My 19 year old daughter wants to join the Army. I'm very scared at the thought. Any advice out th

If your mom and dad just divorced this year, have you ever thought of depression? sm [2008-11-22]
Maybe your dad is going through a real hard adjustment to his new life and could use a little help or boost from you instead of a cold shoulder. Sounds to me like he might just be in some major depression as his life has had a drastic change. Reach out to him and help him in his time of need. Sure he is an adult, but everyone can walk on hard times with major traumatic events going on in their life and he may just lack desire to care due to his depression.

I usually do a lot of handmade gifts. This year each kid gets $100 they are all grown sm [2008-11-21]
I make my oldest son boxer shorts, he only likes the ones I make. My other son wanted a robe and matching PJ pants. Daughter wanted a couple of outfits and a denim jacket. My mom wanted something I had knitted up for her. Stepdad just wants to be remembered. My brother won't take anything from me, so no problem there. I will do some small things for my friends, but I won't spend $500 total, even with giving the 3 kids $100 each. I have NEVER spent that much on Christmas! I have worked like a dog all year, but I have had no time to do these things they think they want.

same here! thought at the time it was [2008-11-20]
gonna be kill or git killed!

My daughter is 14, and her favorite gift [2008-11-19]
is a gift card. We have them here that are called All Mall Gift Certificates so they can be spent at any store in the whole mall.

My daughter is and she is 15 [2008-11-18]
There is a midnight showing here on Thursday nite but she hasn't asked if she can go. I guess she knows the answer will be NO! She can wait until the weekend. I am looking for something to read now so maybe I will take a look at the book.

My daughter had the books and I read them [2008-11-18]
at 50. Absolutely love them and am going with my daughter and her friends to see it. I was disappointed after I read the last book that there were not more. I am currently also watching TrueBlood on HBO and absolutely love it. It is based on a series of 9 books and I am on book #5. Certainly would not recommend the series or books for young teens (very graphic in all aspects), but very good series. The series is not following the books, which is a little disappointing however. I only hope the Twilight movie in in line with the books.

My daughter mentioned True Blood before [2008-11-18]
but I told her no way. She's only 14. I heard about the series, but I haven't had a chance to watch it. If I had a moment to read, I'd like to read the Twilight books myself, but I just can't seem to find a minute to do any reading. My daughter is going on Friday with her Twilight school group and then again on Saturday.

Never before Dec.10 but this year need uplifting sm [2008-11-17]
Perhaps I can ask hubby to drag out my nice blue spruce from the basement for Thanksgiving as where I live the recession is hitting big and we need some joy. I will never forget the kids discovering the tree was fake as it is pretty well made and looks real. It was a hilarious moment of shrieking, Hey, Guys, this tree is fake! Used tohave beautiful, country-themed tastefullydecorated trees and wreaths put up in mid-Dec.So, what the heck, Ireason why I went fake and a bad tree that got so bald by Christmas we had to take it down and had no tree at all that year. Just trying to be festive and lighten the mood. Maybe I will go early, depending on hubbyThat thing again! Oh well.Gotta loosen up a bit.

Need some advice on an old friendship -- [2008-11-16]
I got divorced 7 years ago. Started out as a friendly divorce and then I started dating a man that my ex did not like (because he is black) and we quit speaking at all. Then, one of my very good friends started backing off from the friendship andI thought it was because I was openly dating a black man. Well, 4 months later, I heard that she was dating my exhusband. I called her and asked her about it and of course she denied it, could not believe I accused her of that, she would never do that to me..... on and onand on. To make a long story short, of course 2 months later I found out it was true, they had bee seeing each other for about 6 or 7 months. Anyway, during that time period after I knew that they were together but before they broke up, I would call her occasionally if I needed information on my son (who lived with his dad and would not speak to me at that time becaue of brainwashing) and we stayed friendly on the phone, felt like old times, etc. Then they broke up and now occasionally I get the urge to call her or she will call me for something, and it is like nothing ever happened. We laugh and cut up and it I have some thoughts though about when it really started, before we were even divorcing or during the divorce, and then sometimes I get really mad because she lied to me in the first place and let me keep trying to have a friendship, and then sometimes I miss her and think it does not matter because we were divorced and he was free and I definitely did not want him back. My problem is what to do? Forgive her and forget her... forgive her and be friends again... ask her the questions I need answers to and then decide whether to be friends??? And the other big problem is my new husband gets very upset every time I even speak to her because she did thatto me when she was my friend and he says you never go behind friends to their love interests. Advice please....

I still get a couple loaf pans of it every year at butchering time [2008-11-15]
DH doesn't touch it but I love it. I grew up on it too. I also grew up on Spam. Mom had a stove that had a pull out griddle above the oven and she would put spam and egss on there for a Tuesday night supper. I have 2 cans of Spam in my pantry now. The ingredients state: Pork with ham, mechanically separated chicken, water , salt, modified potato starch, sugar, hickory smoke flavoring (I have the hickory smoke flavor), and sodiu nitrite. Opps. There's that bad word-sodium nitrite.

I need some advice [2008-11-15]
Ok this is the story: My husband is still friends with his first girlfriends family. This does not bother me. She did a couple of things to really disgrace her family when she was dating him but after a period of time he still kept in touch with them as we live in a very small community. When we met and got engaged they were all very kind to me and the mother even did the cake and flowers for our wedding. The ex is never around much so no big deal. Well this past weekend her great grandmother passed. My husband had known this woman for sometime and the mother asked him to come to the funeral and told me I was not to feel like I shouldnI. To which the ex rolled her eyes and looked at her HUSBAND. So we walked away. To tell you the truth, we didn't really care. Well we get a phone call about an hour ago from the exum we aren Well, knowing how immature the ex and her husband are, we knew they were behind this (plus we could hear them in the background). So my husband told the boy Look, it Well a few minutes later he gets a text message from the brother saying my mom can (which obviously is not true since we saw her Wednesday night and Thursday afternoon and she was obviously not mental). So my husband sent back a message saying Look, whatever issues your sister has with me and your mom having an ADULT friendship, she needs to take those up with your mom, but quit trying to start drama. Well a few minutes later the phone rings. My husband handed me the phone. Knowing how mad he was at the moment, I answered. It was the ex. She asked if she could talk to him, and I said No. This needs to stop right now, it She said well my mom is really going crazy and she can. She went on for about five minutes and I said fine, we won I'm just so angry right now! I mean this is high school drama! What would you do? I know the mom will be absolutely heartbroken if my husband and I just stop coming to see her and talking to her (since her lovely daughter never comes home). I mean except for the funeral, we never go around if she is going to be there, and we don't sit there and talk bad about her or anything. I honestly think she knows she screwed up by messing around on him SIX YEARS AGO and is just upset that he's married and happy and it sounds like her husband is a jerk.

You did the right thing. A year and a half ago 5 girls, sm [2008-11-13]
from a town that I used to live in, (1 had been in preschool with my daughter), just graduated from high school, were on their way to the family cottage of one of the girls, and they were all killed in a crash. There had been a text message sent from the driver's phone just before the crash. Everyone left behind was devastated. Hopefully your actions will save her life.

I thought her face looked like she had Yorkie ...sm [2008-11-13]
in her. She is so pretty. I would love to see the pups all grown up now. What was the father of the pups? Yorkie, Shih Tzu, etc? I bet they are cuties too.

"It's the thought that counts" - sm [2008-11-11]
Anyone who thinks enough of you to give you anything at all, deserves a heart-felt 'thank you'. All it means in the end is that they gave you something to let you know you mean something to them. When I was a kid, a girl I knew had about 30 friends she wanted to give a holiday card to, and only had 15 cards. And no money to buy more. So, she tore each card in half, and gave each half to all 30 of her friends. Sure, you got a printed message that either said, 'Merry Chr- an- Happy Ne-', or else you got one that said, '-istmas -d a -w Year'. But each half had a personal, handwritten holiday message to the recipient on it, and we all treasured our half-cards as much as if they'd been whole, because of the person that gave them to us. So, it really is the though that counts!

My daughter (the youngest) figured it out [2008-11-11]
at about age 12 or 13 when she was awake when I put a quarter under her pillow for a tooth. She didn't let on to me, but says now (she's 17) that she extrapolated on her own that if the Tooth Fairy didn't exist, probably Santa didn't either. She says she never felt lied to, and cherishes the magic she felt back then.

Another thought. [2008-11-10]
If you were all traveling, they should have wondered and checked on you for safety Didn That would hurt my feelings. If you make plans with a friend and they don't show up, you should at least check to make sure they're okay.

Well it sounds to me like everyone thought you already knew (sm) [2008-11-10]
I mean it just sounds like they thought everyone was meeting back up for a movie and wondered where you were.

My oldest daughter knew when she was 10 [2008-11-10]
Kids talk at school and on the bus, and I'm sure that's how she found out about Santa and the Easter Bunny, etc. Of course now she's 14 and tells me how could someone believe in a huge bunny who comes to your house and leaves candy. LOL. I also have a 5 year old and the older one knows under no circumstances is she to tell her sister anything. She can find out on her own. I think you should just let him know that he shouldn't tell the younger ones just like you were planning.

I did it a couple year ago , got 130 or 135 forget - sm [2008-11-09]
which, but either is a very respectable score. My one brother has a genius IQ, and my other is very intelligent, and I have a good head on my shoulders.....though have a usless college degree for the most part, may go back one of these days and get an accounting degree or nursing, who knows.

My daughter's boyfriend's hair is the [2008-11-07]
most gorgeous long blond hair you have ever seen. It just makes me sick!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I never thought to look for a website - [2008-11-05]
I just watch them on YouTube all the time and of course I have both of their albums and all of their B-Side Collection on my iTunes. Want to get Ragdoll and Myself too. Don't they put on a show?! Adam is so yummy! They were on 90210 one episode, which should be coming up in a few weeks on SoapNet on Sleep In Saturday.

I have a 16-year-old and 14-year-old..... [2008-11-04]
They donsocially? They are at school socializing all day......Yes, I'm too strict!!!

I have a 17 year old daughter, a senior. [2008-11-04]
She actually doesn't ask to be out during the school week. She's in drama club and working on college applications and homework. If she did ask, I think as long as her homework was done I'd probably let her be out until about 9:00. Her bedtime isn't until 11, but she needs the wind-down time. Weekends, it's midnight.

Exactly how my ex thought. [2008-11-03]
x

I made Cinnebons with my bread machine one year. [2008-11-02]
That was the year I heard the most positive comments back. Loved them! Used disposable 8 x 8 tins and wrapped them up pretty with red and green Saran wrap. Over the years I have gotten the plastic trays that are shaped like Santa or something like that and made cookies, fudge, made 1 of the slots mixed nuts and mints. Those also went over well, especially the families with kids.

Bring ads from other stores. Most pricematch..sm. [2008-11-22]
So you donThus eliminating running all over town in a mad rush. All you have to do is get to the sale item at that store first before it It makes it sooo much easier and a lot less stressful. I hope I worded that so it makes sense. I'm tired. Or, get together the day before with a few other people who are going.Each of you is designated a different store and picks up what the others want at their designated store. Then meet for breakfast afterwards to exchange the purchases as well as horror/humor storiesfrom theadventures.Thus, again, eliminating the rushing from one place to another. I think I I heard you can do that for theblack friday sales and some store will even let you buy online and pick up at the store. (later, after the rush and madness is over!) Forthe virgin poster, beware, some people can be downright mean, nasty,rude and even violentthat morning. Seriously.Oh, and NEVER leave your cart unattended if you were lucky enough to getone of the limtedamounts per store items. People will literally take them right out of your cart if you And keep your purse in sight at all times. If you bring a purse, have it hang in front of you and not on your side. I like to just keep my money and/or credit card tucked snugly in my front pocket of my jeans and not even bother with a purse.

OK, I rolled mine over into AARP [2008-11-22]
in January. I made $850 the first quarter and now I have lost $1500 for the year. They put everything in the most conservative things they had because of my age. My friend, however, has lost 50+% of hers this year.

We don't do christmas lights. Instead we [2008-11-22]
do halloween decorations. We have more fun with that and it helps that halloween usually falls during a time when our energy bills are normally the lowest for the year.

OMG! I did the same thing. I have a picture..sm [2008-11-21]
I My kids were younger so the dollar store was great! Seriously, my living room was full! It For little kids that was easy. But now they I miss those days of buying from the dollar store and filling the living room. Now, theyonly get 1 or 2 presents and I hate it. It makes me cry every year. I'll look for that picture on my break and try to upload it.

Birthdays with holidays. [2008-11-21]
Sometimes I like that the birthdays are around the holidays because then I can buy extra stuff and look at it all and decide how to split it up between the 2. Other times, like this year, we don't have much $ so I would really prefer them to be separated more but can choose that one! My husband normally leaves the lights on all night. Turn on when he gets home from work and off in the morning...not this year. I think its reasonable to just do a few hours each evening. I don't think we'll put up as many as we normally do either. Usually we line all the windows, roof, bushes, etc. Probably keep it simple this year.

Help is a safety net you have paid for sm [2008-11-21]
Food stamps are a safety net we all pay for, all forms of public assistance are things we have been paying for all along. TAKE the help you need! Do move closer to family if you possibly can. I have been in your shoes myself. I lost my home to foreclosure 4 years ago because of having a near-fatal drug interaction and losing my job of nearly 7 years. I made a couple of moves and finally ended up in a small town out of state from where I had lived for 30 years. I lived with a close friend for about 9 months and had the opportunity to buy a mobile home for $3000. The people I bought it from said I could make payments and I was able to pay it off in 5 months. It needed a lot of work and it has gotten it, most of which I have done myself. This project really helped me to regain parts of myself I had lost. It gave me a reason to get up and get going on my days off. I turned this ugly old thing into a lovely, comfortable home I cherish. I have lost about 50-60 lbs since living here and I have brought the idea of vastly cutting expenses in line with making more money. The end result is that I am very well off financially, better than in my entire life. DO get medication to help you if you can. I didn't have medication to help because I am allergic to every psychotropic in existence. I did this by pulling myself up by the boot straps, but if I could have had help, I would have. There IS a brighter future out there. You CAN have that brighter future because you DESERVE IT. That said, no one expects you to get there alone!!! Don't be embarrassed to ask and receive help. You will be able to help others later. Years ago, when my kids were young, I was a single parent, no support and it was Christmas time. My kids didn't even have adequate clothing or food. A neighbor I hardly knew handed me a Christmas card. Inside was a $100 gift card to K-Mart. She said that many years before that, she had been in my shoes and someone had given her $100 one Christmas, she was now paying this forward to me. The only provision was that I return this favor when I could, and that I bought something for myself too because I deserve nice things for my hard work. It was a turning point for me. I have been more of a giver since. Although I could have paid this back last year, I didn't know anyone who would appropriately benefit. This year, I do and I had to tell her that I was going to do this and why. She cried and felt embarrassed because, she said, she was usually in the position to give and it hurt a little to receive. I reminded her that she was GIVING me the gift of giving with pleasure. Others are going to give to you with pleasure, love, friendship and concern for your well being. TAKE IT. One day you'll post back here about how good things are and I'll want to hear it.

I had lost about 30%. in my IRA. My [2008-11-21]
broker put my money into some type of annuity where I am guaranteed not to LOSE any more money for the next year. If on my anniversary date I am below my original balance, I retain that balance. If I have acutally made a little, I do get that and then am guaranteed that amount until my next anniversary date where the same scenario occurs. It is in lower-making funds, but at least I can't lose any more.

My kids like them also but...... [2008-11-21]
They also know that money spent elsewhere is money that takes away from their gifts :). Two of the three have birthdays in December, so that makes a difference. December is a killer for me but at least I get it all knocked out at once and have another year to plan!

I usually do a lot of handmade gifts. This year each kid gets $100 they are all grown sm [2008-11-21]
I make my oldest son boxer shorts, he only likes the ones I make. My other son wanted a robe and matching PJ pants. Daughter wanted a couple of outfits and a denim jacket. My mom wanted something I had knitted up for her. Stepdad just wants to be remembered. My brother won't take anything from me, so no problem there. I will do some small things for my friends, but I won't spend $500 total, even with giving the 3 kids $100 each. I have NEVER spent that much on Christmas! I have worked like a dog all year, but I have had no time to do these things they think they want.

Just check all the ads in the newspapers. [2008-11-21]
Most stores have special coupons for early birds on Friday morning. Around here, stores open around 4 a.m. and last year we got there at 3 and stood in line in the cold just waiting to get in. Good luck. Don so unless you are first in line at those places you are usually out of luck. I know last year, people were in line at Best Buy at 2 a.m. waiting for it to open at 5.

lights [2008-11-21]
We put ours up every year. We only leave them on for about 2-3 hours a night and not every night. We do it because our kids love them.

Whatever sale item is most important to you [2008-11-21]
start there...early. Sale ads from Wednesday night's or Thursday morning's newspapers should tell you the store hours and sale hours. Many end at 11am. My dd and I like to go about an hour after stores open, though it's still dark outside. The crowds that were waiting in line overnight for the big ticket items are gone by then, and most everyone else avoids the stores until the afternoon hours, thinking they will be less crowded. Wrong they are though. There are more employees on duty early rather than later, so things move more quickly in the morning hours. We've also found the earlier crowds to be friendlier. DD starts singing Christmas carols while standing in line and soon lots of others join in. She's a blast to shop with. Then we go to a late breakfast and go home before the unfriendly crowds show up. Hope your experience is an enjoyable one.

Anyone ever do you wrong and you got [2008-11-21]
so angry you can I am stewing and no doubt making it much worse on myself, but it is hard to let it go. I went out of my way to be kind to this person on so many occasions only to be treated badly. Any advice?

How exciting for you -- sm [2008-11-21]
I My mom always drug me out an hour before the stores opened. The ads usually come out in Thursday In the past, I Get the paper and makea game plan. Some stores open an hour or 2 later than others, so you may be able to get to both in time for the specials you Wal-Mart generally has a lot of specials, especially in the toys dept. Our Wal-Mart gives you a map when you enter to tell you where each BF special is located in the store. They put some stuff in strange places -- like TVs in the meat dept, computers in dairy, etc. It Ask the Wal-Mart greeter when you enter. Our Wal-Mart is also open 24 hours, as are most, which means no waiting outside. We usually arrive an hour before the sales start so we can be in position for the item. Obviously, the most-sought after items are electronics, so be there early if you Target is 1 of my favorite places because their specials run all weekend, not just until 11 a.m. (I hope it They usually open an hour after Wal-Mart. I usually head there second because even though the specials run all weekend, they do run out of stock. Kohl The cash can be redeemed usually starting the Sunday after Black Friday. Don If there General advise: Wear comfortable shoes. Be polite to others, but don If you got there first, it Make sure you and DH have cell phones so you can communicate if you get separated. Most importantly, HAVE FUN!!!! Let us know how you make out afterwards.

Will spend about $300 for the grandkids.. [2008-11-21]
we donmetal detector, probably around $1200 and I have the same amount to do something with. We don't really buy gifts for each other but we do go away for Christmas week to a cabin in the mountains that we rent, no phone, no TV, have to drive 12 miles to get cell service. We relax, read, snowshoe, ski, bring the portable DVD player and catch up on movies, sleep late. That's our gift to each other.

breastfeeding [2008-11-21]
Breastfeeding an EIGHT YEAR OLD??That is truly not accetable - that is really gross

He is 60 years old...sm [2008-11-21]
And acts like he is 2. He doesnI am not his babysitter. He is a grown man and he needs to act like it. Social service doesn't need to help him. The man makes decent money. He just won't take responsibity to pay his bills and has too many at that. He needs to thin them out. For instance, he has 2 new model trucks. He does not need 2 trucks but he WANTS both of them. But a light bill is one of your most important bills. And I for a fact know he had the money to pay it and didn't. I even told him you better go pay that electric bill. He wouldn't. I have never seen anyone who was quite like him. I love my dad and don't want to hurt him but he is making things very hard for me right now. I can't babysit him anymore. He is more than welcome to come visit me as often as he wants. He can come by everyday if he wants. But then there is a time to leave and go home. I have a family and I know I wouldnt like it if my husbands dad did this. I would not be happy at all. I am not happy about my father doing it but what do you do? Tell him get out?

breastfeeding [2008-11-21]
My daughter weaned before she was 3, on her own.

No I live in the boonies. In Nothingville. SM [2008-11-21]
I think he has had someone for so long and my mom took care of the bill paying and he never had to worry about bills or shopping or being alone. And now he can't deal with it. They divorced because he was cheating with another woman. I told him go be with her. I mean they are divorced now. If that is what he wants go get it. He said she has a 28 year old son and a 22 year old daughter with a baby who neither one work and lay around her house. He says how am I supposed to be with someone with that kind of mess. He said if I am with her I will basically have to take on her grown kids too. I said well that is her own fault she allows her grown children to be bums. It is just a dang mess. He got himself into it though. With his bills it is like he can't sit down and say hey I can't pay for 2 vehicles and I have to get rid of one and he has other multiple bills I won't even go into. But if he is struggling to pay for both let one go back. I told him go file bankruptcy if you are having really bad problems with finanes. He said I don't want to file bankruptcy. Oh no. I said well that or lose your stuff. I have tried to give him advice and help him but he won't listen. He is stubborn.

Ewwwwwww!!!! [2008-11-21]
I couldn't watch past the first minute when she told her daughter no monkey business. That is just wrong.

the geoduck episode was so phallic -- loved it [2008-11-21]
i watch this show with my 8-year-old. he always asks me whati can not explain the double entendre tohim...

I only have one child, a son..sm [2008-11-20]
so that helps. I usually spend about $300 on my son, but this year I have spent $400 already on a playstation 3 he has wanted ever since they came out last year. I can't just give him that so I have to buy him some other little things to open. My mom and mother-in-law and sister-in-law are going to buy playstation 3 games because after spending $400 on it I can't buy the games too, which are about $60 each. So I still have to buy some small things for him so I will probably spend about $500 on my son this year. The most I have ever spent on him and he is 10. Like I said it is usually no more than $300. I try to spend no more than $100 on my husband, but this year I know he has said how he would love to have an ipod. So I am going to buy one for about $150. I have my dad to buy for and mom. I know I will probably spend about $50 on my mom. My dad I am not sure yet. In-laws are usually about $20-25 each. My sister about $25. My brother in law about $20. My 2 nephews about $20 each. I also have a niece I will spend about $20-30 on. I try to spend a little more on my niece because my sister in law spends a lot on my son. So you see I have a lot of people to buy for. I don't even know how much that is all together but it ain't cheap. And the people I buy for I have to cause they do for us.

I can just picture that hill in my mind. LOL! I think [2008-11-20]
I am going to try that this year. Great idea.

It works! [2008-11-20]
When mine were smaller they had more fun unwrapping and playing with the boxes. They are all between 12 and 17 now. I told them to count their blessings if they get Christmas dinner this year let alone presents. This year kinda stinks, but I am sure they will get a few things they each want. I always figure it out.

Our children are grown, our only grandchild is due to be [2008-11-20]
born tomorrow and we all talked about it and this year we are only going to buy 1 gift per person (except for the new grandson). So, our budget will be very small this year and, for once, I am actually not stressing about Christmas.