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I have a friend who left her live-in ...sm [2008-11-21]
boyfriend of 11 years who she had a baby with because he was doing drugs and wasn't coming home at night, going to strip clubs after work and not coming home, etc. She lived in MS close to me and her parents and all of her family lived in Las Vegas, NV. She left and never looked back. She said it was the hardest thing she ever had to do but she doesn't regret it and is so much happier now.
I'm sure Mary Jo Kopechne's family is not as happy as you. nm [2008-11-17]
x
Any chance you could visit family or a friend... [2008-11-16]
for a few days when he leaves the dogs? Or simply tell DH that you will only take care of your guys? Let hubby experience what a job it is. I have a cat and a large black lab and those two alone can keep me pretty busy. Can I believe in karma, and you have a giant reward coming your way one of these days, as domany of you other kind-hearted posters.
Yep, RUN, she was never really a friend to start with. [2008-11-16]
A true friend doesn Dating a friend Sounds like your new husband has a good head on his shoulders. Hope it works out well for you.
Yep, RUN, she was never really a friend to start with. [2008-11-16]
A true friend doesn Dating a friend Sounds like your new husband has a good head on his shoulders. Hope it works out well for you.
Happy Friday everyone, how's it going? ,,,,nm :-) [2008-11-07]
bn
Yes. Sometimes I tell my best friend and maybe family [2008-11-03]
about the support that someone gave me, or just a laugh to two. They think it is good that there isa place where we can get ideas, share things, etc.
Soooo happy! sm [2008-10-30]
As the Tacoma newspaper headline read, Phinally! Wish I could skip work andgo to the parade...just like when I skipped school in 1980 for that parade.
hubby just called our 5 year old a dumba__ [2008-10-27]
He was in the living room making a fire and my son kept touching things he told him not to and i heard him say, I said quit touching the wood, dumb__ I came out of the bedroom stomping down the hall and took my son back here with me. I am in tears, I can't believe he would call him that!!!! am i over reacting??
And start taking 1/2 hour walk every [2008-10-24]
day and build on it -- adding another 1/2 hour walk or making it 1 hour. Do something for youself every day. Get up, get showered and fix your hair before starting your job. You
I actually got this idea from a friend. She said s/i [2008-10-23]
this year her family was fighting and she said she was just going to make dinner, tell them what day and time and whoever shows up shows up. I just did the same, I emailed my brother and my mom and told them the deal. If they don't like it they can stay home and I will invite my aunt. If she doesn't like it I will invite my grandma. I will feed somebody!! LOL
I always thought it was more fun to enjoy the things you can't really do any other time of the year, like drink coco or eggnog by the fireplace or toast marshmallows inside!
Called the doctor's office [2008-10-21]
and they suggested this too. Also said to try Gatorade. Any idea how to make tonic water taste better? It is nasty stuff! I will suck it down but ick!
I would be happy with 6 hours a day...sm [2008-10-13]
Be glad you have work which I am sure you are. I know I need to look for another job. But it isn't easy in these times.
Happy Halloween [2008-10-12]
Here is our baby girl (CJs mom)... since the costume had wings she tried it out to see if she could fly LOL
Hubby called - didn't get one but his friend did [2008-10-12]
They are going out again next weekend. I know what you mean about the jerky - I love it!! In fact, we are hoping he gets a deer because we were going to make jerky for Christmas gifts!
Happy Halloween [2008-10-11]
I am dressed up as a skeleton, but sadly alot of pitbulls out there are skin bones w/o dressing up abused by their owners, neglected. We pray for all of the pitbull breed. We also pray that people will come to love understand this wonderful breed of dogs. For those who hate us out of their own ignorance and lack of understanding, we pray for you.
Did her friend just "happen" to look in [2008-10-07]
the freezer? Wierd - just not a common place to be looking for your friend..??
Close friend has dog which is half pitbull. She is very gentle, but [2008-10-04]
nm
On occasion. I have a friend who owns [2008-10-03]
a small plane. When he goes up, I tag along and split the fuel costs. Flying about once a month for several hours on the weekend.
Love it. Would love to move on with ground school but can't really afford it right now and would need to work part-time to study well enough.
Feel fortunate to have achieved this years ago, though. Did it when I was young and had young children and had no idea what words such as 'no' or 'can't' meant. LOL
I've read that they're happy to just lie around all day, but [2008-09-29]
if they get out, they could take off and sometimes see little pets as prey. I have neighbors who have little dogs and wouldn't want to risk having a dog that would eat their dogs.
no, happy mt, they all come HERE and do that. (nm) [2008-09-27]
Is this not the dump board to them??
My kids got me one for by birthday years [2008-09-26]
ago. Absolutely love it and they make their milkshakes with it, no mess at all.
Happy Birthday! I'll be there in the spring. nm [2008-09-24]
x
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. Hope it is a good one. nm [2008-09-23]
nm
Happy B-day to you ! [2008-09-23]
Be grateful you made it this far when so many others have not. Appreciate each day and live life to the fullest!
OK, I rolled mine over into AARP [2008-11-22]
in January. I made $850 the first quarter and now I have lost $1500 for the year. They put everything in the most conservative things they had because of my age. My friend, however, has lost 50+% of hers this year.
Everyone seems [2008-11-22]
pretty happy. It doesn't seem prurient. I've been in favor of other situations in which people are free to develop on an internal time clock rather than one imposed externally & in that regard there's probably something to this, but the siblings following the first probably got the idea to continue for a long time from watching, so there's definitely a bias there.
Would be interesting for someone to design a study comparing long-time thumb-suckers with children weaned at a later age. This woman would probably say that the experience of breastfeeding can't be duplicated or substituted with a bottle or a plastic nipple because the emotional part of it would be lost. I don't know. I guess it depends on the family involved. I remember on Six Feet Under, how Lisa & Nate were letting Maya sleep in their bed until she decided she didn't want to any more. I think there's just a whole movement out there comprised of people with similar ideas, & until someone does a long-term study, I guess I'd have to say any suggestion that it's out-&-out wrong is just conjecture or has a cultural bias.
Boobage - SM [2008-11-21]
I feel ya, girlfriend...I wear a 32DD and the choices are so limited. Believe it or not, ICurvation. I bought a couple of them when they were on sale because they were really cute (black with pink ribbon trim and leopard print demi-cup with pink ribbon trim), but didn't really expect much from them and figured they'd just look nice.
Imagine my surprise when not only did they look great, they actually provided support, lol!!! I found that the demi-cup is actually even MORE supportive than the full cup style, which I hadn't expected.
Have fun and show those girls off to full advantage :-)
Help is a safety net you have paid for sm [2008-11-21]
Food stamps are a safety net we all pay for, all forms of public assistance are things we have been paying for all along. TAKE the help you need! Do move closer to family if you possibly can.
I have been in your shoes myself. I lost my home to foreclosure 4 years ago because of having a near-fatal drug interaction and losing my job of nearly 7 years. I made a couple of moves and finally ended up in a small town out of state from where I had lived for 30 years. I lived with a close friend for about 9 months and had the opportunity to buy a mobile home for $3000. The people I bought it from said I could make payments and I was able to pay it off in 5 months. It needed a lot of work and it has gotten it, most of which I have done myself. This project really helped me to regain parts of myself I had lost. It gave me a reason to get up and get going on my days off. I turned this ugly old thing into a lovely, comfortable home I cherish. I have lost about 50-60 lbs since living here and I have brought the idea of vastly cutting expenses in line with making more money. The end result is that I am very well off financially, better than in my entire life.
DO get medication to help you if you can. I didn't have medication to help because I am allergic to every psychotropic in existence. I did this by pulling myself up by the boot straps, but if I could have had help, I would have. There IS a brighter future out there. You CAN have that brighter future because you DESERVE IT. That said, no one expects you to get there alone!!!
Don't be embarrassed to ask and receive help. You will be able to help others later. Years ago, when my kids were young, I was a single parent, no support and it was Christmas time. My kids didn't even have adequate clothing or food. A neighbor I hardly knew handed me a Christmas card. Inside was a $100 gift card to K-Mart. She said that many years before that, she had been in my shoes and someone had given her $100 one Christmas, she was now paying this forward to me. The only provision was that I return this favor when I could, and that I bought something for myself too because I deserve nice things for my hard work. It was a turning point for me. I have been more of a giver since. Although I could have paid this back last year, I didn't know anyone who would appropriately benefit. This year, I do and I had to tell her that I was going to do this and why. She cried and felt embarrassed because, she said, she was usually in the position to give and it hurt a little to receive. I reminded her that she was GIVING me the gift of giving with pleasure.
Others are going to give to you with pleasure, love, friendship and concern for your well being. TAKE IT. One day you'll post back here about how good things are and I'll want to hear it.
I'm a virgin, help a first timer out .. [2008-11-21]
BLACK FRIDAY Shopper's!!!!
Ive NEVER in my life shopped on Black Friday, it used to be of no interest, then it got interesting for awhile, but DH hated the idea and I dont shop without him unless I absolutely have to and/or dying to get out, and now the interest is back with DH on my side! So I am excited, or should I be frightened, is it a true mad house?
I need some tips and info. Do you have any tips for a 1st Timer??
What time do you get at the store? Do you have to get a coupon or something to be allowed IN? If so, where do you get these coupons?
What time do stores typically open? What times do they take the sale prices down, is it usually an all day thing, or an end at lunch type of thing?
And most important of all. I am a fan of the old fashioned way..... newspaper ads to see who has what deal. Where do you get this? Does it come out THIS Weekend or on Thanksgiving Day??
Thanks so much!!!!
You might try posting [2008-11-21]
On the main board about this. If find that I get more help about equipment and IT issues over there.
I would say find a used computer store. Some times they only charge $50 an hour to look at it for you and if they can fix it in that hour there are no additional charges. I would definitely work on it before it goes out completely on you.
Whatever sale item is most important to you [2008-11-21]
start there...early. Sale ads from Wednesday night's or Thursday morning's newspapers should tell you the store hours and sale hours. Many end at 11am. My dd and I like to go about an hour after stores open, though it's still dark outside. The crowds that were waiting in line overnight for the big ticket items are gone by then, and most everyone else avoids the stores until the afternoon hours, thinking they will be less crowded. Wrong they are though. There are more employees on duty early rather than later, so things move more quickly in the morning hours. We've also found the earlier crowds to be friendlier. DD starts singing Christmas carols while standing in line and soon lots of others join in. She's a blast to shop with. Then we go to a late breakfast and go home before the unfriendly crowds show up. Hope your experience is an enjoyable one.
How exciting for you -- sm [2008-11-21]
I My mom always drug me out an hour before the stores opened.
The ads usually come out in Thursday In the past, I Get the paper and makea game plan. Some stores open an hour or 2 later than others, so you may be able to get to both in time for the specials you Wal-Mart generally has a lot of specials, especially in the toys dept. Our Wal-Mart gives you a map when you enter to tell you where each BF special is located in the store. They put some stuff in strange places -- like TVs in the meat dept, computers in dairy, etc. It Ask the Wal-Mart greeter when you enter. Our Wal-Mart is also open 24 hours, as are most, which means no waiting outside. We usually arrive an hour before the sales start so we can be in position for the item. Obviously, the most-sought after items are electronics, so be there early if you
Target is 1 of my favorite places because their specials run all weekend, not just until 11 a.m. (I hope it They usually open an hour after Wal-Mart. I usually head there second because even though the specials run all weekend, they do run out of stock.
Kohl The cash can be redeemed usually starting the Sunday after Black Friday.
Don If there
General advise: Wear comfortable shoes. Be polite to others, but don If you got there first, it Make sure you and DH have cell phones so you can communicate if you get separated. Most importantly, HAVE FUN!!!!
Let us know how you make out afterwards.
I love the Ghost Whisperer! (sm) [2008-11-21]
It starts here in a half-hour ~ can't wait to watch it!
Yuck on the blizzard. I used to live in MN and had my fair share of driving in that crap. Stay warm! :)
He is 60 years old...sm [2008-11-21]
And acts like he is 2. He doesnI am not his babysitter. He is a grown man and he needs to act like it. Social service doesn't need to help him. The man makes decent money. He just won't take responsibity to pay his bills and has too many at that. He needs to thin them out. For instance, he has 2 new model trucks. He does not need 2 trucks but he WANTS both of them. But a light bill is one of your most important bills. And I for a fact know he had the money to pay it and didn't. I even told him you better go pay that electric bill. He wouldn't. I have never seen anyone who was quite like him. I love my dad and don't want to hurt him but he is making things very hard for me right now. I can't babysit him anymore. He is more than welcome to come visit me as often as he wants. He can come by everyday if he wants. But then there is a time to leave and go home. I have a family and I know I wouldnt like it if my husbands dad did this. I would not be happy at all. I am not happy about my father doing it but what do you do? Tell him get out?
Do any of you have a spouse [2008-11-20]
who can How do you work it out? Are you just stuck always being the bad guy?
Unfortunately, the entire United States is having a difficult financial time. It is obviously not just our household. We have cut back everywhere we can, and I mean everywhere. Our families are having difficult problems as well. We also have an ex-spouse and have had unexpected increases in child support, etc. recently along with unexpected additional expenses where this is concerned. Basically, the child needs new glasses, etc. even though the child really doesn It just seems like it is one thing after another and I know it is for everyone, although the circumstances may be slightly different.
My problem is that I have been telling my husband for months that this was coming, along with Christmas, birthday, etc. He hasn Although we have cut back on many things, on my initiative, it just has not sunk in for him until now...when everything finalized and we dont To top this off, he can Ibad guy because he is ok with all of it although he admits he has no idea where the money is going to come from. I have been upfront with my family and when people ask me but is it too much to ask that he do the same? I dont But of course he wants to constantly remind me (the cheap skate and tight-a$$) to cut back on groceries, etc. which I cannot possibly do any more than I have already. We have nothing left in savings. We have no Christmas fund.
I I donI told you so but I did tell him and he had no concerns until now...when we are seemingly headed towards financial trouble. I have been working OT but his OT has been cut indefinitely from his employer. I I must say he doesn't buy things for himself..its just the piddling away of $20 here and $20 there on top of our already mounting unexpected expenses.
Haven't done it for years . . . sm [2008-11-20]
but this year my 14-year-old daughter and her friend and mother are all going to try it again with me. I am looking forward to it, because I think it will be a lot of fun for me and my daughter! We don't go out too seriously, though, just for fun!!! I used to like to bag the bargains when the kids were little, but nowadays the bargains never match my list!!!
My husband is oblivious to our finances [2008-11-20]
Sometimes that It sounds like maybe your husband is too proud to tell his family that he can I I would suggest talking to the leader of his family, the person who hosts the get-togethers, and let them know that you do the finances and you just don It doesn I would certainly let your husband know that you are going to say something beforehand, but he doesn
I For birthdays, we take the time to call and wish that person a happy birthday. We don My brother lives about 2 hours away, so we don Unless his family is loaded, I'm sure they'll understand.
As for the glasses, I just took my son for new glasses yesterday. The eye doctor said he needs a new prescription, but I asked if just the lenses could be replaced and the frames reused. He said absolutely. Our insurance covers new frames, lenses and the exam, but my son has a tendency to break things at the most inopportune time. We just bought him these glasses in June because he broke them and according to the insurance, it wasn Now that he is eligible for everything new, we asked for just the lenses. If he breaks his frames later in the year, we can just get new frames (covered by insurance) and pop the lenses in. The only problem there would be is they discontinue his frames because the new lenses probably wouldn So, something to consider here is, if your stepchild needs a new prescription and already has glasses, then I would check with your lawyer to see if you can just buy new lenses for the current frames. The frames are what normally cost the most anyway.
I don't think I understand [2008-11-20]
so just let him do whatever, support his decisions, and hope for the best?
He has a good job it is just that so much of it is eaten by the attorneys, support, transportation, and crazy things the ex dreams up that the child must have and we are told we just have to pay it. It costs more than what I make to cover the mandatory expenses of my step-child.
I gave up our finances about a year ago to give him a taste of what it was like. Stupidly thinking this would help. Obviously it hasn't but has made things worse. I always reassure him and tell him we will get through it, etc. but when he asks me to make a decision I tell him honestly.
Recently asking if I mind if his teenage nephews come stay for the weekend I ask where is the extra money going to come from to feed them and get them to/from work as its an hour round trip. I offer maybe just one night instead of the entire weekend. Automatically thatthey asked for the weekend. He says he doesn't know where the money will come from and he won't ask the his brother either and asks me to call and tell them no. Of course when I refuse I can tell he gets upset although he won't say it.
We don't argue about stuff its just more of one of us getting pi$$ed off until it blows over and then starting again the following week when another circumstance comes up. Honestly, I'm just getting tired of putting up. It has been nearly 10 years now but only 4 since our finances went together.
We are also expecting a child, which we could afford before the last 6 months came crashing down on us. Of course this is part of my anxiety over finances but being a man and his usual self he wants to live in la-la land until we don't have money to buy diapers.
I'm just so frustrated. Thanks for listening and letting me know that there is hope things will change. Atleast I know when the step-child becomes an adult it will be like winning the lottery!
I need some help here -- [2008-11-20]
I am so depressed... I don
I just filed bankruptcy 2 years ago because of this job. My income changed so drastically that I lost everything. My car, my home, all of it.I just got things back on track earlier this year and now this crap has to start all over again. I do not foresee being able to make my rent payments on my new house that I just moved into, my cable will be turned off tonight at midnight for nonpayment, I have an old car now and everything keeps tearing up on it and I cannot afford to fix it, I just looked in my closet and I have no clothes to wear anymore, I have gained 50 pounds, I cry all the time, I am by myself all the time in this house, my family all live about 50 miles from me, so it is not affordable to drive there all the time, I have no friends, and as you can tell, I am seriously DEPRESSED!!!
I don I have done everything. I have no life outside of my home anymore. I never go out, I never take trips, my 5 year old grandson just this weekend asked me why I did not buy him a birthday present for his birthday last month (no money) and Christmas is coming up, which of course will be more of the same since there is no money...
Sorry to unload, just needed somewhere to go for a minute...
Sorry you are feeling so down (sm) [2008-11-20]
First of all, relax. You need to go to a doctor and get on an antidepressant? No insurance? If you can get the money to go to the doc for one visit, you can get them to prescribe an antidepressant that is on Walmart's $4 list and get it for $4 a month. Call United Way and see if they can direct you where to get help with your rent. Don't worry about whether or not you have cable, you'll be okay without that unless you need it for your job? Don't worry about not being able to give Christmas gifts...just explain that you don't have the money. People will understand and your grandson can have it explained to him. I have the same isolation issues that you do because of the job. Can you go to a temp agency and see about getting a job outside of your house so you can be around people more? There is a website called Exercisefriends.com where you can meet people in your area who want exercise buddies, maybe just someone who is starting out trying to walk every day or something like that (not sure what your fitness level is). Or advertise on Craigslist for a walking buddy (but be careful of course when first meeting the person). I met one of my best friends this way and have known her for 4 years now. If you want an email buddy feel free to email me. I think everyone is struggling right now and it is hard. I would be happy to have you vent to me via email all you want. :-)
make a call [2008-11-20]
Look in the phone book under Alcoholics Anonymous and call the central office. Tell them you need someone to make a 12-step call. Someone from your local area who is in AA will come over to your house and talk to your husband and you can leave with the kids during this time. By the time you get back, your husband will have decided whether or not he will sober up. Usually the person he talked to will assume responsibility for taking him to the meetings or finding someone who will sponsor him. So you are off the hook at this point.
On the other hand, he may decide no thanks and then you will have your real answer.
AA is free and pretty crowded with new people around the holidays, so the timing is good. The average age of a person coming into AA is 25 to 45, so there should be plenty of people for him to talk to.
At the same meeting place there should be meetings for you called Al-Anon and for your son called Alateen.
Good Luck!
AA [2008-11-20]
Not someone from AA, a bunch of people! They love 12-step calls! They fight over who gets to go! It is a treat to help someone, to tell their horror stories to the new guy. They don't even care if they get the door slammed in their face! They will think is hilarious and tell the story in all their meetings! They are a happy bunch of guys and would love to help you out.
We have been spending less than 100 [2008-11-19]
And we are starving. DH took over going to the grocery store from me (He thought I spent too much when I would spend about 150 a week.) It has been months since we do not have a bare cupboard. I am not complaining. I understand we are broke and he needs to pay the creditors. But the one person who has pretty much stopped eating is me. I am home all day and there is never bread to make a sandwich and I often pass up supper because I am tired of eating junky stuff like mac and cheese or spaghetti with meat sauce. He and our 11 year old son, on the other hand eat thirds of whatever meal it is. I get kind of annoyed. Our littlest boy and middle girl eat very little. All 3 take their lunch to school. I say to DH either stop eating so much (for him and the older boy) or buy more. He flips his eyes at me. We even stopped getting microwave popcorn which used to fill them up. So, now I am hoping to work extra to go to the grocery store myself and put an extra 100 a week in myself, but I keep running out of work.
You see, this all started when we started running out of work in transcription about a year ago this fall, and my DH took over the bills. Apparently food was the first to be cut. And, BTW I don't ever go anywhere because there is no gas in my car, and it has 2 flat tires. We live by the school and I borrow DH's car to take the kids but it is always on empty. We seem to make it every time. Oh, well. No need to complain. Just cutting back. The family is lucky I work at home, don't use gas, barely eat. But I do have to pay 10 bucks a month for nerve pills, because it is hard doing without. Like I said, when work picks up transcribing first place I am going after I get gas for the car is to the food store. Eventually I can repair my flat tires.
We eat out an average of 4 times a week... [2008-11-19]
linch and/or dinner. We usually spend about 20-30 for lunch and 30-50 for dinner. We vary our restaurants, donjust drenched in a different gravy or sauce. We used to like Olive Garden several years ago, but that is so non-Italian now it's not worth it, just your average pasta drenched in some too cheesy, fattening sauce. We have a great Japenese sushi/steak house near us, a great prime rib place, a vegetarian restaurant that I love.
Gift card to a game store? (sm) [2008-11-19]
You could hardly go wrong with that. Here we have one called Gamestop and that is always the birthday gift everyone requests.
Ambrielle [2008-11-19]
I was really impressed with the feel of Ambrielle in the store but I cannot wear it for more than an hour without it irritating my skin. I'm not sure if it doesn't breath well or what the problem is but it becomes very uncomfortable and itchy. Of course I bought 3 of them at the time and can't return them now that I wore them and threw the tags in the trash thinking that they would be great, until I wore them for a length of time. I'm sure this doesn't happen to everyone but I would just suggest if anyone buys them to hang on to the tags a week or so to make sure.
I also didn't care for the straps as they are fabric over a small string and they tend to twist as the day goes on and bunch up if you have to adjust them more than an inch or so.
My daughter is 14, and her favorite gift [2008-11-19]
is a gift card. We have them here that are called All Mall Gift Certificates so they can be spent at any store in the whole mall.
Black Friday [2008-11-19]
My husband and I always shop on Black Friday, but if there's something we really want he goes out at about 4:00-5:00 in the morning to get it and then comes back to get me at around 9:00. I'm not a morning person at all. I usually don't go to bed unti 4:00 a.m. because of work so the thought of getting up that early doesn't appeal to me. We leave the kids at my parents where we spend Thanksgiving. Then we go out to a fantastic Greek Restaurant for lunch then back to grandma and grandpa and then travel back home an hour away. Then the next day it's off to cut down our Christmas tree.
My family is hurting :( [2008-11-19]
Some of you may remember the recent pet picture postings here. I posted a picture of my baby girl, Daisy, nursing her three babies who arenow nearly two years old. My husbandcame home about an hour and a half ago and went to let them inside, and the only boy (besides the dad), Chewy,did not come with the others. They all always come up on the deck when they hear his car, so he knew something was going on. He came into my office and asked if we had Chewy with us, and then went to see if he had gotten out of the fence. A few minutes later he came in and said that he found him still in the backyard, lying under the trees on a pile of leaves, and that he wasdead. We are all so sad . We do not know what happenedto our baby .. . he had been fine just a couple of hours before, when my son got home from school and went to see the dogs. He said that Chewy was acting no differently than usual and seemed fine. I am just beside myself not knowing what happened to this sweet little guy. He was the SWEETEST EVER and we will miss him dearly. WE LOVE YOU,CHEWY!!! May you rest in peace.
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