|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
There is something called the MDR1 gene...sm [2008-07-03]
MDR1 (multi-drug resistance gene). Itfound in herding breeds likecollies, aussies, etc., and somel other breeds as well. It The only way to know is to test the dog to see if has the gene or is a carrier. (I think that just involves a cheek swab.)
Were these dogs related to each other? I wonder if that gene was the cause, or if the vet was negligent, or if it was just terrible luck. It
Beforesurgery,Italk to the vet and make sureI understandwhat kind of drugs and anesthetic they use, and how the dog is monitored during anesthesia and while recovering. Just like with people, there is always a risk. Some vets have all the fancy, high tech equipment for monitoring, but others relymore onan assistantto do it manually. I prefer There are not nearly as many vet anesthesiologists in the vet world as there are in human medicine.
II I just read about this gene when I was helping a friend research the breed. Her first aussie died at a ripe old age of about 14 yrs old, I think, andshe has one thatyear old and has had no health problems that I know of. Isorry for your friend. To have a dog die after a flea dip of all things... and then another after routine teeth cleaning. There is always a risk with anesthesia, but we get so used to thinking it
She took her current Aussie to the vet for neutering. When he came home he was lethargic. They took him back and the doctor put him on an IV to flush his system of any anesthesia?
This s/l either the dog had a bad reaction to the anesthesia, or the vet went overboard and gave too much...
Bath and teeth [2008-06-27]
Maybe it Some of it tastes yucky to a kid or the mint may be too strong orbrushing could be irritating his gums. Let him pick a child As for baths, I had to be dragged kicking and screaming to the tub. What mom didnsaid if I told mom she would call the adoption agency and tell them to take me back (I wasnatage 4 I didn Maybe he saw something on TVthat scared him. Some shows are pretty graphic (news too). I recall one show where a lady was brushing her teeth and blood started pouring from the faucet. Try letting him sit in a dry tub with a bucket of water for a sponge bath. Sit down and talk with the kid (not talk to) and assure him/her that if there is something going on you canhelp.
"go brush your teeth" -- kid don't listen [2008-06-26]
You know, truthfully,I have a nearly perfect 7-year-old kid. He Why is it, then, that we have to havethis big fight EVERY night and EVERY morning regardinggo brush your teeth.Ihave to tell him this six to seven times beforeI am heard. Then I My onlythought is totry ignoring him when he requests something, making him ask me six to seven times. That might work. Gotta love him, but this really irks me.... Anyone else with a similar dilemma?
I called them today and begged and practically cried. [2008-05-21]
I also posted on the Folger And it I can I guess life could be worse, but at the moment I cangetting stiffed on child support, no economic stimulus rebate, and now no latte.
A friend called me today on my break SM [2008-05-19]
and says she and her husband visited her husband My friend went out to the desk and asked why . . . The patient has MRSA. No sign on door, no special instructions or precautions given to the public about visiting this patient. She says they were there for about an hour or so and she touched him different times during the visit. What do you think? The souce of the MRSA is unknown at this point. I told her to call her primary care and discuss this issue with him.
Yeah, Tried to... even called the state attorney general's office [2008-05-13]
to see if a medical facility could get away with charging that kind of interest and they said as long as they notified you prior to the bill, it's okay because you basically agree to the terms when you accept that form of payment option, which I didn't but... They advised me that I would have to hire a personal lawyer to fight it and I figured it wasn't worth it for a balance of 200.00.
Pretty bad because that is the closest hospital. The next closest is almost 200 miles from here so they really stick it to the people who live in this community when health care is already sky high and the care is not entirely satisfactory either.
One of those so-called miracle teeth whitener kits on TV. SM [2008-05-06]
This one came with a special light . . . OH, RIGHT!
I stood in the bathroom holding this stupid light (which I am sure was not more than a regular flashlight) up to my teeth, running to the kitchen where the light was better and swearing my teeth were getting whiter! Did this for a few days, applying the solution (which had no color, no smell) and NOTHING. After a few days of this exhausting procedure my teeth looked absolutely no better!
TOTAL RIP OFF!
i'm not sure how they consider that a miracle [2008-04-09]
so is it one person or 2??? Personality wise I hope it's just one. I've seen that special with the girls with one body and 2 head and it breaks my heart how they will struggle later on to do things normally like get married and have children.
Miracle baby born with 2 faces [2008-04-09]
This was NOT in the Enquirer. This was really on the first page of the Lakeland Ledger in Florida. An Indian infant was born with two (count them) two full faces. That is four eyes, 2 noses, 2 mouths, and thebaby eats with both mouths. They are calling this child the reincarnation of a Hindu goddess anda temple is being built to this goddess in the small town. The family is being given lots of money and gifts, and visits!
You should see the picture of this kid. Perfectly normal, except each side of the face is a full face. Nothing else wrong that they know of. I did not know what to think today, if I feel sorry for the child, or worried about how this defect will affect her life. Also, what
miracle [2008-04-09]
Thank goodness for her and her family they consider her a miracle and a goddess reincarnated instead of a devil child or something evil.
I looked this up yesterday and was reading that life expectancy is not good. One story mentioned a pig with this condition who aspirated when he was eating with one mouth and breathing with the other and died.
From a medical point of view I think it's fascinating. I thought it was a siamese twin thing at first but apparently no, it's a genetic anomoly that makes the head develop multiple facial features, maybe like being born with 6 fingers instead of 5.
Called another medical office.... [2008-04-08]
to ask a question and the secretary said I I think that is very unprofessional. If you are at lunch, then I think one should either not answer the phone or put it in voicemail mode!
Just called the ASPCA yesterday to renew my membership [2008-03-31]
I was with them several months ago but changed banks. I appreciate the work they do with the animals and commend them and glad to be a part of their work.
Past, present, future. Still expecting miracle. [2008-03-20]
//
Thats a new one. Being called the "T" word for being [2008-03-11]
x
Couldn't you have just called animal control? [2008-03-10]
xx
It was called Hawiian White Ginger..sm [2008-02-26]
and I wore it too! It perhaps we should petitionavon to bring it back. Cat
That was not called for. She copied this from an internet site, she did not write it. nm [2008-02-19]
nm
The so called movie stars of today are a big laugh [2008-02-19]
LL has nothing going for her in the way of the blond bombshell, Marilyn Monroe. Not the figure, not the status of being a real bonifide star, nothing. I know of no actress these days who can start to fill the shoes of actresses of years gone by. I miss the glamour, the mystique. These spoiled brats they have now that apparently like to show everything and in no class like the oldies. I cannot get past pics in my head of LL passed out in a car looking like a dopehead. Some class, huh?
I just called my friend and sang happy birthday on her lunch hour...sm [2008-02-15]
Juliet is a kindergarten teacher in NYC...She said, We just had our Valentine...All I could say was They She said, Well yeah, that. I said, Getready for a barforama!....If I hadnthroughitI couldCat
Have you guys ever visited the site called... [2008-02-08]
I can has cheezburger? Oh my gosh some of the pictures people post...and the captions they think up....KILLER!
Get this, older aunt of mine, DIL called and said if anything happens [2008-02-07]
to her- can you give me a call, in other words when she dies. This aunt is also great aunt to my son- I asked the DIL why don't you go to see her now (she is in middle 80s)- always an excuse, no car, no this, no that. She lives driving distance, about 170 miles from here. Just pitiful is all I can say- I visit her every 3-4 months and call her weekly.
That's about the time I would have gotten dressed, called up a girl friend - sm [2008-02-04]
And gone to a movie or something. I would also make dern sure that I got home at least an hour AFTER he gets home. Let him wonder.
The miracle of Chantix. Please read [2008-01-31]
For all of you who think you simlpy can't stop smoking you need t hear this.
A member of my family has literally tried for the last 22 years to stop smoking. Used everything from the cold turkey method to nicotine gum/patches etc. He would go as long as a few weeks or even a month and then right back to smoking.
I got wonderful news last Saturday over coffee with my niece. Her husband whom this family dearly loves and respects has finally won the battle with Chantix. My niece has asked him a few times to try it, and a few weeks before Christmas he did. He is completely smoke free. She asked him if he minds it and his reply was thatsmoking no longer even enters his mind.He said that with all other attempts even when not smoking he always wanted to and could not get it off his mind.
He is now concentrating on his health in general and has lost 12 pounds since Christmas! You go Ray! He has tried so hard and has come out victorious.
Don't give up.
P.S. He tried Wellburtin in the past, but eventually went back to smoking due to side effects on the medication.
when I first moved to KY I called it a PIRATE tax..nm [2008-01-23]
*
I think it is called denial - sm [2008-01-20]
There is no denying when you see an actual picture, however. Your current height and weight give you a BMI of 37.4, which puts you in the severely obese category.
Australian sheppard - Aussies [2008-07-03]
A friend has had several Aussies and has had problems at the vet's office.
One died after it was taken in for grooming and flea dipping. She said that the only dip that can be used is that as the same for sheep???
Her daughter's dog was in for routine teeth cleaning, but the anesthsia got to him and he died.
She took her current Aussie to the vet for neutering. When he came home he was lethargic. They took him back and the doctor put him on an IV to flush his system of any anesthesia?
Does any of this sound familiar? Thank you
Is this inconsiderate or what? [2008-07-03]
My son-in-law stopped by our house on the way to work this morning. My hubby was pulling out of the driveway and I saw him give a bag to my husband and he left. My hubby brought the bag to me and said I was told to give this to you until tonight. He said my SIL was going to have a surprise for our daughter this evening after work at a local restaurant but didn I opened the bag and there was ice cream and pickles inside (?). Well, the first thing we thought of was pregnant and needless to say, our first grandchild, the look on our face was shock, disappointment, and happiness at the same time. We just stood there staring at each other, wondering what the **** was going on. My hubby went on to work and called a few minutes later, saying my SIL had text messaged him and said for me nor my husband to call OUR daughter or him today. I have sat in tears most of the day. That jerk (and he is a jerk) just told us our daughter is expecting our grandchild but not to talk to her today. What is the surprise about? He already knows, SHE already knows, we already know. So I guess you have to know my SIL to know he is a controlling person.....my daughter just hasn My husband has been so upset all day about this. Shouldn We are told by him to keep this inside all day. They are going to see his parents tomorrow at their lakehouse and I suppose tell them together, even though I have a feeling he This is a day my husband and I should be so gloriously happy and we feel sad too. We don I have just seen my daughter and she said nothing and I can This is my baby having a baby and we don Our son was here and saw what we saw and he was so happy to be an uncle, grinning from ear to ear, but can I have to say I am so angry with him right now. You have to know how controlling he has been. My daughter wouldn Are you kidding? What sick pleasure does he get from spoiling all this for us by it not coming from her, the pregnant one, standing there. Our child.
We still don After all, they already know, we already know, so why haven I have to say my husband is so upset by this right now, he has called from work several times today and could not even focus on an important meeting this morning. To be honest, I am not at all sure how I will react once we are together this evening. Is this just a dumb way of doing this or has anyone else had this happen like this? We are just dumbfounded about it all and think this is avery cruel way of doing this.
There is something called the MDR1 gene...sm [2008-07-03]
MDR1 (multi-drug resistance gene). Itfound in herding breeds likecollies, aussies, etc., and somel other breeds as well. It The only way to know is to test the dog to see if has the gene or is a carrier. (I think that just involves a cheek swab.)
Were these dogs related to each other? I wonder if that gene was the cause, or if the vet was negligent, or if it was just terrible luck. It
Beforesurgery,Italk to the vet and make sureI understandwhat kind of drugs and anesthetic they use, and how the dog is monitored during anesthesia and while recovering. Just like with people, there is always a risk. Some vets have all the fancy, high tech equipment for monitoring, but others relymore onan assistantto do it manually. I prefer There are not nearly as many vet anesthesiologists in the vet world as there are in human medicine.
II I just read about this gene when I was helping a friend research the breed. Her first aussie died at a ripe old age of about 14 yrs old, I think, andshe has one thatyear old and has had no health problems that I know of. Isorry for your friend. To have a dog die after a flea dip of all things... and then another after routine teeth cleaning. There is always a risk with anesthesia, but we get so used to thinking it
She took her current Aussie to the vet for neutering. When he came home he was lethargic. They took him back and the doctor put him on an IV to flush his system of any anesthesia?
This s/l either the dog had a bad reaction to the anesthesia, or the vet went overboard and gave too much...
Did you ask them...... [2008-07-02]
why they only wrote a check for 87 dollars? Did they say that $87 was all they would pay or could it possibly be because they couldn Just a thought.
You did not give the whole story as to what kind of dog, was it in your yard, what was your daughter doing when she was bit....kind of thing. How bad was she hurt? Did she have to have cosmetic surgery to repair the damage from the dog bite?
I think it would depend on the severity of the dog bite on how I would handle it. The police should have been called, a report should have been made, the dog should have been quarantined for so many days to make sure it didnt The owner should have shown proof of getting all the dogs shots, etc.
I personally think that they should be held accountable for the doctor bills. You were perfectly content with just getting the money for the doctor bills until they made you mad and now you want money for losing work and money for your daughter It just amazes me how people try to be fair until they get mad and then they just want to get all the money they can out of someone. Sometimes I think people get lawyer happy. I think suing is going to be more a hassel than it is worth and if your daughter wasn JMO though.
Unbelievable sm [2008-07-02]
$87 was all they planned to give us. Her medical bills totalled $800, $87 was our portion. The other portion we figured for pain and suffering. We always wanted to getpain and suffering for our daughter. This was no surprise to the owner.
Read the thread. I don My daughter was standing on the sidewalk in front ofthe ownerhouse when the dog attacked her.
Again, if you will read the thread you Her dog has been loose on more than one occasion since the attack without a leash.
The police were called, and there is a police report, along with ER and doctor notes.
It is unbelievable how uncaring people are here on this board. Even though my daughter didn This is an 8-year-old child.
The owners should be penalized because they are allowing their dog to be loose without a leash on a street filled with young children. I don't have any sympathy for them.
It amazes me how people on this board show much more compassion for the dog that attacked my daughter than for my daughter. No one seems to care that this dog has been loose since the attack or that there were no penalties for this owner. The dog has never been impounded. A friend of mine lives next door to a dog that bit someone, and that dog was never impounded either.
I think I I have been coming here for years, but for people to be so cruel here to my daughter especially is just unimaginable to me.
I will do whatever I have to do to make my daughter feel safe in her own neighborhood. I have consulted with an attorney and will probably proceed in small claims court unless this owner wants to try to settle this with us.
I pray that nothing like this ever happens to any of your children or family members. It It
I'm done here.
Wow, that's really interesting! sm [2008-07-02]
i have one bassett that is scared of fireworks and i have another bassett very scared of thunderstorms. he gets so scared and shakes, his teeth will actually chatter. i feel so bad for him. i thanks for the information!!!
I do understand. [2008-07-01]
I understand that you were trying to avoid litigation on this matter, but the bottom line is either you avoid it or you don There is no in-between. Did the hospital file your daughter If so, what would you do with the $800 that the dog owner would give you?
I don He has 2 dogs - family dogs, mind you - a golden retriever and a lab, both on the small side. He had friends over and his friend The dog got excited and jumped up on the child (who was about 7 years old), catching his claw on the child It tore the skin, but nothing severe enough to require stitches or anything.
My brother He even called from the hospital telling my brother about the treatment his child would need. My brother was very empathetic and concerned over the child Then the friend told him he would be getting the bill. My brother did get the bill, but when he contacted the hospital to pay it, the hospital told him it was already paid by the insurance company. My brother then contacted his friend, who said he could just make the check out to him and he would see to it that it got to the insurance. Yeah, right.
People in this world are always looking for a way to get something for nothing. I hope that In any event, I hope your daughter heals without scars, emotionally or physically. I have a feeling if you take this to court, your daughter will be reliving this nightmare for a long time to come. I would be more concerned about getting the dog impounded than I would be about lining your pockets.
The end of a friendship [2008-07-01]
My girlfriend came over one day and was chatting with me on the sofa. I had just gotten home from the hospital from having a hysterectomy and she came to pick me up to go see another friend of hers who was in the hospital having just been diagnosed with ovarian cancer (I couldn't drive yet).
My 2 dogs started scuffling over a bone and my friend got an extremely tiny, a little larger than a pin prick mark on the back of her ankle (either from one of the dog's teeth or a sharp end of the bone, hard to tell). I gave her antiseptic wash, a bandage, said I was sorry and thought that was the end of it. We went to visit our friend.
Awhile later, I answered the door to be served with a summons. We were being sued by my friend. I want you to know that this bite did not even bleed.
She had a tattoo right in the area and when she took pictures of the bite for her attorney, it was very, very hard to see a mark at all.
So, anyway, by the time it went to court (and here is a very ironic thing, the day my husband and I got up and ready to go to court, my sweet Barney, my Schnauzer, died).
Well, between pictures of the injury and her poor performance on the stand (oh God it was unbelievable the way she tried to beef up the whole story), the jury came back with a guilty plea for us. They had to, because our dog or the bone did bite her.
They awarded her the amount her insurance did not cover and I believe 1 or 2 missed days from work. It came to about $1,500. We saw her in the parking lot when we left, she was crying. She was expecting the big payday and it didn't happen.
However, the 10 year friendship did end. We were Girl Scout leaders together for most of those years, our daughters were best friends, but I could never want to be friends with someone who would do such a thing and consider it well, after all, the insurance will pay.
So be careful what you are expecting. Expect the whole thing to take a long time to get to court and the results to be perhaps less than you expect. Now, maybe your daughter is significantly scarred by the dog bite. I don't know and don't want to offend you with my story. Also, hopefully you have pictures that you took right away when it happened. You will probably need them. Plus you will have to be able to find a lawyer who will take it to court for you. My ex-friend's lawyer was about as inept as could be. I almost felt sorry for her.
If it was really significant, I would [2008-07-01]
think the final cost would be more than $800. My niece was mauled by a dog and spent about a week in the hospital. She was 4 years old at the time. It was the saddest thing seeing her in that hospital bed with her whole head swollen up. The dog bite ripped out a couple of her still-forming permanent teeth and she ended up with quite a nasty scar along one cheek. Most of the stitches were in her scalp.
My sister and her husband had to sue the homeowner It took quite a while to sort it all out. They ended up with a settlement that would after 15 years of very modest growth pay for her college and also any future medical bills. She has had revision of that scar on her face, but she is 19 years old now and still hasn She ismissing bone where theimplants need to go and so will need grafting to be able to accomplish it.
She was not emotionally scarred forever by the incident. She is fine, and it didn Just keep loving your daughter and shebe back to her old self. Money won
Try not to let your anger overtake you. I know they are responsible, but there is no need to try and take them for as much as you can. You could conceivably ruin their future. Accidents happen. What exactly were the circumstances surrounding the bite?
If it was really significant, I would [2008-07-01]
think the final cost would be more than $800. My niece was mauled by a dog and spent about a week in the hospital. She was 4 years old at the time. It was the saddest thing seeing her in that hospital bed with her whole head swollen up. The dog bite ripped out a couple of her still-forming permanent teeth and she ended up with quite a nasty scar along one cheek. Most of the stitches were in her scalp.
My sister and her husband had to sue the homeowner It took quite a while to sort it all out. They ended up with a settlement that would after 15 years of very modest growth pay for her college and also any future medical bills. She has had revision of that scar on her face, but she is 19 years old now and still hasn She ismissing bone where theimplants need to go and so will need grafting to be able to accomplish it.
She was not emotionally scarred forever by the incident. She is fine, and it didn Just keep loving your daughter and shebe back to her old self. Money won
Try not to let your anger overtake you. I know they are responsible, but there is no need to try and take them for as much as you can. You could conceivably ruin their future. Accidents happen. What exactly were the circumstances surrounding the bite?
Well, now it's my turn to tell my story...(Beware..this is long) [2008-06-29]
Well, I just don I was 26 years old when I met and married my husband. It will be14 years ago this August. I was a platinum blond, Swedish, 26-year-old, voluptuous virgin waiting for my prince to come. I had never dated because I was too fearful and shy. My mother always told me that my prince was coming. She just didnthe prince of darkness. It has been a nightmare, although he says it has been great with only a few bumps along the way. He is abusive in every way including verbally, mentally, emotionally, some physical although very little (not an excuse, just telling it the way it is), what I feel is sexual abuse with me but not the children,but the worst by far is his financial abuse. He has told me many, many times, Who do you think YOU are? What do you think...that you I can find a dozen more women like you. I have three children, now ages 14, 13, and 11. 14-year-old has ADHD and oppositional defiant disorder. My husbandis just like this although he has never been diagnosed and never would be because in his own words, I am perfect just like God made me. There is nothing wrong with me. The problem here is you. My credit is down the toilet. Credit score is about 500. His is 800. Through the years, when the children were babies I had to feed them dry cereal with a cup of water because he wouldn One very hot night in the summer, I had to feed them generic hot dogs and pink beans, which were some kind of bean that slithered out of the can in a gelatinous material. The kids werewere dry heaving at the table. One day when I was about 8 months pregnant with my last child, he came up to me and said, Well, I I said what He said (very matter of fact), I I won If you want something, get off your f______fat a__ and get a job. I had a 6-month-old and a 1 1/2-year-old and 8 months pregnant with the third one. What!! Get a job!! Are you crazy?? He said, Oh well. Famous last words. That is all I ever hear. He has ripped out phone lines, denied us food and clothing. We have two cars. He used to hide the car I would drive around the neighborhood so I couldn He would even take the carseats. One time when I was pregnant, I had no money so my girlfriend needed a babysitter a few hours a week. She lives in Connecticut, which is about 45 minutes from my home. She could only pay $45 a week but I would drive up there four days a week to watch those kids just to get that measly $45. One day when I was leaving to go, I wanted $2 for an ice cream cone (I was pregnant at the time and that was my thing during that pregnancy). I asked him for $2 and he said no. I reached into his wallet and took $2 anyway. So he came after me. I took out the butcher knife but he ran outside to get to the car first so I couldn I put away the knife and ran out the back door to try to get to the car first but he got there before me. I reached in to try to grab the car keys out of the ignition when he rolled the window up as hard as he could. I was screaming at the top of my lungs. I thought he was going to break my arm. I was able to backhand him and he unrolled the window. A little while later I ran to the neighbors to call the police because he ripped the phone lines out. I was there for about 15-20 minutes calling the police, family, and my friends to come and help. When I got back to the house, he had taken both cars (hid one in the neighborhood) and went to work. He left my 9-month-old and 1 1/2-year-old children all by themselves (and at the time I lived on a very busy street where cars would drive by at 50 mph). When I walked in, they were sitting on the living room floor screaming at the top of their lungs. The next morning I was in the shower and I lifted up my arms to wash my hair when out of the corner of my eye I saw something on the underside of my arm. It was a jet black bruise about four to five inches long by about two inches wide. It was literally jet black. I was stunned. When I called the police, I told them what was going on with his abuse. I told them I was pregnant with two little ones at home. I told them I had no food. I told them and showed them the bruise and I told them I wanted to press assault charges. They said, He did that to you? I said yes. I said, I want him arrested for assault. I told them where he worked. They turned around and told me that because the incident happened the day before that there was nothing they would do and that they weren They told me to just let him lie low for a while. This happened in 1996. We are not talking the 50s here. This was just before they handed me a pamphlet on battered women and battered women The pamphlet said there does not have to be any sign of physical abuse. If you are in a situation where you simply fear for your safety, the person can be arrested. And I am sitting there pregnant with ahuge, jet black bruise underneath my arm from where he rolled my arm up in the window. This is just a few tidbits of the life I have had with him. There have been some good times and good vacations but mostly bad. We have fought so bad for years and years that I know the toll it has taken on the kids. The guilt I have is insurmountable. If he buys groceries, I have to pay him back. If he pays the phone bill, I have to pay him back. If he buys me anything or gives me a $10 or $20 bill, I have to pay him back. Most of the time, I am not allowed to go into a store with him. I went with him once to Wal-Mart and I put a $2 box of sweetener into the carriage. That was it. I am now not allowed to go into a store with him. He screams at us that he pays the rent, therefore, it is his house and we have to learn to live the way he wants us to and we should be catering to him. If we don He has told me for years that he is a king and that the house is his castle and that he has allowed us to live with him because he is kind, loving, and gracious. He will only buy oneChristmas gift for his kids and no stocking stuffers or tape or wrapping paper or anything like that.I have to do that with what I get paid to do MT work. He doesn When they were little, I would tell him that the children needed some cool clothes for summer. He would take their little pants and cut them off and then take their turtleneck shirts and cut off the turtle neck and cut off the sleeves and say, There you go. There Or he would just tell me, Go ask your sister to buy them some clothes. He has threatened to kill me and the children if I leave. He has told me that he would kill me and the children before I would ever see child support. He has a sex fettish where he wants it all the time, every day multiple times in a day if he could get it (not that he does, mind you. I stopped that crazy crap a long time ago), and I am just supposed to stop all that I am doing and fulfill his needs (even though sex for me offers virtually nothing other than soreness,swelling, and boredom and has always been like this). If I don I am very overweight, I smoke like a chimney, my credit is destroyed, I don I have less now 14 years later than I did before I married him. At least before I married him I had my own very nice car and some clothes. I don My clothes are tattered, stained, and worn. And...I had dreams of what my life was going to be like when I got married. But it certainly was not a life like this. My kids are older now and they are seeing their father for who he is. He blames me and tells me it is all the bad stuff I am telling the children. I keep telling him it is what they have seen for 14 years. They beg me to divorce him. My youngest, who is 11, was diagnosed last year with severe ulcerative colitis. He has had a flare now for the past six weeks with at least ten bouts of diarrhea with blood every day. He talks about depression a lot and always asking me what it is. When I got the call last year from his pediatrician telling me to take him to the hospital for a possible blood transfusion (this was when we got his diagnosis), Ialmost fell on the floor from fear. I called my husband at work to tell him he needed to come home. He said, I can I have to work. He said, Don His red blood cell count had dropped to 7.2 froma normal of 12 because of his bleeding. He came to the hospital when he got out of work. He showed up at 6:00 p.m. We went outside and talked for a bit and then about 20 minutes after he showed up, he said, Well, I have to go home to eat and shower. I When I got angry, he said Hey, I I need to rest. Besides, there We still didn I didn I was scared to death. But he had to go home to eat and shower and rest!!!! I think that was the beginning of the end for me. I once read something on these boards that someone posted saying Marriage is not supposed to be a good deal for one and misery for the other. That is what my life has been. My marriage was a great deal for him...kids that he never has to pay for (I mean nothing...not school projects and believe me there are a ton of them, not clothes, not shoes, notebooks, backpacks, nothing), free sex, and a wife that he doesn I believe in my soul that my marriage was a good business deal for him. If you knew my husband, you would laugh at that statement because he is extremely uneducated and talks like a mentally retarded person. People in the past have actually asked me if he was mentally retarded. He thinks that if my son would drink lots and lots of water, that that will cure his ulcerative colitis and makes fun of me and insults me and everyone else. Itell him he is a moron and he doesn His abusive mother made them drink nothing but water. She would not buy them anything or strive for a better life. They lived in a nightmare life. So now he gets very angry when we woncure everything. He tells us that he is trying to show us how to live right but we just won He tells this to other people too including our landlord. He has the most disgusting habits. He picks scabs and eats them, he has eczema and psoriasis so he is one huge flake, which he enjoys picking off chunks and dropping them in a pile on the floor, he passes unbearable gas (like every two or three minutes that has such a horrid stench it makes all of us nauseous) and then flips out if we spray a room spray. He will actually grab the can and scream that this is his house and we are all just disgusting to live with and just impossible to live with. He just had a fight with my 12-year-old daughter tonight because he was passing tons and tons of gas and she sprayed a room spray. He got up in her face screaming at the top of his lungs at 11:00 at night that this is his house. He will pass gas all he wants and that he won She was crying and begging me to divorce him. She kept saying, You said it would be better for the family if you stayed married to him but it It won Well, I could go on and on. It has been 14 years of this but I think you get the picture. I have no money. I don I have a son who is going to need ongoing frequent medical care and I am afraid he will cancel the insurance if I do anything to get rid of him. I have a great fear for our safety. He has major problems with having to give up his money so to haveto pay child support will send him over the edge. He is a pathological liar so you can He told me, I would never allow anyone to judge me like that. You can tell the judge to kiss my balls. He seems to expect the absolute highest standards from the children and I but he doesn Never has and never will but will shove it down my throat when he doesn Well, any advice. I really am looking for legal advice for anyone else who has been through this. I know I need to get rid of him...for the kids sake. They need to see that life is not like this and not all men do this and that you don My daughter, who just turned 13, says to me she hates men with a passion. I told my niece that I felt like I was dying. I never, never, never, never leave my house except to go to Dunkin Donuts up the street to get a coffee. I haven And that is three hours probably once every two months. I am lonely, isolated, and ragingly angry. I want to go back to school but when I talk about that, he poo poos it saying I should go back in five or ten years or 15 years when my bills are paid and I can afford it. HELLO????? I am going to be 43 in October. Maybe I should just wait to go back to school until I Well you get the picture. If you By the way, when I bring up any of his abuse to him, he tells me I don Funny, he always remembers every time I swear at him though. Has never forgotten a single time.
my kids didn't listen either [2008-06-28]
until I gave them a set time such as you have to take you bath and have your teeth brushed by 8:00 and if it wasn't done they lost a privilage. After a couple of times they saw I was serious and the problem stopped.
my niece [2008-06-27]
You can tell them not to be like my niece who is going to be 14 in about a week. She is a young lady now. She does not bathe, brush her hair, wear deodorant, or brush her teeth. She has now gotten over 13 cavities and will be spending the next sets of mondays at the dentist getting teeth fixed. She also has terrible gum disease. I have tried talks but she is not my child. She does not live with me so it is hard for her to listen to her mother. Her mother really isndon to my 12 year old who does not want to brush his teeth or retainer, mostly because he does not rinse the retainer off enough and it tastes funny. HA.
This works! [2008-06-27]
I did the same. It only took one summer (last year) of doing this and then we slowly tapered off the chore chart. I would forget to print it off the computer from time to time. Since then I no longer have to ask but when I do it is already done, just had to get in the habit of doing it without question, I think. My child is like OPs that he really is a great kid but for some reason brushing teeth was a nightmare twice a day every day. The only difference in our allowance chart was that for each item completed (without being asked or questioned) my child would get 25 cents - totaled at the end of the week. He still had to do everything, it was just a matter of initiative and no arguments on his part. I think max would be $5 a week or something like that. I had it calculated out so I new there was a limit. Truth be told, he asked for more than $5 of stuff every time we went to the store (and that was another fight) so this did double-duty in that if we went to the store he had to use his own money. Amazing how picky kids get when its their money.
Bath and teeth [2008-06-27]
Maybe it Some of it tastes yucky to a kid or the mint may be too strong orbrushing could be irritating his gums. Let him pick a child As for baths, I had to be dragged kicking and screaming to the tub. What mom didnsaid if I told mom she would call the adoption agency and tell them to take me back (I wasnatage 4 I didn Maybe he saw something on TVthat scared him. Some shows are pretty graphic (news too). I recall one show where a lady was brushing her teeth and blood started pouring from the faucet. Try letting him sit in a dry tub with a bucket of water for a sponge bath. Sit down and talk with the kid (not talk to) and assure him/her that if there is something going on you canhelp.
Identity theft -- never thought it could [2008-06-26]
Yesterday, I got a call from QVC. I had ordered a GPS system for my hubby and QVC called to say they were unable to complete processing of my order because my credit card wouldn QVC said the address I gave them as the billing address did not match the billing address of my credit card. I asked the rep to hold on while I pulled my credit card account up on line. When I did, I saw that my address and phone number had been changed to somewhere in TX (I live in PA). I told QVC I would have to call them back. I immediately called the credit card company. They pulled up my account and said that yes my address had been changed just a few days ago. When I asked how, they couldn They did not know if it was done on-line or by telephone. This, I don If someone called in to change it, shouldn Furthermore, if it was changed on-line, wouldn
At any rate, it was changed, and my cc company tried to contact me to verify it by calling the new phone number given. (Makes no sense). Having received no answer, they sent a letter to me, which I have yet to get. One day after changing my address, someone made a $10 on-line purchase with cc account, which went through. Immediately following that, a $4500 on-line purchase was attempted to be put through. This one the cc company did not allow (thank God for small miracles).
After having all of this explained to me, I was then transferred to an Identity Theft Specialist, who would help me close this account and reopen another one as well as put into action security alerts for me. For the next 7 years, my credit report will be flagged as a fraud alert, meaning that if anyone tries to open a new account in my name, the lender will have go through extensive verification to confirm it I
I also had to file a report with my local police, which I doubt will accomplish anything. Local police are not trained in the same manner as state police, and I don We will see.
I did, however, write down the address and the phone number that my account was changed to. My husband called the number last night from his cell phone and no one answered. He left a message stating he was looking for my name and to please return his call to his number. They immediately called back, but when my husband answered, they said nothing. They called back again later that night and did the same thing.
Here I told her that apparently I was a victim of identity theft. She said that I said what do you mean and she proceeds to tell me that there have been a lot of account takeovers with this particular company and that it was determined to be an inside job. This left me feeling less than secure about setting up a new account with that company. It also makes me wonder if that My husband says as soon as the new account is set up, we
Fortunately, this cc company has 0% identity theft liability, so we will not be responsible for the charges that did go through. However, the bigger concern here is that this person obviously has enough personal information about me to set up new accounts without my knowledge; hence, the reason for the fraud alerts on my credit report.
I am so furious, if I ever get my hands on this person, I My husband and I have worked hard all our lives to have good credit and some skuzbucket thinks he can just come along and take it. I don I intend to pursue this fully. If it is an inside job, I will make sure that this credit card company does something about its current employee background checks.
So, take a minute today and call your credit companies or go on-line and check to make sure that noone has changed your address and phone number.
"go brush your teeth" -- kid don't listen [2008-06-26]
You know, truthfully,I have a nearly perfect 7-year-old kid. He Why is it, then, that we have to havethis big fight EVERY night and EVERY morning regardinggo brush your teeth.Ihave to tell him this six to seven times beforeI am heard. Then I My onlythought is totry ignoring him when he requests something, making him ask me six to seven times. That might work. Gotta love him, but this really irks me.... Anyone else with a similar dilemma?
here's what I do -- [2008-06-26]
Every summer, I make a chore chart for each of my 3 boys, ages 5, 7 and 10. Brushing teeth is apparently a big chore that requires a reminder. So on my chore chart it goes, once in the morning and once at night (I figure 2 times a day is pretty good). Other chores I include are making their beds, picking up toys, dirty clothes in the hamper. They are also each required to help wash their clothes once a week and put away their clean clothes. In addition, they
Each time they complete a chore, they get a sticker for that day. At the end of the week, we add up all their stickers. If they have a certain number collectively-- they get to pick a group activity (local amusement park, chuckie cheese or bike ride with the parents, etc.). If they don
I Kids need structure, even in the summer, and this gives them something to look forward to at the end of the week. I Rewards don Just pick something you know your child would like. Having the chart helps to remind them and kids love the feeling of getting it right
Good luck and remember: when all else fails, bribe
Hate to break your heart [2008-06-23]
When I read the first part I thought that was an odd thing to say, especially since he keeps saying it. I would say to him why wouldn. I don't know much about the relationship (long distance-local). If (and I'm just assuming this is an if) he is long distance he might have a wife or girlfriend. You can't trust what he says if you can't see the situation with your own eyes. If he hasn't called there is definitely something wrong (hence I would start to believe he has another girlfirend or wife). Have you ever been to this persons home, seen where he lives, or any of that?
The second part of the message is what bothered me. When someone borrows money no matter how much you care about them no matter how much they borrow they should pay it back. I know you care a lot about this person, but to lend someone money is a very dangerous thing. I know from experience.
We loaned my BIL some money about 4 years ago. We helped him get out of some payday loans and I went through his budget very very carefully and spent almost 3 weeks constructing a budget for him to live on to including a separate bill for paying us back (a certain amount each month), but this budget also included some fun money for him - not a lot but would give him the means to go to a movie or grab a pizza once a week. Anyway...here it is 4 years later and he has only paid us back less than half of what he ows us. He keeps giving us the line I I love you guys a lot You know you can trust me I won. I keep getting these lines from him (and he's my BIL). My point I am saying is this is my BIL and he keeps giving me the same type of lines it sound like this person is giving you.
Please be very very cautious with this relationship and just remember, there are hundreds of other fish in the sea who you will meet and will fall in love with you and wonI hope you believe that.
So, I hate to break your heart but I think he is taking advantage of your kindness and has no intentions of anything further. If I was in your shoes I'd send this person an email ditching him, and remove the email from my contact list and have no further contact with him.
My DHTrust No One.
I was only about 12 when I was bitten, [2008-06-23]
and I'm still not afraid of snakes. In my new job we actually come across them now and then. We girls gather around and analyze whether we think it's poisonous. If we decide it's not, then I'll be the one to carry it down by the pond ... except the only one we've needed to move so far was bright copper in color, and I never picked up a copperhead-colored snake before, so we called the boss. He carried it without incident.
You could try a broom I guess, but [2008-06-22]
I've been bitten by a garter snake before and it was no big deal. They just have short teeth so they won't get fangs caught in you or anything.
Or you could try lifting him with tongs and putting him into a pillowcase.
He would slow down if your house was cold. That's all I can think of.
I got to watch a cat playing with a lizard last week. I felt bad for the lizard, but the cat sure was cute playing with it.
Ever say the wrong thing [2008-06-22]
Ever say the wrong thing, and you realize as your talking trying to say something that would make them feel better that that what your saying doesn’t quite sound right so you keep trying to explain and it just gets worse and worse.
Today I was talking to someone whose wife has cancer and she started chemo a few weeks ago. I’m always caring as my mom had cancer so I know a bit of what they are going through, but of course I don’t want to say that because it would sound as though what they are going through is not that important compared to what my mom went through (which of course is not true – I love both these people). Anyway…last night his wife passed out and they had to bring her to ER (she’s better and was released). He told me it gave him a scare and made him realize how fragile life is. I told him that’s true. He then was laughing and said something in regards to life isn’t forever and we all have to move on but nobody ever wants to (or something like that) and he was laughing about it (he’s not a very serious person and usually laughs at everything), and I told him that reminded me of a movie I saw called Kingdom of Heaven when someone said you don’t’ seem upset that I’ve killed your master and the guy said to him “it was his time to go”. Talk about knowing immediately that was one of the stupidest things I could have said and I’m sure sounded insensitive. So, I tried to think of something less equally stupid to say (if such a thing was possible). But I told him sometimes its really depressing typing reports all day because there are so many people with such serious illness that it just get depressing typing them all day. Then I was thinking to myself that that made it sound as though what she is going through isn’t as important as everyone else. Not quite sure if all this was in my mind as I’m sensitive to others feelings and always want to say the right things so they will feel better (even though it may not always come out that way). I ended the conversation letting him know that what they were going through is very hard and that I was glad his wife was better and tell her that I’m thinking of her and wishing them the best. He said in an upbeat tone, thanks I will. He didn’t seem upset, but it was just a very awkward conversation and I wanted to get off before I said anything else. I don’t think he took offense to what I was saying but in these circumstances you never know and it just proved to myself that from now on its better to keep my mouth shut and not sound stupid than to say anything that makes me look so. Has anyone else been in a similar situation and do you think I’m being oversensitive. From now on a simple concerned and understanding “uh-hum” will be in my vocabulary.
yep for up to an hour they can still bite you- sm [2008-06-22]
there was a story on TV a few months back about some guy in the middle of no where, staying at a remote cabin for a week (was getting picked up at pre-arranged date a week after his drop off there), on day 3 or 4 killed a snake by the house by cutting off its head, and then for some foolish reason decided to pick up the head which is when he got bit. By some miracle he did not die, came darn close though, if his ride hadn't come he would have died though.
Agree, I have trained quite a few dogs -sm [2008-06-22]
some just take longer than others, I have found though that they train a lot faster if there is another dog in the house that is older and housebroken. I have had huskies take 3 months to housebreak before. My last husky was about 10 weeks old when I got her and by some miracle she was trained in about a month, but we had 2 other dogs in the house and they helped teach her I think. I get to go through all this again in a year or two when my daughter gets a dog my DH promised her....I am not looking forward to it. She keeps changing her mind on what she wants, Taco bell dog (Chiwahwa, I know I am butchering the spelling), or a Jack Russell, or maybe a pug. So who knows, I like big dogs, have a big boy husky now and a chocolate lab. Just have to make sure in this case the dog it not too small or these two will end up killing it which would not be too cool. (my husky goes after small animals in the yard, not sure if he would be able to differentiate from a pet dog or a squirrel/possom). We are trying to wait until the husky passes before getting this new dog, and he will be 9 in 2 years so his time will be done or very close at that point (I have never had a husky live pass 9.5). ---But bottom line is patience in house training a dog, yes it is icky but no worse than changing a baby's diaper, and if you have had kids then you can get thru housebreaking a dog, they are a lot easier to take care of!
To Valerie...your post below about Pres. Bush [2008-06-21]
Ooookayyy..i won so you can HAVE him - hes all yours (i didn
First....If you live in the United States of America, he is also YOUR President.
Second....I am proud to call him MY President.
Third......You said you didn What is a creatrue?
Fourth.....Again, please stop calling OUR President of the United States childish names.
Thank you.
|
|
|