My son was also in scouts . . .

My son was also in scouts . . . [2008-07-03]
and we were completely exhausted trying to keep up with all of the meetings, the den meetings, the outings, etc., etc. He actually did not even learn that much from it. My daughter learned a lot more from the laid back atmosphere of girl scouts than my son did. It was too rigorous and too structured. I think boys join scouting because they think it will be fun, when in all actuality, it is a lot of work . . . don't make him do it I think you will regret it.

My sons have been in Scouts for some time now...sm [2008-07-03]
My youngest (11 years old) was in Cub Scouts for about 3 years and crossed over into a newly chartered troop. My oldest son (17 years old) joined the troop also, mostly out of necessity (we needed his warm body in order to have enough boys to charter). My youngest loves it and my oldest is kind of lukewarm about it. I have also been a leader at the pack, troop, district and council level for over 4 years now. We are basically a scouting family and love it. With that said, however, I will say that scouting is not for everyone, and everyone does not get out of scouting what is there for them to learn simply because everyone is not interested in learning those things or because of poor leadership within the scouting unit. In your case, it sounds to me as if the latter may be true. You didn't say how old your son is or how long he has been in scouting, but it sounds to me like he has a very poor leader if he makes them camp this way. Some overly self-glorified scout leaders try to turn scouting into junior Army training which is not what it is meant to be. If there is another pack or troop in the area, you might consider changing and see if that improves his scouting experience by a new leader and better camping conditions. When we camp, each boy has his own tent (can be bought at Walmart for about $15) and we always have a campfire in a designated fire ring that burns pretty much all night. Each boy is safely enclosed in his own tent that zips up which greatly reduces the chances of spiders, snakes, bugs, etc. Of course the boys have to be trained to keep their tent flaps zipped closed at all times so that nothing gets in. My advice from a scouter's viewpoint is to talk to your son and then you and your son and husband talk to the scout leader and see what can be done to improve the scouting experience for your son as well as the other boys in the unit. If the leader does not want to chanage his ways to more closely follow the scouting ideals, then find another troop or pack to join. Sounds like there is a LOT of room for improvement here. Here is a link that may help, too. http://netcommish.com/askandy.asp

and yes, they are first year Boy Scouts/campers (sm) [2008-07-03]
There is no Webelo-First Year Scout transition program or person that I am aware of.

I've been in scouts for 11 years and am a cubmaster now. [2007-05-21]
The Pinewood Derby is supposed to be a help-your-son event, but you are right to rant about some adults being overly involved. I've seen very, very sad little boys whose fathers don't let them help in building at all. Some of the things that we've done in our pack to help prevent this are: 1. Hold a Pinewood Derby building clinic(s). We get some veteran derby builders (usually dads) to come out with tools to help the boys design and build cars on a Saturday a couple of weeks before the race. Most of the work is done then, and we have stations where the boys and their adults learn about design, then how to make the axles and wheels perform better, etc. etc. By the time the clinic is over, the boys usually only have to finish painting and install their wheels. 2. We hold an adult race where there are no rules. This sometimes ends up to be quite a hilarious race. 3. Awards should be given in lots of different categories that have nothing to do with how well a car performs on the track. If you think that these ideas would be helpful to your pack, why not join the Pinewood Derby Committee for next year to help plan and have more of a say. Usually packs are dying for volunteers to help out.

My brothers were in Cub Scouts [2007-05-20]
and did pinewood derbys. My Dad helped and so did I actually. I think it is supposed to be a family event, but I It does give some cars the upper hand when family members help, but it was actually encouraged in Cub Scouts.

My sons are 18 and 20. [2008-11-04]
One lives at college and the other is living at home while attending college. When they were both at home and under 18 I had the same rules as you, basically. During the week, except for their activity obligations of school, sports, scouts, they didnhang out time. It did help that their high school was in the next county, and most of their school friends lived some distance away. When girlfriends came along, life was a little different. My oldest dated a girl who lived down the street. My youngest dated a girl who lived a good 30-minute drive away. Lucky for me, their parents had the same rules for hanging out. It was pretty much weekends only. My boys accepted it all in stride. But I have to say that I've been pretty strict about their attitude all of their lives. Since they first began to speak, they learned not to give attitude to their parents. In return, we always treated them with respect. The few times that they did raise their voices as teenagers, our conversation came to an end, and their requests were denied with no chance for a reversal of that decision. Worked nicely. But, again, I have to say we were very lucky in that most of their friends weren't right in our neighborhood and their girlfriends had the same rules. The payoff is that now as responsible young adults, they've developed a good work ethic. Even my son living at college does well managing his free time, and will be an RA in his dorm next year, partly because he's shown maturity and isn't goofing off at college. (And I'm glad not to have to pay all of the room and board! Hooray!)

Help. I have made my own prison. Please make suggestions sm [2008-10-24]
I will try to make this brief. I have marital problems, husband is gone all the time. I came to work at home again because I have no help with our children. I need to be here if they are sick and be here when they get home from school. But I have become once again socially isolated (I did this type of work for years and had a job outside of the home and enjoyed it, except for the fact that my children did not get enough attention, so I quit). I do have friends but I don I used to walk several miles a day but never do that anymore, have gained weight, eat junk food, stay on the computer too long. I am constantly busy. I still do volunteer work with my children - Scouts, church, etc., but I am so overwhelmed. My husband is almost never here. It almost feels more like he comes to visit us sometimes than actually lives here, but I need his help financially and my son is very afraid for me to get a divorce (long story, but he is afraid he would have to live part-time with his dad, and they are not close). I have debt that my husband doesn But he won When I tell him I need more money he tells me things like, turn off the cable TV or don The thing is he spends lots and lots of money on entertaining himself. He makes 3 x as much as I do (or maybe 4 by now). I have not been allowed to open his mail for years and we pretty much never talk. I have started to allow things to pile up, mail around my desk, weight around my middle, clutter here and there. I just feel like a big slug. I am tired much of the time. In reading this I sound depressed but I am already taking an antidepressant which I started a few years ago because of my marriage.I love my children so dearly but I am afraid of leaving and disrupting their lives. If I left I would at least get my part of the equity in ourhome, etc., and maybe have a chance at having a life again. Anyway, I know this is long and rambling and jumbled, but I just woke up, from another night of poor sleep. Please suggest what you would do. Thanks

which is better? Divorce or stay for kids? (sm) [2008-09-11]
My husband and I are trying to decide which is better, to get a divorce or to stay in a loveless, sexless marriage. He is bitter a majority of the time. I am depressed because of the marriage. But we are able to function and so far the kids are doing well. They do well in school, are social, involved in Scouts and church, no behavioral or emotional issues. I say if we can do this right and divorce with as little trauma as possible, we can keep the kids happy. He says we should just stay together like we are, which is not having sex for the past 3 years but him asking for it daily, and being bitter every day when I say no. There have been a lot of terrible things that have gone on between him and me, and we have been to several marriage counsellors. I know I will never want to be sexual with him again, because when he touches me, it feels like poison, and no matter how hard I try, I haven yet he asks me every day, usually via email. Which is worse?

I wish everyone was like you - see message inside [2008-08-24]
I wish everyone would protest the marketing of Christmas. I think itmaking money off of Jesus. Especially when they make as much money if they put out decorations the day after Thanksgiving like its been done for years and years. I can't tell you how infuriated I get and my blood pressure rises thinking about this. I'm not a Christian (and I'm not an Athiest), but all I can think of is - Is this what Jesus would want, people to make money off of me? Growing up we celebrated Christmas. Got all the fun gifts like slinkies, easy bake oven, Lite Brite, barbie dolls, etc, but nothing like I-pods, computers, XBox (you know all the $300 a pop gifts) and we considered ourselves very very lucky. For us we celebrated Christmas mostly for the spiritual reasons (not marketing). My sister and I were in girl scouts and we did a lot to help the less fortunate, and I remember on at least 3 occasions (maybe more, but I remember 3) we went through all our toys and clothes and all the stuff we didn't play with anymore that were still in good condition were rounded up and given to a home that a lot of kids lived at (it might have been an orphanage but I don't remember) - I just remember wrapping up our toys and giving them to the kids and they were so thankful and happy. I really wish more people would walk out of a store without buying anything at the stores that decide to start marketing Jesus before Thanksgiving.

good ideas! [2008-08-21]
and less cleanup which is always a pain without a dishwasher. lol I wonder if there is a scouting cookbook...there probably is. I think I will look up under scouts too and i bet that will give some good camping ideas for kids activities too. Thanks!

What are your favorite childhood memories [2008-08-15]
Watching the kids in the neighborhood play takes me back to my childhood days. Lots of people say they would never go through childhood ever again but I would in a heartbeat. I Mine were 1. Playing all day and night on weekends and after school. My only concern was getting in the house before dark (or by supper time). 2. Grandma Grandpa lived up the road so spent lots of time with them (they taught us how to do the polka to Lawrence Welk). 3. Didn Everything was prepared for me. And, no laundry. Always had clean clothes hanging in the closet. 4. School. Learning, learning, learning and being with friends. 5. Being free enough to have imaginary friends and nobody would tell me I was losing my mind (or were they really imaginary????) 6. Girl Scouts (need I say any more). 7. The idea that I could be a ballerina, movie star, singer, or anything I wanted to be when I grew up and my parents entertained that as though it could become a real possibility for me. 8. Mom and dad tucking me into bed and kissing me good night. 9. Thanksgiving with the whole family over. 10. Best Christmas gifts were Lite Bright, Easy Bake Oven, Feely-meely, Incredible Edibles, Frisbee, Slinky, dolls, and anything that was not mechanical or electrical. 11. Ice skating,sledding parties, and slumbar parties. 12. Being innocent enough to not know about all the kooks and problems in the world while I had the protection of mom and dad always. Well I could think of a ton of things, but those were the best times of my life. What are yours?

Well....I think I think things through more carefully next time (sm) [2008-08-07]
You should have seen that issue coming a mile away with the PTO...and having a coup to get rid of the old PTO...good grief. I volunteer at lot with school, Girl Scouts, etc. I hate the pettiness that some people have about it. No way would I have taken that position with as much work/responsibility as you have plus all the chaos surrounding it and you are all neighbors - no way in heck would I have gotten in the middle of that. I lived between two feuding neighbors for years and never got in the middle of it, somehow managed to get along amicably with both until one finally moved. Anyway...I would step down. Absolutely step down, just say you have too much going on, sorry. About the neighbor copying you and your kid...again, I'm sorry, but you are being petty again. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Maybe she just doesn't have much confidence in her own choices but thinks you make good ones. Just get over it. I mean really, I'm sorry but in the big picture, you are causing your own unnecessary stress. You have put yourself in a little mental prison...get yourself out of it.

Ew [2008-07-05]
Open tents? I've never seen that! My brother loved being in the boy scouts. Loved the winter camping in frigid WI. His back pack almost weighed as much as he did. No camp fire? What kind of camping is that?? I think you are right that it is the kind of camping they are doing that's the problem. I've heard that boyscouts are not allowed bug spray, which is bad enough! I also found the girlscout meetings and all the crafts and badges really boring. I only stayed in for the camping, but ours was in lodges when it was cold or in normal tents. (I preferred the lodges!) There is no shame in the boys not enjoying this kind of camping. It's a shame it's being done like that. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDGCg037kC4

My son was also in scouts . . . [2008-07-03]
and we were completely exhausted trying to keep up with all of the meetings, the den meetings, the outings, etc., etc. He actually did not even learn that much from it. My daughter learned a lot more from the laid back atmosphere of girl scouts than my son did. It was too rigorous and too structured. I think boys join scouting because they think it will be fun, when in all actuality, it is a lot of work . . . don't make him do it I think you will regret it.

My sons have been in Scouts for some time now...sm [2008-07-03]
My youngest (11 years old) was in Cub Scouts for about 3 years and crossed over into a newly chartered troop. My oldest son (17 years old) joined the troop also, mostly out of necessity (we needed his warm body in order to have enough boys to charter). My youngest loves it and my oldest is kind of lukewarm about it. I have also been a leader at the pack, troop, district and council level for over 4 years now. We are basically a scouting family and love it. With that said, however, I will say that scouting is not for everyone, and everyone does not get out of scouting what is there for them to learn simply because everyone is not interested in learning those things or because of poor leadership within the scouting unit. In your case, it sounds to me as if the latter may be true. You didn't say how old your son is or how long he has been in scouting, but it sounds to me like he has a very poor leader if he makes them camp this way. Some overly self-glorified scout leaders try to turn scouting into junior Army training which is not what it is meant to be. If there is another pack or troop in the area, you might consider changing and see if that improves his scouting experience by a new leader and better camping conditions. When we camp, each boy has his own tent (can be bought at Walmart for about $15) and we always have a campfire in a designated fire ring that burns pretty much all night. Each boy is safely enclosed in his own tent that zips up which greatly reduces the chances of spiders, snakes, bugs, etc. Of course the boys have to be trained to keep their tent flaps zipped closed at all times so that nothing gets in. My advice from a scouter's viewpoint is to talk to your son and then you and your son and husband talk to the scout leader and see what can be done to improve the scouting experience for your son as well as the other boys in the unit. If the leader does not want to chanage his ways to more closely follow the scouting ideals, then find another troop or pack to join. Sounds like there is a LOT of room for improvement here. Here is a link that may help, too. http://netcommish.com/askandy.asp

This one has struck a chord with me. [2008-07-03]
I have been an assistant scoutmaster for 8 years now. Yes, I am a mom, and there are women scout leaders out there! My job with our troop was Webelos-to-Scout Transition Coordinator. My job was to help our youngest boys and their families become part of our troop and to make sure that the boys have fun and get all that they can from the scout experience. Summer camp was always the make or break time for the youngest boys. You didn't say if your son is a new scout, but I assume this is his first time at summer camp. Homesickness and living in the outdoors are always the biggest hurdles during the first summer camp. You are not over-reacting because your son is having a bad time. That's a simple fact, and he deserves to have those feelings validated and addressed. Since I'm female, I tend to approach the first-time scout's misery in a different way, and over the years, a lot of men have disagreed with my methods. But, they work. Men seem to like the stick-it-out approach, and I've seen some of the worst leaders actually tease and belittle homesick boys or boys who don't take easily to the outdoor experience. That really finishes off the boy for scouting. He quits. Do you think that is what is happening with your son? At summer camp with our first year scouts, I always listen to them, validate their fears, and then try to help them overcome their fears with knowledge. If spiders or animals scare them, we go to the nature lodge and find out all about them. We do a good cleaning of their tents or lean-toWell, it I and my fellow adult leaders have spent a lot of nights sitting around picnic tables talking to scouts, sometimes making a game of listening for owls or watching spiders crawl across the table in the lantern light. And if boys do call home, I would run like crazy to the camp phone to call the parents first to let them know what was going on and to tell them to expect a call from their son. In that way, parents were prepared, and we could coordinate our efforts to help their son. Basically, it just takes some compassion. The hard core approach doesn't work. Why do I go through all the trouble? Because I know the value of the scouting program. When it's done well, it goes a long way to help parents raise up honorable men. In our troop, our scouts learn to be compassionate, because we've modeled that sort of behavior for them. They learn about living in the outdoors, and learn to take care of themselves and others. That gives them a sense of accomplishment and makes them feel capable. They learn problem-solving skills and teamwork. These are all important life skills, and when scouting is done well, boys who come through are lightyears ahead of most of their non-scout peers by the time they are 18. But that only happens when it's done right. There are great troops and adult volunteers in the BSA, but there are unfortunately some real losers, as well. It's true that scouting is not for everyone, but there is no reason for so many boys to be pushed away because of issues that just need a little careful thought and attention. This is one of my most passionate issues with scouting. Even the BSA knows that the first year scout is the most likely to quit, and they spend a lot of money and time training volunteers on this subject. It seems that some adults don't learn as quickly as others, though. And there is a core of leaders who like to remember what it was like when they were boy scouts, and won't move ahead or adapt their techniques for the boy of today's times. A new 11-year-old scout should not be expected to act like a man and tough it out. He's still a boy, and living in the woods is usually a totally new experience for him. MOST boys are scared at first, but the men and other boys hate to admit it. A new scout just needs some patience, understanding and time to mature. He needs to feel safe even when he's struggling, and he needs to know that he is supported. I don't know all the details of your son's experience, but if you think that what I've said might apply to him, you might consider looking for another troop, one that will provide him with a good, supportive program. Not all scout troops are the same. Each has a different personality, so perhaps another troop would suit your son better. If that's not possible, or if at this point he is completely turned off by scouting, there are certainly other activities out there that can teach him the things that are learned through scouting. Encourage him to find out what his talents are and help him to explore all of the possibilities that life has to offer. I'm so sorry to hear that your son is not enjoying scouts. It really breaks my heart when I hear such stories, because I know that the adult volunteers could handle the situation better. My own sons had a hard time the first time they went to camp, which is why I got involved. I knew there was a better way to deal with such a common problem. My oldest, who is now 20, still works with scouts, and my youngest will receive his Eagle Scout rank in just a couple of weeks. I have seen many, many boys' lives changed for the better by the scouting program, including my own sons. I hope that your son can also have a great experience in scouting. I'm always happy to talk about scouting, and if you'd like to send me a private message, I'd be glad to share more of my thoughts on the subject.

thanks for your reply (please see msg) [2008-07-03]
I hope you don't mind, but I just pasted your answer and sent it to my husband - he is staying the last two nights of the campout and will get my email that is printed out by the staff at the camp facility. I also know that the leaders read the emails before distributing them and I thought your answer was awesome! I want my son to enjoy scouting, not be miserable. If he is going to be miserable, I would rather he not do it at all. I am a Brownie leader for my daughter and have a full-time job so I don't feel I can dedicate a lot of time to Boy Scouts as well but I think I am going to tell my husband and the other leaders that if things do not change, and my husband insists on making my son go to the campouts, I will be going as well.

I don't mind at all that you sent my email along. [2008-07-03]
There is plenty of training material available to scout leaders on the transition period and how to help the boys stay in scouting. There are videos, training sessions run by people like me, written material, etc. It's out there. It's just hard to get it through some of the leaders' brains that the boys need to be treated like boys in transition, and not like army recruits. I really applaud you for being willing to go out on the trips with the troop. That is also a hard thing to do with so many men around. I looked very carefully when my boys were crossing over to scout troops. We are fortunate in our area to have many troops to choose from. We found a great troop headed by mostly even-thinking adults who had no problem with a woman joining them. It's not perfect, and every now and then, some sexist fool says or does something stupid, but nothing is ever insurmountable in that regard. Know that having women leaders is a unit option, which means that the chartering organization can decide that no girls are allowed, so to speak. This is sometimes done for religious reasons. Other times it's just sort of a tacit tradition. I didn't have to overcome that issue, and in fact, when it was discovered that I had been camping all my life and was an avid solo backpacker, I got the job of teaching the boys about backpacking, too. Our troop welcomed all volunteers who were willing to be trained and who could commit to helping the boys. I do hope it works out for your son. If you do join as a leader, be sure that you take advantage of all the training opportunities available to you. Your troop should have a training coordinator or advancement chair who knows when training is offered. (By the way, are the adult leaders of this troop fully trained? That's VERY important.) As a GSUSA leader, you should understand the value of training. The Girl Scouts really do a great job of requiring leaders to be trained. BSA councils and districts, however, sometimes vary on how strict they are on training requirements. Don't be afraid to help out. You're doing this for your son, and that really is a great motivator. And what's really cool is that most of us start out wanting to help our own sons, but in the process we help so many other boys and parents along the way. Good luck!

I get it oh so well!!!!!!....... [2008-05-28]
My mother didnYou still on that computer, you don....and, Did I just knock you off the computer when I called? Well, if she thinks she would knock me off the computer, then why call anyway? She knows I am available if there is an emergency, but she doesnstuff, things my brother and I would never thought of having. I never asked for any money because all I heard was I don't have it. We would have just liked to have her acknowledge our presence. She made an effort to give my brother swimming lessons, boy scouts, etc., but never and I mean NEVER signed me up for anything. I had plenty of friends from the neighborhood and I played sports since I was small and this was because many of my girlfriend's older brothers paid my softball registration, etc., to allow me to play for their church teams. I am grateful to them to this day. My mother never and I mean NEVER came to one thing I ever did. Not one game, not one thing at school, nothing, and that is NO exaggeration. Living away, I just let things slide when she called. I would sit and let her talk for hours just to get things off her chest but I drew the line when she forgot who she was talking to one day and said about my niece, ******** feels more like a daughter than ****(insert my name here), then she nearly choked when remembered it was her daughter she was talking to. Who the *** does she think spent all the time taking care of her business, listening to her whine for hooouuurs about this and that, and taking care of things for my brother that really wasn't my place, but I did. I haven't felt the same since. She would rather my niece and nephew do everything for her now that they are grown... her golden children. Of course, they should feel like her children more than my brother and myself....she certainly spent time with them like she should have spent with us but didn't. I came home one year and she didn't have time to be with her other grandchildren (my children), she had to attend my niece's softball game...and she went to all of her practices. That just blew me away!!! She would sit on the bleachers and constantly complain how wrong they were treating her baby....they didn't pitch the ball right for her, didn't give her an opportunity, blah, blah, blah. I just canYaShe. No, she's tired of you telling her at age 29 what she needs to do and how to do it. Her and her husband go out of town nearly every weekend all over the place, taking vacations here and there. I have several pets and guess what? I had to feed them right along with my children, all the time still having to work. Big deal!!! She never once inquired how I was feeling during my pregnancies. Too busy playing mom to my brotherI bought it for (niece) but she is just sooo small and petite, so I thought you might be able to wear it but you. My daughter was never fat, so that hurt terribly. My nephew has mooched off her and is now 27 years old and she constantly gives him money for his debt he gets himself into, even with his great paying job. ItWell, (niece) said I could probably do it without all that. Well, my niece couldn't even do this job, but it's always good to know how little they think of me. My two children are college graduates and when they look at some of the stuff I do, they cringe at the thought. My daughter is a teacher and says she would rather teach those unruly kids all day than have to deal with my work. So, itmother thing. Some people just don't realize that all mothers do not really mother....but as they age, they suddenly think you should be available now that they have nothing else to do. You're right, it really is frustrating. My husband said a long time ago I should just not pick up the phone because I feel physically ill when I see that number come up on my phone. Such hateful comments and snide remarks. I can't feel happy living here and have wanted to move since we moved back here, but my children are grown and work here now, so I would like to be around for my grandbabies. Oh well......anyway, I do get it!!

You sound like an excellent parent [2008-05-11]
I do not have any children, but having grown up with parents who sound just like you I am grateful for what they did for me. I didn't have what every other kid had and I had to earn what I did get. We were involved in girl scouts and my mom was the leader of our troop. She was involved in everything we did and she did not believe in using activities as a babysitter. For babysitting she hired a girl down the road. So I am grateful to have the parents I had (mom's gone but dad is still alive). They instilled values in me and if I ever had kids I would raise them the same exact way my parents raised me. So good for you and I know when your kids are grown with kids of their own they'll remember what you did for them and will be thankful to you. I wish more parents were like you (my sister could take some lessons for sure - but that's a whole nother post).

All I can think of are - [2008-04-17]
Umbrella (small collapsable one) Underwear (LOL) Maybe a toy unicorn Map of United States (cut out shape)??? Utensil - (fork, knife, etc.) - but being cub scouts don't know if they would know that word U is a hard word to think of if you want actual objects.

I think my husband and I were. sm [2008-04-15]
We thought it was being an involved parent. We knew her teachers (yes, she is an only child). We were band boosters, went to all of the games and concerts. I was the cookie mom a few times for the Girl Scouts. We stayed on her to do well in school because our state had college scholarships that could give her a free college educations. She graduated with honors, started her freshman year in college. We wanted her to live at home to save money, the college is in town. She lasted 1 semester, and during Christmas break, she said she wanted to go west to visit a girlfriend. Once there, she decided to stay there, met a young man she had talked to on the phone for about a month before Christmas, got engaged, and got married within 3 weeks of meeting him face to face. She said she needed to grow up on her own, wanted to be independent. Needless to say, her dad and I are devastated, but are keeping the lines of communication open, because we love our daughter. We thought we were being good parents. However, our priest advised us, just because we had a plan for her, doesn't mean she had the same plan for herself. She plans on going back to school, but she just needed a break. I just wish she hadn't eloped. Well, that's my helicopter parent story.

I'm with you. [2008-02-19]
I have never tolerated backtalk from my children, no eye rolling, no whatever, etc. My sons are 20, 18 and 17, and they never talk back to me. I loved having teens in the house. There were never any major conflicts, because we all spoke respectfully to each other. There were arguments and disagreements, to be sure, but never disrespect. I have had a lot of their friends in my house over the years, and as a scout leader, IUgh! Go home kid! But I have actually learned that that is not the best solution. I establish rules and keep at it with the kids. If they truly have incorrigible attitudes, yep, I send them along their way. But I've only had to do that two or three times over the years (Each time it was the same kid who is now a mess at age 20, btw). For the most part, though, mouthy kids in my home or under my supervision in scouts will push back a few times when I impose the rules. But after that, they generally settle into the rules and go along. As they behave more and more like gentlemen, they find that they receive more and more from me in terms of respect, interest in what they are doing, what they are thinking, etc. etc. Lots of those kids who behave like completely honorable young men in my presence are still horrible to their parents. And in front of their parents, I will correct them for it. The parents will comment, Why does he behave for you but not for me? Because I INSIST that they behave, and you can, too! Grow parental backbone. So, Isave him, but there's no reason to write him off, at least not at first! If, however, he keeps at the disrespect and never shows signs of controlling himself, by all means send him home. You certainly don't have to put up with that sort of thing. But if he never has any example of how decent, respectful people behave, he'll never be any better. If you have the patience for it, you can only be a good influence in these sorts of situations. There are big payoffs down the road. My kids are now old enough and mature enough to say to me, You did the right thing, mom! And that is priceless.

home school project. [2008-01-11]
I did this with my Cub Scouts and it went like gangbusters. LOL. First of all, get a big plastic drop cloth, you will need it for clean up. Then get a bulk sized box of Rice Krispy treats or something similar and decorations like sprinkles, colored sugar, nonpareils, etc. and some vanilla or chocolate frosting either in tubes or tubs or maybe some colored frosting tubes, and let them decorate to their little hearts content. You have just killed two birds with one stone. LOL. A project and a snack. My scouts thought it was the most fun they had ever had.

Opinion needed regarding Eagle Scout Award [2008-01-02]
My nephew is receiving his Eagle Scout Award on Saturday. Are we suppose to give him a gift of some sort? I told my mother that I did notthink so since he had a lot of donations from our town. What is your opinion? In case anyone is curious for his project he beautified the VFW Hall in his town by planting a memorial garden. I am always impressed with boys who stickwith scouts until the age of 18.

A gift is a very nice gesture. [2008-01-02]
It doesnformer Eagle Scout, or in the past tense, as in, He was an Eagle Scout. If he lives to be 100, he IS an Eagle Scout his entire life. This is quite an accomplishment for someone his age. I usually give small but meaningful gifts. Something patriotic-themed, a framed picture of him taken during a scouting activity, or a donation to his scout troop made in his name are all nice.

OP ABOUT ES AWARD sm [2008-01-02]
Thanks for your input. I definitely will get him a gift. I will go to the area Scouting stores and see what I can find. I know it is a great accomplishment.He has three older brothers and he is the only one that did scouting. He was never that good in sports so martial arts and scouting was his passion.My daughters were in Girl Scouts until about 7th grade. I think an Eagle Scout Award holds more clout than a Girl Scout Award. My daughters have dated some guys who had gotten Eagle Scout awards and they were so nice and very polite and I came right out and told them how impressive I was that they were 18 and still in scouting even though they took their teasing from others.

Not sure I've seen much in your neck of the woods [2007-12-07]
went to some sort of juvenile detention place when I was in college - may have camped close by with girl scouts - but since I have been here Morehead has become a major metropolitan area - should have seen it when I got here!

Credit for your daughter [2007-11-27]
As DW stated, federal loans are given to students - have her go to financial aid office/web site of school and see what she needs to do to apply for them. Does your daughter have a credit card? Yeah, I know, scary thought, but the sooner they can establish good credit, the better off you all are. My son has a card for college students from Citi Bank. He's had it since senior year of high school and I tell him to use it for EVERYTHING. Gas, pizza, books at school, etc. He keeps track (amazingly) and pays the card off every month so he never gets charged interest. His bill is usually for under $50. He's been having problems with his cell phone, it's already been fixed once, yet the same problem keeps happening. The contract for the phone was up last week which means he could get a new phone for next to nothing provided he renew for another two years. I told him I'd buy him he new phone for a Christmas present. I've been paying his cell bill of $45/month for years. He wanted text messaging added to his plan. I told him I will only pay the $45, he can pay the difference if he wants to text his friends because NWIHAIPFI so he can ask his BFF what time they can meet for lunch when he could just call the dude and leave a message if he isn't there! Well, a two-year commitment with the phone company would bring us to 6 months AFTER he graduates from college and he could be in Madagascar by then for all I know with the cell bill still coming to me. I asked the cell phone company if the contract can go in my son's name. They told me no, because his credit rating as a student wouldn't qualify him. I asked them to check anyway. They did, the woman was shocked, he was approved, and now he has a new contract with text messaging for $10 more and the bill goes to him! I'll deposit $45 in his checking acct every month and he can write the check. This is partial payback for the night I had to spend in a battleship with 400+ other Cub Scouts and their fathers when my son was little. Hot dogs and beans was the dinner. Need I say more? Bunks stacked 5 high with me on the top bunk and hot air rises. He will owe me for that for many years to come.

Sad state of children [2007-10-05]
Good for the boys who have been guided under your scout leadership. They will truly have a gift to pass on to their children some day. My boys are 8 and 10, both cub scouts, the oldest crossing over at the end of this year. Most of the boys at school feel that scouting is just for those who are not popular and laugh at it. Fortunately, my oldest son is assertive enough to smile and let them know that he is proud and feels fortunate to belong to scouts, even stating that some day he hopes to be an Eagle Scout who will become President. He has learned so much from scouting--including the true meaning of RESPECT and practices it on those who do not even deserve it. We have to keep plugging away to keep these values in our children, so many kids are lost with parents who are lost. Thank you for your years of dedication and teaching....maybe with one child at a time we can turn this sad trend around.