Have a friend who used her husband's sticker. He really was disabled and stayed at home (sm)

This happened to a friend of mine from high school........sm [2008-12-01]
He had mono after we graduated from high school and was off work for about 5 weeks. He went back to work too early and, while driving home from work one day, his spleen just burst and he crashed into an oncoming log truck, killing him instantly. It was really a double tragedy because the first people on the scene to find him were his mom and dad, who had a bad heart anyway. His dad suffered a major MI on the spot and had to be taken to the ER. His poor mom lost her son that day and almost lost her husband.

A friend's grandmother [2008-11-27]
A friend She had tubes and tubes of it stashed. Anytime you were going over there and called to ask if she needed anything, the answer was always the same - Polident. LOL, oh well, it was harmless, so who cared? Kind of cute. I hope when Ilosing it that at leastI

You know sometimes my husband doesn't want to go to my family things either... [2008-11-26]
and I have learned that if he doesn't want to go, don't be mad, just go without him...It is better to go alone then have to sit there with him while he is moping about being there. I understand your frustration and maybe your husband knows something will set him off and start a fight and he doesn't want to do that to you. Maybe he is really thinking of your feelings.

I would love to, but my husband is in Iraq :( [2008-11-25]
no message.

Maybe your husband........... sm [2008-11-25]
would agree to a temporary arrangement with new kitty staying on your enclosed back porch until you could find him a good home? I know I did that once. I brought home a poor kitten in the dead of a snowy winter until a good home could be found. He is still here with us 10 years later.

What do you do when your husband...sm [2008-11-25]
wont My parents got a divorce this year. My mom told my dad he could come and visit and eat and see us kids. Well my husband has said if he is going to come then I won I really want to spend thanksgiving with my husband but I can She has helped me too much. She does so much for me. More than anyone. So I am going. He said he don He also doesn So he won If my mother and us kids can tolerate my dad why can

I have an old friend--or ex-friend really... [2008-11-24]
I let something stupid, the details of which I really cannot even remember fully get in the way of our friendship and I miss her terribly. I realize now that it was stupid and that one little let down - or big let down, for that matter - is not bigger than all the times that she was there for me. I was selfish and stupid and not as understanding as I should have been of where her life was at that point in time. Sometimes, I think that taking the back burner is what we need to do to be good friends. I wish that I had been older and a little more understanding when this little (should have been little, anyway) fight happened. I might still have my friend.

Sure, but does it have to be with my husband? [2008-11-24]
LOL. Sorry. I couldn't resist.

Help with home hair coloring sm [2008-11-22]
Perhaps this will get their attention. With the price of salon treatments and especially around the holidays, we need some help here, so please read and comment if you could. Thank you. I miss my blonde highlights. When done correctly, makesme feel not so mousy brown - would love to know how to do this well without looking like a clown.

we're s'posed to believe this new guy is her husband? [2008-11-21]
i set the DVR, won is the season ending, getting all these new players? i hope they make it believable...

I have a friend who left her live-in ...sm [2008-11-21]
boyfriend of 11 years who she had a baby with because he was doing drugs and wasn't coming home at night, going to strip clubs after work and not coming home, etc. She lived in MS close to me and her parents and all of her family lived in Las Vegas, NV. She left and never looked back. She said it was the hardest thing she ever had to do but she doesn't regret it and is so much happier now.

I watched that one with my husband [2008-11-21]
We couldn't stop laughing the whole show!! Now THAT's entertainment!

I stay home!!! (I think I have social anxiety). nm [2008-11-20]
nm

My husband is oblivious to our finances [2008-11-20]
Sometimes that It sounds like maybe your husband is too proud to tell his family that he can I I would suggest talking to the leader of his family, the person who hosts the get-togethers, and let them know that you do the finances and you just don It doesn I would certainly let your husband know that you are going to say something beforehand, but he doesn I For birthdays, we take the time to call and wish that person a happy birthday. We don My brother lives about 2 hours away, so we don Unless his family is loaded, I'm sure they'll understand. As for the glasses, I just took my son for new glasses yesterday. The eye doctor said he needs a new prescription, but I asked if just the lenses could be replaced and the frames reused. He said absolutely. Our insurance covers new frames, lenses and the exam, but my son has a tendency to break things at the most inopportune time. We just bought him these glasses in June because he broke them and according to the insurance, it wasn Now that he is eligible for everything new, we asked for just the lenses. If he breaks his frames later in the year, we can just get new frames (covered by insurance) and pop the lenses in. The only problem there would be is they discontinue his frames because the new lenses probably wouldn So, something to consider here is, if your stepchild needs a new prescription and already has glasses, then I would check with your lawyer to see if you can just buy new lenses for the current frames. The frames are what normally cost the most anyway.

My husband can't say no to people either...sm [2008-11-20]
Unless he gets mad about something. We don't really work it out. I am usually just stuck as you say being the bad guy or give in. Find comfort in the fact that you aren't the only one who struggles with bills. I bought my son a Playstation 3 for X-mas this year for $400 but the only way I was able to do that was to put back money all year and hide it. It seems just typical man, most anyway, that you tell them and tell them but they don't pay you any mind or they don't want to hear it. Just sit him down and talk and tell him it isnno. Throw in some tears, which shouldn't be hard to do, for more effect. Maybe he will feel bad.

In Montana and just me and husband spend $400 a month..nm [2008-11-18]
nm

Mine does too. She will come home for [2008-11-18]
school and ask Is this whatever I can find for dinner night? She is 14 and has just started cooking, so she absolutely loves it.

I agree with your husband. [2008-11-16]
Women don't do that to each other. The ones that do aren't worth knowing.

I agree with your new husband (sm) [2008-11-16]
When she lied to you in the beginning, that said it all. Especially to go so far as to not be able to believe you would accuse her of something like that. I would have to cut my losses and count myself as having one less friend. She stopped being your friend the day she chose to secretly see your husband.

Any chance you could visit family or a friend... [2008-11-16]
for a few days when he leaves the dogs? Or simply tell DH that you will only take care of your guys? Let hubby experience what a job it is. I have a cat and a large black lab and those two alone can keep me pretty busy. Can I believe in karma, and you have a giant reward coming your way one of these days, as domany of you other kind-hearted posters.

Yep, RUN, she was never really a friend to start with. [2008-11-16]
A true friend doesn Dating a friend Sounds like your new husband has a good head on his shoulders. Hope it works out well for you.

Yep, RUN, she was never really a friend to start with. [2008-11-16]
A true friend doesn Dating a friend Sounds like your new husband has a good head on his shoulders. Hope it works out well for you.

I love the bumbper sticker idea!! nm [2008-11-13]
x

I had to place my mom in a nursing home [2008-11-09]
temporarily when she broke her hip the first time. It was very hard. (I had made a promise to her that I would never put her in one when she got older.) I visited her every day and every day she begged to come home. Shedidnand encourage her to keep up because the sooner she could walk with little assistance, the sooner she could come home. The PT team was great, too, always encouraging her, and she did her best. I found out that they had a hairdresser that came in every week and I paid to get her a haircut and style. After that, she kind of settled in a little bit, but still begged to come home. Thank heavens, she was only there2 months. I don't think I could have stood it much longer. Then when it was time to come home, she wanted to bring the furniture with her. LOL They had cherry dressers and headboards. It was almost like a regular bedroom. Momhe sat there for hours. No one came to see if he needed anything. The room was awful, so small andcheap furniture with old iron hospital beds. Reminded me of a regular hospital. Talked to his son and that's all the insurance company would cover for him so he was stuck. As the other poster said, research the homes as much as possible. Go when the activities and/or PT is taking place and just watch. Talk to the people that live there if possible. Talk to activity director, DON, etc. before deciding. Check the rooms. Watch to see if the CNAinsurance runs out; i.e., where the patients go after that. Mom would have been transferred to the first (MediCare) floor, but she came home before that.

nursing home decision [2008-11-09]
I am living this as we speak. My father died in March of 2007. My mother became bedridden in June 2007. I had hospice come in to assist, Home Health and Hospice to be exact, and they are wonderful. They actually have their own private nursing home-type facility in the next town over. With hospice, on an occasional basis and when a bed is available, they offer the caregiver a 5-day respite at their facility. After momma went for the first time she was offered a bed there and I immediately accepted. The facility is very small and only for the 3HC clientele, with only 12 private rooms divided into 2 sides - one side with 6 beds for the terminal clients and one side with 6 beds for residential clients. Momma was able to stay on the residential side for 7 months; however, her condition was stable and Medicare would no longer pay the fee. Momma came home after that and I have again been her primary caregiver since January of this year. She is contractured, bedridden, and rarely speaks or opens her eyes. I do have a sitter that works during the daytime hours M-F so that I can actually work, run errands when I need to, and get the kids to and from school because otherwise I cannot leave the house at all because momma cannot be left alone. I feel blessed to have found this line of work not quite 6 years ago. I have a 4-1/2 year old and a 6 year old and momma to care for so working from home has been a lifesaver. I, too, made the promise to momma that I would not put her in a nursing home and I will stand by that. Itcare most of the public places provide. It's a tough decision to make - even tougher if there aren't funds available like there are in our case (thanks to my great daddy) to pay for the sitter to come in and assist. But when the sitter isn't here, the kids and I must be. For the most part they understand, but sometimes they really just want to go somewhere or to the park or to McDonalds and we just can't do it. It's a huge personal sacrifice for your entire family to make to keep a parent at home. The decision isn't always just personal, though. It can be financial, too. You will make the right decision for whatever your situation is. Whatever you decide to do, just know that your parent respects you enough to make that decision for them and that they love you. Best of luck to you honey... hugzzzzz

Am I the Wicked Step-Mother? [2008-12-02]
I know I don't post here much but I do read and feel you are all friends. I offer prayers for those that request them and feel for those with troubles. I would like to know what you think about my latest dilemma. I came home from town today to find a phone call from my step-daughter, age 43. She has my cell phone number but for some reason she wonno this time and now I feel terrible. She started out by saying she had a medical bill to pay and then turned it around to a DUI fine that has to be paid by Jan. 1. She got picked up in August for a tail light out and had been drinking with co-workers. Her story. I was advised by the court not to help her so that was part of the reason I said no. She works two part-time waitressing jobs. She's divorced and no kids. She said she would pay me back $100 a month. If that is true why couldn't she have saved $100 a month and had the money to pay the fine? She called me a few weeks ago and I know she wanted money then but she didn't come right out and ask until today. Thanks for listening, I appreciate it.

Ethnic variety/languages. What's yours? [2008-12-02]
I'm just curious. I am a Germanic blend. The Scandinavians are actually one of the original Germanic tribes. I was born in Sweden, raised in Norway, had German Father and live in the US. I learned Swedish and Norwegian at the same time, English later and can fling a phrase or two in German. (Tho I read it better, if slowly, than I could ever speak it.) My preferred method of communication is actually what a friend refers to as Swenglish but is a weird mix of all my favorite languages. I consider myself a Scandinavian, but I am a Californian as well. This is my home now, even if I do sometimes pine for the fjords. (Gratuitous Monty Python reference, for you slow types!) I have actually met people who do not know where their ancestors hailed from! That is inconceivable to me! So, tell me about your family and language, please. I find this kind of thing interesting. Where are you from? Where did your ancestors come from? What language do you speak in the home growing up? What language do you speak now in your home? Like I said, just curious.

I have cleaned my house and now I have adjustment disorder sm [2008-12-02]
I have been working on my bathroom remodel since Memorial Day. It should have taken 4 weekends and I only just finished on Thanksgiving Day. I did 95% of myself, including cutting holes for and installing, 2 sinks in the vanity. I am pleased, it is gorgeous, but that is another story. Okay, I put my bedroom back together after 6 months of being a disheveled PIT. I am cleaning the house because my daughter will be home in a couple of weeks to get married at the JP in a nearby town. I still have to make her a dress too...but I wanted the house clean for she and her fiance/husband. It is coming along very well. My problem? I can't manage a house where I am not stepping over crap on the floor, shifting stuff around so I can get to my clothes or go to bed. This is all new to me, clean floor space and no dust, a place for everything and everything in its place...I can't cope. It is clean AND tidy, the antique linens are pressed and starched, on the surfaces. IT is lovely!!!! I am depressed now. I don't adjust well to change.

Advanced Directives ? [2008-12-02]
A friend and I were talking about Advanced Directives. Obviously, we both signed them long ago, but in a case where the doctor I told her I wasn We both realize that anytime a procedure or surgery is done we sign it again (don't we?!), but in a case where it's been a long time, it seemed like a good thing to know. Thanks!

This happened to a friend of mine from high school........sm [2008-12-01]
He had mono after we graduated from high school and was off work for about 5 weeks. He went back to work too early and, while driving home from work one day, his spleen just burst and he crashed into an oncoming log truck, killing him instantly. It was really a double tragedy because the first people on the scene to find him were his mom and dad, who had a bad heart anyway. His dad suffered a major MI on the spot and had to be taken to the ER. His poor mom lost her son that day and almost lost her husband.

crazier every day sm [2008-12-01]
Kids who need designer labels, theme birthday parties, karate, guitar, piano, dance, gym, swim,baseball, soccer all in one week, both parents have to work their kiesta off to pay for all this stuff and the kid has to go to therapy because they are acting tired in school and are always bored in the few minutes they do have at home. They also need food that is on the acceptable food pyramid from the expensive organic markets but end up eating Kraft mac cheese, the orange kind, that they slipped into the carriage when dad or gramma stopped at the store. Oh well, they used to say you have to eat a peck of dirt before you die - not in todayAnd PS - all that expensive cream we put on our faces (if we did) announced today on all stations that they don't WORK! Back to Vaseline!

I have something in my past [2008-12-01]
That I haven't told my husband and I don't plan on it. No one but me and one other person knows about it and the other person is long gone. It was something medical, and no it wasn't an unwanted pregnancy or anything like that. There's no need for him to know since I didn't know my husband back then and it doesn't have any bearing on anything in our relationship now.

About the coming change to all... [2008-11-30]
If there's anyone left on the planet (well, maybe it's just this country) who doesn't know this, and isn't sick and tired of hearing about it, seeing TV spots about it, etc. It's been going on for what, almost a year? It started before Feb 2008 because some got the idea THAT was when it was going to change, but it was 2009- over a year away. I haven Thinking it was some big news story, I read it, and I don't know if it's been saying this all along but, along with saying you won't get (or might NOT get) good or any TV when it changes, unless you get a converter box, it also says YOU CAN USE A VCR OR DVD (as a convertor)! Not a lot of people don't have a VCR or DVD player and if not, you can get a cheap one for $39.99 or so. So, you can hook up your antenna to the VCR or DVD player and that converts it to the digital the TV needs, and you also get the VCR and DVD player (if you don't already have one)? So, why haven't they said this before? Or, if they have it wasn't stressed. People can get coupons to buy a converter box, more wires and things to hook up, when they can use their VCR or DVD player (or buy a cheap one and watch tapes or DVDs or record, etc. on them, too)? Maybe I have this wrong, but I know it said you either MIGHT need a convertor box, OR a VCR or DVD player to get the digital signal (just not with your TV and anntenna) Just thought I'd pass this on, in case anyone who uses an antenna still hasn't gotten a converter box but might have a VCR or DVD player (or would rather buy one, instead)

agreed except for one thing [2008-11-30]
I hope the guilty are sitting at home realizing they should take responsibility for their actions and not worry about the video and I also hope that they have enough conscience to actually feel guillty and to realize just how immoral their actions are. unfortunately, it appears people just do not have a heart anymore.

LOL - that reminds me of the other day when [2008-11-30]
my 7 year old son came home from school. He asked me did I know that kids used to not speak unless spoken too. I told him what a wonderful concept that was that we've lost over the years. He just looked at me horrified. His expression was priceless! :)

Men [2008-11-30]
I think his quality of life would go up if he'd be willing to see an audiologist and have his hearing evaluated. There are a lot of new technologies on the market these days. They will usually allow a person to take a device home for a trial before purchase. But it sounds like he doesn't want to admit his body is aging. He still wants to act like a kid and spend money on toys instead of health. My hubby is 50, and is just now realizing sometimes expensive electronics just aren't in a real-world budget. I haven't cared about gifts since I was a kid. I found gifts very disappointing and giving them a lot of work, so thank goodness we only buy for nieces and nephews now and all the adults go without. It had just become a silly exchange of gift cards anyway.

Same problem here. [2008-11-30]
My husband works with loud machines and we both have noticed his hearing is going. I actually thinks he likes it because when I ask him to do something and it doesnI didn. Very frustrating for me. My husband also expects big presents for Christmas, birthday, etc, wrapped up all nice and pretty. Last year, he received a big gift and I received nothing from him. He says I'm hard to buy for so he won't do it. Or else on Christmas Eve, he will say he's going shopping what should he get me. He always takes the fun out of any gift-giving occasion. This year, I told him we are not exchanging and that means BOTH of us will do without. We'll see how he likes it.

The update on kitty - sm [2008-11-30]
I have been overthere at various times of the day and making sure I was there at the regular times I had seen him previously (sometimes 4 times in a single day!) and have not seen him again. I have waited in my car for him and gotten out to call *kitty.* I still have the carrier in my car and I am ready to bring him home. I have put out 2 cans of really yummy canned food over there for him, but they have gone untouched. I sure hope the little guy is okay. I will continue towatch outfor him!

Silly Girl shouldn't have to treat her [2008-11-30]
husband like a dog or a child. After all, she is his wife, not his mother. If she wants a pet, she can go to the animal shelter and get a dog. She married a man and he needs to act like one. It sounds like she gives and gives, and he takes. I think Silly Girl should start taking care of herself for a change.

Likening a spouse to a dog or horse... [2008-11-30]
imagine if a male doc suggested treating a wife like that; the outrage would be heard round the world. Maybe acting like adults and having a conversation like a married couple would help. How demeaning to treat a husband that way. Where do you women find these men that you have to train? Gesh, I always thought my DH was fabulous...now I am CERTAIN he is!

men [2008-11-30]
Me and my husband used to smoke...a lot, each over two packs a day. I got sick and quit, but I did not ask him to quit. He would blow smoke in my face and really kept hoping I would start up again, but I never did. He was really angry with me for quitting. Then his ego could not take it anymore and he quit. He figured if I could do it, how hard could it be? Believe me, he was humbled. Anyone who quits smoking is humbled. Cigarettes are tough to beat. He was really mean to me when he was quitting smoking too like it was my punishment. My point is that no one ever tells you that sometimes you have to stand up to the ones you love, maybe your kids or your husband, whoever. Sometimes people we love take us forgranted or bully us. Maybe we think that if they loved us they would not put us through that stuff. I think the truth is we are just supposed to stand up for ourselves period, even at home. Good Luck!

A lot of us have things in our past........ sm [2008-11-30]
that we are not proud of, and while we do not deliberately try to hide them, sometimes it is just easier not to talk about them as it is painful and very often misunderstood by those around us, even our spouses. It is not my business what this secret is that your husband has, but it sounds as if it is something that he has learned a lesson from and probably will not end up repeating in the future. My own personal opinion is that if this is not something that is threatening your marriage or your children right now, I would let the past stay in the past. In other words, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

family secrets [2008-11-30]
My mother blackmails my sister that she will tell her secrets to her new husband. If you love your husband, let it go and if you refuse to let it go, make sure you consider the source as more trustworthy than your husband before you bring it up.

I just need to VENT and see what you all think...Beware...this is long...sm [2008-11-30]
I have tried twice to tell this story but deleted it both times because the story is just too long so I will be as short as I can. I have a bunch of ROTTEN TO THE CORE sisters.My sisters are just about the worst people I have ever met in my whole 43 years on this planet. There is one who is especially bad and I just told my other sister that if she ever dies, to please not call me as I won I come from a very large family with 5 sisters and 1 brother with my brother being the oldest. He is not involved. He sort ofleft the family years ago because he couldn They did terrible things to him after his divorce. We rarely see him now.I am considered a scumbag and a loser because my husband and I don We don We don We can We love our children with everything in our souls. They have made fun of me and my husband and insulted us to our faces.My husband and I have a difficult marriage as he is tough to get along with so they hate my husband My sistershave all gone out to dinner without inviting me. I have found out because of someone They have made threats and sent rumors flying throughout the family, without me knowing, about calling DCYF on me. I heard that one too from a slip of the tongue. I cried for 2 hours in the shower that day. They talk about everyone and I mean everyone badly. They have awell known reputation ina couple of our towns here for being mean horrible girls. They are about as fake and phony as a person can get. Sweet and all smiles to your face and when you turn around, they stick that knife in as far as they can get it in. They have what they have in their lives because of what someone has given them. My sister had her property given to her by her in-laws. It is worth about $1,000,000. My other sister had land given to her by her husbandto lessen their mortage burden so now they owe almost nothing on their $500,000 house. They think they are fabulous people. They think they are the cat In the past years when we were all talking and I would be invited to a holiday, I was not spoken to at all the whole time I was there. I am a venter and I always have been so if my husband and I are fighting, I will always go to my older sister (one up from me) and vent and vent until I can She gets on the phone the second I leave and tells every person in my family what is going on. They in turn judge me and my husband, make their threats, and so on. This is also happening to my oldest sister and her partner (she is in a gay relationship but was always dating a man and was married twice) and my sister The three of us, me, my sister and her partner, and my sister We get along well. We are happy with each other. We don Whatever happens in each other lives, we just accept it and don I now attend holidays at my sister I don I don The sisters (I like to call them the Witches of Eastwick) all attend holidays with each other up at my sister The three of us are not invited. My older sister has a son. Several yeas ago, my sister and her partner had a terrible fight with him. He went to the witches and told them a bunch of lies and now they have pretty much shunned her and her daughter and me too because we still talk to her.I have a sister, who is involved in all of this, that I speak to on a regular basis. She is close to my kids or at least my oldest son. She pretty much ignores my other two children and they tell me, It She is the one who has spread rumors about me in the family trying to get everyone to call DCYF on me. I heard this too by a slip of the tongue from another sister a few years back. I tend to be a forgiving person so I quietly forgave her for this without her ever knowing that I knew what she was trying to do. Now that they are all inviited to the holidays up to my sister They are extremely fat just like her. These holiday trips up north are usually kept quiet and I only know about it the day before they are leaving to go, which is when she inevitably asks me to come feed her f******g cats. This is how Iknow that a big party is going on up at the cabin and once again only the chosen selected few are going. This is usually for 3 or 4 days and they get fed twice a day so I have to goto her house twice a day. Sometimes I have to give them medication and the last time she asked me, I even had to soak her sick cat She lives about 20 minutes away from me. This girl would NEVER, NEVER, EVER do this for me. My husband and I took our children on a cruise 3 years ago and we have a cat and I never asked her to do this for me as I know she would have laughed in my face. I have been feeding her cats for years now when she goes away. Keep in mind though that she was in the select chosen few to be invited up to the cabin. I was not as I am considered trash in the family. I am SICK AND TIRED of feeding this girl My sister who invites everyone to go is a mean, horrible, sadistic, vicious, backstabbing wretched b***h. No one will say anything to her like, Gee Pat, where is everyone else? Didn They could care less. All they know is that THEY were invited. Anyway, I am sorry this is so long. I cananymore. I have been thinking of this all day all weekend long. I am really to the point where I just don I am goingto tell my fat a** b***h sister to fnd another way to get her cats fed because I She is just using me and believe me when I tell you, she enjoys it. She is verydiabolical. She loves it that I am not invited and she and her husband are.She even questions me and counts the cat food cans to make sure that I came on all of the days they were gone. These people have balls of brass and I have had ENOUGH.I am just sitting and waiting patiently for the next time she says, Oh, we Can you come and feed the cats? I just canNo. I can I will never feed your cats again! Find some other sucker to do it! I believe that they are severely narcissistic people and this is nothing to take lightly.These types of people are very destructive. Do any of you have family members like this and what do you do about them? How do you stop them from making you feelsad, lonely, excluded andless than you are or deserve? I think it is time for me to cut all ties with them. I just can

Gift Giving [2008-11-29]
I just got married in July 2008, bought a new home, and am now expecting my third child in April 2009 so we ourselves have had many blessings this year but our financial situation is also pretty tight. We will not be buying gifts for anyone but our children. Our family will receive homemade treats this year. We still like to do something nice for them because they have done so much for us this year and every year but we don't have a lot of money to play with. In my case, we take care of our obligations (bills, our children, etc.) before we worry about gifts. We feel that providing our children with things that need and the love that they deserve is more important than any material gift will ever be. Our family understands our situation and is very happy just to spend the holidays with us without the expectation of a gift because honestly the quality time with family is the biggest gift we could give each other. In my opinion, you should just explain the situation to them and let them know that you will not be giving gifts this year. They may take it hard but they will get over it. You have to do what you have to do. Gifts aren't the real reason for the Christmas season anyhow. Good luck to you!

we don't exchange gifts either [2008-11-29]
We stopped exchanging gifts about 30 years ago. When my husband and I first approached the subject, we met with some resistance, but we stood our ground and said we would not be buying gifts. My husband is the oldest in a family of 7. By the time they all married and had children, the number could have been quite staggering to buy for. I was a surprise baby, my sisters being greater than 11 years older than I am, so when they began their families I was too young to buy anything to buy for them and so never started doing so. Now both of our families agree the holidays are much more enjoyable without the stress of the gift buying, worrying about what to get, how much, will the like it, can I afford it, etc., etc. The true gift of Christmas is the love we feel for our families and all we ask is time with them, and everyone agrees on this. We usually bake or take small treats to the families are who have misfortune of spending Christmas at the Ronald McDonald House in our city due to the illness of a child. Often the other kids in the family (the healthy ones) get lost in the shuffle of caring for a child with cancer. There is no gift one can give as great as giving and bringing joy to a family in such a situation. Anyway, my point is that there may be others in the family who will feel the same way, that it is just too stressful, and you may find that they will appreciate the holidays much more if the gift stress is taken out of the equation. I should add here, I do buy something for my own children but usually one or two things and my grandchildren because, after all, Santa still comes (!) and I do think Christmas gift giving is for children. Watching my little ones open is a gift a truly a fun thing to do and makes me happy. I do ask my kids not to buy for me or my husband because they have young families and can't afford the extra money. I have always told them I would rather they spend time with me any day then go out and buy a gift.

You are too funny! Here are my answers: [2008-11-29]
1. We went to Academy Sports. 2. We got there about 1:00pm. 3. I bought 2 pairs of work-out shorts for 2.44 each and a soccer shirt for my son - also 2.44. :) I got my big ticket item back in October (a Wii I happened upon by accident) so I slept in (until 7:30) and then when DH got home from deer woods, we went out for pizza and beer and then went to Academy before venturing back home to read and watch movies.

Has society become this bad and why [2008-11-29]
I saw the post down below about the Wal-Mart worker. Here is a new article that just came out (link below). The police are now looking at video surveillance to see who trampled this poor worker to death. Personally I hope they find all responsible and prosecute them to the fullest. It doesn I like their store just fine, it is what society is doing to people that nobody even bothered to stop and help this person. I grew up in the 60s/70s in a small town in New England. Maybe I'm old fashioned but my parents/grandparents taught me better than this. I just can And for what? Getting a Christimas item? This is one of many reasons why I do my Christmas shopping (what very little I do) online and gift cards. I think the traditions of the big shopping day the day after Thanksgiving should go away. I really donlove thy neighbor, not trample, bite, and spit at them so you can grab that item. (BTW - you can shop online at Walmart too). I think to myself that I thought the spirit of Christmas was supposed to celebrate Christ. Oh yeah, I'm sure he is so proud of people like those who harm others and cause death so they can get what they want. I hope those guilty are sitting at home worrying about whether or not their face is going to show up on the video camera. http://apnews.myway.com/article/20081129/D94OJ4NG0.html

you sound like me - [2008-11-29]
for the past couple of years, I have said, let's forget the gifts and just spend the day together at my mom's house -- but oh no, that would be horrible if we did not buy presents. This year, my sister's husband lost his job and now it's automatic, we are not going to be buying gifts. I always wonder, why is it that one person in the family always seems to make the decisions for everybody else?

LOL It went well. Thank you to everyone for helping! [2008-11-28]
I felt bad because none of the friends or extended family that she invited showed up. They all called to cancel. We did not have leftover Turkey but plenty of desert and rolls. She bought 45 dinner rolls?! I think some of you are right that this is the beginning of sundowning for them. I will have to explain this to my husband because he just thinks they are losing their minds. I heard from another family member that MIL has a stash of a case candy bars in her closet and yesterday she went in the bedroom for cookie sheets to put the biscuits on. A little odd, especially being that they have extra storage area in the basement. I think FIL took it as it was just that much less food that cost him money because he was so happy that I brought as much food as I did and kept saying how much he loved the veggie tray, etc. I think MIL was a little miffed when I got there because she didnstay the heck out of my kitchen and keep your opinion to your self and afterwards he gets the look of You have always been my favorite child, thank you LOL But I understand things are different with moms and their own kids versus the spouse, especially with females. So overall it turned out well and everyone had plenty to eat. We didn't have to run out for burgers or home for dinner.