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A good gift for either... [2008-11-19]
is the small cologne/perfume gift sets you can get at the mall stores. they usually have 5-8 small bottles for $20 or so. Sometimes you can also get whatever their free offer is for a sweatshirt or duffle bag with it too. We did this one year for all the nieces/nephews between 14 and 21 and they all said they loved it. It gave them an opportunity to try different things without being stuck with 1 fragrance and it surprisingly lasts a kid a pretty long time because they don't want to smell like that every day but when they go out it is something special.
The girl might also like a gift certificate for a makeup counter to get her colors done and skin consultation. That's if her parents allow her to wear make up. I wish someone had given me one of those when I was that age. Most teens don't realize its not the amount of makeup you put on but HOW you put it on that makes the difference.
You know, this is a good idea. I need [2008-11-19]
to finish out my 19-year-old's. She is away at college, so I think that would be a perfect fit for yer. Thanks!!
So what exactly has he done for the public good [2008-11-17]
in the last 30 years?
Good for you. nm [2008-11-16]
bb
I believe Grapes of Wrath did a good job. [2008-11-14]
xx
I believe Grapes of Wrath did a good job. [2008-11-14]
xx
A good web site...... sm [2008-11-14]
for using coupons and stocking up on groceries is www.thegrocerygame.com. It does cost a little to join the web site, but they have done an amazing job at matching coupons with various grocery sales. You can choose your stores, like Kroger, HEB, CVS, etc. I used to do this a long time ago and still have a stock pile of shampoo and toothpaste. I quit for a while, but I think I may need to go back to it. I could get like $300 of groceries for around $90. No lie!
wow, what a problem! Good [2008-11-13]
arguments for either side. I, myself, have begun to have problems trusting the CDC or FDA or anybody else, for that matter. They are so sure, then out of nowhere, they totally retract or claim they did not know. In the 50's,it was quit using butter, switch to oleo, now it's back to butter again. Same thing with coffee, tea, chocolate, you name it. Not to mention lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, spinich and beef. It does bring up an interesting thought though, remember the old arguments between doctors that cancer was or was not caused by a virus?
Good for you! [2008-11-13]
You know, every kid has to go through certain experiences in life - some sooner than others. Who knows, this circumstance could have prevented a bigger on, where people were actually hurt, later down the road. She will probably hear that from her father as well and she knows it. Losing text capability (which daddy probably pays for) isn't as devastating as she might think, losing a life is. Some day she will look back and know that you did the right thing.
A good tip:...........sm [2008-11-13]
Never go shopping on an empty stomach.....
good for you, wondered how you [2008-11-12]
were doing. I am so happy for you. The decision you made was a good positive one and that alone would improve your outlook and mood.
You are so good to think ahead! [2008-11-12]
We bought a PS2 last year...what were we thinking...now of course our son wants a PS3 for xmas this year. Go figure.
I hope to start a xmas fund for next year but I always say that and never get my rear in gear to do it. Xmas just gets more expensive as they get older.
I have only bought a few small things so far but trying to look at catalogs and get some ideas and things done now. It is right around the corner!
Good for you to be able to get a big gift out of the way so early. I bet that feels great! Who knows, maybe this will be a great xmas memory for you and your son. :)
This goes really good with ham [2008-11-11]
Mine is similar, except it has sour cream and one can of cream of chicken and one can of cream of mushroom. LOL, guess it doesn't matter as long as you get enough fat/calories in there, right?
Good one! [2008-11-11]
We do get a big kick out of the clown, which when wound up moves it's head slowly from side to side. Any other gift would have been long forgotten by now, but it's the weird gifts that are memorable!
Great use of the Elmo!
need a good free internet adult website/content [2008-11-10]
my NINE year old was looking at po rn on You Tube today. I walked in on him watching something totally adult. He said he clicked on something and when it came up it was that...i believed him but later on when I looked at the history there were 5 different adult videos he had viewed!!!!! how should I approach this??
This is a good answer - [2008-11-07]
It could be broken down into tiny chunks on a calendar.
Good question - ding! (that's the "correct" button you hear on game shows. [2008-11-05]
x
That is a good idea. I can try that...again (sm) [2008-11-03]
Thank you for your suggestions.
That's a good one - NM [2008-11-03]
NM
I used Debt Free Today. Pretty good [2008-11-03]
company. Never had any troubles with them. Just sent them a check once a month and they distributed among my creditors on the agreed amount. I think we paid off in 4 years. Was really nice!
What a good role model you are for good holiday spirit...wow nm [2008-11-03]
Good idea! [2008-10-31]
Next time I will take photos. The kindergarten teacher tried to get this kid the appropriate help but the school administration stood in the way. It's horrible. All the kindergarten parents were upset -- we even went to the papers. Nothing worked. This bully hit a girl on the head last year with a chair. He didn't get punished. I'm wondering what happened to the Zero Tolerance policy?
uuuhhhmmm uuuhhmmm good! nm [2008-10-30]
x
A wise old sage said: Beans, beans, are good for the heart .... [2008-10-30]
(you know the rest!) :)
Looking for a good [2008-10-28]
Any suggestions? I don
Probably self-explanatory... [2008-11-22]
On a personal level, I'm gothic...
On a professional level, I'm an MT.
People are somehow always taken aback at that combination, but I rather enjoy demolishing the preconceived stereotypes of others, so it's all good.
Rock on, my fellow MTs :)
live in a town of <150. No zeros. [2008-11-22]
that's less than 150 people, 13 miles from nearest grocery, in the middle of the USA...and i grew up in a big city in CA. but whoohoo!! now we have a cell tower too. turkeys roam the yard every day. sometimes deer, right in town :) and we've been upgraded to high speed I/N as well. Living is good!!
Boobage - SM [2008-11-21]
I feel ya, girlfriend...I wear a 32DD and the choices are so limited. Believe it or not, ICurvation. I bought a couple of them when they were on sale because they were really cute (black with pink ribbon trim and leopard print demi-cup with pink ribbon trim), but didn't really expect much from them and figured they'd just look nice.
Imagine my surprise when not only did they look great, they actually provided support, lol!!! I found that the demi-cup is actually even MORE supportive than the full cup style, which I hadn't expected.
Have fun and show those girls off to full advantage :-)
Oh my! I feel for you.. sm [2008-11-21]
Yes you are definitely depressed and with good reason. I don't know what to say. Can you find a cheaper place to live? Better yet, go move by your family. If you cannot afford it then go to your children and ask if you can stay with them a while while you save the money up to move. I would want to know if my mom was depressed and needed some help. You need to be around family. You don't need to live there alone with noone around for 50 miles. Go to family.
Help is a safety net you have paid for sm [2008-11-21]
Food stamps are a safety net we all pay for, all forms of public assistance are things we have been paying for all along. TAKE the help you need! Do move closer to family if you possibly can.
I have been in your shoes myself. I lost my home to foreclosure 4 years ago because of having a near-fatal drug interaction and losing my job of nearly 7 years. I made a couple of moves and finally ended up in a small town out of state from where I had lived for 30 years. I lived with a close friend for about 9 months and had the opportunity to buy a mobile home for $3000. The people I bought it from said I could make payments and I was able to pay it off in 5 months. It needed a lot of work and it has gotten it, most of which I have done myself. This project really helped me to regain parts of myself I had lost. It gave me a reason to get up and get going on my days off. I turned this ugly old thing into a lovely, comfortable home I cherish. I have lost about 50-60 lbs since living here and I have brought the idea of vastly cutting expenses in line with making more money. The end result is that I am very well off financially, better than in my entire life.
DO get medication to help you if you can. I didn't have medication to help because I am allergic to every psychotropic in existence. I did this by pulling myself up by the boot straps, but if I could have had help, I would have. There IS a brighter future out there. You CAN have that brighter future because you DESERVE IT. That said, no one expects you to get there alone!!!
Don't be embarrassed to ask and receive help. You will be able to help others later. Years ago, when my kids were young, I was a single parent, no support and it was Christmas time. My kids didn't even have adequate clothing or food. A neighbor I hardly knew handed me a Christmas card. Inside was a $100 gift card to K-Mart. She said that many years before that, she had been in my shoes and someone had given her $100 one Christmas, she was now paying this forward to me. The only provision was that I return this favor when I could, and that I bought something for myself too because I deserve nice things for my hard work. It was a turning point for me. I have been more of a giver since. Although I could have paid this back last year, I didn't know anyone who would appropriately benefit. This year, I do and I had to tell her that I was going to do this and why. She cried and felt embarrassed because, she said, she was usually in the position to give and it hurt a little to receive. I reminded her that she was GIVING me the gift of giving with pleasure.
Others are going to give to you with pleasure, love, friendship and concern for your well being. TAKE IT. One day you'll post back here about how good things are and I'll want to hear it.
Also I want to add....sm [2008-11-21]
As other posters mentioned an antideppresant can do a lot of good too. Go see a doctor. I have taken Zoloft for years.
I would have divorced a long time ago....sm [2008-11-21]
when my husband had a drug problem. I didn't because my son told me he would not come with me but that he would choose to stay with his dad. He was around 7 years old at the time. I couldn't leave my son. So I didn't leave. He is so close to his daddy. He would pick his dad drugs and all over me any day of the week and that hurt me very bad because I have always been a good mom. So I stayed. I guess God helped me though because my husband quit using drugs miraculously later and we are doing pretty good now.
Just check all the ads in the newspapers. [2008-11-21]
Most stores have special coupons for early birds on Friday morning. Around here, stores open around 4 a.m. and last year we got there at 3 and stood in line in the cold just waiting to get in. Good luck. Don so unless you are first in line at those places you are usually out of luck. I know last year, people were in line at Best Buy at 2 a.m. waiting for it to open at 5.
I agree with all of the above. sm [2008-11-21]
You are younger than you think. Also, I do not agree with the 2nd BOS but I do read their foolish rules, and especially learn the dosages, etc. That is the only worthwhile change that is important. I think you would do great working on your own with your own accounts as you have a lot of years ahead to work, but either way, you will do well. Some of these tests are ridiculous,so don't feel bad about them as they are looking for low-rate compensation and I found SOME of those in supervisory positions, only some, don't know what they're doing. Some of them are not true transcriptionists. So don't be discouraged, there is something out there for you. Don't settle for less, it's not you - it's the way the industry is right now and many are being taken advantage of. Be choosy, don't work for less than you're worth. You can do it! Watch out for those who may try to take advantage of you though - there are some money-grabbing numb nuts out there running these companies. Be choosy who you trust. Trust yourself! Good luck! {{ }}
Has our country taken a turn for the ... [2008-11-21]
Our once great country, I afraid, has just turned a corner for the worse. I have watched as the mentality of our country has gone from setting your mind to something, working hard, and you can accomplish it to giving up, sitting back, and letting somebody else take care of them.
I was brought up, as many were, with a good work ethic that was instilled in us by our parents. With the idea that if you want something you had to work for it, and by working for something you learned quickly the difference between wants and needs.
There were always incentives for a person to strive to better themselves. Whether it were financial incentives, or just the pride you gained in knowing that you did something yourself, it didn’t matter.
I wasn’t long ago that people had that “small town” mentality, and everybody knew their neighbors. And those neighbors helped each other out, in any situation, it was just what you did. And people were so proud that some times help would have to be disguised, you remember the lines like..”Mom made more stew than we could eat, could you help us out by taking it so that it doesn’t go to waste?”
But, somewhere along the line those thoughts of some (I guess now the majority) have changed. Some how, if somebody works hard to gain something others feel entitled to have the same things, even if they didn’t have to go through the struggle to earn it. Some how, things like big screen TVs, cell phones, and shiny new cars have wrongly slipped from the “wants” list to the “needs” list.
Somewhere the incentives to strive for betterment have been replaced by incentives to be lazy. The easy way out and hand outs are now the norm. The feeling of pride about being self sufficient is supposed to be replaced by guilt for having more than others.
The “small town” mentality is gone and our neighbors have turned into strangers. People no longer help out their neighbors or even themselves, instead they sit and wait for the government to come solve things for them. And when help does come they complain that the help wasn’t good enough or didn’t come fast enough, the pride is gone.
Well, I refuse to think that way, my small town roots and work ethic runs to deep. I refuse to let somebody take care of me while I am willing and able to take care of myself. I will continue to meet and know my neighbors and help them out when they need it. I will continue to work hard to take care of my needs and by doing so, my wants will take care of themselves. I will continue to volunteer for things and give to charities of my choice regardless of what the government wants to take away from me and give to the undeserving.
My hope is to change the thinking back to the way it was. The sun will rise again tomorrow, I’ll keep doing what I do, and this country can be great again….at least in my little corner of it…
Also, if there is a really popular item you want...sm [2008-11-21]
you could map out the store. Saw this on the news once where a lady and her husband drew out a map and each aimed for a specific department/item. It was pretty comical, but efficient when you think about it. As for opening times, the ads will let you know. Anyway, good luck!
it never really goes away, you just have to chalk it up [2008-11-21]
as a lesson learned. this is amazing, cuz the same thing just happened to me this week. been helping someone for ages, then they turn on me !! blew my mind and i we can only learn to surround ourselves with the loved ones around us. you can I and go down the long list of things that you know you are blessed with.
this is the worst: youall the people who have done me wrong. so much for getting back to sleep once that list starts creeping into your consciousness.
forgive yourself, realize it and remember, no good deed goes unpunished. -- sorry.
This may sound a little weird [2008-11-21]
But I live in a really big city and I would put him in a retirement complex. That is a really good place for people with lots of money who don't feel like cooking for themselves or being alone. I hope you live in a big city too. Good Luck!
observation [2008-11-21]
Sounds like a good time to call mom and get some tips.
black friday [2008-11-20]
I went one time...and won I guess it would be better if I had someone to go with, but even then it gets crazy! Good luck to you! I will stay at home on Black Friday shop online!
My husband is oblivious to our finances [2008-11-20]
Sometimes that It sounds like maybe your husband is too proud to tell his family that he can I I would suggest talking to the leader of his family, the person who hosts the get-togethers, and let them know that you do the finances and you just don It doesn I would certainly let your husband know that you are going to say something beforehand, but he doesn
I For birthdays, we take the time to call and wish that person a happy birthday. We don My brother lives about 2 hours away, so we don Unless his family is loaded, I'm sure they'll understand.
As for the glasses, I just took my son for new glasses yesterday. The eye doctor said he needs a new prescription, but I asked if just the lenses could be replaced and the frames reused. He said absolutely. Our insurance covers new frames, lenses and the exam, but my son has a tendency to break things at the most inopportune time. We just bought him these glasses in June because he broke them and according to the insurance, it wasn Now that he is eligible for everything new, we asked for just the lenses. If he breaks his frames later in the year, we can just get new frames (covered by insurance) and pop the lenses in. The only problem there would be is they discontinue his frames because the new lenses probably wouldn So, something to consider here is, if your stepchild needs a new prescription and already has glasses, then I would check with your lawyer to see if you can just buy new lenses for the current frames. The frames are what normally cost the most anyway.
there is a parallel universe! [2008-11-20]
Depressed is the right word for what he feels, so you can shut your mouth right now. This is all about guilt.
I am a step-mom too and I swear you are telling my story down to the glasses!
I would love to tell you that you are in this together and partners, etc., but the truth is my husband did not come around until he got a good job, a really good job that had status and paid a lot of money, and he had to do that all on his own. I let him buy expensive clothes, because for some reason, every time he got a raise it co-incided with buying a nicer suit or tie, so you can help him there.
All the nightmarish gift exchanges, arguments about buying lotto tickets, not eating out, step-kids, all the horrific details and arguments just came down to him deciding to step up. Then it all just went away, the depression, the lotto tickets, and the give away the farm stuff too.
Good luck to you! Don't give up on him!
I don't think I understand [2008-11-20]
so just let him do whatever, support his decisions, and hope for the best?
He has a good job it is just that so much of it is eaten by the attorneys, support, transportation, and crazy things the ex dreams up that the child must have and we are told we just have to pay it. It costs more than what I make to cover the mandatory expenses of my step-child.
I gave up our finances about a year ago to give him a taste of what it was like. Stupidly thinking this would help. Obviously it hasn't but has made things worse. I always reassure him and tell him we will get through it, etc. but when he asks me to make a decision I tell him honestly.
Recently asking if I mind if his teenage nephews come stay for the weekend I ask where is the extra money going to come from to feed them and get them to/from work as its an hour round trip. I offer maybe just one night instead of the entire weekend. Automatically thatthey asked for the weekend. He says he doesn't know where the money will come from and he won't ask the his brother either and asks me to call and tell them no. Of course when I refuse I can tell he gets upset although he won't say it.
We don't argue about stuff its just more of one of us getting pi$$ed off until it blows over and then starting again the following week when another circumstance comes up. Honestly, I'm just getting tired of putting up. It has been nearly 10 years now but only 4 since our finances went together.
We are also expecting a child, which we could afford before the last 6 months came crashing down on us. Of course this is part of my anxiety over finances but being a man and his usual self he wants to live in la-la land until we don't have money to buy diapers.
I'm just so frustrated. Thanks for listening and letting me know that there is hope things will change. Atleast I know when the step-child becomes an adult it will be like winning the lottery!
make a call [2008-11-20]
Look in the phone book under Alcoholics Anonymous and call the central office. Tell them you need someone to make a 12-step call. Someone from your local area who is in AA will come over to your house and talk to your husband and you can leave with the kids during this time. By the time you get back, your husband will have decided whether or not he will sober up. Usually the person he talked to will assume responsibility for taking him to the meetings or finding someone who will sponsor him. So you are off the hook at this point.
On the other hand, he may decide no thanks and then you will have your real answer.
AA is free and pretty crowded with new people around the holidays, so the timing is good. The average age of a person coming into AA is 25 to 45, so there should be plenty of people for him to talk to.
At the same meeting place there should be meetings for you called Al-Anon and for your son called Alateen.
Good Luck!
Thanks everyone sm [2008-11-20]
I didnthey would even get in the door, though, because my husband would probably slam the door. This kills me too because without the substance abuse, he is a good person, and I wish he could just see that he could be that person again. He is not and has never been physically abusive, but the verbal abuse is just as painful. Addiction and depression are hard things to conquer, but this is his last chance with me. I am so thankful that I have the ability to get up and go with this profession and that I have somewhere to go.
I've been there [2008-11-20]
I have been in your shoes. Last year my husband died unexpectedly at age 56, I literally woke up one morning and he was dead in our bed next to me (aneurysm). That started a downhill spiral . . . . since then I I canhow depressed III am working now and starting to pull myself up out of the dark hole I've been in.
The poster above is right. You need to see a doctor. I found out that most major health systems have programs for those of us with no insurance and no money. Call their financial offices and just tell them point blank you need to be seen and you have no insurance. They will not refuse you. I found a clinic near my house that is part of a largehospital. I was able to see a doctor for a physicalandget my annual Pap and mammogram done at no charge. They gave me samples of my medications (I have asthma) for a few months until I had insurance again. They prescribed an antidepressant which worked wonders and they gave me that as samples each month.
Move closer to your family. You My family has been supportive of all the decisions I Spend time with yourgrandchild, kids can make you feel so much better.If you I did. I didn Forjust myselfI was given 174.00 a month for food and it helped outtremendously. I know it You may be hesitant to take free medical care or ask for food benefits, but remember THIS IS ONLY TEMPORARY and you will get back on your feet. It may take a while, but you will make it. Good luck to you.
haven't been there [2008-11-20]
but just wanted to wish you well. It sounds like you are making the right decision. My husband's father is an alcoholic and from what I have heard (we have talked about it a lot) it is not pleasant for kids. You are making the right decision for them. My MIL did not do the same for her kids but my husband still wishes she had.
His father is still an alcoholic and now we face the difficult decision with his influence on our children. We make the tough decisions that we feel are best for our kids. It's our job as parents and we know it is the right thing to do, despite what others within the family may say, namely the alcoholic FIL and MIL who still stands by his side and takes the abuse.
Good luck. It will all work out in time.
I agree with the posters below. [2008-11-20]
You need to move closer to family and see a doctor. You can also find the local social services department and they will provide free medications for 6 months. you will have to see one of their doctors but and fill out some paperwork but that's the only catch.
Depression is higher around the holidays. The weather, finances, family, on top of every day stresses can be overwhelming. Being in this antisocial job doesn't help either. I have often thought of getting something a few days a week just to get out of the house. I think it would do anyone good.
Know that things could always be worse and they will get better. Your grandson is young, he doesnwhere as this is a common occurrence in kids. I thought it was only my child but since have found many others are the same.
Keep your head up and do what you can. It's ok to cry and vent to others. Don't keep it all bottled up inside. You will be surprised to find who your true friends and family are when you open up and really need them.
Agree with below, don't bottle it up sm [2008-11-20]
I tend to do this also and ended up with shingles at the age of 14 and again at age 34 last year due to stress. Meeting new people as suggested by others is a great idea. If you want, trying visiting a local church. This is one of the things that helped me the most since I started going again. The socialization alone has been almost as good for me as the messages.
I love Mexican food, but sometimes I [2008-11-19]
make my own or other stuff and make my own TV dinners. Chicken pot pie sounds good with the cooler weather. Could also pick up a presmoked presliced brisket or ribs and heat in the crock pot. Have the recipe for Wendy's chili which I make (TopSecretRecipes.com).
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