Private vs state college.

in my state, pa, there was some controversy about this [2008-12-01]
and whether people would also need an auctioneer's license to do this. i'm not sure what became of it.

I was an animal science major in college and... [2008-11-27]
my poultry professor said that fresher eggs are harder to peel. The problem is that you can't tell from the store which the older eggs are because when they expire, they just repackage them with newer dates and send them back out because they only go bad if there is a defect in the shell.

moving out of state [2008-11-21]
Check your divorce laws in your states. Many states will not let you or your (ex) spouse move out of state without permission of the other. Some even have a mileage radius. I think it's to keep both parents close to the kids and not having one parent run far away so the other can't ever see the kids again. My kids were 5 and 1 when I was in the process of getting divorced, and I moved out of state before I realized this. Fortunately my ex realized and understood the need for me and the kids to be close to my family for support, so it was written in the papers that it was okay for me to move out of state and he signed it.

Private counseling [2008-11-21]
Go to a private counselor yourself if he wonANONYMOUS programs attract those who do not get it and go around town blabbing your business, ruining your lives even moreso. Yes, they save lives but they often ruin them with their gossip, even the name gossip hisses, it ruins lives, topples marriages, loses jobs. Be sure before you let these people into your personal, private lives and your homes. Sometimes private, closed-door counseling is the best way to go. Then if you are both comfortable with going public that is your own personal decision. Beware of who you let into your life. If you were going to take a plane ride you would want to know the pilot.

$1.69 here on the west side of the state. nm [2008-11-21]
nm

What kind of college degree? [2008-11-09]
I can't believe a degree would be useless!

Not an option in my backwards state. [2008-11-05]
I would defintely vote for it to be decriminalized. Why should that be illegal when alcohol is legal and much more dangerous?

My state you yield to the person to the left [2008-10-14]
nm

In my state you yield to the car on your right. - nm [2008-10-14]
CA

College fund? Yeah ah, what's that? [2008-10-13]
pay their own way. College for my kids is the least of my worries. I am just trying to keep food on the table and the bills paid that keep going up and up. No, I don The hospital I came from that outsourced my job overseas just laid off 30 people last week. It Job hunting? Well let's just say if you can find one that pays more, then go for it, but there's always that learning curve. Thank God I work from home and find no need to purchase new attire for the season. We haven Our salary is $80,000.00 a year combined, and we still live paycheck to paycheck basically with 2 kids to clothe and feed. Christmas? I So, not all is me, me, me, now, now, now... Am I blessed? Yes, I am. We both have jobs and an income and healthcare. Vacation and college????? Privileges as far as I If my kid wants a college education, he He'll have a place to live (right here).

Try community college first sm [2008-10-07]
It was not cool for my kids to go to college locally, so we literally wasted good money on out-of-state high brow -- only to find unhappiness at missing the friends, girlfriends, etc. One ended up back in state at a good university at a much less drain on our budget and he is now a professor there. Canreal stuff such as grad school, etc., which is almost imperative today to compete. Good luck!!!

College search - For those of you who have had experience - [2008-10-06]
In your opinion, is it more fruitful to go on an open house when all the departments are out there with handouts and such, or on individual or small group appointments with maybe a little more one-on-one? I'm overwhelmed already, and we've only been to two colleges!

Both of my sons are in college now. [2008-10-06]
It's very easy to become overwhelmed quickly during the search. My husband and I approached the process a little differently. We didn't do anything like the other parents and high school juniors/seniors were doing. We did pretty much... well nothing. We let our kids lead in the process. We didn't even look at the applications unless our sons asked us to. We felt that our job was to guide them and to keep them from getting caught up in the college search mania that seems to grip everyone during those last two years in high school. My husband and I went to the same, very large university (Temple U). Back all those years ago, it just seemed that there wasncollege experience for us was living at home and going to school. College was more of a practical work-and-study experience for us. And we received very good educations. Fast forward to our own children. We told both of our sons that they should think of their college experience as the preliminary work for their careers. They didnexperience. Our oldest son was not quite sure what he wanted to do, so he wisely chose to spend a year at the local community college. We were thrilled! It cost us less than his high school tuition! He checked out different options and settled on a meteorology major. With that decided, he discovered that there was only one school that we could afford and that had a great program. He applied, was accepted, and his community college credits transferred. He is now a junior. Our younger son wants to be an engineer, though heoptions and fits. Why such a long post that seems a bit off-topic? Well, because I see so many people stress over this decision. It really isn't the end of the world. It's four short years of a person's life. They're important years, to be sure. But they don't have to be make or break years. Most college students will change majors at some point, many will transfer to other schools. These decisions can be re-made later on. You are in the market for a product, just as if you were shopping for a car or other big ticket item. Try to keep calm about it so that your student doesn't pick up on the stress. It is stressful, but if you keep it all in perspective, the stress doesn't have to feel so overwhelming. And for the short answer: We liked visiting the schools at open house to get a general feel for the place. At that point you can usually tell if the school is a viable option or not. If not, no reason to revisit. If yes, then visit again and make an appointment for a personal tour and/or interview. Don't worry! You'll survive!

That is what stinks about private schools - sm [2008-10-01]
my kids used to attend private school, one reason I pulled them out was this one girl who bullied everyone, she was allowed to hurt kids, over and over again because the school wanted the tuition money and the father donated thousands of dollars in money, time, and construction labor to the school, and they were constantly giving things just so their daughter would not get kicked out. After trying to stangle someone the parents were finally told they had to get the girl some help and now she is on medication, but it took 4 years before the school did anything. The girl is still there, friendless basically, all the kids in her class cannot stand her, and she is just a pain in general. It is very sad in a way, if the parents had gotten her help a lot sooner she probably would not have allienated all the kids in her class (20 or so).

you won't loose your cool if you state the facts [2008-09-30]
just as you did. I have found in my life that everyone has to listen to me and take me seriously if I use no profanity what so ever (and don Of course you should be upset, your child was assaulted by a bully. I Call her up, make her feel lousy for raising such a brute of a daughter. Praise your child for being so wonderful. Unfortunately, all we can tell our little ones is that the world is full of mean, angry others and we are so blessed to not have to behave that way. Count your blessings for your sweet son, just love him and hug him all that much more.

State jobs....... [2008-09-24]
Problem is with state jobs the application process lasts for a good period of time, so he needs to review the cut off date for applications. It could possibly be another couple of weeks before the cut off. But, state jobs are horribly slow in replying to the applicants. I would give it this week, check the cut off date for applicants, and then call them and inquire if the position has been filled. At least he will know then.

I don't know what state you're in or if that [2008-09-24]
makes a different but when my husband was hired by the state, he interviewed in July and didn First off, as someone else mentioned below, it depends on what the closing date is. Whether they have 3 applicants or not to interview doesn it goes by the closing date. They legally cannot make their choice until the position is closed. After the closing date, they will do an extensive background check before notifying the chosen applicant. My husband They only check the top choice If his/her background check, doesn After the chosen one You go through a bunch of blood work and a physical exam and a TB test. Then finally, you get a start date. Depending on the type of facility, he may need to go for training. My husband works for the state pen and had to go for 6 weeks of defensive training. All in all, it The waiting is agony, but if he gets the job, it The benefits are unbeatable. Good luck -- hope your hubs gets it!!!

so with the current state of the economy [2008-09-20]
Banks aren Then when the economy turns back around I can sell my property. Better than putting money in the bank!

Check with your state's Attorney General's office. [2008-09-12]
NM

That's the way the advanced classes are run here in New York State [2008-09-10]
She took 9th grade classes last year and she's taking 10th grade classes this year with the exception of the science classes where they bump you up to 12th grade. She's also taking geometry and loves it so far. (As the school year goes on things may change).

college was definitely wasted on me [2008-09-09]
First I tried sociology, then quit to get married. Then I tried nursing school but couldn't deal with it anymore, so I purposefully got pregnant so I could quit in my last semester of school (first trimester of the pregnancy). I'm just not smart enough for that stuff anyway.

I depends on the person/student. Not everyone is cut out for college. [2008-09-08]
And it would sure help if the local school systems would actually TEACH things like English grammar, etc. Isn't that more important than reading Hemingway?

Is College Worth It? [2008-09-08]
As parents pack their youngsters off to college, they might ask themselves whether itAmerica The U.S. Department of Education statistics show that 76 out of 100 students who graduate in the bottom 40 percent of their high school class do not graduate from college, even if they spend eight and a half years in college. That's even with colleges having dumbed down classes to accommodate such students. Only 23 percent of the 1.3 million students who took the ACT college entrance examinations in 2007 were prepared to do college-level study in math, English and science. Even though a majority of students are grossly under-prepared to do college-level work, each year colleges admit hundreds of thousands of such students. While colleges have strong financial motives to admit unsuccessful students, for failing students the experience can be devastating. They often leave with their families, or themselves, having piled up thousands of dollars in debt. There is possibly trauma and poor self-esteem for having failed, and perhaps embarrassment for their families. Dr. Nemko says that worst of all is that few of these former college students, having spent thousands of dollars, wind up in a job that required a college education. It's not uncommon to find them driving a taxi, working at a restaurant or department store, performing some other job that they could have had as a high school graduate or dropout. What about students who are prepared for college? First, only 40 percent of each year 45 percent never graduate at all. Often, having a college degree does not mean much. According to a 2006 Pew Charitable Trusts study, 50 percent of college seniors failed a test that required them to interpret a table about exercise and blood pressure, understand the arguments of newspaper editorials, and compare credit card offers. About 20 percent of college seniors did not have the quantitative skills to estimate if their car had enough gas to get to the gas station. According a recent National Assessment of Adult Literacy, the percentage of college graduates proficient in prose literacy has declined from 40 percent to 31 percent within the past decade. Employers report that many college graduates lack the basic skills of critical thinking, writing and problem-solving. Colleges are in business. Students are a cost. Research is a profit center. When colleges boast about having this professor who has won a science award or that professor who has won the Nobel Prize, very often an undergraduate student will never be taught by that professor. It is a bait and switch tactic and very often your youngster will take classes not taught by a professor but taught in large classes by a graduate student. Faculty who bring in large grants are more highly valued than faculty who teach well. Teaching excellence is so often undervalued that the late Ernest Boyer, vice president for Carnegie Foundation for the Advancement of Teaching, quipped that, Winning the campus teaching award is the kiss of death when it comes to tenure. Parents and taxpayers cough up billions upon billions of dollars to the nationbait and switch, confer fraudulent degrees and engage in other practices that would bring legal sanctions if done by any other business. There is little or no oversight of the nationChoosing the Right College (http://isi.org/college_guide/choosing_right_college.html).

I realize this is a private matter, but [2008-08-24]
is there someone close to the both of you that could be present when you tell him. Ordinarily, I would recommend meeting him in a public place, but in this case, since it is a financial affair, I wouldn However, if there is someone you are both close to, perhaps you could have them present (even if only in the other room) while you tell him. Another possibility may be to discuss this with your in-laws first. Again, I wouldn Depending on their reaction, perhaps you could all sit down together and they could help you work this out. If all else fails, call your attorney and schedule a meeting where he will mediate. I would not tell this man alone in person. It doesna safe thing to do.

in state of stupidity nm [2008-08-19]
x

These 10 things definitely ain't right: [2008-12-01]
1) MTSOs who want people with top-notch skills and experience, but don't want to pay them what that skill is worth. 2) HMO's: So-called *health-maintenance-organizations* --yet they spend every minute and every dime of their far-too-large profits on denying healthcare, meds and procedures to their patients. These organizations have ruined American healthcare, and many American lives. HMO's have been a con-game since their inception. 3) The Bailouts: Giving money to companies who can too bad for the rest of you.* Then the Big Three show up in DC to beg for a handout, and fly there in private Lear jets. My answer to them would be, *I too bad for the rest of you.* 4) Apartment managers that won't allow even a single quiet, well-behaved pet, but will rent to people with continually screaming small children, and out-of-control older children and teens. Give me the pets for neighbors, ANY day. 5) Businesses that give an age-discount to absolutely everything that walks, runs or flies, but not to the middle-aged middle-class, who need it the most. Take the ski-industry: Young children ski for next-to-nothing, and sometimes nothing. There is a Teen Discount. There is a Student Discount for college kids. There I'll probably never be old enough - it's a carrot-on-a-stick, always just out of reach.) There are even corporate (UGH) discounts. But for those in my age group, who barely make ends meet but like to go up once a year for a couple days of bliss, there is NOTHING. 6) Travel-lodging deals that are always based on double or quadruple occupancy. What about singles? NOTHING. 7) TV commercials that are about a million decibels louder than the regular shows. Why can't it all be the same volume? Same with online newscasts. THEIR commercials will blow your eardrums out if you aren't quick enough turning down the volume before they start. 8) Surround-sound: Everything is too loud, already! Why do we need it coming at us from 4 directions? Why do people living in tiny apartments feel they need it? I've lost count of how many fights I've had with neighbors over this issue. Same with movies and music concerts. Why do they feel we need to feel the music in our SPLEENS? I went to Universal Amphitheater last week. (Now named something else). There is actually a sign outside warning that the decibel level inside might damage your hearing! (?!?!?!) Why do they need this? (To avoid lawsuits, obviously). If it's so loud you have to post a warning sign outside the entrance, then DUH.... it's TOO LOUD! 9) Banks that charge you a fee to use their ATM. They (I haven't actually been INSIDE a bank in YEARS).... and they want to charge US for using the machines instead of the tellers? Forget it. I won't give those banks my business. 10) The Post Office: Talk about rewarding slow, inept performance! The worse their employees are, the longer they seem to stay there. I'd rather have a root canal than go to a P.O. during the holiday season.

Thanksgiving [2008-11-29]
1939 to 1940 Abraham Lincoln href=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franklin_D._Roosevelt>Franklin D. Roosevelt broke with this tradition. November had five Thursdays that year, and Roosevelt declared the fourth Thursday as Thanksgiving rather than the fifth one. In 1940, in which November had four Thursdays, he declared the third one as Thanksgiving. Although many popular histories state otherwise, he made clear that his plan was to establish it on the next-to-last Thursday in the month instead of the last one. With the country still in the midst of The Great Depression, Roosevelt thought an earlier Thanksgiving would give merchants a longer period to sell goods before Christmas. Increasing profits and spending during this period, Roosevelt hoped, would help bring the country out of the Depression. At the time, advertising goods for Christmas before Thanksgiving was considered inappropriate.

Wal-Mart employee [2008-11-28]
I read about that as well - pitifully sad. Shows the state of manners and common decency in this country. If they ever find out who it was who incited this, they should get the book thrown at them! That is one of the reasons why I shop online the majority of the time...

Take a sewing class, and take the machine - sm [2008-11-26]
with you. There you will learn how to use it and how to sew too. I have been sewing since I took home-ec in 7th grade. I have a Singer that is about 20 years old or more. It is a pretty basic one with about 12 different stitch types. Have never had an issue. Sounds like you donhow to sew class. Call a local craft store and see what they offer. Even one private lesson would probably do you a world of good. Good luck.

My oldest daughter had nothing but "boy" [2008-11-26]
friends throughout high school. Really, guys are a lot nicer than boys most of hte time. She has a couple of good girl friends, but I actually liked the guys hanging around the house. Now that she is in college, all she brings home are her guy friends and they all hang out with her and her boyfriend. I really would not worry if her friends are guys, at least she has friends she feels comfortable with having hang out at your house.

What a wonderful person you are [2008-11-25]
To think about taking in and caring for animals the way you do. I'm the same exact way. I saw you had 2 Maine coons. I take it you live in the state of Maine? If so, I love it there. I grew up in CT. Anyway... please, please, please go get him or her. With the winter coming I'd hate to think of any animal outside in the cold. Your deck would provide shelter for the harsh winter, and you said you'd provide food, a warm place to lseep and vet care. That is so wonderful and what makes you a wonderful person. You know you have 4 inside cats, so what's another one. Cats are a bundle of joy. I wish our cat would get along with other cats, but she doesn't. She was abandoned and we took her in (or rather she adopted us). If you have cats already I'm sure your husband is a very kind person and cares deeply too and I'm sure he wouldn't mind just one more little kitty. For your own conscious and well being I would take the kitty in. Otherwise you will always worry about her/him all the time and wonder if he's cold or hungry and what is happening to him. P.S. - my dad took in stray cats and he ended up with 24 cats (mostly outside). He said there was no way he would ever consciously let a cat suffer from the cold or be hungry or lonely. Over time some coyotes got some and now he is down to 7 cats and he loves them all.

What would you think? [2008-11-24]
Here Best friend and neighbor from kindergarten through highschool. Grew apart with college but stayed in touch. After college I moved out of state, she moved back in state - still stay in touch and email regularly. I see her every time I am in town, if she is available. She is got married in November and eloped in Jamaica. She is having a reception in December. I planned to come to the reception, take my stepchild out of school, etc. only for this reason and its on a Friday so its a 4-day weekendtodrive there.I am pregnant and not able to travel after the holidays. My family decided to throw me a shower there that same weekend because I really canafford to go down again. They specifically planned it for Saturday night so she would be able to make it after her festivities Friday and any of her family leaving on Sunday. So I saw her recently when I went for a visit and she said she wouldn She then gives me a gift, not wrapped, obviously thrown together and tells me that she picked it up quickly on her way to meet me because she won't be able to make the shower. It When I got married she sent me nothing, not even a card but she was just out of college. I had planned to give her a $50 gift for her wedding. I received a $10, maybe $20 baby gift of which 1 outfit is the wrong gender. She was well aware we know what were are having. This is my first baby. My feelings are conflicted on this but the more I think about it, the more upset I get. I just dont Is it truely that she is just wrapped up in herself right now and the marriage moment and happily every after and (after almost 10 years) I am over the marriage thing being some huge, happy,perfect day and realize there is more to life? I feel like she could have atleast planned to stop by the shower for 10 minutes and I wouldn Or she could have even told me she planned to come and then couldn Sorry this is getting long. I just can Am I clinging to a friendship that is not there?

I think the friendship indeed is still there... but [2008-11-24]
That is all there is to it. I am sure in her heart your friend loves you as much as you love her. It is just that, unfortunately in my experience, it is difficult to keep a friendship life-long to the same degree it was when you knew each other and lived closeby. The same thing happened to me and my best friend. We were BFF through first grade until after high school. I lost touch, but eventually visited her at an event after college, but we barely talked. I thought after we did not have the same friendship anymore, or she did not feel the way I did as in BFF. But, looking back, I realized we just grew apart and grew up. I still think of her often, and we have indeed lost touch, but I know to each other we will always be each other's best friend in memory and in our heart. Just let go a little bit and please don't blame her or you. Please don't dwell on if you gave each other material items or not or if she did not think enough to give you something up to your expectations. The fact is you have given each other something priceless, a memory in your heart and mind which will last forever and you can't put a price on that. If she is moving away in life, or by the things she does, please don't feel bad. It is not you. It is life. Enjoy the fact that you have not lost touch. And even if you do, after you let go of any expectations, still continue to love her as you always have. Because you and she I am sure will always have what you had and nothing can change that. Now go and enjoy your baby, and your marriage and your life, and keep your feelings the same tucked away in your heart. Don't let time moving on ever ruin that! Just my 2c. All the best to you!

I have a BFA too, in metals though-sm [2008-11-24]
went in for design originally then got into metals work, jewelry, functional art stuff, unfornately you have to either make sometime mainstream that starts a fad and keep it fresh all the time, or die basically. I have known a few successful jewelers (worked for one of them) who just kind of fade out after a few years. I never hit it big, did so some good shows (juried only), never made a lot, had reps who peddled my stuff to local galleries for me, but have not done that in quite a while. Neighbor wants me to go with her and split costs at local craft fairs, but I really have never made any money that way. I love crafts though, into crochet though don't have the time for it. Recently got a very nice used table-top weaving loom and hope to use it at some point, maybe do some runners or placemats---took a weaving class my last semester, wish I'd done that sooner, really enjoyed it. Sounds like you have done a lot though. I have done just about everything you have listed there except the interior design, not really my thing, but have made clothes, and cakes, very good at those, and have had people suggest I do it for a living but both are so timeconsuming. I love gouche and acrylics, have never done oils, I am more into abstract though I do love landscapes just never tried them. My plan is once we get all the bills paid, the house, and kids are done college to get back in my jewelry.....this way my DH won't drive me nuts being home all the time too. Maybe I will put him to work wtih some fabrication and assembly!

Not a grandmother but parent myself [2008-11-24]
Well maybe you were a little defensive then and not resentful but reading your post it sounded like the things you do with/for your kids were more like chores instead of things you chose to do. I am not a grandparent but still a parent as both my sons still live at home as they go to college. I see toomany people who just leave their kids to fend for themselves, 2-3 nights every week and every weekend during hockey season and other sports seasons...sorry if I offended you but that's the way you came off.

It's just not right, not right at all. [2008-11-23]
A child that age would not be drinking from a bottle, why is she still nursing? It The mother goes on to say that the child is emotionally attached and it soothes her. I I think the older she gets now, the more damaging it will be when she has to stop, like maybe when she goes off to college??

It's about 25,000 here and it's awful [2008-11-23]
you would think that being in a small town has its benefits but it doesn't. There is no work, people are getting laid off. There is no industry except a couple grocery stores, restaurants, and things like oil changers, Staples, etc. But not the kind of industry that produces anything like computers, TVs, etc. Anyway...the crime rate is skyrocketing. There is no college, so the kids are graduating from HS and hanging out all over the place. The drug problem is getting so bad. They even have special Meth squads, but the problems are not getting solved. Additionally our wonderful town decided to vote against any funding for the police or fire department, so our jails are closing down and the police are being cut in half (think we will have maybe one or two POs for this area). They are letting the criminals out of jail and they are roaming the streets because they canhoodlums (for lack of better word) hanging around the outside. Drug addicts and gangs are now walking up and down the streets in front of our house. Nobody in our neighborhood talks to each other. So we're looking to move where there are more police and people are willing to pay higher taxes to keep the public a little safer.

I knew some ladies from my church when I was in high school [2008-11-23]
that used to meet at the church to quilt. They would auction off the quilts when they were done with them and actually used the money to help in the community with families in need and they used some of it for a scholarship for their high schoolers going off to college. I have seen some sell them at craft fairs and stuff. I never really got into that much of it though I used to help the church ladies once in a while.

About 29,000, I think - sm [2008-11-23]
30 miles north of Albany. Still very active downtown, and I hear our county has the lowest unemployment in the state. Small town feeling, but culture and class - a great combination!

I do very little on the way of beading actually... [2008-11-22]
I do for my own personal uses mostly. I do some drawing, painting, a few crafts. I took a lot of art in high school, but no college level, though I have been considering it. I have this thing I do every year for halloween and I make my decorations myself. People always tell me I should sell my stuff, but I have no idea where to even start. Some of my creations are my babies so I have a hard time parting with them. I was just wondering if anyone had any pointers on how to get over that?

Help is a safety net you have paid for sm [2008-11-21]
Food stamps are a safety net we all pay for, all forms of public assistance are things we have been paying for all along. TAKE the help you need! Do move closer to family if you possibly can. I have been in your shoes myself. I lost my home to foreclosure 4 years ago because of having a near-fatal drug interaction and losing my job of nearly 7 years. I made a couple of moves and finally ended up in a small town out of state from where I had lived for 30 years. I lived with a close friend for about 9 months and had the opportunity to buy a mobile home for $3000. The people I bought it from said I could make payments and I was able to pay it off in 5 months. It needed a lot of work and it has gotten it, most of which I have done myself. This project really helped me to regain parts of myself I had lost. It gave me a reason to get up and get going on my days off. I turned this ugly old thing into a lovely, comfortable home I cherish. I have lost about 50-60 lbs since living here and I have brought the idea of vastly cutting expenses in line with making more money. The end result is that I am very well off financially, better than in my entire life. DO get medication to help you if you can. I didn't have medication to help because I am allergic to every psychotropic in existence. I did this by pulling myself up by the boot straps, but if I could have had help, I would have. There IS a brighter future out there. You CAN have that brighter future because you DESERVE IT. That said, no one expects you to get there alone!!! Don't be embarrassed to ask and receive help. You will be able to help others later. Years ago, when my kids were young, I was a single parent, no support and it was Christmas time. My kids didn't even have adequate clothing or food. A neighbor I hardly knew handed me a Christmas card. Inside was a $100 gift card to K-Mart. She said that many years before that, she had been in my shoes and someone had given her $100 one Christmas, she was now paying this forward to me. The only provision was that I return this favor when I could, and that I bought something for myself too because I deserve nice things for my hard work. It was a turning point for me. I have been more of a giver since. Although I could have paid this back last year, I didn't know anyone who would appropriately benefit. This year, I do and I had to tell her that I was going to do this and why. She cried and felt embarrassed because, she said, she was usually in the position to give and it hurt a little to receive. I reminded her that she was GIVING me the gift of giving with pleasure. Others are going to give to you with pleasure, love, friendship and concern for your well being. TAKE IT. One day you'll post back here about how good things are and I'll want to hear it.

moving out of state [2008-11-21]
Check your divorce laws in your states. Many states will not let you or your (ex) spouse move out of state without permission of the other. Some even have a mileage radius. I think it's to keep both parents close to the kids and not having one parent run far away so the other can't ever see the kids again. My kids were 5 and 1 when I was in the process of getting divorced, and I moved out of state before I realized this. Fortunately my ex realized and understood the need for me and the kids to be close to my family for support, so it was written in the papers that it was okay for me to move out of state and he signed it.

Private counseling [2008-11-21]
Go to a private counselor yourself if he wonANONYMOUS programs attract those who do not get it and go around town blabbing your business, ruining your lives even moreso. Yes, they save lives but they often ruin them with their gossip, even the name gossip hisses, it ruins lives, topples marriages, loses jobs. Be sure before you let these people into your personal, private lives and your homes. Sometimes private, closed-door counseling is the best way to go. Then if you are both comfortable with going public that is your own personal decision. Beware of who you let into your life. If you were going to take a plane ride you would want to know the pilot.

Do any of you have a spouse [2008-11-20]
who can How do you work it out? Are you just stuck always being the bad guy? Unfortunately, the entire United States is having a difficult financial time. It is obviously not just our household. We have cut back everywhere we can, and I mean everywhere. Our families are having difficult problems as well. We also have an ex-spouse and have had unexpected increases in child support, etc. recently along with unexpected additional expenses where this is concerned. Basically, the child needs new glasses, etc. even though the child really doesn It just seems like it is one thing after another and I know it is for everyone, although the circumstances may be slightly different. My problem is that I have been telling my husband for months that this was coming, along with Christmas, birthday, etc. He hasn Although we have cut back on many things, on my initiative, it just has not sunk in for him until now...when everything finalized and we dont To top this off, he can Ibad guy because he is ok with all of it although he admits he has no idea where the money is going to come from. I have been upfront with my family and when people ask me but is it too much to ask that he do the same? I dont But of course he wants to constantly remind me (the cheap skate and tight-a$$) to cut back on groceries, etc. which I cannot possibly do any more than I have already. We have nothing left in savings. We have no Christmas fund. I I donI told you so but I did tell him and he had no concerns until now...when we are seemingly headed towards financial trouble. I have been working OT but his OT has been cut indefinitely from his employer. I I must say he doesn't buy things for himself..its just the piddling away of $20 here and $20 there on top of our already mounting unexpected expenses.

Anyone go through a divorce w/younger kids? sm [2008-11-20]
Iit just isn while I have always felt you don't throw around the word divorce unless you mean it. Well, I mean it now. I gave him an ultimatum - straighten himself out or I leave with the kids. I am not going to go through 5 years of this again. It is affecting the kids, and my son is acting out to the point of saying he wishes he had never been born. I am giving my husband until after Christmas to decide what he is going to do, and if he does not value our marriage more than his alcohol, I am moving out of state. This is not to keep him away from the kids but because my parents (divorced also) are in a different state than I am and I have no family at all here. Has anyone had to make a decision like this? I donno other options. He refuses to go to counseling or to see a doctor about what I am positive is depression. Any tips or suggestions? Sorry to dump on everyone like this, thanks for reading.

Abraham Lincoln's Thanksgiving Proclamation 1863 [2008-11-19]
Abraham Lincoln while that theatre has been greatly contracted by the advancing armies and navies of the Union. Needful diversions of wealth and of strength from the fields of peaceful industry to the national defence, have not arrested the plough, the shuttle, or the ship; the axe had enlarged the borders of our settlements, and the mines, as well of iron and coal as of the precious metals, have yielded even more abundantly than heretofore. Population has steadily increased, notwithstanding the waste that has been made in the camp, the siege and the battle-field; and the country, rejoicing in the consciousness of augmented strength and vigor, is permitted to expect continuance of years, with large increase of freedom.No human counsel hath devised nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things. They are the gracious gifts of the Most High God, who, while dealing with us in anger for our sins, hath nevertheless remembered mercy.It has seemed to me fit and proper that they should be solemnly, reverently and gratefully acknowledged as with one heart and voice by the whole American people. I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquillity and Union.In testimony whereof, I have hereunto set my hand, and caused the seal of the United States to be affixed.Done at the city of Washington, this third day of October, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and sixty-three, and of the independence of the United States the eighty-eighth.By The President: Abraham LincolnWilliam H. Seward, Secretary of State

You know, this is a good idea. I need [2008-11-19]
to finish out my 19-year-old's. She is away at college, so I think that would be a perfect fit for yer. Thanks!!

We only buy for our two sons, and they are older. [2008-11-19]
The youngest (18) wants a decent digital camera, so I think about $250 to $300 range plus some stocking stuffers. Oldest son is easily pleased. HeIndiana Jones style hat, and a book so far. We may round out his gifts with cash, since he's a starving college student. Husband and I do not exchange gifts. My birthday is the day after Christmas, and that is just dinner out for the two of us. Our 24th anniversary is in January, and I already know that I want to get him an iPod. His 50th birthday is in April, and I would love to have a party for him. I'm definitely saving up for that, but it will be a relaxed party. While are Christmas will be fairly simple, looking ahead, I'm trying to budget for some other things.

I would use coupons more if FL doubled them sm [2008-11-18]
As it is, I will use them if it is something I normally buy, but most of the stuff I get is not stuff they have coupons for, or it is for a different brand that I don't like. Florida doesn't charge sales tax on groceries and we don't have state income tax, but we pay higher grocery prices on a lot of things for that reason. And as much as people hate Wal-Mart, that is where I do my shopping because it is affordable and the prices don't change from week to week because of sales ads, which is mostly bumping up prices on stuff so that you really aren't getting that much of a deal anyway.

Last month I spent $321 for 3 of us. [2008-11-18]
It's just DH, 18 year-old son, and I. We live in the Philadelphia area. We generally eat far less meat than most American families, but we aren't vegetarian. My son commutes to a nearby university and works there, as well. He provides his own lunches, and probably only eats breakfast at home half of the time. Now, if you want to factor in what we pay for the meal plan for our son who lives away at college, well then... that's a whole other story! KA-CHING!