I would call the girl's parents and just tell them what happened. Be nice and non confrontationa

make a call [2008-11-20]
Look in the phone book under Alcoholics Anonymous and call the central office. Tell them you need someone to make a 12-step call. Someone from your local area who is in AA will come over to your house and talk to your husband and you can leave with the kids during this time. By the time you get back, your husband will have decided whether or not he will sober up. Usually the person he talked to will assume responsibility for taking him to the meetings or finding someone who will sponsor him. So you are off the hook at this point. On the other hand, he may decide no thanks and then you will have your real answer. AA is free and pretty crowded with new people around the holidays, so the timing is good. The average age of a person coming into AA is 25 to 45, so there should be plenty of people for him to talk to. At the same meeting place there should be meetings for you called Al-Anon and for your son called Alateen. Good Luck!

Oh, yeah, it's very nice and improved over the first models, of course. [2008-11-17]
It's roomier on the inside than you might expect. We bought the basic version, and it still has plenty of features. When gas was over $4.00 a gallon, my DH, who drives 50 miles round-trip to work each day, was saving $200 a month. Gas is lower now, but we still are saving money. Plus you never have to replace brakes on a Prius, and here in PA, I don't need to pay for emissions inspection since it burns so clean. We get our emissions sticker for free. There are a couple of other little perks like that with a Prius. And, of course, I just think it's fun. :)

American Girl Doll things [2008-11-16]
I posted this before and a very kind MT responded with American Girl dolls for sale for Christmas. I am still searching for Samantha, Kitand Nellie and I am also looking for extra American Girl outfits. Any suggestionswhere elseto look? I have watched Craig If any MT would like to sell American Girl doll things, please let me know. You can reach me by e-mail through this site. Thanks for any offers or adviceon getting second-hand AG dolls for Christmas gifts.

No, Blondie, give the dogs back or call the Humane Society.....s/m [2008-11-16]
who can take care of 10 (t e n ) dogs? This is CRAZY! Your husband is a coward. He should protect you. God knows what a 'deal' he made with this 'friend'.

Must be nice to know you have in-laws ...sm [2008-11-14]
who would help. My parents couldn't help. My father in law couldn't either BUT mother in law could but wouldn't I know because she is so tight. She would just say oh well loose all your sh**. She wouldn't come off her money.

Has This Ever Happened To Any Of You Here? [2008-11-13]
This was unreal...I had made a trip to the store for cat food (before I became cat food LOL!) and while slowing down behind a car that was turning, I got hit in the back. No real damage, just a scruff on the bumper of my Subaru Forester, and a bit of a blow to my ego, but the dang kid who hit me was texting her boyfriend while driving and obviously not paying attention to the road. She was only 19 years old! Holy cow! I got out, she got out...still texting. She said, Wait a minute, and continued texting. I couldn't believe it. I have that hands-free voice-activated cellphone setup in my Forester that DH set up for me, so I got back in and called the police department. If she hadn't been so rude, I might have let it go, but when she pulled that, I decided to teach her a lesson. She was horrified to learn that I called the cops while she was texting. She actually yelled at me, saying, My Dad and on and on. I just stood there and looked at her. The cop got there, threw the book at her: failure to yield, following too closely, texting while driving (it's a law here now -- you can't do that) and she has a nasty fine and her insurance is definitely going to go up. She was horrified. Maybe she'll think twice before texting while driving again...before she causes real damage and people get hurt. So thatHang up and drive! Has this ever happened to any of you?

Here's my kitty girl! [2008-11-13]
This is my kitty, Charlotte. She's an 8 or 9 year old Exotic Shorthaired Persian.

NIce, but a little 'scary' if you are not the owner..nm [2008-11-13]
nm

Wow! How nice, really beautiful, you are lucky to have horses!...nm [2008-11-13]
nm

Always, always call the cops sm [2008-11-13]
My husband was nearly killed by a tractor trailer driver who changed his story a dozen times, themedics were called but unfortunately, the other driver went his merry way and was not cited until days later for following too close, reckless endangerment, speeding, mistake in log book, and a laundry list, first he said my husband going too slow. Reconstruction said no way, but while my husband was in hospital having his scalp sewn back on, this guy ran away. Had to hire a detective to find him, went on for years before we got our bills paid, he got off with heavy fines and warnings he would go to jail if it happened again. It had happened in another state previously but could not bring that up in court. My sorrow - I should have had him arrested right that moment but I was not there. He should have been tested for drugs, etc. He went from saying husband's fault to that he dropped his coffee and was picking it up off the floor and then changed it again to something else. He still drives and my husband is totally disabled. Please get the cops involved the minute something happens - don't wait. I had no choice, I had to travel to another state to the hospital. I wish my husband were conscious enough to have him arrested right there. You did the right thing calling the cops, everyone should do that. Believe me, she could have killed you or someone else later. I hope you scared the pants off her.

Probably borrow from his parents - sm [2008-11-13]
they are loaded, though act poor (have a couple mil in the bank). Borrow enough to a pay off the house $40K if they would go for it, and I think they would, or sell the house (borrow from them until house is sold) and either rent for a while (we'd have about $140K after the sale of the house and mortgage paid off) or buy a much smaller house. We have land we can sell too so we would not be destitute though it would cause some problems.

Seems to me the people you call friends... [2008-11-11]
were trying to teach you a lesson. You are the one with the cell phone who doesnOkay. You don If I were you, IThank you very much. Your lesson was very well learned now get the h**l away from me. For crying out loud, with friends like that, who needs enemies. Life is too short to deal with that kind of crap. Go find some new friends who don't care if you text or not.

Girl, [2008-11-11]
don't go away mad . . .

I really hate this happened to you...sm [2008-11-10]
It gives all pits a bad name. I am an immense dog lover myself. I love all dogs. There are some pits and Rotties, etc. bred from family pets and bred to be family pets. Unfortunately there are some drug dealers and gangstas who want this big bad dog to go with their gangsta facade. It is so wrong. It is unfortunate because these dogs are all given a bad name for the actions of a few. It makes people weary of them rightfully. My pit came from a mother and father who are big ole babies, inside kept family pets and the grandparents on both sides were family pets too so I do know mine was not intentionally bred to bring out bad traits such as aggressiveness. I knew where he came from and knew what kind of ancestors he had. This eased my mind. My pitbull CJ is a big ole baby. He is weary of a stranger BUT I would never allow him out of the fenced in yard which is in my backyard. He is not allowed even out in my yard in the part that is not fenced in. I am not taking a risk of him biting someone. He is pretty much okay with people even he don't know if they don't approach him. If they give him his space he will give them theirs. That is when I have friends over he doesn't know. But I don't allow him to just be free roaming around and I cannot express how irresponsible that is. The owners should have been paid a visit by the animal control or police and told you keep him in or on a leash or you won't keep him. I am firmly against letting any dog roam free even a poodle I wouldn't because also they can get ran over or anything. It is just flat out irresponsible.

Same here - I can always find something nice to say if I try. [2008-11-10]
My mom always said if you donOh, that is so soft! or colorful, or unique...lol My MIL is notorious for thinking she knows me when she has no clue...even my husband will tell her I won't like something but she will still give it to me. If she mentions where she got it I will return it. If I can't return it I will re-gift it or use it as a tax deductible donation or regift. I try not to regift though because it usually means I'm going to give someone else a gift that isn't perfect for them. The way I look at it is this. If I gave someone a gift they didn't like I would want them to think of it as a nice gesture and thought of them BUT I would WANT them to get something else or give it to someone they know would use it. I wouldn't want them to feel obligated to use it or to hide it except when I come over, etc....so I follow suit with gifts that I am given.

It happened to me. (sm) [2008-11-09]
We had all sorts of vet bills from previous dogs, and then were hit with health bills of our own (both DH and I), and insurance that didn't turn out to be very good, and suddenly the reality was that we couldn't afford to care for our 2 dogs responsibly. We didn't have these dogs very long, but I'll be heartbroken if they aren't adopted.

This has happened before and ....sm [2008-11-08]
it is such a sad sad story. I am a pitbull owner. I will say these dogs are not for everyone. It takes a certain kind of owner to have these dogs and in the wrong hands they are dangerous. I am a dog lover. I love pits BUT there are mistakes people make such as having more than one pit of the same gender. I don't know the circumstances which led to this attack but I can say I do not believe the dogs attacked for no reason. Something can set them off. But a dog that is loved and is a stable well minded dog who loves the owner is not going to attack for no reason. Usually there are circumstances we don't know. The dogs could have got into a fight or simply a spat and he could have intervened and they might have attacked him in the heat of the moment. I would never have more than one at a time unless they were different genders. I will say again not a dog for everyone. Until we know the nature of the attack we can't judge.

Wake Up Call [2008-11-06]
Wake Up Call lyrics http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/m/maroon_5/wake_up_call.html

Whatever happened to M. Jackson [2008-11-02]
Does anyone know what ever happened to Michael Jackson (I don I know most don He made some great hits. Every once in awhile I will pull up his Youtube videos (beat it, billie jean, thriller, etc). He was such a great entertainer and I often wonder what went wrong with him and when. Just am curious.

That's really not nice of him, you poor thing [2008-11-02]
Good that he he let you do the baby!

We had dinner at a very nice restaurant sm [2008-10-31]
and then went home and ate the top of the cake....not so great, but it was fun. We also watched our wedding video. We had a very small reception, no band or dancing, but the song I had the Time of My Life (from Dirty Dancing) was played over and over on our honeymoon, so danced in our living room to that song and well.......one thing led to another. It was very romantic.

Something nice my DD said to me last night sm [2008-10-29]
She is away at college and out of the blue, my IM flashed and this is what she said: I just wanted to tell you that I am very grateful to have a mother like you. I have heard about other mothers and read in books and none of their moms listen to them like you do for me. you try to understand me and usually do. you don't tell me what to do, you make suggestions. you don�t treat me like a child and you are just awesome. I know that when I make a mistake it is not the end of the world for you and that is so important to me. You are always there for me when i need and even when I don�t. Thank you so much for being the mother that you are. You mean so much to me and I would never trade you for anyone else. I love you mom. I IMd back: OMG I don't know what to say. You know, you bring out the best in me. She said: No mom, YOU bring out the best in ME. Thank you.

On phone call: Yes, this is her. ARGH! Should be: This is SHE sm [2008-10-27]
and I was taught (112 years ago in school) that it is she and her brother not her and her brother. I know it is not always her or she, but I am not clear which is which. I often default to my elementary school English lessons.

Change your own oil. This is so easy whether your a guy or a girl [2008-10-22]
It�ll typically cost you $10 to change it, and you won�t have to wait at the mechanic for a few hours.

Not educational. This is something that should be the parents job to teach, not the school. sm [2008-10-16]
Besides, why should school children have a field trip to ANY wedding? What would people say if someone had a field trip to a church service? These are things that parents need to be able to teach their children when the time is right.

I can answer that one. Get Clairol [2008-11-22]
Nice and Easy Natural Highlight Neutral Blonde, 098. It is a great color of light blond with highlights. Your hair will be soft after using it too. When you go to drugstore.com, it gives it 5 stars.

Boobage - SM [2008-11-21]
I feel ya, girlfriend...I wear a 32DD and the choices are so limited. Believe it or not, ICurvation. I bought a couple of them when they were on sale because they were really cute (black with pink ribbon trim and leopard print demi-cup with pink ribbon trim), but didn't really expect much from them and figured they'd just look nice. Imagine my surprise when not only did they look great, they actually provided support, lol!!! I found that the demi-cup is actually even MORE supportive than the full cup style, which I hadn't expected. Have fun and show those girls off to full advantage :-)

Help is a safety net you have paid for sm [2008-11-21]
Food stamps are a safety net we all pay for, all forms of public assistance are things we have been paying for all along. TAKE the help you need! Do move closer to family if you possibly can. I have been in your shoes myself. I lost my home to foreclosure 4 years ago because of having a near-fatal drug interaction and losing my job of nearly 7 years. I made a couple of moves and finally ended up in a small town out of state from where I had lived for 30 years. I lived with a close friend for about 9 months and had the opportunity to buy a mobile home for $3000. The people I bought it from said I could make payments and I was able to pay it off in 5 months. It needed a lot of work and it has gotten it, most of which I have done myself. This project really helped me to regain parts of myself I had lost. It gave me a reason to get up and get going on my days off. I turned this ugly old thing into a lovely, comfortable home I cherish. I have lost about 50-60 lbs since living here and I have brought the idea of vastly cutting expenses in line with making more money. The end result is that I am very well off financially, better than in my entire life. DO get medication to help you if you can. I didn't have medication to help because I am allergic to every psychotropic in existence. I did this by pulling myself up by the boot straps, but if I could have had help, I would have. There IS a brighter future out there. You CAN have that brighter future because you DESERVE IT. That said, no one expects you to get there alone!!! Don't be embarrassed to ask and receive help. You will be able to help others later. Years ago, when my kids were young, I was a single parent, no support and it was Christmas time. My kids didn't even have adequate clothing or food. A neighbor I hardly knew handed me a Christmas card. Inside was a $100 gift card to K-Mart. She said that many years before that, she had been in my shoes and someone had given her $100 one Christmas, she was now paying this forward to me. The only provision was that I return this favor when I could, and that I bought something for myself too because I deserve nice things for my hard work. It was a turning point for me. I have been more of a giver since. Although I could have paid this back last year, I didn't know anyone who would appropriately benefit. This year, I do and I had to tell her that I was going to do this and why. She cried and felt embarrassed because, she said, she was usually in the position to give and it hurt a little to receive. I reminded her that she was GIVING me the gift of giving with pleasure. Others are going to give to you with pleasure, love, friendship and concern for your well being. TAKE IT. One day you'll post back here about how good things are and I'll want to hear it.

moving out of state [2008-11-21]
Check your divorce laws in your states. Many states will not let you or your (ex) spouse move out of state without permission of the other. Some even have a mileage radius. I think it's to keep both parents close to the kids and not having one parent run far away so the other can't ever see the kids again. My kids were 5 and 1 when I was in the process of getting divorced, and I moved out of state before I realized this. Fortunately my ex realized and understood the need for me and the kids to be close to my family for support, so it was written in the papers that it was okay for me to move out of state and he signed it.

Screen names...how did you come up with yours? [2008-11-21]
So how or why did you come up with the screen name you use here? blondie_1147, deenibeeni, cherrychecked, phillygal, LinK, Just the big bad, backward typist, gourdpainter, PAMT, PAMT~MDM, mtmomof2, Twiters, XanaX, Silly Girl, Old part-timer, SkateGirl, Just Me, starving artist, Horski, Lolabug, GabbyChick, Kendra, sbMT, Kaydie, Marmann, Amanda, Stardust and all others?

Has our country taken a turn for the ... [2008-11-21]
Our once great country, I afraid, has just turned a corner for the worse. I have watched as the mentality of our country has gone from setting your mind to something, working hard, and you can accomplish it to giving up, sitting back, and letting somebody else take care of them. I was brought up, as many were, with a good work ethic that was instilled in us by our parents. With the idea that if you want something you had to work for it, and by working for something you learned quickly the difference between wants and needs. There were always incentives for a person to strive to better themselves. Whether it were financial incentives, or just the pride you gained in knowing that you did something yourself, it didn�t matter. I wasn�t long ago that people had that �small town� mentality, and everybody knew their neighbors. And those neighbors helped each other out, in any situation, it was just what you did. And people were so proud that some times help would have to be disguised, you remember the lines like..�Mom made more stew than we could eat, could you help us out by taking it so that it doesn�t go to waste?� But, somewhere along the line those thoughts of some (I guess now the majority) have changed. Some how, if somebody works hard to gain something others feel entitled to have the same things, even if they didn�t have to go through the struggle to earn it. Some how, things like big screen TVs, cell phones, and shiny new cars have wrongly slipped from the �wants� list to the �needs� list. Somewhere the incentives to strive for betterment have been replaced by incentives to be lazy. The easy way out and hand outs are now the norm. The feeling of pride about being self sufficient is supposed to be replaced by guilt for having more than others. The �small town� mentality is gone and our neighbors have turned into strangers. People no longer help out their neighbors or even themselves, instead they sit and wait for the government to come solve things for them. And when help does come they complain that the help wasn�t good enough or didn�t come fast enough, the pride is gone. Well, I refuse to think that way, my small town roots and work ethic runs to deep. I refuse to let somebody take care of me while I am willing and able to take care of myself. I will continue to meet and know my neighbors and help them out when they need it. I will continue to work hard to take care of my needs and by doing so, my wants will take care of themselves. I will continue to volunteer for things and give to charities of my choice regardless of what the government wants to take away from me and give to the undeserving. My hope is to change the thinking back to the way it was. The sun will rise again tomorrow, I�ll keep doing what I do, and this country can be great again�.at least in my little corner of it�

it never really goes away, you just have to chalk it up [2008-11-21]
as a lesson learned. this is amazing, cuz the same thing just happened to me this week. been helping someone for ages, then they turn on me !! blew my mind and i we can only learn to surround ourselves with the loved ones around us. you can I and go down the long list of things that you know you are blessed with. this is the worst: youall the people who have done me wrong. so much for getting back to sleep once that list starts creeping into your consciousness. forgive yourself, realize it and remember, no good deed goes unpunished. -- sorry.

It's 23 degrees here [2008-11-21]
and we're having our first major blizzard. Just got home driving in it. No fun. Did I mention I hate snow?! Inside it's a nice toasty 68. Just watching The Ghost Whisperer and ready for a very early night.

Lolabug...lol...sm [2008-11-21]
Well Lola kinds of sounds like my first name and my husband used to call me (sorry this is really sappy)...butterfly...so I came up with bug out of that. Everybody's stories behind their names are pretty interesting!!!

I have a friend who left her live-in ...sm [2008-11-21]
boyfriend of 11 years who she had a baby with because he was doing drugs and wasn't coming home at night, going to strip clubs after work and not coming home, etc. She lived in MS close to me and her parents and all of her family lived in Las Vegas, NV. She left and never looked back. She said it was the hardest thing she ever had to do but she doesn't regret it and is so much happier now.

observation [2008-11-21]
Sounds like a good time to call mom and get some tips.

I am when I can get a hold of her...sm [2008-11-21]
I have been trying to call and can't get an answer.

OMG!!!! How terrible! I can not imagine...sm [2008-11-20]
how upset you must be. I wonder what on earth happened to him? That would drive me nuts! Only 2 years old! I am so sorry!!

Christmas Club...sm [2008-11-20]
I have three grown kids (includes 1 in-law) and I have money taken out of my paycheck through the year and whatever the amount is when I get the check, I divide that by 3 and that is how much I spend on the kids. It I put back through the year from my OT and get my husband something nice and then I just pick up a few inexpensive things along the way for a couple of other people I like to give a little something to. I don't think anybody really cares how much I spend on them, but I do try my best to be equal in what I spend on the kids, even at their ages now!

According to DH, our budget is $1,000 [2008-11-20]
But more likely I We have 3 kids. We usually get them 1 big gift to share and then round it out with smaller gifts. This year, they It The breakdown of the other $350: Parents $150, Grandma $25, Gift Exchange $60, Siblings (from my kids $20, Niece/nephew: $40, Teacher Gifts $30, Student Gifts: $15. The remaining $30 will go to Toys for Tots! Each of my kids like to pick out a $10 gift to put in. I have 3 siblings and 1 that My brother that Of course, my 2 unmarried siblings also buy small gifts for my children, so we always get them a little something from them -- usually lottery tickets or a gas card for Sheetz. $10 used to fill We do our exchange party on Christmas Eve. It keeps the kids entertained and gives them a little preview of what I have to say I enjoy Christmas Eve more than Christmas Day. It Teacher gifts kill me. It I usually go for a coffee mug with a Christmas scene or teacher saying on it and fill it with candy. Of course, DH thinks I do all this for Christmas for $1000, but why tell him and spoil it? We do a Christmas Club for $1000 every year and I just buy the other stuff here and there. We already got our Christmas gifts for ourselves -- a 46-inch LCD TV for DHand a Dooney Bourke purse with matching wallet for me. Now you all got me excited again about shopping next week. I I always wait until the day before Thanksgiving to do that so I know I won For those of you below who posted that you don Let me just say that I don I sometimes snag a deal or 2, but I learned a long time ago not to wait until Black Friday to get the most sought after items. Best to get them in Sept or Oct.

We did something similar [2008-11-20]
but it was a local theater gift card instead of the netflix. I didn't know netflix did such a thing. That's a great idea. A smore's kit is nice to make or homemade marshmellows (they are not that difficult to make as most people think) with homemade hot chocolate mix and some cute mugs. Also made fleece throws for everyone for xmas one year. YOu can get the no-sew fleece and just cut a fringe around the edge to finish it. Offer up a free baby sitting night to the parents, all you need is a card. Tuck it in the tree with their name on it. If there is something special that you make that someone likes you can make up a basket with many of the ingredients and include the recipe card. If it is cookies or something nonperishable you can include a finished version in the basket.

If you know their favorite snack [2008-11-20]
You could buy a nice gift box, the sturdy ones that look like they have wrapping paper on them already...maybe something to match the office, and then fill it with their favorite candy, snack, or coffee/creamors...whatever you know they like. Then wrap it with a nice ribbon.

My husband is oblivious to our finances [2008-11-20]
Sometimes that It sounds like maybe your husband is too proud to tell his family that he can I I would suggest talking to the leader of his family, the person who hosts the get-togethers, and let them know that you do the finances and you just don It doesn I would certainly let your husband know that you are going to say something beforehand, but he doesn I For birthdays, we take the time to call and wish that person a happy birthday. We don My brother lives about 2 hours away, so we don Unless his family is loaded, I'm sure they'll understand. As for the glasses, I just took my son for new glasses yesterday. The eye doctor said he needs a new prescription, but I asked if just the lenses could be replaced and the frames reused. He said absolutely. Our insurance covers new frames, lenses and the exam, but my son has a tendency to break things at the most inopportune time. We just bought him these glasses in June because he broke them and according to the insurance, it wasn Now that he is eligible for everything new, we asked for just the lenses. If he breaks his frames later in the year, we can just get new frames (covered by insurance) and pop the lenses in. The only problem there would be is they discontinue his frames because the new lenses probably wouldn So, something to consider here is, if your stepchild needs a new prescription and already has glasses, then I would check with your lawyer to see if you can just buy new lenses for the current frames. The frames are what normally cost the most anyway.

I don't think I understand [2008-11-20]
so just let him do whatever, support his decisions, and hope for the best? He has a good job it is just that so much of it is eaten by the attorneys, support, transportation, and crazy things the ex dreams up that the child must have and we are told we just have to pay it. It costs more than what I make to cover the mandatory expenses of my step-child. I gave up our finances about a year ago to give him a taste of what it was like. Stupidly thinking this would help. Obviously it hasn't but has made things worse. I always reassure him and tell him we will get through it, etc. but when he asks me to make a decision I tell him honestly. Recently asking if I mind if his teenage nephews come stay for the weekend I ask where is the extra money going to come from to feed them and get them to/from work as its an hour round trip. I offer maybe just one night instead of the entire weekend. Automatically thatthey asked for the weekend. He says he doesn't know where the money will come from and he won't ask the his brother either and asks me to call and tell them no. Of course when I refuse I can tell he gets upset although he won't say it. We don't argue about stuff its just more of one of us getting pi$$ed off until it blows over and then starting again the following week when another circumstance comes up. Honestly, I'm just getting tired of putting up. It has been nearly 10 years now but only 4 since our finances went together. We are also expecting a child, which we could afford before the last 6 months came crashing down on us. Of course this is part of my anxiety over finances but being a man and his usual self he wants to live in la-la land until we don't have money to buy diapers. I'm just so frustrated. Thanks for listening and letting me know that there is hope things will change. Atleast I know when the step-child becomes an adult it will be like winning the lottery!

Anyone go through a divorce w/younger kids? sm [2008-11-20]
Iit just isn while I have always felt you don't throw around the word divorce unless you mean it. Well, I mean it now. I gave him an ultimatum - straighten himself out or I leave with the kids. I am not going to go through 5 years of this again. It is affecting the kids, and my son is acting out to the point of saying he wishes he had never been born. I am giving my husband until after Christmas to decide what he is going to do, and if he does not value our marriage more than his alcohol, I am moving out of state. This is not to keep him away from the kids but because my parents (divorced also) are in a different state than I am and I have no family at all here. Has anyone had to make a decision like this? I donno other options. He refuses to go to counseling or to see a doctor about what I am positive is depression. Any tips or suggestions? Sorry to dump on everyone like this, thanks for reading.

Sorry you are feeling so down (sm) [2008-11-20]
First of all, relax. You need to go to a doctor and get on an antidepressant? No insurance? If you can get the money to go to the doc for one visit, you can get them to prescribe an antidepressant that is on Walmart's $4 list and get it for $4 a month. Call United Way and see if they can direct you where to get help with your rent. Don't worry about whether or not you have cable, you'll be okay without that unless you need it for your job? Don't worry about not being able to give Christmas gifts...just explain that you don't have the money. People will understand and your grandson can have it explained to him. I have the same isolation issues that you do because of the job. Can you go to a temp agency and see about getting a job outside of your house so you can be around people more? There is a website called Exercisefriends.com where you can meet people in your area who want exercise buddies, maybe just someone who is starting out trying to walk every day or something like that (not sure what your fitness level is). Or advertise on Craigslist for a walking buddy (but be careful of course when first meeting the person). I met one of my best friends this way and have known her for 4 years now. If you want an email buddy feel free to email me. I think everyone is struggling right now and it is hard. I would be happy to have you vent to me via email all you want. :-)

make a call [2008-11-20]
Look in the phone book under Alcoholics Anonymous and call the central office. Tell them you need someone to make a 12-step call. Someone from your local area who is in AA will come over to your house and talk to your husband and you can leave with the kids during this time. By the time you get back, your husband will have decided whether or not he will sober up. Usually the person he talked to will assume responsibility for taking him to the meetings or finding someone who will sponsor him. So you are off the hook at this point. On the other hand, he may decide no thanks and then you will have your real answer. AA is free and pretty crowded with new people around the holidays, so the timing is good. The average age of a person coming into AA is 25 to 45, so there should be plenty of people for him to talk to. At the same meeting place there should be meetings for you called Al-Anon and for your son called Alateen. Good Luck!

I've been there [2008-11-20]
I have been in your shoes. Last year my husband died unexpectedly at age 56, I literally woke up one morning and he was dead in our bed next to me (aneurysm). That started a downhill spiral . . . . since then I I canhow depressed III am working now and starting to pull myself up out of the dark hole I've been in. The poster above is right. You need to see a doctor. I found out that most major health systems have programs for those of us with no insurance and no money. Call their financial offices and just tell them point blank you need to be seen and you have no insurance. They will not refuse you. I found a clinic near my house that is part of a largehospital. I was able to see a doctor for a physicalandget my annual Pap and mammogram done at no charge. They gave me samples of my medications (I have asthma) for a few months until I had insurance again. They prescribed an antidepressant which worked wonders and they gave me that as samples each month. Move closer to your family. You My family has been supportive of all the decisions I Spend time with yourgrandchild, kids can make you feel so much better.If you I did. I didn Forjust myselfI was given 174.00 a month for food and it helped outtremendously. I know it You may be hesitant to take free medical care or ask for food benefits, but remember THIS IS ONLY TEMPORARY and you will get back on your feet. It may take a while, but you will make it. Good luck to you.

haven't been there [2008-11-20]
but just wanted to wish you well. It sounds like you are making the right decision. My husband's father is an alcoholic and from what I have heard (we have talked about it a lot) it is not pleasant for kids. You are making the right decision for them. My MIL did not do the same for her kids but my husband still wishes she had. His father is still an alcoholic and now we face the difficult decision with his influence on our children. We make the tough decisions that we feel are best for our kids. It's our job as parents and we know it is the right thing to do, despite what others within the family may say, namely the alcoholic FIL and MIL who still stands by his side and takes the abuse. Good luck. It will all work out in time.

We have been spending less than 100 [2008-11-19]
And we are starving. DH took over going to the grocery store from me (He thought I spent too much when I would spend about 150 a week.) It has been months since we do not have a bare cupboard. I am not complaining. I understand we are broke and he needs to pay the creditors. But the one person who has pretty much stopped eating is me. I am home all day and there is never bread to make a sandwich and I often pass up supper because I am tired of eating junky stuff like mac and cheese or spaghetti with meat sauce. He and our 11 year old son, on the other hand eat thirds of whatever meal it is. I get kind of annoyed. Our littlest boy and middle girl eat very little. All 3 take their lunch to school. I say to DH either stop eating so much (for him and the older boy) or buy more. He flips his eyes at me. We even stopped getting microwave popcorn which used to fill them up. So, now I am hoping to work extra to go to the grocery store myself and put an extra 100 a week in myself, but I keep running out of work. You see, this all started when we started running out of work in transcription about a year ago this fall, and my DH took over the bills. Apparently food was the first to be cut. And, BTW I don't ever go anywhere because there is no gas in my car, and it has 2 flat tires. We live by the school and I borrow DH's car to take the kids but it is always on empty. We seem to make it every time. Oh, well. No need to complain. Just cutting back. The family is lucky I work at home, don't use gas, barely eat. But I do have to pay 10 bucks a month for nerve pills, because it is hard doing without. Like I said, when work picks up transcribing first place I am going after I get gas for the car is to the food store. Eventually I can repair my flat tires.