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I would have divorced a long time ago....sm [2008-11-21]
when my husband had a drug problem. I didn't because my son told me he would not come with me but that he would choose to stay with his dad. He was around 7 years old at the time. I couldn't leave my son. So I didn't leave. He is so close to his daddy. He would pick his dad drugs and all over me any day of the week and that hurt me very bad because I have always been a good mom. So I stayed. I guess God helped me though because my husband quit using drugs miraculously later and we are doing pretty good now.
same here! thought at the time it was [2008-11-20]
gonna be kill or git killed!
I saw a demo of the software on TV long time ago. sm [2008-11-17]
there was a slate-like appendage that you could draw on with a pencil-like tool. and then the software did remarkable things, but this was some time ago.
goodle it, research. you're bound to find a site with a demo.
I still get a couple loaf pans of it every year at butchering time [2008-11-15]
DH doesn't touch it but I love it. I grew up on it too.
I also grew up on Spam. Mom had a stove that had a pull out griddle above the oven and she would put spam and egss on there for a Tuesday night supper.
I have 2 cans of Spam in my pantry now. The ingredients state: Pork with ham, mechanically separated chicken, water , salt, modified potato starch, sugar, hickory smoke flavoring (I have the hickory smoke flavor), and sodiu nitrite. Opps. There's that bad word-sodium nitrite.
No, it was his first time at our house. [2008-11-13]
No, it was his first time at our house.
Yes. Took up a part-time job and having [2008-11-13]
100% of the income put into savings. Paying off my debt.
Not going to live in fear.
Not going to live with anyone else, either.
Maybe you could downsize on house and cars. ?
had the man been there the previous time with his partner? [2008-11-12]
//
Gabby, I am with you. I went for the first time in my life last summer. sm [2008-11-08]
I had a riot and came home $5 richer, so I was happy. I too was amazed at all the people there and this was on a Sunday afternoon. LOL. But I have to say the noise would drive me NUTS!!! Constant dinging, clanking, etc. I did have fun watching everybody and their various techniques for chunking in coins. I stayed on the cheap slots as there were acres of slot machines. I would go again in a heartbeat as I did have fun. And the food is good too. LOL.
My experience is if you are into people watching, a casino will give you HOURS of entertainment value.
Sorry, I was upset at the time I wrote the original post [2008-11-05]
Basically, I sent a voided Wal-Mart check to a creditor by mistake and they cashed it and the bank let it go through both times. I called them on it. I was thinking that someone must have found that check and cashed it again. At the time, I did not realize my mistake. They then cancelled the payment to Wal-Mart, don They added $30 to the original amount.
All the time and I was RN years ago. [2008-11-04]
3333
All the time - sm [2008-11-03]
I donmy MT Stars Board is.
I do all the time with DH...nm [2008-11-03]
nm
next time take a photograph [2008-10-31]
He needs reform school or an aide. I don't know why the school would let him get away with this. If I were them, I would be afraid of getting sued.
I have also typed for many pediatricians, but can't recall anything concerning fingers being bent backwards.
Cool. So glad for them. Long time coming(nm) [2008-10-30]
x
I should mention that it is very time [2008-10-30]
consuming and can be messy, but we had great success with it. I did it on Sat. morning so we would have plenty of time. I also used Danorex shampoo on them the night before I did the Cetaphil. Wet hair and massage in, cover head with plastic bag and let set for 20 mins, then rinse out. If they withstand the stinging from the shampoo, it will kill live lice. Then we did the Cetaphil treatment.
I should mention that it is very time [2008-10-30]
consuming and can be messy, but we had great success with it. I did it on Sat. morning so we would have plenty of time. I also used Danorex shampoo on them the night before I did the Cetaphil. Wet hair and massage in, cover head with plastic bag and let set for 20 mins, then rinse out. If they withstand the stinging from the shampoo, it will kill live lice. Then we did the Cetaphil treatment.
Third time is the charm! I put my baby as my avatar in my profile. [2008-10-30]
Man, I'm just not a techie!
oh no --50s? Time to put away the Daisy Dukes [2008-10-28]
nm
Sprinkle with baking soda and then vacuum [2008-10-28]
Works wonders.
Got one that bugs me every time - [2008-10-27]
I discussed this with she and her brother versus I discussed this with her and her brother.
Does anyone know if we'll be changing time?? sm [2008-10-27]
I thought it would Every Halloween it I haven't heard or seen anything about time change.
Last night Bravo had "The 100 Scariest Movies Of All Time" and number one was ...sm [2008-10-26]
Jaws!?!?! I didn The Exorcist and Audition are the scariest for me.
Christmas Story is my number one off all time - never get sick of that flick! nm [2008-10-25]
nm
I get them all the time...everyone loves them [2008-10-23]
@
Rachael Ray has a segment from time to time [2008-10-21]
on using the bottom of the bottle receipes (i.e. bar-be-q sauce, peanut butter, maple syrup) and I have used many of her ideas and been amazed at how far you can stretch a dollar that way. Go to her website, it will give you many ideas.
I've been there. [2008-11-22]
I don't believe in getting even - although, whew! I'm human. I've performed several mental castrations.
But through quiet observance, being stuck around this person albeit distant, I learned I didn't have to stoop. Life took care of that time and time again with the fool.
Talk it out with the right person, cry it out, write it out as much as you can; key word is out. Find an outlet, running, drawing; don't bury it within.
We don't do christmas lights. Instead we [2008-11-22]
do halloween decorations. We have more fun with that and it helps that halloween usually falls during a time when our energy bills are normally the lowest for the year.
Everyone seems [2008-11-22]
pretty happy. It doesn't seem prurient. I've been in favor of other situations in which people are free to develop on an internal time clock rather than one imposed externally & in that regard there's probably something to this, but the siblings following the first probably got the idea to continue for a long time from watching, so there's definitely a bias there.
Would be interesting for someone to design a study comparing long-time thumb-suckers with children weaned at a later age. This woman would probably say that the experience of breastfeeding can't be duplicated or substituted with a bottle or a plastic nipple because the emotional part of it would be lost. I don't know. I guess it depends on the family involved. I remember on Six Feet Under, how Lisa & Nate were letting Maya sleep in their bed until she decided she didn't want to any more. I think there's just a whole movement out there comprised of people with similar ideas, & until someone does a long-term study, I guess I'd have to say any suggestion that it's out-&-out wrong is just conjecture or has a cultural bias.
If your mom and dad just divorced this year, have you ever thought of depression? sm [2008-11-22]
Maybe your dad is going through a real hard adjustment to his new life and could use a little help or boost from you instead of a cold shoulder. Sounds to me like he might just be in some major depression as his life has had a drastic change. Reach out to him and help him in his time of need. Sure he is an adult, but everyone can walk on hard times with major traumatic events going on in their life and he may just lack desire to care due to his depression.
Help is a safety net you have paid for sm [2008-11-21]
Food stamps are a safety net we all pay for, all forms of public assistance are things we have been paying for all along. TAKE the help you need! Do move closer to family if you possibly can.
I have been in your shoes myself. I lost my home to foreclosure 4 years ago because of having a near-fatal drug interaction and losing my job of nearly 7 years. I made a couple of moves and finally ended up in a small town out of state from where I had lived for 30 years. I lived with a close friend for about 9 months and had the opportunity to buy a mobile home for $3000. The people I bought it from said I could make payments and I was able to pay it off in 5 months. It needed a lot of work and it has gotten it, most of which I have done myself. This project really helped me to regain parts of myself I had lost. It gave me a reason to get up and get going on my days off. I turned this ugly old thing into a lovely, comfortable home I cherish. I have lost about 50-60 lbs since living here and I have brought the idea of vastly cutting expenses in line with making more money. The end result is that I am very well off financially, better than in my entire life.
DO get medication to help you if you can. I didn't have medication to help because I am allergic to every psychotropic in existence. I did this by pulling myself up by the boot straps, but if I could have had help, I would have. There IS a brighter future out there. You CAN have that brighter future because you DESERVE IT. That said, no one expects you to get there alone!!!
Don't be embarrassed to ask and receive help. You will be able to help others later. Years ago, when my kids were young, I was a single parent, no support and it was Christmas time. My kids didn't even have adequate clothing or food. A neighbor I hardly knew handed me a Christmas card. Inside was a $100 gift card to K-Mart. She said that many years before that, she had been in my shoes and someone had given her $100 one Christmas, she was now paying this forward to me. The only provision was that I return this favor when I could, and that I bought something for myself too because I deserve nice things for my hard work. It was a turning point for me. I have been more of a giver since. Although I could have paid this back last year, I didn't know anyone who would appropriately benefit. This year, I do and I had to tell her that I was going to do this and why. She cried and felt embarrassed because, she said, she was usually in the position to give and it hurt a little to receive. I reminded her that she was GIVING me the gift of giving with pleasure.
Others are going to give to you with pleasure, love, friendship and concern for your well being. TAKE IT. One day you'll post back here about how good things are and I'll want to hear it.
I usually do a lot of handmade gifts. This year each kid gets $100 they are all grown sm [2008-11-21]
I make my oldest son boxer shorts, he only likes the ones I make. My other son wanted a robe and matching PJ pants. Daughter wanted a couple of outfits and a denim jacket. My mom wanted something I had knitted up for her. Stepdad just wants to be remembered. My brother won't take anything from me, so no problem there. I will do some small things for my friends, but I won't spend $500 total, even with giving the 3 kids $100 each. I have NEVER spent that much on Christmas!
I have worked like a dog all year, but I have had no time to do these things they think they want.
I would have divorced a long time ago....sm [2008-11-21]
when my husband had a drug problem. I didn't because my son told me he would not come with me but that he would choose to stay with his dad. He was around 7 years old at the time. I couldn't leave my son. So I didn't leave. He is so close to his daddy. He would pick his dad drugs and all over me any day of the week and that hurt me very bad because I have always been a good mom. So I stayed. I guess God helped me though because my husband quit using drugs miraculously later and we are doing pretty good now.
Just check all the ads in the newspapers. [2008-11-21]
Most stores have special coupons for early birds on Friday morning. Around here, stores open around 4 a.m. and last year we got there at 3 and stood in line in the cold just waiting to get in. Good luck. Don so unless you are first in line at those places you are usually out of luck. I know last year, people were in line at Best Buy at 2 a.m. waiting for it to open at 5.
I'm a virgin, help a first timer out .. [2008-11-21]
BLACK FRIDAY Shopper's!!!!
Ive NEVER in my life shopped on Black Friday, it used to be of no interest, then it got interesting for awhile, but DH hated the idea and I dont shop without him unless I absolutely have to and/or dying to get out, and now the interest is back with DH on my side! So I am excited, or should I be frightened, is it a true mad house?
I need some tips and info. Do you have any tips for a 1st Timer??
What time do you get at the store? Do you have to get a coupon or something to be allowed IN? If so, where do you get these coupons?
What time do stores typically open? What times do they take the sale prices down, is it usually an all day thing, or an end at lunch type of thing?
And most important of all. I am a fan of the old fashioned way..... newspaper ads to see who has what deal. Where do you get this? Does it come out THIS Weekend or on Thanksgiving Day??
Thanks so much!!!!
We use a timer [2008-11-21]
We use a time like a few have mentioned here already and only keep them on for about 3 hours. If we didn't have kids we probably wouldn't do as much decorating as we do, but we go all out, and I could never do without lights just yet.
Sounds very much like to do with RAM or HDD [2008-11-21]
These two components are ones that make the computer freeze......the life of RAM and HDD depends on the usage, so 3 years can be quite some time...sorry, if this does not help you! Just another suggestion
How exciting for you -- sm [2008-11-21]
I My mom always drug me out an hour before the stores opened.
The ads usually come out in Thursday In the past, I Get the paper and makea game plan. Some stores open an hour or 2 later than others, so you may be able to get to both in time for the specials you Wal-Mart generally has a lot of specials, especially in the toys dept. Our Wal-Mart gives you a map when you enter to tell you where each BF special is located in the store. They put some stuff in strange places -- like TVs in the meat dept, computers in dairy, etc. It Ask the Wal-Mart greeter when you enter. Our Wal-Mart is also open 24 hours, as are most, which means no waiting outside. We usually arrive an hour before the sales start so we can be in position for the item. Obviously, the most-sought after items are electronics, so be there early if you
Target is 1 of my favorite places because their specials run all weekend, not just until 11 a.m. (I hope it They usually open an hour after Wal-Mart. I usually head there second because even though the specials run all weekend, they do run out of stock.
Kohl The cash can be redeemed usually starting the Sunday after Black Friday.
Don If there
General advise: Wear comfortable shoes. Be polite to others, but don If you got there first, it Make sure you and DH have cell phones so you can communicate if you get separated. Most importantly, HAVE FUN!!!!
Let us know how you make out afterwards.
Don't stay angry, instead get EVEN. [2008-11-21]
been there, done that. no need to be in a hurry, either. if you take months or even years to get even, you have just that much more time to come up with something truly memorable.
or, you can do something swift and simple, like blocking their emails on your pc as spam.
Here's my problem....sm [2008-11-21]
My dad is irresponsible and is in financial debt and doom. There is no way he can make the money to pay the bills he has accumulated. He has borrowed money he shouldnt have. Well the situation is... He has been knowing if he didn He refused to pay it. Every time he would get acheck he wouldn Well he kept not paying it for 2 months. Well yesterday they turned them out. It is freezing here. It is going to be in the 20s tonight. He said I don Well he was told and told to pay it and wouldn So now what does he do? As soon as he gets off work he comes to my house cause he don I can So I can He also said he had no money for food because he had to use it all for diesal for his dump truck. So I offered him food too. He also rumages through my cabinets for snacks. I feel like I am the parent and he is the child. My husband drives a big truck and he has been gone. When I tell him what is going on he gets aggravated because he is sitting at our house and all. He said he is a grown man and needs to step up and take care of himself but he is my dad and I can My husband will be home either late tonight or first thing in the morning and this is not going to go over too well with him. I am at a loss.
we're s'posed to believe this new guy is her husband? [2008-11-21]
i set the DVR, won is the season ending, getting all these new players? i hope they make it believable...
He is 60 years old...sm [2008-11-21]
And acts like he is 2. He doesnI am not his babysitter. He is a grown man and he needs to act like it. Social service doesn't need to help him. The man makes decent money. He just won't take responsibity to pay his bills and has too many at that. He needs to thin them out. For instance, he has 2 new model trucks. He does not need 2 trucks but he WANTS both of them. But a light bill is one of your most important bills. And I for a fact know he had the money to pay it and didn't. I even told him you better go pay that electric bill. He wouldn't. I have never seen anyone who was quite like him. I love my dad and don't want to hurt him but he is making things very hard for me right now. I can't babysit him anymore. He is more than welcome to come visit me as often as he wants. He can come by everyday if he wants. But then there is a time to leave and go home. I have a family and I know I wouldnt like it if my husbands dad did this. I would not be happy at all. I am not happy about my father doing it but what do you do? Tell him get out?
observation [2008-11-21]
Sounds like a good time to call mom and get some tips.
black friday [2008-11-20]
I went one time...and won I guess it would be better if I had someone to go with, but even then it gets crazy! Good luck to you! I will stay at home on Black Friday shop online!
According to DH, our budget is $1,000 [2008-11-20]
But more likely I We have 3 kids. We usually get them 1 big gift to share and then round it out with smaller gifts. This year, they It
The breakdown of the other $350:
Parents $150, Grandma $25, Gift Exchange $60, Siblings (from my kids $20, Niece/nephew: $40, Teacher Gifts $30, Student Gifts: $15.
The remaining $30 will go to Toys for Tots! Each of my kids like to pick out a $10 gift to put in.
I have 3 siblings and 1 that My brother that Of course, my 2 unmarried siblings also buy small gifts for my children, so we always get them a little something from them -- usually lottery tickets or a gas card for Sheetz. $10 used to fill We do our exchange party on Christmas Eve. It keeps the kids entertained and gives them a little preview of what I have to say I enjoy Christmas Eve more than Christmas Day. It
Teacher gifts kill me. It I usually go for a coffee mug with a Christmas scene or teacher saying on it and fill it with candy.
Of course, DH thinks I do all this for Christmas for $1000, but why tell him and spoil it? We do a Christmas Club for $1000 every year and I just buy the other stuff here and there.
We already got our Christmas gifts for ourselves -- a 46-inch LCD TV for DHand a Dooney Bourke purse with matching wallet for me.
Now you all got me excited again about shopping next week. I I always wait until the day before Thanksgiving to do that so I know I won
For those of you below who posted that you don Let me just say that I don I sometimes snag a deal or 2, but I learned a long time ago not to wait until Black Friday to get the most sought after items. Best to get them in Sept or Oct.
Do any of you have a spouse [2008-11-20]
who can How do you work it out? Are you just stuck always being the bad guy?
Unfortunately, the entire United States is having a difficult financial time. It is obviously not just our household. We have cut back everywhere we can, and I mean everywhere. Our families are having difficult problems as well. We also have an ex-spouse and have had unexpected increases in child support, etc. recently along with unexpected additional expenses where this is concerned. Basically, the child needs new glasses, etc. even though the child really doesn It just seems like it is one thing after another and I know it is for everyone, although the circumstances may be slightly different.
My problem is that I have been telling my husband for months that this was coming, along with Christmas, birthday, etc. He hasn Although we have cut back on many things, on my initiative, it just has not sunk in for him until now...when everything finalized and we dont To top this off, he can Ibad guy because he is ok with all of it although he admits he has no idea where the money is going to come from. I have been upfront with my family and when people ask me but is it too much to ask that he do the same? I dont But of course he wants to constantly remind me (the cheap skate and tight-a$$) to cut back on groceries, etc. which I cannot possibly do any more than I have already. We have nothing left in savings. We have no Christmas fund.
I I donI told you so but I did tell him and he had no concerns until now...when we are seemingly headed towards financial trouble. I have been working OT but his OT has been cut indefinitely from his employer. I I must say he doesn't buy things for himself..its just the piddling away of $20 here and $20 there on top of our already mounting unexpected expenses.
My husband is oblivious to our finances [2008-11-20]
Sometimes that It sounds like maybe your husband is too proud to tell his family that he can I I would suggest talking to the leader of his family, the person who hosts the get-togethers, and let them know that you do the finances and you just don It doesn I would certainly let your husband know that you are going to say something beforehand, but he doesn
I For birthdays, we take the time to call and wish that person a happy birthday. We don My brother lives about 2 hours away, so we don Unless his family is loaded, I'm sure they'll understand.
As for the glasses, I just took my son for new glasses yesterday. The eye doctor said he needs a new prescription, but I asked if just the lenses could be replaced and the frames reused. He said absolutely. Our insurance covers new frames, lenses and the exam, but my son has a tendency to break things at the most inopportune time. We just bought him these glasses in June because he broke them and according to the insurance, it wasn Now that he is eligible for everything new, we asked for just the lenses. If he breaks his frames later in the year, we can just get new frames (covered by insurance) and pop the lenses in. The only problem there would be is they discontinue his frames because the new lenses probably wouldn So, something to consider here is, if your stepchild needs a new prescription and already has glasses, then I would check with your lawyer to see if you can just buy new lenses for the current frames. The frames are what normally cost the most anyway.
there is a parallel universe! [2008-11-20]
Depressed is the right word for what he feels, so you can shut your mouth right now. This is all about guilt.
I am a step-mom too and I swear you are telling my story down to the glasses!
I would love to tell you that you are in this together and partners, etc., but the truth is my husband did not come around until he got a good job, a really good job that had status and paid a lot of money, and he had to do that all on his own. I let him buy expensive clothes, because for some reason, every time he got a raise it co-incided with buying a nicer suit or tie, so you can help him there.
All the nightmarish gift exchanges, arguments about buying lotto tickets, not eating out, step-kids, all the horrific details and arguments just came down to him deciding to step up. Then it all just went away, the depression, the lotto tickets, and the give away the farm stuff too.
Good luck to you! Don't give up on him!
Anyone go through a divorce w/younger kids? sm [2008-11-20]
Iit just isn while I have always felt you don't throw around the word divorce unless you mean it. Well, I mean it now. I gave him an ultimatum - straighten himself out or I leave with the kids. I am not going to go through 5 years of this again. It is affecting the kids, and my son is acting out to the point of saying he wishes he had never been born. I am giving my husband until after Christmas to decide what he is going to do, and if he does not value our marriage more than his alcohol, I am moving out of state. This is not to keep him away from the kids but because my parents (divorced also) are in a different state than I am and I have no family at all here.
Has anyone had to make a decision like this? I donno other options. He refuses to go to counseling or to see a doctor about what I am positive is depression. Any tips or suggestions? Sorry to dump on everyone like this, thanks for reading.
I need some help here -- [2008-11-20]
I am so depressed... I don
I just filed bankruptcy 2 years ago because of this job. My income changed so drastically that I lost everything. My car, my home, all of it.I just got things back on track earlier this year and now this crap has to start all over again. I do not foresee being able to make my rent payments on my new house that I just moved into, my cable will be turned off tonight at midnight for nonpayment, I have an old car now and everything keeps tearing up on it and I cannot afford to fix it, I just looked in my closet and I have no clothes to wear anymore, I have gained 50 pounds, I cry all the time, I am by myself all the time in this house, my family all live about 50 miles from me, so it is not affordable to drive there all the time, I have no friends, and as you can tell, I am seriously DEPRESSED!!!
I don I have done everything. I have no life outside of my home anymore. I never go out, I never take trips, my 5 year old grandson just this weekend asked me why I did not buy him a birthday present for his birthday last month (no money) and Christmas is coming up, which of course will be more of the same since there is no money...
Sorry to unload, just needed somewhere to go for a minute...
make a call [2008-11-20]
Look in the phone book under Alcoholics Anonymous and call the central office. Tell them you need someone to make a 12-step call. Someone from your local area who is in AA will come over to your house and talk to your husband and you can leave with the kids during this time. By the time you get back, your husband will have decided whether or not he will sober up. Usually the person he talked to will assume responsibility for taking him to the meetings or finding someone who will sponsor him. So you are off the hook at this point.
On the other hand, he may decide no thanks and then you will have your real answer.
AA is free and pretty crowded with new people around the holidays, so the timing is good. The average age of a person coming into AA is 25 to 45, so there should be plenty of people for him to talk to.
At the same meeting place there should be meetings for you called Al-Anon and for your son called Alateen.
Good Luck!
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