Need your opinions please

I differ in my opinions - sm [2008-11-11]
Everyone has limitations and personal problems,including those with high IQ. When we examine those on the other end of the scale, the mentally challenged, many of them seem very happy, and easily contented with the simple things in life. Its because they are able to concentrate on that one thing and enjoy it. Often the rest of us are too distracted by what The smarter one is, the more easily they can identify what is wrong with a situation, so perhaps the more problems they see the more they tend to be distracted by worries, etc. and cannot enjoy the simple things in life. Alcoholism? The tendency to that type of escapism is inheritable. Wise people that know it runs in their family will never indulge at all. But smart doesn In fact,smart often leads to arrogance, which leads to risk taking. You can also wonder how smart people can smoke, gamble, vote the way they do, whatever. These behaviors may be unwise, but they don Guess what my ex said to me - I have so many more brain cells than most people, I can afford to kill half of them off and STILL be smarter than you. Gee, I wonder why I divorced him... I knew a brilliant guy (not my ex) that I posed your question regarding self-destruction. He claimed it was his brain, and his right to waste it, or not,as he saw fit. I suppose it will be between him and his maker to discuss whether or not it is a sin to do so. I don Nobody blames my ex They lose the respect of people that had high hopes for them, yes, the definitely do. Their future looks really dismal. But they can still run rings around us in calculus, even three-sheets-to-the-wind. Aggravating as heck, but oh well, I am one that believes that if a person wants to trash their life, its between them and God. But as I told my ex, when judgement day comes, he'll have some explaining to do, and I wouldn't want to be his his shoes.

His opinions should not matter to you really (sm) [2008-10-29]
Everyone has opinions - what do you care what his are? Move past it - you cannot change him or his opinions - don't let his words get to you - then he wins. Move on. And don't answer the phone anymore when he calls!

For example, I have a lot of opinions and beliefs....do you want to send your child (or another chil [2008-10-16]
and let me tell them what I think is right and wrong and teach them however I see fit? Or do you think the child's parents have that right?

it is wonderful to see how many people have such strong opinions about people in debt. [2008-08-23]
I thought that the purpose of this board was to be able to post without being judged unfairly or have somebody tell you how wonderful their personal life is, and therefore you are causing their life to be less wonderful with your irresponsibility. Well, the saying walk a mile in my shoes is a good one in this case. Since you have no personal information about the person you are lambasting because they are looking for information on their debt, you can feel superior. Had you had personal information about them, you might act in a more human manner. Consider fighting cancer for 4 years, working and being debilitated while you do, suffering the effects of chemo, going into debt to maintain your home for your children and looking for a way out of debt SHOULD YOU EVEN LIVE THROUGH THIS!! Thank you for the kind comments. To the judgmental people I say please take a step back before you judge. You do not know who you are talking to and if you knew the personal information maybe your comments would be kinder.

not you again....we can all have opinions... [2008-08-22]
remember free speech? This is my opinion. Why the bitterness towards me? One would think you were jealous or a stalker....

want opinions - would you let your 16 YO daughter - sm [2008-07-06]
go camping overnight with a bunch of boys not far from home, doing nothing wrong, blah, blah, blah....but still....my instinct is to say no. Just wonder what the rest of the world thinks. Thanks.

want opinions - [2008-07-06]
Been there with my daughter - follow your instincts. I said yes but way later found it was not so innocent. Wish I had followed my instinct! Even though she was safe and had a blast, it opened the door to a life style I wish she had not traveled.

Sex offender wins Lotto jackpot - opinions? [2008-06-20]
Should he be allowed to keep it?

Is my anger justified? Opinions welcomed [2008-06-04]
Here My ex-sorta-sister-in-law shares a child with my brother. They both have DUIs and neither one of them can drive. They only call me when they need help getting their child (who is the same age as mine and attends the same school) picked up after school and delivered to either one of them. I own a home in the city, a pretty bad neighborhood, and I happened upon this magnificent house very near her house, in the correct school district. This house is on a dead-end dirt road surrounded only by trees and nature. Truly the perfect house for me. So, here She needed me to pick her up and then go pick up her child after school. On the way of returning them home, I said to her, Oh, Sue, let me show you my dream home.I drive her past it, saying how I so want this house and I She says, Wow, that would be perfect for me and my family (she has three other kids, having had this child with my brother while having an affair outside her marriage). Well, sure enough, at the open house on Sunday, there she was with her four kids and her her toothless husband -- making plans for who gets which room.I told herI was less than pleased that she was trying to snatch my dream,when her husband stated, Whoever gets to the bank first gets it. My feeling is that she was outof line. There are thousands of houses for sale in this town and I had displayed extreme interest in this one. Sure, itone Now, when she calls me tonightasking to deliver her child again, I really feel like I She obviously has noregardfor me. Am I right to be so miffed?

It is not my fault others get offended at my opinions [2008-04-11]
x

Air Purifier opinions... [2008-04-07]
Does anyone here own an air purifier? I am getting desperate for a solution. My BF suffers miserably with allergies, constantly sneezing, coughing, red, watery eyes. He says it is a lot worse when he comes home, so obviously there is something in our home environment that is contributing to this. I have just started researching air purifiers, but some of them seem quite costly! However, if they do indeed work, then it would be worth the investment. Would love to hear from anyone with personal experience with these and any recommendations you may have. Thanks!

Need your opinions please [2008-03-08]
Okay MTs, here Made an appointment at American Glasses ended up costing me over $250.00! When I picked them up one pair was broken! They fixed on the spot – I took them home – cannot wear either pair, as they give me a headache. I had a feeling they wouldnto me. First off he tried to tell me there were special contract lens that would allow me to and I quote see my dreams clearly. Okay – dreams are a brain function. You do not need prescription eye wear to see dreams! And in my opinion he violated HIPAA. While I was in the waiting area between testing for field vision etc. He informed me in front of others waiting in that same area of my tests results. My results are my business not any other patients in the waiting room. Anyway, I returned today to return the glasses for my money back – they advertise a 30-day return. They gave me nothing but grief. Only refunded me for $147.00 when I paid over $200.00 plus I had to pay for that advertised free eye exam (which I understand since I didn I’m livid. Iflipping ******didn Both glasses were supposed to be the same prescription yet one pair I could see distance somewhat okay, but got headaches/dizzy – the other pair – useless couldn I paid extra for coatings for anti-glare that I don Please don Others were in the same store when I was trying to get my money back for the same reasons. Anyway – long story short – did the eye doctor violate HIPAA in your opinions? My tests were okay – but that was my business. And if you believe he violated me . . . where do I report him? I’m sick of being taken advantage of by places like this. Thanks. I Oh—did I mention when he dilated my eyes (3 drops) they stayed that way not for hours but entire day! My eyes burned and I wasnback to normal for a week. I

I agree with your feelings and opinions. [2008-02-19]
I LIKE MIKE, too. Wish he had a snowball.

Ahhh, well, opinions are like... [2008-02-05]
I'm sure you can finish that one.... Rude, I may be, but not obsessive about celebs' lives. That's gotta count for something. In my mind it does, that's for sure. Don't you have any sympathy/empathy for these people having their private lives just torn apart? They can't even go out to eat, go to a public restroom, drive down the street, without being pestered. It killed Lady Di, which I'm sure you were plastered to the screen and news on that one too, and probably would have been there had you been able....what's one more obsessed fan to follow someone? So call me rude, but I'm a happy rude person who has more to worry about than what the Jones' are up to!

Would like opinions about a school/teacher [2008-01-22]
Just looking for outside viewpoints about this scenario: A child with autism, so perception issues, believes that his teacher hates him and the teacher is aware of this. So, a couple of weeks after discussion with the teacher, she states to the class, You know what I hate about ______ (insert child When he acts like I

You ask for opinions and then you say should know better? [2008-01-21]
NM

I wish they'd make a board for ESL/illegal alien opinions so I can avoid it. [2008-01-20]
x

Opinions about school suspension? [2008-01-14]
My son went to his first class this morning and then I met him at the doctor He told me that a girl in his class had been suspended for something she posted on a blog.She had called one of her teachers a B--ch on a blog. This was done on her home computer. Someone saw it, printed it, and then gave it to the teacher. She was given 5 days home suspension and 5 days inschool suspension. This was definately done from her home computer and not at school because she was complaining about how long a particular homework assignment was taking. I in no way think this is acceptable behavior, but I am not sure I believe the school was right either. If it were my child then I would certainly want the school to notify me and I would gladly come in and talk with them but then I think I should be the one to hand out the punishment. If this takes place in my home I don Others may disagree and that is why I would like opinions. It may make me feel differently if I heard others views. Once again, this is not my child, just a classmate of his so I really don Would just like to know how to handle a situation like this if it ever happened in my family. Thanks.

This isn't a problem, but I would like some opinions [2008-01-07]
My DH best friendShe was 89yrs old. She fell and broke her hip about a month ago and just went downhill after that. For the past week and a half the family has known is was just a matter of time. This lady still lived alone. She lost her husband about 20 years ago. They had 13 children and of course multiple grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and 5 great-great-grandchildren. We went to the funeral home last night and most all of the family was totally falling apart. Several of her children had to be medicated. My DH Both his parents are still living and while he was close with his grandmother she didn So many of the people kept saying to me i know you know exactly how this feels. Well, honestly my mother dropped dead of a heart attack at age 59. Please don I really do care about and love these people. Our church is feeding the family (about 100)before the funeral so I have spent all morning cooking. I am also going to keep the nursery during the funeral. I know it is painful to lose a parent no matter what the age, but when my grandmother died at the age of 93 we looked at the funeral as more of a a celebration of her life. Has anyone ever experienced something like this? I want to get ina better frame of mind before I go to the funeral. Like I said, I really do feel compassion for this family but don Our church sermon yesterday was titled I know where I am going and I did keep saying that last night because I have no doubt she is now in heaven, but I feel like everything I say sounds hollow because I can Please don't flame me, just want to know what I can do to help.

Opinions on bipolar medications [2007-12-17]
My child was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder and is unable to take Depakote due to side effects from the drug. We now have to decide on a different medication to try. There are so many out there, and all have some bad side effects. We have several options, but are just unsure which one to choose. I was wondering if anyone out there has bipolar disorder or a child who has it, and if so, what medication(s) you have opinions on, pros and cons. TIA!

High school yearbook article - opinions please...sm [2007-12-12]
Hello, Our daughter is on the yearbook staff for her high school. Tonight she showed us the picture they made of the yearbook staff and I commented that one of the students looked very upset and depressed. She said that she I told my daughter that I was mortified that they think it is acceptable....especially in this day and time where another student may see/hear her rantings and if they I'm also concerned about this student not being happy and they're just letting her write about it. Do you think I should be concerned and should express my concerns to the yearbook advisor or just leave it to the advisor to use good judgement and accept the windfall if there is any after this is published?

We all have opinions...you don't have to explain yourself to the world (sm) [2007-12-11]
I'm sorry you are getting bashed. I did disagree with the decision, and I kind of thought you would end up regretting it. But you did involve her in the decision. If one of my kids was asking me to just go ahead and let them take the paddling, I might agree to it. You're fine. When we are on here it is so easy just to spout of our opinions - me included. But if we were all sitting face to face in an office working together talking about it, it would not be nearly as offensive. When things are in writing they seem so much more harsh. Don't be too hard on yourself.

Bathtub opinions needed please! [2007-11-30]
Hi ladies! We are building a new house and our contractor needs to know the dimensions of our new tub in the master bath so he can build the platform around it. My husband has now decided it would be easier to just put in one of those stand alone claw foot tubs. I do not like them, but we are selling the house in 2 years and building another one for our permanent home. So I need opinions. Do you like the looks/functionality of these types of tubs or would you prefer a normal soaking tub with a ceramic surround? Don't hold back, I need honest opinions. Thanks!

IC status - need opinions [2007-11-16]
I started last week as an IC for a small to medium MTSO. I decided to work as an IC because I wanted flexibility in my schedule. However, they insist on a set 40-hour schedule and working holidays, just like an FTE. They are not paying me any benefits, not paying my taxes including SS, and I have run out of work 2 days already. Now I I get paid nothing extra for the holidays. I didn Has the working universe changed this much, or am I a sap for putting up with it? I would really like to hear from other ICs who have faced the same situation- please let me know how you handled it. I cannot afford to quit without another job, which I am looking for. TIA

That really was uncalled for. We all have different opinions. [2007-10-18]
xx

Why do they say...sm [2008-11-03]
Why do they say that it is taboo to talk about politics with people? Why can't we just DISCUSS our opinions and not get mad at the other person for having their OWN opinion. I have never been able to figure out why people can get mad at someone else for having their own opinion. Wouldn't it be nice if we could just sit down and have an intelligent conversation with other human beings without worrying about offending them? If everybody thought the same it would be a very very different and boring world AND if we could DISCUSS and not ARGUE I believe a lot more issues would get resolved. **sigh**

His opinions should not matter to you really (sm) [2008-10-29]
Everyone has opinions - what do you care what his are? Move past it - you cannot change him or his opinions - don't let his words get to you - then he wins. Move on. And don't answer the phone anymore when he calls!

Just want you to know I understand completely where sm [2008-10-29]
you are coming from and agree totally that it is terribly, terribly sad. I just don't want you to harp on it and let it work on you. You have done nothing wrong. Stand proud. They are entitled to their opinions - strange as they are - they are not entitled to spew them all over the place and say hurtful stupid things to you - just shows how mixed up they are. You sister was right in telling you to let it go - they are strange - weird - you are blessed your husband is so different. Give him a hug and ignore the rest of them. Good luck!

Thanks [2008-10-28]
I know everyone has differences of opinions. My mom and I sure had ours but we were never disrespectful. And all over what, politics???? Your going to insult your own family and tell them they are stup!d right to their faces because they don't share the same viewpoints you do? It's sickening beyond words. This brother has caused so many upsets in the past. Always was a little sh!!-disturber. One mothers day we all went out to eat a a mexican restaurant and there were two guys having lunch there (could have been brother, friends, or whatever), but my BIL actually turned his chair around and kept stairing at them and then commenting to everyone at the table that there were f@gs. I was utterly and truly disgusted and repulsed beyond all belief (and he was 18 years old so he knew better. He kept saying it loud enough because he wanted them to hear. Finally they got up and came over and asked if there was a problem. This was about the same time I was leaving to call a cab (my husband said heGee, my supervisor and I go out to lunch, are you going to call us derogatory names! I was fuming fumning fuming beyond words (that was the start of a difficult relationship with his family). Oh yes, when those two guys came over to our table to ask what the problem was, he went and hid behind his mother. We do feel good about the decision not to talk to them for a long time. Never would be fine by me.

To me this post is not really just about the Bible sm [2008-10-22]
but opinions/beliefs. Your mother had no need to talk about those things - just as you probably would not have wanted her to make a racist comment or an inappropriate sexual remark. She was out of line and if she cannot respect your house rules - then she needs to stay away. We all have opinions - we need to know when they should be shared.

Think I was too harsh in my comments to you sm [2008-10-21]
I apologize, I am very raw right now from undeserved treatment by DIL so when I saw your posting title, it bothered me. I love my grandkids so much that I would welcome a list of rules if one were presented to me. ItIf she persists, then she truly is in need of psychological help which is not up to you to provide. Give her the choice and if she chooses to keep it up, then youtalked to and given options. Good luck with it. Hate the sin and not the sinner. I once had to lay down the law with my sister and the Bible. I have made it clear that I won't tolerate Bible talk, she can come any time but the conversation has to be light, not inappropriate, not religious and no politics. It has worked pretty well, once in awhile she has a slip and has to be reminded but we are talking - no religion, no end-of-the world,no Jesus talk, it takes reinforcing every once in awhile. Good luck with it all, it's stressful.

Think I was too harsh in my comments to you sm [2008-10-21]
I apologize, I am very raw right now from undeserved treatment by DIL so when I saw your posting title, it bothered me. I love my grandkids so much that I would welcome a list of rules if one were presented to me. ItIf she persists, then she truly is in need of psychological help which is not up to you to provide. Give her the choice and if she chooses to keep it up, then youtalked to and given options. Good luck with it. Hate the sin and not the sinner. I once had to lay down the law with my sister and the Bible. I have made it clear that I won't tolerate Bible talk, she can come any time but the conversation has to be light, not inappropriate, not religious and no politics. It has worked pretty well, once in awhile she has a slip and has to be reminded but we are talking - no religion, no end-of-the world,no Jesus talk, it takes reinforcing every once in awhile. Good luck with it all, it's stressful.

I still think it should be the parents who teach the child these things, not the school's place. [2008-10-16]
Each child goes to school to learn facts. They learn their social skills, values, etc.at home and from friends that their parents allow them to associate with. The school is a public entity full of many INDIVIDUALS who all have different values and opinions. Teachers should not be teaching children their own personal values and should leave that to the parents.

If wanting to teach my son our own family values makes me a bigot..then so be it. sm [2008-10-16]
I will gladly wear that label. Flame away if you want. I will NEVER let some school teacher try to foist her own opinions on my child. And to do this on school time?? The bible flat out says that man should not lie with man or woman with woman. If that school district is an example of what passes for family values in SF, no wonder Michael Savage calls it San Fran Sicko. I have to agree with him. Pretty dress or no pretty dress.

Right.... [2008-10-16]
Our laws come from legislative bodies, not the bible, no matter what they are based on. Sodomy, specifically, is anal sex. Not all gay sex works that way, particularly for lots of lesbians. This also makes criminals out of LOTS of heterosexuals. Not everyone lives their lives in the cults of the guilt religions. We all have to hear, not your (collectively) opinions, not your beliefs, but what IS or IS NOT right or wrong. It's no wonder people don't want to hear it anymore. Your belief or disbelief in whatever or whomever does not change another person's reality.

Any suggestions are welcome [2008-09-30]
I find I am going into a depression each day as time goes on. The root cause is home sickness. I live far away from my family where the only way to see them is to fly. This happens maybe once every 3 or 4 years (which is how often I go back). My DH doesn However, with that said DH listens to a lot of talk shows, news stations, etc. Almost 2 or 3 times a week heanyone is nuts to want to get on a plane now adays. I havensis is desparate to see me and I haven He just came out again to tell me hedonCanada to Mexico whenever they want to) My heart just sinks everytime he says that. Once I told him that they have to make flying safe because the whole country is filled with people who have to fly for business or personal reasons. I want to go back to see my family so badly my heart just aches, sowas thinking maybe betweenThanksgiving andChristmas time frame (we donthat way it would give things time to settle, but I just haven Also, with the crisis and election coming up there is a lot of uncertainty too, and I can't throw too much at him (he can't handle it). - Believe me in this household the impending gloom and doom are an every day part of our lives and our talks what we'd do if certain things were to happen. What would you do? Do you think I should just hang in there and wait to see what happens over the next few weeks or so? P.S. - we do not have a marriage where I just demand or tell him the way its going to be. Of course I may just be thinking too much of this, but at this point not sure and I get more and more depressed the more I think about it. So looking for some opinions/suggestions on how you would handle this situation.

BREATH OF FRESH AIR [2008-09-26]
I think MTStars is Breath of Fresh Air after change in administration. This thread is staying on board is proof of it. MTStars was personal forum rather public board beofre. I was sick of HER, deleting every other thread and banning those who expressed their opinions that wasn't acceptable for her.

As Seen on TV Products - anybody? [2008-09-24]
Thought we could pool our opinions on the ones we have tried for others to see what works before we make that purchase. I tried the green bags that slow the ripening process and keep foods fresher longer. THEY WORK. Kept bananas twice the amount of time and they tasted fresh too. Anybody?

I've never had one but a friend of mine [2008-09-16]
did. She was 15 at the time and after a lot of pressure from her parents and her boyfriend She still feels guilty to this day. Personally, I am pro-choice. There are just too many variables to make it 1-sided. Fortunately, I I have always used birth control (2 forms before I got married and then just the pill after marriage). I We If that ever fails, I would carry the pregnancy, unless it posed a significant health risk to me. I I do think that abortion has become a method of birth control for so many. There need to be limitations and guidelines to its use, but please don I also believe that pregnancy has become a way for many young, unwed, uneducated mothers to get a free check every month. I think those children should be adopted out, also. But these are just my opinions.

Actually the one I was referring to is, indeed [2008-09-13]
still on the show and now in the top 10. The one you are referring to got voted off by the judges. Hewas rude and argued when they gave their opinions of his performance. The only I was referring to is Neal Boyd. He is wonderful. I love Donald Braswell, too! When he sang the Music of the Night from the Phantom of the Opera this week I actually had tears in my eyes. My favorite opera and what a tremendous performance on his part. Thank you for answering my post.

Who REALLY knows? [2008-08-27]
As usual, there are conflicting opinions among those with experience and intellect enough to take an educated guess about global warming. The rest of us just hear tidbits and have no clue what's what. It's basically like rooting for whatever sports team you decide to support. I think being respectful to our planet is a good thing regardless.

Hiatal hernia repair, anyone? [2008-08-26]
Has anyone here had surgery for a hiatal hernia? I am considering it, as I have been on Prevacid for way too long, and it doesn't even work now most of the time. The doctor said about a year or 2 ago that if it gets bigger, I would have to have surgery. He also said lose some weight. I am not that big, maybe 20 lbs. over. Anyways, I know that if you have the surgery, it can return again, so I just wanted to get opinions from anyone who may know or have already had this? Thanks!

A shame this place is so catty. But that is freedom of speech for you. [2008-08-24]
People come here to be supported, but need to realize there are all kinds of opinions out there. When you place yourself on a public forum to be supported expect to be bashed. That is the way of the world unfortunately. Just learn to try to see who wants to help and who wants to hurt. All kinds of agendas here. Your instincts will tell you who is real and who are the trolls. To all who are well-meaning here and look for support,or provide constructive criticism hang in there. Just filter out the bad and take away from it what you will.

Has anyone here at gastric bypass [2008-08-22]
and is/was your insurance through your employer? Is there a way to find out if the benefit is covered before you accept a position? Company I am considering has bcbs and I know bcbs does cover, but not necessarily all carriers have this as an included benefit. Please no nasty replies. I am not interested in personal opinions, just whether anyone knows if coverage is provided by any of the companies that solicit these boards.

yes, the dogs are left outside to run around, right next to a very busy road sm [2008-08-20]
yesterday i took my son to ball practice to see if he wanted to join. the friend i talked about in this post, his mom was there. (i knew the boy played ball, that so i told my son that we so i that he had already had two broken bones. she said that her husband (the dad that kicked the dog), has had several broken bones, from wrecks and she said when he was younger, he used to fight (like street fighting type stuff, not boxing). but she said that he doesn i thought to myself, i guess he just beats up dogs now. i it even if there is no child abuse going on, the kids are going to think it's ok to hurt animals. thanks for your opinions

You're aunt is bully, plain and simple and I would just stop visiting. [2008-08-04]
but I will tell you this, most mothers are going to voice their opinions to their kids about how they did things compared to out YOU do things. I think it :) My mother constantly tells me I My mother was a strict disciplinarian similar to your aunt when I was a kid. Spankings were routine and generally with the belt or the fly swatter or any other object handy. That's why I'm so soft. I let me mother know early on after I became a mother, that my kids are MY KIDS. She can give me advice and IONLY I (and DH too of course) will dole out any discipline necessary. Nobody else has permission to spank my children, EVER! My mom and I get along pretty good now. I accept that she will be nosy and pushy and she accepts that I will ignore her and not call for a few days when she gets on my nerves. I would just suggest being honest with your aunt and letting her know that you think you're a good mother, your DH thinks your a good mother and that your kids are doing fine and behave fine and if she doesn't think so, then she doesn't need to see the kids.

Your observations are right on [2008-07-25]
I think she has not fully researched getting help for people with disabilities. I guess I kept saying retarded because is shorter than writing out mental retardation. Thatspecial or slow, but to me itmental retardation. Forget exactly what percentage capacity they diagnosed him at but that was what it was. As for why they would bring a 2 year old or any other child into this situation is beyond my comprehension, and beyond my father's, my aunt's, my cousin's, my friends's, her friends, my in-laws, etc. I never said anything to her before they adopted because my aunt and a lot of her friends would give her their opinions about how they didn't think it's a good idea when they are always having trouble (sometimes financially but most of the time with the nephew), but sis would call me in tears after they would openly tell her what their viewpoints were and she would be crying because its all she's ever wanted was to have another child, and how all her freinds at church have at least 4 and 5 kids, etc, etc). I would tell her that I cannot advise her because I am not in her situation financially or dealing with the nephew, but told her that with me being 49 years old I would not do it. I just told her for me I am too old and couldn't take having a kid around me all the time. I think sis has some emotional problems herself. She feels that having a young kid around will keep her and her husband young. They love doing things all the time (I don't think they could stand to be home in their house for a whole day without going out). They always have to be out doing something (I'm 100% opposite - I never want to leave my house). Anyway...there's a lot they can't afford and they should have never adopted in the first place but that is my opinion. I only told my dad that once and he agreed with me totally but said you can't tell her anything and she gets defensive. So to answer the last part - they weren't thinking. My aunt has called me several times and always says that. Mom died 4 years ago. I think if she was alive she would have talked to sis and given her some feedback. Well right now I'm seeing if I can find any type of centers back there that help people with nephews problems and his condition. If it was me I would say ditch the nephew and keep the niece. HA HA. Nephew keeps saying how he wants to live on his own, but sis says he has also said that is so he can walk around naked all day, watch cartoons, eat and play with his power rangers without anyone telling him to do anything. All I say is I'm glad I'm not in their shoes. I like my peaceful environment and I know what my limits are both with people and financial. They just go on a day by day whatever happens happens way of life.

But that philosophy doesn't work unless [2008-07-18]
practiced from the beginning. You can't expect a child who has been virtually allowed to make no decisions from the get-to to be capable of making them later. I completely agree with your philosophy, but I think at this stage in the OP's situation, it may be too late for that. I actually insisted my daughter make her own decisions since she was able to communicate. Of course, you don't let them run out in the street if they want, but I taught her right wrong, guided her (which included punishment guidelines for inappropriate behavior), and gave her my opinions, but for the most part, she was in control. When they're able to make the little decisions (like the example you gave) when they're young, they are more equipped to graduate into the more important decisions down the road. My DD is 21 now and I feel like the luckiest mom in the world because other than just menial, normal things/stressors, she's really been just a wonderful child. I'm not saying I'm mom of the year because I do believe in the 'bad seed' theory and I just think she'd have turned out good if the wolves had raised her, but I do believe she has a certain confidence in herself that is a result of being able to make choices and suffering the consequences or reaping the benefits. I-) Just want to say one more thing. I've know many kids there were raised 'do it my way or no way' and just about every one of them are the worst behaved kids outside of the presence of their parents. And what's really bad is they're sneaky about it. They've mastered how to get away with things because they have to... and that's dangerous...

Need opinion on hardwood floor vs linoleum [2008-07-10]
We hope to put new flooring down in the house soon. I really like the look of linoleum in the kitchen. We are having a hard time deciding on a carpet color. A light neutral color or maybe a lightergreen would be nice but any lighter color will show everything I We have a really dark burgundy carpet now. Although I don We thought ofputting hardwood floors down but not sure if we want to put it in the kitchen too. Icarry the hardwood floor throughout the house--including the kitchen--but Ireally wouldrather have linoleum there.How would the hardwood floor (probably the medium color--not the real light or the real dark) looknext to a kitchen with linoleum? Would that be tacky? Thanks for the opinions. I really can We know we will be looking at it a really long time so wewant to be satisfied with our decision.

So many good ideas...sm [2008-07-10]
You guys gave me even more to think about. Some wonderful tips. At least now I have opinions from someone who has the different kinds of flooring. I'm going to print all the ideas and brainstorm. Thanks a bunch!