always picked names for Christmas and bought only for that person. The limit is supposed to be $25. You know how hard it is to just spend $25 especially on someone that basically has everything. In the past this had just included the adults in their 40s and 50s. Of course one felt obligated to buy the teenagers and younger children something. I Last year I spent close to $200 on Christmas. I really couldn This year my SIL presented the idea of a low cost gift or gift card (my mother hates gift cards) and playing the game of picking a number, then picking a gift, etc. Well my otherbrother and his wife, who are well off, and my mother decided they didn I told my mom I don I can Its only $25 they say. Arenmoney?Well its never just $25 and what can I buy a teenager that has everything for $25? They turned up their noses on the small gifts I gave them in the past.I also donspend more than $25 on me when I could only afford $25. I already feel inferior about my financial status in comparison to my siblings and I feel the best thing for me is to not participate. What I really loathe Christmas anymore. No one really appreciates any gifts they are given and I donI guess IWhy can Thanks for letting me vent.

Sorry to hear of your dilemma...... [2008-12-02]
that's a rough one to deal with. Wish I could offer you advice but you are in a tight spot. Hope your son is able to have his graduation on his special night!!

I had my own store. Got a following almost became [2008-12-02]
But the fees added up so much that is listing fees,final value fees, that I made about 33% after paypal took their fees too. Then, I shipped all over the world too so I'd be sure to make sure the shipping costs were right or I would get burned there. Then, there became the people who would want their money back even if the listing said only store credit. Customer is always right. So, by the time you count the money I spent on the item to begin with (usually something I thought I would naturally make money on), the fees, the time spent taking pictures, the digital battery, etc. I had a gigantic loss this year. Plus, if you buy on e bay, you should watch your selling, because you just might spend all your profit, which comes out to about 5 to 10 bucks an hour. I loved doing it, don't get me wrong. I met people from all over the world. I sold a dress to the Prime Minister of a University in England, and other interesting people. I still have friends on there who are sellers too. But, I had to close down shop because the fees just got to be too much for me. I would rather sit and type and have free time doing artistic things and having hobbies. Some of my friends who have a following on e bay and have been selling for years range in the 25K a year range, and they have a business license, and charge state tax. Don't forget as well, you have to pay income tax just like any other IC job. Just was not worth it to me. Good luck to you.

Things that are better NOW........ [2008-12-02]
Cell Phones: If I ATM Machines: I remember running out of gas on a weekend when the banks were closed back in the 70 The Internet:About 12 years ago, Iremember asking someone what the Internet was, and why we needed it. Now, I Remember the HARD way of doing things in the past? Like buying theater or plane tickets? Looking up directions? Comparing different brands of something you wanted to buy? Selling something you no longer wanted? Looking for a house or an apartment? Getting the latest news? The list is endless. Long Live The Internet!!!! Google: Who can live without it? Especially Google Earth Google Maps? Now I Back in the day when I had to rely on someone Digital Cameras: When I think of all the money I spent on film, and then developing said film, and all the film wasted on bad shots in my lifetime, it makes me cringe. I love the freedom and flexibility digital cameras give me to take as many photos as I want, and to experimentwith them,as well. MP3 Players/CD Players: Think of all the fights youin the car over which radio stationto listen to listen to, and how loud. Then think how they never would Dad could Solar Lights: I love solar lights! Garden lights! Floodlights! Christmas lights! You can fill your yard with them, and the power source is FREE!!! Hair-straightening and CurlingIrons: Remember the 60frizzy or too-curly hair with an IRON on your mom Or sleeping with HAIR CURLERS? UGH!!! You can probably think of a million more great things than I did. Let's hear 'em!

Left untreated [2008-12-01]
If nothing else, you would need to see your doctor to get a note for your employer. You would have to stay out of work for at least, the very least, a full week and it should be more. With mono, plenty of rest and staying away from other people is essential.

My family decided last year to just enjoy the holidays [2008-12-01]
We're all adults, no children, and live in small homes or apartments. I NEED tons of stuff, but have no place to put much of anything, and can't afford to reciprocate with a gift. Same with a couple other siblings. My mom's been impossible to buy gifts for, for probably the last 10 years. I was the first to bow out the year before last. I started the ball rolling because I just plain couldn't afford it anymore, and was too busy working all the time to spend hours on end in a department store. I had a new job, no PTO, and NO money, so I alerted everyone that I wasn't going to play the game that year. Turns out it was a relief to all! And last year, without all the holiday 'getting mauled at the mall' disasters, each of us had quiet, happy, stress-free holidays. So now that we've eliminated the gift-giving aspect of Christmas, I finally can look forward to the season and enjoy it again.

Oh, do I remember! [2008-12-01]
It was a big deal around Christmas time. We'd take the bus or train to a store in another town because they had a Christmas display made up of moving figures as big as a 3-yo child. People would come from miles around to see it. We hadtwo 5dimes in our town right aside of each other. One was modern, bright lights and big display windows complete with a lunch counter and all open displays. The other was dark with all wood shelves and bins, so cramped only2 people could fit in the aisles if they turned sideways. This store also had the candy in glass cases that you paid for by the pound. We also had another old general store like the older 5 dime but he even sold shoes. He had a pair of red shoes with bow ties on them in the window one year. I wanted them so bad because they matched a skirt I had at the time, but they were $10. I only got an allowance of $.50 a week. I was afraid it would take me forever to save the money. Our school's magazine sale was going on at the time and I worked hard to sell as many as I could to win the $10 prize. I won and bought the shoes. It was one of the happiest days in my life.

These 10 things definitely ain't right: [2008-12-01]
1) MTSOs who want people with top-notch skills and experience, but don't want to pay them what that skill is worth. 2) HMO's: So-called *health-maintenance-organizations* --yet they spend every minute and every dime of their far-too-large profits on denying healthcare, meds and procedures to their patients. These organizations have ruined American healthcare, and many American lives. HMO's have been a con-game since their inception. 3) The Bailouts: Giving money to companies who can too bad for the rest of you.* Then the Big Three show up in DC to beg for a handout, and fly there in private Lear jets. My answer to them would be, *I too bad for the rest of you.* 4) Apartment managers that won't allow even a single quiet, well-behaved pet, but will rent to people with continually screaming small children, and out-of-control older children and teens. Give me the pets for neighbors, ANY day. 5) Businesses that give an age-discount to absolutely everything that walks, runs or flies, but not to the middle-aged middle-class, who need it the most. Take the ski-industry: Young children ski for next-to-nothing, and sometimes nothing. There is a Teen Discount. There is a Student Discount for college kids. There I'll probably never be old enough - it's a carrot-on-a-stick, always just out of reach.) There are even corporate (UGH) discounts. But for those in my age group, who barely make ends meet but like to go up once a year for a couple days of bliss, there is NOTHING. 6) Travel-lodging deals that are always based on double or quadruple occupancy. What about singles? NOTHING. 7) TV commercials that are about a million decibels louder than the regular shows. Why can't it all be the same volume? Same with online newscasts. THEIR commercials will blow your eardrums out if you aren't quick enough turning down the volume before they start. 8) Surround-sound: Everything is too loud, already! Why do we need it coming at us from 4 directions? Why do people living in tiny apartments feel they need it? I've lost count of how many fights I've had with neighbors over this issue. Same with movies and music concerts. Why do they feel we need to feel the music in our SPLEENS? I went to Universal Amphitheater last week. (Now named something else). There is actually a sign outside warning that the decibel level inside might damage your hearing! (?!?!?!) Why do they need this? (To avoid lawsuits, obviously). If it's so loud you have to post a warning sign outside the entrance, then DUH.... it's TOO LOUD! 9) Banks that charge you a fee to use their ATM. They (I haven't actually been INSIDE a bank in YEARS).... and they want to charge US for using the machines instead of the tellers? Forget it. I won't give those banks my business. 10) The Post Office: Talk about rewarding slow, inept performance! The worse their employees are, the longer they seem to stay there. I'd rather have a root canal than go to a P.O. during the holiday season.

Yes, this post is very true...sm [2008-12-01]
She claims to love her cats but she can be very mean to them. She constantly screams and swears at them. I wouldn She was one of the select chosen and with her narcissistic personality, she will absolutely refuse togive up her weekend at the cabin because she has no one to feed her animals while she is gone. She would rather see them starve.

Unless things have changed [2008-11-30]
As far as I know, you have to have a converter box, if you don't have a HDTV TV. You can't use a DVD or VCR player for a converter. Maybe what they meant, is if you need a converter box, and don't have one, the only way you can watch your TV, is using a DVD or VCR player, playing the DVD discs, or VCR tapes. I have bought 5 converter boxes, ending up taking two back. First one I got was a Magnovox, and I didnt' like it. My antennas wouldn't fit it. I took it back and exchanged it for a RCA one. I couldn't get my money back, with the coupon, so, had to exchange it, and am stuck with the RCA one. It works OK. Not great. Then I reviewed and found the TiVax was recommended. I got it. I liked it, till I got a DVT Pal today. It is better than any of them i have tried. I traded a Zenith for it, didnt' like the Zenith. My antennas wouldn't fit it, either. So I took the Zenith back, got the DVT Pal. The Pal is the only one , so far, that I have gotten 4 stations. The others I have only gotten 2. With the ZEnith, I got none. I think I'll stay with the DVT Pal. I have one more coupon left.

I remember. [2008-11-30]
My parents used to take us downtown once a year to shop and look at the display windows. Then we would eat at one of the department stores. Dad would take half the kids and mom would take the other half so we could all buy for each other. I remember one year when I was about 6 I was with my dad and my sister and I saw this beautiful red coat I wanted to get mom. We took it up to the counter and my dad told us to give the lady our money. Between us we had 35 cents. We gave it to her and she wrapped it up for us. My dad still tells that story today, how we bought mom a coat for 35 cents. We never did see him give the saleslady the rest of the money, and it was sweet how she played along.

I still love giving gifts and have a solution with my family. sm [2008-11-30]
We all buy gifts for our parents (there are 4 of us, all married) but we wrap them all in the same paper and they are from everyone. That way, if someone is having a tough year, then it still looks even. Over the years, all of us have had a year that extra money just was not there during 1st babies, 1st homes, high gas prices, unexpected bills, lay-offs, new jobs etc. This way, our parents don't know who did what and they can't turn them down or worry about one family when they don't want to share with them their troubles. We treat the kids similarly. We all buy for all the kids (7 total) but no set limit. Some years, when having a good financial year, they get big presents, some years they don't. They all get to open at least 5 presents (counting Grandma and Grandpa) and we torture them until after dinner before they can open gifts! There have been years of Dollar Store gifts and years of video games. We all look for things during the year that we can give to all equally. Last year, I found pajama bottoms at Old Navy for $2 in the summer and bought a pair for everyone, including the adults. One year, my sister got them all Uno decks which were $3 each because that's all she could do and they are still the favorite gift and go everywhere. Uno tournaments, using all the cards are a family tradition and we make up different rules all the time! I am fortunate to be in a good position the last few yeas and have bought more extravagant presents. Not to show anyone up, but because I can. Not to make up for the very lean years, which were many, but because it is easy for me to do right now. We don't have jealousy and I don't expect anything in return because if I need something or want something, I usually buy it for myself. I just like to give gifts and can, and everyone is fine with that. But I have to tell you, my best gifts from the others are from years when there was no money and have now become tradition ... strawberry jam from my SIL, fudge from my brother. Christmas is what you make it. We are loud and loving and crazy and if we exchanged soup cans, the kids would still love it. It is what you make of it and how fun you make it for them.

This is what it is really all about.. [2008-11-30]
We all have a little bit of that Christmas excitement as well the true reason for the season even as adults. My Dad used to wrap things like Smiths Brothers cough drops, dominoes that he had lying around, peanuts, a bar of soap, an old deck of cards, a candy bar, and things like this... Well my SIL (my older brother Now granted my Mom would get things from Avon and give us as well, but these little things from my Dad would cause all of this giggling and laughing and thanks Dad; I really need these cough drops. He just got a kick out of it for sure and so did we. RIP: Mom and Dad (2006/1995,respectively). We miss those gifts!

Recommend puppy obedience classes. You can learn a lot sm [2008-11-30]
about discouraging bad behaviors. Some dog trainers give advice over the phone.

2 problems with hubby - any advice??? [2008-11-30]
Problem #1: His hearing. He will not go to the doctor, complains to me all the time that he can not hear me and talks SO loud. I can't tell him anything in the stores or I might as well announce it over the loud speaker which in turn creates an argument (hence, miserable day out shopping yesterday). Problem #2:I dread this time of year with him. He turns into this greedy person that is beyond comprehension for me. Every time he opens his mouth it I always grew up being thankful for what I got and can I never ask for items for Christmas - I appreciate the thoughtfulness that a person puts into getting me something (even if it I also believe the kids come first (3, 2 of which are teenagers) and we buy for them first but it seems I always have to budget my money for the kids and then for him. He does not like inexpensive items either. The last few months I'm the only one who has bought gifts for the kids - he hasn't spent any of his money and is counting on a bonus from his employer that may or may not come through and you never know how much it's going to be. Sorry - and thanks for letting me vent. I've been so stressed lately.

Men [2008-11-30]
I think his quality of life would go up if he'd be willing to see an audiologist and have his hearing evaluated. There are a lot of new technologies on the market these days. They will usually allow a person to take a device home for a trial before purchase. But it sounds like he doesn't want to admit his body is aging. He still wants to act like a kid and spend money on toys instead of health. My hubby is 50, and is just now realizing sometimes expensive electronics just aren't in a real-world budget. I haven't cared about gifts since I was a kid. I found gifts very disappointing and giving them a lot of work, so thank goodness we only buy for nieces and nephews now and all the adults go without. It had just become a silly exchange of gift cards anyway.

I just need to VENT and see what you all think...Beware...this is long...sm [2008-11-30]
I have tried twice to tell this story but deleted it both times because the story is just too long so I will be as short as I can. I have a bunch of ROTTEN TO THE CORE sisters.My sisters are just about the worst people I have ever met in my whole 43 years on this planet. There is one who is especially bad and I just told my other sister that if she ever dies, to please not call me as I won I come from a very large family with 5 sisters and 1 brother with my brother being the oldest. He is not involved. He sort ofleft the family years ago because he couldn They did terrible things to him after his divorce. We rarely see him now.I am considered a scumbag and a loser because my husband and I don We don We don We can We love our children with everything in our souls. They have made fun of me and my husband and insulted us to our faces.My husband and I have a difficult marriage as he is tough to get along with so they hate my husband My sistershave all gone out to dinner without inviting me. I have found out because of someone They have made threats and sent rumors flying throughout the family, without me knowing, about calling DCYF on me. I heard that one too from a slip of the tongue. I cried for 2 hours in the shower that day. They talk about everyone and I mean everyone badly. They have awell known reputation ina couple of our towns here for being mean horrible girls. They are about as fake and phony as a person can get. Sweet and all smiles to your face and when you turn around, they stick that knife in as far as they can get it in. They have what they have in their lives because of what someone has given them. My sister had her property given to her by her in-laws. It is worth about $1,000,000. My other sister had land given to her by her husbandto lessen their mortage burden so now they owe almost nothing on their $500,000 house. They think they are fabulous people. They think they are the cat In the past years when we were all talking and I would be invited to a holiday, I was not spoken to at all the whole time I was there. I am a venter and I always have been so if my husband and I are fighting, I will always go to my older sister (one up from me) and vent and vent until I can She gets on the phone the second I leave and tells every person in my family what is going on. They in turn judge me and my husband, make their threats, and so on. This is also happening to my oldest sister and her partner (she is in a gay relationship but was always dating a man and was married twice) and my sister The three of us, me, my sister and her partner, and my sister We get along well. We are happy with each other. We don Whatever happens in each other lives, we just accept it and don I now attend holidays at my sister I don I don The sisters (I like to call them the Witches of Eastwick) all attend holidays with each other up at my sister The three of us are not invited. My older sister has a son. Several yeas ago, my sister and her partner had a terrible fight with him. He went to the witches and told them a bunch of lies and now they have pretty much shunned her and her daughter and me too because we still talk to her.I have a sister, who is involved in all of this, that I speak to on a regular basis. She is close to my kids or at least my oldest son. She pretty much ignores my other two children and they tell me, It She is the one who has spread rumors about me in the family trying to get everyone to call DCYF on me. I heard this too by a slip of the tongue from another sister a few years back. I tend to be a forgiving person so I quietly forgave her for this without her ever knowing that I knew what she was trying to do. Now that they are all inviited to the holidays up to my sister They are extremely fat just like her. These holiday trips up north are usually kept quiet and I only know about it the day before they are leaving to go, which is when she inevitably asks me to come feed her f******g cats. This is how Iknow that a big party is going on up at the cabin and once again only the chosen selected few are going. This is usually for 3 or 4 days and they get fed twice a day so I have to goto her house twice a day. Sometimes I have to give them medication and the last time she asked me, I even had to soak her sick cat She lives about 20 minutes away from me. This girl would NEVER, NEVER, EVER do this for me. My husband and I took our children on a cruise 3 years ago and we have a cat and I never asked her to do this for me as I know she would have laughed in my face. I have been feeding her cats for years now when she goes away. Keep in mind though that she was in the select chosen few to be invited up to the cabin. I was not as I am considered trash in the family. I am SICK AND TIRED of feeding this girl My sister who invites everyone to go is a mean, horrible, sadistic, vicious, backstabbing wretched b***h. No one will say anything to her like, Gee Pat, where is everyone else? Didn They could care less. All they know is that THEY were invited. Anyway, I am sorry this is so long. I cananymore. I have been thinking of this all day all weekend long. I am really to the point where I just don I am goingto tell my fat a** b***h sister to fnd another way to get her cats fed because I She is just using me and believe me when I tell you, she enjoys it. She is verydiabolical. She loves it that I am not invited and she and her husband are.She even questions me and counts the cat food cans to make sure that I came on all of the days they were gone. These people have balls of brass and I have had ENOUGH.I am just sitting and waiting patiently for the next time she says, Oh, we Can you come and feed the cats? I just canNo. I can I will never feed your cats again! Find some other sucker to do it! I believe that they are severely narcissistic people and this is nothing to take lightly.These types of people are very destructive. Do any of you have family members like this and what do you do about them? How do you stop them from making you feelsad, lonely, excluded andless than you are or deserve? I think it is time for me to cut all ties with them. I just can

I feel exactly the same. I am very depressed and [2008-11-29]
anxious now about everything and don I have to find a way to tell my nieces, etc. that I am not buying gifts this year, but it is hard. My mom is elderly and ill and things are not right for it this year. Good luck to you.

Gift Giving [2008-11-29]
I just got married in July 2008, bought a new home, and am now expecting my third child in April 2009 so we ourselves have had many blessings this year but our financial situation is also pretty tight. We will not be buying gifts for anyone but our children. Our family will receive homemade treats this year. We still like to do something nice for them because they have done so much for us this year and every year but we don't have a lot of money to play with. In my case, we take care of our obligations (bills, our children, etc.) before we worry about gifts. We feel that providing our children with things that need and the love that they deserve is more important than any material gift will ever be. Our family understands our situation and is very happy just to spend the holidays with us without the expectation of a gift because honestly the quality time with family is the biggest gift we could give each other. In my opinion, you should just explain the situation to them and let them know that you will not be giving gifts this year. They may take it hard but they will get over it. You have to do what you have to do. Gifts aren't the real reason for the Christmas season anyhow. Good luck to you!