just a personal opinion...

In your opinion, is there a benefit to forcing children to [2008-07-03]
My son is at camp for a week. Last night was family night. He cried and begged me to take him home but my husband and his leaders refused and said it would be a big mistake. My husband was an Eagle scout and doesn The places they were sleeping were these three sided buildings with open fronts. They were full of bugs, spiders, bees, etc. They did not have a campfire to scare any critters away. They have see stray cats, racoons, etc. But my son He wasn About half the other boys there in his room (of about 8) cry themselves to sleep every night. They are not homesick like we are told, they are miserable. I don But I don't see it.

I have no personal experience....sm [2008-06-22]
with esophageal cancer, but I just wanted to say how very sorry I am to hear of this.

Just my opinion - see message [2008-06-18]
I think I read some place (like Ann Landers) where it is in really poor taste to have multiple showers for multiple marriages. I tend to agree. If the couple already has everything they need then the point of the shower is to just get even more stuff? I certainly would not bring a gift if they were tactless enough to register for something. The same goes for *money only* bridal and baby showers. Guess that is just my opinion, you asked...

Wondering about your opinion . . . SM [2008-06-16]
I just read a story that one of the Charles Manson followers (female) who was involved in the Sharon Tate murder has brain cancer and is asking to be set free, 37 years later. What do you think? She claims of course that she is a changed person. I say she should finish out her sentence regardless. Just wondering about other's opinions.

I have nothing personal.... [2008-06-14]
against pit bulls in particular. I think all dogs can be dangerous given different circumstances. I don't think it is right to single out a particular breed and just take away an animal from its home without just cause. However, my elderly mother, who suffers from MS, has been plagued by horrible neighbors with many dogs. They do not keep their dogs in their own yard. Not only do they tear out my motherher back yard as their own personal bathroom. Their one dog bit their own daughter and nothing was done. They are always barking at us when we are in my mother I had one come at me and I picked up a shovel that was thankfully near meto protect myself if the dog continued it advance. Their little dog frequently gets under my mother We have called the Humane Society and they will do nothing. I personally think that people should have a right to shoot any dog on their property that shouldn If it weren A 60-some, widowed woman with health problems has no rights to keep destructive, mean dogs off of her property but hey....don Sad when a mut as more rights than my mom. Any irresponsible owner shouldn I will get off of my soap box now. LOL.

My opinion... [2008-06-09]
I disagree with you. The child is deliberately being nasty. His father should correct him and teach him not to talk to other human beings that way. And why did you say she was some weird lady? Of course he is going to be jealous of her,but she is not some weird lady, she is the wife of his daddy and he should be nice to her. To the OP, respond to his taunts very sweetly and redirect him, for example, Oh, you got a slushie, yum! Your daddy makes good slushies doesn I Then give him a smile and walk away. That will help him see that you two are not in a competition.

My opinion . . . sm [2008-06-08]
THIS IS JUST MY OPINION -- NOT A JUDGMENT! I think y'all probably got into this marriage way too fast, especially with a child involved. At this point, if you want to salvage the relationship, DEMAND the 3 of you (and possibly the ex) get into family therapy. Y'all are not going to be able to fix these problems on your own. If DH refuses to consider therapy, you need to consider getting out. I personally don't see things going well if y'all don't get help. His temper scares me too and he has blinders on. I can understand that he loves his kid and doesn't want to put him thru more stress (i am a divorced mother of 2 with a new husband too), but he is bending over backwards so much that his behavior is going to cause lasting problems in that child. Good luck!

Yes, in my opinion, you have every right to be and I wouldn't be doing ANY favors. sm [2008-06-04]
Friends and family just don't morally do things like that to each other.

just a personal opinion... [2008-05-08]
I think this can be a little tricky with kids. Children's imaginations are developing and they are learning so many new things, not to mention they do not always know the meaning of things or understand reasons for the way things may be done. Adults on the other hand, I think their dreams do mean something. I think it is their subconscious talking to them. Things they regress coming to the surface. I know I have had some kooky dreams before and they seem to take place when I am struggling with something. I wouldn't put too much into it with an 8 yr old, I have a child who is 10, sometimes they just have bad dreams at that age. If it is something that happens regularly or your heart tells you your child is struggling with something emotionally, it might be worth looking into therapy.

What is your opinion on these women getting [2008-04-17]
dfs

Everyone has own opinion. My is, it [2008-04-11]
nm

Maybe in your opinion, but maybe not others. [2008-04-11]
You know that button that says report message? What do you think it's for?

sorry but I don't recall asking for personal opinion [2008-03-30]
no offense, but I was just asking those with experience on the subject.

Yes, I did, I am not 53. You asked opinion on age, [2008-03-30]
x

Not my personal situation but I think [2008-03-25]
a lot of the people you hear bragging about their refunds are those on some form of public assistance or single parents who are getting the earned income credit. Although I think you can get an advance on this, most do not. Personally, I like to get around $2000 back for the year. I know I could be saving that on my own, but it If it were in my account, I The small amount of interest I'd make on it for the year wouldn't be worth the stress of having to save it. I haven We lost our house in a fire in October and were underinsured. Now we have to file some sort of tax deduction for that. It

This is a personal subject between him and his wife. [2008-03-18]
First, I hardly think affairs are only a NY thing. Do you know all of NY office holders? If you believe stats, most American adults have had an affair. I don't think that necessarily makes a person not decent, it just means they're human and had a failing. Personally, I'm tired of God complexes in Government. This is a personal subject between him and his wife. I wonder how many of us could live up to the scrutiny heaped upon politicians. I KNOW I couldn't. I've made mistakes too.

My personal observations as a [2008-03-14]
mom: I am in my 40s and grew up back in the old days when discipline for kids in school and at home was okay; however, methods used then are now taboo. It looks like *traditional* discipline (which I feel wasnot necessarily always sensible)has been replaced with an either hands-off approach (dueto fear of lawsuits,retaliation, etc.) or extreme measures,asdescribed in the above post.This brings to mindthe question: How much more effective are we these days with these approaches? I feel for kids these daysas well asfuture generations - looks like they'll have their hands full, if society continues this way.

My opinion [2008-03-11]
I didn I can

Maybe it's the personal preference of the local priest? [2008-03-11]
We used to do it through a screen. Once, when I was in about 6th grade, we went to a different church, and it was awkward. The priest practically yelled at me that I was supposed to say the Act of Contrition. I knew the prayer, but our other priest hadn't expected us to say it. So I guess it's run the way the priest wants to.

need opinion please. sm [2008-02-21]
Has anyone had a problem before with their husband wanting to spend all their time with one of their friends. I mean ALL their time to the extent of getting up in the morning and going there when not working and staying all day. Until bed time. My husband is a truckdriver and he has this friend around here that doesn I mean every time he has a few days that he is in from driving if this friend is at home he goes over there. Well the friend is single and of course my husband never invites me so I basically just don He will take my son with him but not me. It is like the guy place. It is fine for him to go spend time with his friend but let me give an example of how much time he spends. Okay he come in off of his truck yesterday. He came home yesterday afternoon after about 4 pm. Well we had to dip his hunting beagles for fleas and such and feed them and spent some time outside. Well as soon as all that is done he doesn Well I was like you just got in not too long ago. He said well I want to ride to Bouie I said well take us with you. (Me and my son) He acted like he didn Well that was about 6 pm. He didn I can call over there or pass by and he really is there he isn Ok this morning he said he was going rabbit hunting with this friend. They left really early about 5 am. I said how long do you think you will hunt? He says oh no longer than midmorning. Well he didn I said boy did ya He said well we hunted until this afternoon and then he decided to go to his brothers to visit. Came home like I said at 5 pm. He came in and told me all about his hunting trip and sit there then at 6 pm he says I am going back to Bouie I said Oh my gosh you just came home from being with him all day. He said well we are going to go get his 4-wheeler so we can take it hunting when we go in the morning again. I said can He said well I want to ride with him. I got mad and said whatever. I said all you ever want to do is spend your time with Bouie. And he said ok bye and left. That was about 6 and it is 9:30 pm and he isn I don I think I am going to sit him down and tell him that this is starting to be a problem. I mean this is everytime he comes in off the road. Any advice on how to solve this problem? Anyone been in this situation before? Any advice is appreciated.

Your opinion about an incident between me and (sm) [2008-02-20]
We went to the mall I was planning to use my Victoria- on the way there she said, Now we need to talk about what I saw on Oprah and how confidence in yourself affects how you look,it(I am somewhat overweight)Itold her thatI was fine with myself and not to worry about it. Then walking inside the mall she saidI have to get this girl who works in there to help you, she I said I didn't want anyone to help me, I just wanted to look around. So we get inside and she sees her girl and says, go over and ask her to help you. I said, no, I don So she walks over to the lady and says, can you help her? and I said, no, no thank you I just want to shop by myself. But she STILL doesncome over here and ask her. I said, no. She said it AGAIN!! I said, no thanks, nevermind, I will shop later or online. and walked out. My friend tried to call me back in the store!! So I am standing in the hall feeling likea goofballsaying, Susan, come on I don So she comes out in the hall and wants to discuss it, asking me, what did I do? I told her that I was an adult and if I want to ask someone to help me I will, if I do not, I will not, and she shouldn So then she started crying because she made me feel bad. Oh, brother. I will admit that she had a couple of glasses of wine before we left but she does that regularly and seemed like her normal self. I think I was partially self-conscious because of my current weight but then to add insult to injury we had to call attention to it and ask the lady to help me so she could show me where the larger stuff was? It was all mixed in together so she would have had to walk around helping me look at each item. Grrrrr. We are both around 40 years old and she usually doesn she thought I was incompetent. She wouldn So finally I just said it was my own issue with my weight and that she didn't do anything wrong....sheesh. What do you think happened there???

My opinion [2008-02-19]
Who is Barack Obama? Very interesting and something that should be considered in your choice. If you do not ever forward anything else, please forward this to all your contacts...this is very scary to think of what lies ahead of us here in our own United States...better heed this and pray about it and share it. We checked this out on snopes.com. It is factu al. Check for yourself. Who is Barack Obama? Probable U. S. presidential candidate, Barack Hussein Obama was born in Honolulu, Hawaii, to Barack Hussein Obama, Sr., a black MUSLIM from Nyangoma-Kogel, Kenya and Ann Dunham, a white ATHEIST from Wichita, Kansas. Obama's parents met at the University of Hawaii. When Obama was two years old, his parents divorced. Hi s father returned to Kenya. His mother then married Lolo Soetoro, a RADICAL Muslim from Indonesia.? When Obama was 6 years old, the family relocate to Indonesia. Obama attended a MUSLIM school in Jakarta. He also spent two years in a Catholic school. Obama takes great care to conceal the fact that he is a Muslim. He is quick to point out that, He was once a Muslim, but that he also attended Catholic school. Obama's political handlers are attempting to make it appear that that he is not a radical. Obama's introduction to Islam came via his father, and that this influence was temporary at best. In reality, the senior Obama returned to Kenya soon after the divorce, and never again had any direct influence over his son's education. Lolo Soetoro, the second husband of Obama's mother, Ann Dunham, introduced his stepson to Islam. Obama was enrolled in a Wahabi school in Jakarta. Wahabism is the RADICAL teaching that is followed by the Muslim terrorists who are now waging Jihad against the western world . Since it is politically expedient to be a CHRISTIAN when seeking major public office in the United States, Barack Hussein Obama has joined the United Church of Christ in an attempt to downplay his Muslim background. ALSO, keep in mind that when he was sworn into office he DID NOT use the Holy Bible, but instead the Koran. Barack Hussein Obama will NOT recite the Pledge of Allegiance nor will he show any reverence for our flag. While others place their hands over their hearts, Obama turns his back to the flag and slouches. Let us all remain alert concerning Obama's expected presidential candidacy. The Muslims have said they plan on destroying the US from the inside out, what better way to start than at the highest level - through the President of the United States, one of their own!!!!

My opinion is whatever hair style makes you happy...sm [2008-02-18]
is what is appropriate. I am 54 and personally I feel like my hair is easier to style and looks better with my face shape when it is about chin length. Don't worry about what other folks say about hair and age - that's what I think.

If you don't want people to comment on your personal life, then don' t post about it. [2008-02-15]
If all you want is sympathy or someone to agree with your point of view of a personal situation, then you need to phrase your post in such a manner to elicit only that type of response. If you are asking for opinions and advice, you need to take the good with the bad. Remember, honestly is not always pleasant. Also, I have noticed these type of posts seem to be made in the heat of the moment without a great deal of forethought as to content. If you don't want to hear that you have made a negative impression upon someone or don't want negative commentary on your personal life, then you really should not be opening the door to invite it in.

In my opinion, no. They were on their feet for the queen, not the manufactured princess. nm [2008-02-11]
x

A question about emailing. Please read. I need your help! SM [2008-07-02]
The other day my niece sent an emaill accidentally to a friend of mine whom she does not know when I sent something to the regular group of my friends and she ended up sending it him. He answered her, and then they began talking back and forth. The next day she wrote me an email telling me they talked. I wanted to talk to both of them now because I thought this was funny, so before I replied to her I put his name on as a CC. Today he replied to ME on that same email and asked some questions about her. I did not say anything bad, but just told some personal stuff about her that was not bad, just stress she is under. I clicked reply to send that to him. Did that go just to him, since he emailed me today, or did it go to both of them since both names were on the original email? I only clicked REPLY and not REPLY TO ALL. Hope I made sense. I already apologized to my niece in advance, and she is not mad. I just feel terrible about this. I love her dearly and should never have discussed anything personalregarding her life with him. Awaiting your reply! Thanks!

Our dog bit a girl "that was pulling his hurt ear" [2008-07-01]
Well the girl So, you need to contact the police again and find out how you can go about filing a claim. My parentsprovoked the dog. The provoked part didn So, I guess what I am trying to say here is that my parents were your neighbors and they got sued and their insurance premium went up. We I would have to bet though that the foster parents of the bitten dog probably got legal assistance for free too, since they had about 10 foster kids and were getting a fat check each month and obviously not supervising these kids for that girl to have pulled my dog My dog jumped our fence and cut his ear, that girl pulled on the dog I highly doubt that child really need the surgery and probably never even got the surgery, but those foster parents I That may sound harsh and by all means I know that not all foster parents are irresponsible, but in my opinion, my parents got the raw end of the deal. Good luck whatever you decide.

maybe it's you... [2008-07-01]
who is pathetic. This person is simply expressing an opinion and you are being extremely rude. that no respect for another opinion. And I agree with them. what good will money do to alleviate your daughter's fears? Perhaps a more calm and reasoned approach would be more effective instead of aggravating the situation by engaging in battle. By law, hospitals have to report animal bites and the animal has to be impounded for a period of time. If none of this has happened, i find it hard to believe there was any significant injury. Chill out. Help your child and forget the legal battles. Do not be a part of the problems of this sue crazy society.

Identity theft -- never thought it could [2008-06-26]
Yesterday, I got a call from QVC. I had ordered a GPS system for my hubby and QVC called to say they were unable to complete processing of my order because my credit card wouldn QVC said the address I gave them as the billing address did not match the billing address of my credit card. I asked the rep to hold on while I pulled my credit card account up on line. When I did, I saw that my address and phone number had been changed to somewhere in TX (I live in PA). I told QVC I would have to call them back. I immediately called the credit card company. They pulled up my account and said that yes my address had been changed just a few days ago. When I asked how, they couldn They did not know if it was done on-line or by telephone. This, I don If someone called in to change it, shouldn Furthermore, if it was changed on-line, wouldn At any rate, it was changed, and my cc company tried to contact me to verify it by calling the new phone number given. (Makes no sense). Having received no answer, they sent a letter to me, which I have yet to get. One day after changing my address, someone made a $10 on-line purchase with cc account, which went through. Immediately following that, a $4500 on-line purchase was attempted to be put through. This one the cc company did not allow (thank God for small miracles). After having all of this explained to me, I was then transferred to an Identity Theft Specialist, who would help me close this account and reopen another one as well as put into action security alerts for me. For the next 7 years, my credit report will be flagged as a fraud alert, meaning that if anyone tries to open a new account in my name, the lender will have go through extensive verification to confirm it I I also had to file a report with my local police, which I doubt will accomplish anything. Local police are not trained in the same manner as state police, and I don We will see. I did, however, write down the address and the phone number that my account was changed to. My husband called the number last night from his cell phone and no one answered. He left a message stating he was looking for my name and to please return his call to his number. They immediately called back, but when my husband answered, they said nothing. They called back again later that night and did the same thing. Here I told her that apparently I was a victim of identity theft. She said that I said what do you mean and she proceeds to tell me that there have been a lot of account takeovers with this particular company and that it was determined to be an inside job. This left me feeling less than secure about setting up a new account with that company. It also makes me wonder if that My husband says as soon as the new account is set up, we Fortunately, this cc company has 0% identity theft liability, so we will not be responsible for the charges that did go through. However, the bigger concern here is that this person obviously has enough personal information about me to set up new accounts without my knowledge; hence, the reason for the fraud alerts on my credit report. I am so furious, if I ever get my hands on this person, I My husband and I have worked hard all our lives to have good credit and some skuzbucket thinks he can just come along and take it. I don I intend to pursue this fully. If it is an inside job, I will make sure that this credit card company does something about its current employee background checks. So, take a minute today and call your credit companies or go on-line and check to make sure that noone has changed your address and phone number.

here's what I do -- [2008-06-26]
with my credit card company: i utilize their option to be e/mail alerted for any charges over x-amount, which i personally set at about $250. Then i also paid for an identity theft protection service through AMW (America's Most Wanted) which also has several checks/balances in place. You cannot be too careful nowadays. I think the last i heard, identity theft increased 500% over previous few years. Locally in our rural area, someone set up wireless phone service through a major company, but their employee pilfered the personal information and tried to 'steal' the identity. Luckily, they caught her. I understand it often takes about 5 years and thousands of dollars to clear up the mess after a breach.

Just some pros and cons of private college [2008-06-24]
Pros Academic excellence. At the private university learning is the emphasis more than the curriculum itself. The curriculum is rigorous and the course-work is unending, but learning is the central focus at such schools. If you plan on working during school, it is very difficult to balance a full-time schedule at a private university with a work schedule. The time commitment required to succeed in a given class is high, and this will ultimately interfere with your ability to work. Close-knit community. The student community is an integral part of most private colleges. This can be difficult for more independent students who prefer a less hands on approach. The students communicate closely with professors both in and out of class and the students themselves attempt to involve everyone in campus activities. Involvement in the student community is one of the keys to enjoying your college experience at a private college. Involved students. The classroom dynamic is much different at a private university than at a public school. Most students are entirely committed to their academic success. They participate actively in classroom discussions, complete coursework, and are fully engaged in the classroom culture. Top-notch professors. Like the professors at state universities, the instructors at private universities have track records that attest to their personal academic achievements. While most are reputable, professors at private colleges tend to be more loyal to the college they work for and more interested in the achievements of their students. Merit scholarships. The listed tuition is the highest at private colleges; however, what students actually pay for tuition is usually lower. When a student is interested in a private university and the school is interested in the student, both parties begin negotiating tuition by way of grants, merit scholarships, and other financial incentives. Thus, students with a good G.P.A. and knock out test scores should consider applying to any private institutions that they are interested in. Class size. Even at larger private colleges the class size is contained. There are still lecture halls, but typically, fewer teaching assistants and more professors. At small private colleges classes can be as small as 10 or 12 students. Cons Homogeneous population. If you are looking for a more diverse student body that recruits kids from all walks of life, you aren�t likely to find it at a private college. If you are interested in a particular university, check it out first. It�s definitely a good idea to get a feel for what type of students they attract and their current student body is a good indicator. Demanding schedule. The heavy workload makes it difficult to balance extracurricular activities, a job, and a social life at a private college. It�s a good idea to identify your priorities before setting out to attend a school that cost $30 thousand a year. Your parents will appreciate your consideration and you will avoid unnecessary conflicts. Cost of tuition. Tuition is high, even for a good education. If money is no object�go private. If finances are a primary concern, consider all of your alternatives before committing yourself to a decade of debt. Transferring credits. Private universities each have different crediting methods. If the university that you choose doesn�t work for you it may be difficult to transfer and retain all the credits you have earned.

To Valerie...your post below about Pres. Bush [2008-06-21]
Ooookayyy..i won so you can HAVE him - hes all yours (i didn First....If you live in the United States of America, he is also YOUR President. Second....I am proud to call him MY President. Third......You said you didn What is a creatrue? Fourth.....Again, please stop calling OUR President of the United States childish names. Thank you.

Ha! [2008-06-21]
First... I don't claim him. I think he's a tyrant to put it nicely and I think he is a warmonging hillbilly (and that's sad for the hillbillies because they are decent folk he gives a bad name). I told everyone not to vote for him last time... I tried to warn them. I didn't want him and he hasn't done anything to help me our my friends and family in the slightest, except make us look ridiculous on the international stage (which I can say because I live in Europe at the moment and I know how foolish they think us right now). Second, good for you. Maybe you should vote for McCain so that the pain (errr I mean pleasure) never ends. I bet the people that he's been against and not fought for (i.e., Katrina victims, Iowa flood victims, homosexuals, people with diseases that stem cell reasearch could help, innocent people in far off lands that lost family members and friends who were innocent victims) I bet they all share your same sentiments.. right? You can have him.. I bet right about now he's half price on the discount rack anyways! Third... you should be grateful she put creatrue. Its probably how Bush spells and says it, so its a true representation. Fourth... I think the last time I checked it was a free country with free speech and allowed for people to have their own opinions. I have better names to call him than childish ones... but I won't use them since your so easily offended... are you his personal emotional filter? I doubt he cares what the American people call him... he's certainly proven he doesn't care what they think or how they feel... so why should we care about him? Thanks back atcha. I can have whatever opinion I want of the president and I can tell you, I am more the majority than you are.

He may not be the sharpest tool in the shed....... [2008-06-19]
but he is certainly NOT retarded. Thank you for at least putting your thoughts about our President nicely. I can respect your opinion when you put it that way. Peace.

Showers for 2nd marriages [2008-06-18]
My cousin called and asked opinion on wedding showers. Her daughter is marrying for second time and she doesn't know if it is proper to have another shower. She has her own home and has everything she needs. This is the first wedding for future groom. We had same discussion when my son married for second time. His future wife had also been previously married and they both live together and have everything. She went and registered at several places. Her response was she didn't need anything but sure wanted things. Isn't that a bit greedy? Any opionions? Same with second and third baby showers. When I grew up you got one for the first and that was it. If a huge gap between babies maybe a small second one but not one for every baby.

Pit Bulls, please read this! [2008-06-18]
I love dogs, and I don't really have an opinion about pits, because I never owned one. But, please everyone, read what happened in my town a few days ago. This lady was mauled by hers. Its at Greensburgdailynews.com. I was so scared after reading the details of this, and wonder what made him do this unspeakable thing!!

showers [2008-06-18]
I think itplease come to my wedding and buy me a gift that I have picked from Target. I think a baby shower for a 2nd baby is fine if the 1st was a girl and the 2nd is a boy, something like that. I think (and this is just my opinion) that once you already have the clothes for the gender of baby you are having you shouldn't have one, but I have been to lots, some specified as diapers-only baby showers. Close family and friends will probably gift them anyway, but no need for a shower.

Just my opinion - see message [2008-06-18]
I think I read some place (like Ann Landers) where it is in really poor taste to have multiple showers for multiple marriages. I tend to agree. If the couple already has everything they need then the point of the shower is to just get even more stuff? I certainly would not bring a gift if they were tactless enough to register for something. The same goes for *money only* bridal and baby showers. Guess that is just my opinion, you asked...

My heart bleeds for her - yeah right! [2008-06-17]
She should stay in jail and rot! What she did was so horrible and inconceivable (not sure if that's the right word - I mean I can't even imagine what was going through their minds when they were doing that - which is a good thing I guess). I remember when that happened in 1969 (I think that was the year) I was about 9 years old living in Conn. I had nightmares because of what happened to them. Mom & dad tried to keep the stories away from me, but it was everywhere. Every night my mom and dad would show me they were locking the doors and I still woke up crying afraid people were going to break in and kill us. Just because she has brain cancer doesn't change what she did to those poor innocent people. The horror they must have been going through during their final moments of life, especially Sharon Tate being pregnant. Horrible horrible tragedy. I think she has no rights to ask to be set free. If she has brain cancer, when it gets worse who knows what will be going through her mind and what she will do. In my opinion I think she should stay in jail. Hey maybe we should ask Roman Polanski if he thinks she should be let go. Anyway...that is my lowly opinion.

Custody-how much say does an 11-year-old have? PLEASE HELP [2008-06-16]
My 11-year-old son has recently started tearfully asking me to divorce his dad. I have been borderline on it for a while but was trying to keep the family intact- one reason being that I was afraid of how my husband would treat my son and 8-year-old daughter when I was not here. In discussing the possibilities of divorce, I told my son that his father could possiby try to get 50% custody of him. He said tearfully, if that happens, I I have never heard anything like that come out of my child His dad is overbearing and he truly doesn He is very concerned with what everyone else thinks but in truth doesn I guess my son is finally seeing that. I asked him to talk to his dad about how he feels but he is too afraid and said his dad will just say , you got that idea from your mother. I I do want to consider filing for divorce, but if my husband gets partial custody the trauma on my children will be devastating! And he has much more financial means to fight me in court than I have. How much say does an 11-year-old have in court about who they live with? If we went to a family counsellor first would that help at all?

No. I believe she should die in that prison bed. [2008-06-16]
We gave as much tolerance as possible by letting her live, which - in my opinion - would have solved this whole situation years ago. She is free to execute herself if she wishes. I don't care if she is different, saved, rehabilitated. It does not excuse her hideous crime. She is there because she put herself there. JMHO

I have nothing personal.... [2008-06-14]
against pit bulls in particular. I think all dogs can be dangerous given different circumstances. I don't think it is right to single out a particular breed and just take away an animal from its home without just cause. However, my elderly mother, who suffers from MS, has been plagued by horrible neighbors with many dogs. They do not keep their dogs in their own yard. Not only do they tear out my motherher back yard as their own personal bathroom. Their one dog bit their own daughter and nothing was done. They are always barking at us when we are in my mother I had one come at me and I picked up a shovel that was thankfully near meto protect myself if the dog continued it advance. Their little dog frequently gets under my mother We have called the Humane Society and they will do nothing. I personally think that people should have a right to shoot any dog on their property that shouldn If it weren A 60-some, widowed woman with health problems has no rights to keep destructive, mean dogs off of her property but hey....don Sad when a mut as more rights than my mom. Any irresponsible owner shouldn I will get off of my soap box now. LOL.

It is about resposible ownership IMHO...sm [2008-06-13]
A dog will usually show some sign of being aggressive. I don't believe that they would just attack all of a sudden and never show a sign of being unstable. Granted there are some pit bulls who are very dangerous. Now I believe if your friend has a pit she should not let it run loose in the yard. She should have it where it is confined to a fenced in yard with posted signs. I wouldn't feel comfortable going there either if it was just loose. That is not responsible ownership. I don't agree with euthanizing them unless they are dangerous. But I do agree with restrictions on ownership. I don't believe you should be allowed to own a pit and not have a fenced in area for it. They think when a stranger approaches they have to protect their property and protect their owner. You can't just let them have free reign of the place and roam all over the property to possibly bite someone who visited. If they aren't loose to bite someone then they can't bite them. Just my opinion.

If you would like to further educate yourself on this issue [2008-06-12]
INTERESTING ARTICLE I realize this is very long, but as an expert in this field, I want to re-post information I sent, in September, to another blogger concerned about the Best Friends summit. I want to emphasize that the following information is based on years of dedicated research, and decades of dog training experience. I do not simply pass along information I've heard or read somewhere...which is sadly what most people, on all sides of dog-related issues, do. I recognize that some of your readers may find parts of it quite controversial. That's okay. Facts are facts, even if they conflict with some other [expert's] unresearched opinions. As such, I've opted to leave those sections in, because they're vital in refuting unfounded notions about dogs, canine genetics, and dog behaviour, which lead to myths about canine aggression. Any individual point of controversy should not take away from the overall message of fact and reason that does not support the view that any entire dog breed could be considered dangerous. Only once people stop repeating inaccurate information (no matter how good it may sound), will we ever hope to get to the heart of this issue, and start reducing the number of unprovoked dog bites. The following was written off the top of my head, in response to concerns about the Best Friends' agenda. It is not a composed article meant for publication. Please also keep in mind, it has a decidedly Canadian perspective, although there is ample U.S. data referenced. This is what I wrote (with a few minor clarifications): Dear (blogger), As you know, I am an expert in Canadian dog bite statistics. After years of research, there are a number of interesting facts I right here, in one place. The situation with unprovoked dog bites is not what nearly everyone believes it to be. If I had one pet peeve, it is that most people merely repeat things they�ve heard or read. They don�t really know if what they�re saying is true or not. They merely �believe� those things to be true, and that�s enough for them, I guess. You know what I say, �No matter how often or loudly a myth is repeated, it is still just a myth.� Some people simply like agreeing with others. Some like to pretend they�re especially knowledgeable or have unique insight. Whatever the source for so many of these myths, years of research has proven the majority of beliefs I encounter about dogs are simply untrue. Whenever discussing the issue of dangerous dogs, it's always important to remember a few key points about the dog bite statistics (especially as they pertain to Canada): 1. The most dangerous breeds in Canada are, in order: German Shepherd, Cocker Spaniel, Rottweiler, and Golden Retriever. Why do I say this? Well, this is not dog bite data, but rather dog attack data based on the reporting information from the Canadian Hospital Injury Reporting and Prevention Program (CHIRPP). The CHIRPP members (hospitals, and reporting physicians and nurses) have no reason to lie about the information they receive, surrounding the breed of dog that has attacked. Why do I say the most dangerous? Well, because the CHIRPP data only applies to the most severe dog attacks (i.e. those injuries serious enough to require treatment in hospital). These are not little nips that can be treated with ice or even a band aid. These are severe dog bite injuries that need to be treated in hospital. The dogs that cause the most serious injuries in Canada belong to the above-mentioned breeds, more than any others. Unlike municipal dog bite data (where any bite, no matter how inconsequential, or even against other animals, is counted), the CHIRPP data only relates to the most serious dog attacks against human victims. 2. 'Pit bulls' are rarely in the #1 spot in dog bite statistics. Any measures to restrict or ban the #2, #5, or #37 'breed' of dog in the dog bite statistics, but not #1, is pure hypocrisy. As faulty as the logic may be, if you're going to ban or restrict a type of dog in an attempt to reduce the number of dog bites, then it must be the ones who bite the most and/or cause the most serious injuries. Either way, that 'breed' is not 'pit bulls'. 3. There hasn't been one confirmed death of a child attributed to an unprovoked attack by a 'pit bull' in Canadian history. (There has been one unconfirmed death.) 4. The very first human fatality attributed to an unprovoked attack by a 'pit bull' in Canadian history occurred in May of 2006. Until then, every insinuation or claim about Canadians being in danger of being killed in unprovoked attacks by 'pit bulls' was totally unfounded. (In the Ontario case in May, the dog was actually only part 'pit bull'. It was a Labrador Retriever/'pit bull' cross, and the dog's owner was the victim.) (It should be noted that there have been at least two human fatalities in Canada attributed to unprovoked attacks by Labrador Retriever crosses, yet this was the first for a 'pit bull' cross.) 5. Municipal dog bite statistics often combine reported dog bite data against both humans and other animals. While I don�t have any problems with doing so, those citing combined statistics must be aware that the majority of the dog bite reports aren�t against people. To imply otherwise is, at best, misleading and, at worst, dishonest. For example: Toronto has arguably the largest municipal �pit bull� population in Canada. In 2004, 12 of the city�s estimated 30,000+ �pit bulls� had been reported for biting. (That�s about 0.04% of the population, by the way; leaving 99.96% of Toronto�s �pit bulls� completely innocent of such allegations.) However, the majority of those reported bites were against other animals. Only 2 of the 12 could even begin to be called �attacks� against humans. So, when 2 out of at least 30,000 dogs of a loosely-defined type are involved in attacks in an entire year, is that really justification for not just trying to ban or restrict them, but for making sweeping generalizations about all the rest? 6. No matter what dog �breed� tops the dog bite statistics, the vast majority of bites are still attributed to other breeds. To better help people understand the absurdity of a breed-based approach to dog bite prevention, let�s imagine that �pit bulls� are responsible for a virtually unheard of 10% of bites in some Canadian city. That still leaves 90% of biting dogs unaffected by any breed-based approach. This is the primary reason why breed bans have been such a colossal failure wherever they�ve been tried. The majority of biting and attacking dogs are not affected, so their owners are free to continue to behave negligently. 7. All dogs can bite. There is no such thing as a breed of dog that has never bitten, never attacked, never maimed, or never killed (a person or other animal). 8. It is the size of the victim, not the dog, which best predicts severity of injury in an attack. While even the very smallest dog breeds have killed humans, the very largest dog breeds are rarely involved in attacks. 9. Adults are rarely seriously injured by dogs of any size, while children are the most common dog bite victims. Their attackers range from the very smallest to the very largest dog breeds. 10. The dogs actually involved in attacks are not genetically related in any meaningful way. This goes right to the heart of common, yet completely unscientific, baseless claims about allegedly inheriting aggressive behaivours or being bred for aggression. In short, the dogs involved in attacks are not closely genetically related to one another. This tends to refute the idea that the attack was due to some aberrant inherited gene. Think about it. What could the Dalmatian that bit off a boy�s nose 10 years ago and the Golden Retriever that left 76 stitches in a girl�s face, just a few years ago, possibly have in common, from a genetic standpoint? Is anyone really trying to suggest they�re genetically related, and both inherited some sort of as-yet-undiscovered �attack gene�? Even the Rottweiler that killed a child in New Brunswick and the Rottweiler that killed a child in Ontario don�t share any common ancestors in their pedigrees; making the whole notion of a shared genetic cause for attacks completely ludicrous. Put simply, the individual dogs involved in unique attack incidents are not genetically related in any way other than that which makes them dogs. 11. Psychology defines aggression as learned behaviour. I�ve been researching dog biting incidents since 1999. I have yet to find a dog involved in an attack that didn�t have a known history of aggressive behaviour. Aggression has to be learned and practiced before it is perfected. I have yet to come across a case of a dog that attacked unprovoked, without ever having barked menacingly, growled, lunged, snapped, or what have you. This completely refutes the (quite silly) urban myth that �some dogs just turn�, or that dogs can be THIS unpredictable. (i.e. friendly family pet with no history of ever having behaved aggressively one minute; then savage, unprovoked attacker the next) As an experienced dog trainer (one who has spent many of those years SUCCESSFULLY re-training aggressive dogs), I can attest that dogs are not all that unpredictable. Sure, they might do something out of the ordinary, every now and then. However, for a dog to suddenly behave aggressively in a way that is truly threatening or injurious, it must have practiced those behaviours in the past. This is the nature of all learned behaviours. Only practice makes perfect. (I can elaborate more on that, if you wish.) It�s as though people can�t imagine any other form of aggressive behaviour, other than biting. To help them along, I must point out that aggressive behaviours follow a fairly predictable scale of escalation. It may begin with staring or raised hackles (all merely indicating discomfort with a situation). That can lead to raised lips, growling, stiffened body posture, menacing barking, lunging, and attempted bites. Long before an unwarranted bite ever occurs, there are a litany of warning signs that the dog will eventually bite. Even the most die-hard dog fighting breeders admit they have to start their puppies very young (often at six weeks), to turn them into superior fighters. When asked why they have to spend so much effort training their (allegedly bred-to-fight) dogs, none can provide a scientifically or practically sensible response. Most use made-up terminologies to emphasize what they believe are inherited traits, while playing down the daily training they force on the dogs. Yet it is clear that, without this ongoing encouragement, the dogs don�t become proficient fighters. I�ve researched so many cases where the owner has allegedly claimed the attack was the first time the dog behaved aggressively, I now pay little heed to such statements. The neighbours almost always tell a very different story. To use a more famous case as an example, little Courtney Trempe was killed by a dog the owner claimed had never behaved aggressively before. The owner went on to say he �couldn�t have known� the dog would attack, because it had never tried to bite a person. Well, it turns out the dog had not just attacked previously, but had actually killed two neighbourhood dogs in the past. That is an aggressive dog, by anyone�s standards. But it does bring me to my next point� 12. Aggression is aggression is aggression. The idea that aggression can be species-specific is not based in any kind of scientific, statistical, or practical data. It seems to be little more than wishful thinking. Those perpetuating this notion tend not to have even attempted to validate this theory in any way. There is a very disturbing myth being promulgated by a number of groups that should know better than to perpetuate unfounded myths. The idea that aggression towards other dogs is markedly different than aggression towards humans is scientifically and statistically baseless. (But I realize a lot of people learned this myth, and repeat it as though it is true.) I have to point out that the real-world data, in no uncertain terms, clearly refutes such theories. Of the dogs involved in their first aggression incident towards a human, the vast majority had behaved aggressively towards other animals (usually other dogs) in the past. Of the dogs involved in their first bites against humans, where the dog had no history of aggression towards humans, the majority had behaved aggressively towards other animals (usually other dogs) in the past. Of the dogs whose first bite against a person resulted in that individual�s death, and where the dog had no history of aggressive behaviour towards humans, every one of the cases I�ve investigated involved dogs that had behaved aggressively towards other dogs in the past. (see the Trempe case example, above) So, while some aggressive dogs may, for now, limit their aggressive behaviour to other animals, it in no way guarantees it will remain that way forever. Most, if not all, the first-time human biters had only behaved aggressively towards other animals, in the past. Their owners, having believed the myth that aggression is species-specific in dogs, are always surprised when their dog-aggressive dogs bite someone. Again, dog-aggression could remain contained, for a number of social and environmental reasons. Statistically, these dogs are equally as likely to bite a human, one day. Dogs with histories of aggressive behaviour (towards either humans or other animals) are almost exclusively involved in unprovoked biting incidents. 13. Nearly all unprovoked dog bites would not be prevented by dog control laws. Since dog control laws typically only apply to the conduct of owners (and their dogs) when they�re on public property, it completely negates their ability to affect the circumstances that lead to the vast majority of unprovoked dog bites. When it comes to total dog bite numbers, almost all take place on the owner�s property. When it comes to reported dog bite numbers, the overwhelming majority take place on, or directly adjacent to, the owner�s property. Supervised dogs in a public place account for less than 1% of all bites. This makes public restraint laws especially ineptly-aimed and ineffective in reducing dog bites. Most unprovoked biting incidents involve (typically an unsupervised) dog known to the victim. Whether or not the victim knows the dog, the bite usually takes place on the owner�s property (where the dog is either loose or tethered), or directly adjacent to the owner�s property (where the dog was either allowed to venture off the owner�s property, or �escaped�). Very few unprovoked biting incidents involve a supervised dog. Simple supervision appears to be very effective in preventing dog bites. When bites take place far from the owner�s property, the dogs involved were most likely loose, roaming, unsupervised dogs. Simply put, public restraint laws don�t target the situations that actually lead to unprovoked dog bites. 14. Cities that address the real causes of unprovoked dog bites (i.e. lack of supervision & lack of socialization and training) are hugely successful in reducing the number of dog bites. Calgary is the best example we have in Canada. They reduced dog bites by 70%, even during a period where the population doubled. Calgary�s approach was to first enforce existing laws. They strictly enforce licensing, and boast a licensing rate of 90% (compared to most cites� 10-20%). In this way, they have a better handle on the dog population in their community, which helps in making decisions and drawing conclusions. They also have a zero tolerance policy for acts of aggression. (Something I�m personally totally in favour of. Dogs are not weapons, and anyone who unethically uses a dog for that purpose shouldn�t be allowed to own one.) Any report of aggressive behaviour of any kind results in a visit from animal control and a warning. City officials are clear, in that they agree one of the biggest aspects of their success was the creation of ample off-leash areas for dogs to be exercised, socialized, and trained off-leash. With reportedly the largest number of off-leash parks in Canada, it�s no coincidence that Calgary also has the lowest dog bite rate of any major city in Canada. Several years ago, I made this prediction, �When the studies are done, we�ll find the cities with the best access to off-leash parks are also the cities with the lowest percentage of dog bites.� Calgary certainly suggests my prediction was correct. Finally, Calgary increased the penalties for some transgressions. Combined with increased enforcement, the large percentage of licensed dogs, along with the higher fines, has led to Calgary�s animal control department becoming financially self-sufficient. It�s win, win, win, in Calgary, all because they addressed the real causes for unwarranted aggression in dogs. 15. Breed-specific approaches to dog bite prevention have failed. There isn�t one region that can claim a reduction in the number, or severity, of dog bites as a direct result of banning a breed of dog. In Winnipeg, officials promoting the city�s long-time ban on �pit bulls� often misleads the public by stating ��pit bull� attacks� have been eliminated. Well of course they�ve been eliminated. �Pit bulls� are banned in Winnipeg. You don�t have to be rocket scientist to figure that out. There are also no wooly mammoth attacks or saber toothed tiger attacks, either. When Winnipeg banned �pit bulls�, German Shepherds, and their crosses, were far and away the most common biters in that city. After �pit bulls� were banned, there was an average of close to 50 more bites per year, for the following decade. In addition to the rise in overall dog bites, the number of bites by German Shepherds and crosses, Labrador Retrievers and crosses, Terriers crosses, and Rottweilers and crosses, skyrocketed. Kitchener is another example. The city of Kitchener banned �pit bulls� in 1997, without ever having done an analysis on the city�s dog bite data. Only after �pit bulls� were banned was it discovered they were #8 in the 1996 dog bite statistics, �right behind #7 Poodles,� as it is commonly said. In what could only be a deliberate attempt to mislead the public, officials immediately halted the collection of dog bite data by breed. Even so, while we don�t know which breeds have been doing the biting, we can still determine if the �pit bull� ban has been effective in reducing dog bites in Kitchener. Every animal bite is required, by law, to be reported to the Medical Officer of Health. With a sleuthing, it was discovered that dog bites haven�t been reduced at all, since �pit bulls� were banned in 1997. They�ve remained pretty constant. According to a BBC report, hospitalizations due to dog bites rose 25% after �pit bulls� were banned in England. Officials from most of the cities that have repealed breed-specific laws have used terms like �ineffective� and �unenforceable�. 16. All dog breeds are genetically identical. Even DNA can�t distinguish between a Chihuahua, a �pit bull�, a Great Dane, and a wolf. (Yes, while there are occasional claims of in-roads, in this area, using markers, all dogs are still considered genetically identical.) Those rare individuals with the personal expertise necessary to accurately attempt to determine a dog�s breed based on appearance alone typically are not employed in the various occupations charged with enforcing most breed-specific legislation. This leaves the subjective determination of a dog�s breed to the very inexpert animal control and shelter workers. In some cases, police officers must decide the dog�s breed, yet not one police officer is trained to (accurately) differentiate between dog breeds. The same can be said of veterinarians. A veterinary license infers expertise in diagnosing and treating illness, for the most part. Neither practicing veterinarians nor veterinary students are required to prove any expertise in breed identification in order to obtain a license. Any expertise an individual veterinarian may possess, in terms of breed identification, or even dog training and behaviour, was most likely acquired outside the requirements of licensing. Because the people enforcing breed-specific laws are not dog breed identification experts, the likelihood of misidentification is unconscionably great. (In Ontario, several dogs have already been misidentified, under breed-specific ordinances.) 17. The public is not in danger of unprovoked dog bites. For instance, every recent dog-related fatality in Canada has involved dogs and victims residing within the same home. The same could be said for the majority of bites and attacks, as well. This is very important information, in terms of quelling the public�s hysteria. �The public� is rarely involved in unprovoked biting incidents. Most bite victims knew the dog and were voluntarily interacting with it at the time of the bite. Most bite victims are bitten by their own dogs. If you don�t own a dog, your risk of being bitten is very low. If you also don�t interact with dogs, or live next door to a dog that is routinely left unsupervised, or one that is known to behave aggressively, then your risk of being bitten is virtually nil. Even when we don�t account for contributing factors (such as proximity) you are still more than 100 times more likely to be hit by lightning than killed by a dog. (In Canada, the likelihood of being killed by a dog you don�t know or live with is virtually zero.) 18. �Pit bulls� are, if anything, less likely to bite. In the U.S., �pit bulls� are estimated to make up 9% of the dog population, yet they typically only make up 2-4% of dog bites, nationwide. In case your readers don�t understand what that means, it would be expected, purely on population alone, that 9% of dog bites would be attributed to �pit bulls�. Since less than half (even a third) of bites are reportedly caused by �pit bulls�, this suggests they�re much less likely to bite than should be expected. 19. �Pit bulls� are less likely to kill than people. In the U.S., even extremely conservative estimates suggest that only 0.00002% of the �pit bull� population has killed. This is much lower than the human population (men, in particular). Whatever someone�s views about �pit bulls� might be, it can�t change the fact that at least 99.99998% have never, and will never, kill anyone. 20. 99.9% of all dogs, from all breeds, will never be involved in an attack. Huge generalizations about dog breeds is not only unscientific, it�s not even practically accurate. I like to put it this way, �If any �breed� were genetically programmed to attack, certainly more than 0.1% of them would.� 21. The media. While I don�t want to get into a protracted discussion about the lack of honesty in media reports of dog bites, I will summarize by saying that reviewing media reports of dog biting incidents is not �research� because the media is extremely biased in regards to which stories it chooses to cover. The media reports dog biting incidents involving �pit bulls� to the near-exclusion of all others. In addition, they use other tactics to exaggerate the details, such as salacious language, or references to other dog biting incidents involving �pit bulls�. There are countless incidents of media bias. In Ontario, a �pit bull� killed another dog, and it was front-page news, that reappeared in the media for weeks. The owner was swiftly taken to jail. Around the same time, two Labs killed another dog, and attacked a �pit bull� without any real media interest. The owner of the Labs was not charged with any serious offence. There are other blatant incidents, as well. One weekend, two off-leash dogs (one of them being a �pit bull�) got into a squabble, and every major media agency reported the incident. That same weekend, a child was mauled by the family�s Golden Retriever, and not one media outlet covered the story. A child was mauled so savagely by his grandfather�s Labrador Retriever, he required treatment at two Ontario hospitals. Only one media outlet covered this story in just one broadcast. Again, relying on the media for the facts of dog biting cases is not advised. Naturally, I could go on. But there you have a pretty good primer (off the top of my head), regarding the facts about the who, what, where, when, how, and why dogs bite unprovoked. Because I kept encountering the same story, over and over and over again, in my research of dog biting incidents, I was led to create a dog bite prevention strategy that deals with the factors common to nearly all the cases I�d investigated. I made it simple, and easy to remember. And I made sure not to include anything that would require an individual to develop some kind of expertise. People who don�t own dogs or aren�t experienced dog trainers still have a right to protect themselves from unprovoked dog bites. The following is what I call, the �3 Simple Steps to Dog Bite Prevention�: 1. Avoid unsupervised dogs. 2. Never leave children unsupervised with dogs. 3. Ensure our own dogs are properly trained and adequately supervised at all times. By following these �3 Simple Steps�, we could virtually eliminate unprovoked dog bites in Canada. It is not just important, but vital, to know what ACTUALLY causes dogs to bite unprovoked, if we ever hope to reduce those numbers. Obtusely theorizing about possible causes or solutions is not helpful and, as in the case of breed-specific legislation, is often harmful to both humans and dogs. If you would like more information, please don�t hesitate to contact me. Sincerely, Marjorie Darby Founder,

Not true [2008-06-12]
I have a pointer mix that is pure muscle. When he gets his mind set to something, its pretty hard to stop him, which is why we train him constantly each and every day. If you are the pack leader, the animal will almost always listen to you, even in the heat of the moment. I have worked with trainers personally and seen dogs rehabilitated once they have an outlet for their frustration and have a packleader in place. Its against animal nature to go against the pack leader. Lots of dog breeds are muscular and strong. Any dog can bite someone... don The reason most people even draw on them as a killer breed is because of the media and because that is the way they are portrayed, but in the end (through my own personal experience and education) its the owners that are responsible for the dog. Good training and a knowledge of dog language/behavior/signs and signals is very very important. Its pretty easy to just put the dog down though and take no responsibility as the owner. Its really easy to say... ohh, its the breed and lets ban it instead of doing to work to make sure that dogs or other animals can live as balanced members of a pack. That's how people are though... whatever is easiest.

I am speaking with very little knowledge here.. [2008-06-11]
I have only met one (1) pit bull in my life. It was very pleasant, wanted to be petted, and never hostile. What I did notice is how muscular it was and I remember thinking that I wouldn All dog breedsare capable of being aggressive(especially if there is a dominance issue), but some breeds are more muscular and less *intidimated* by humans than other breeds. It seems to me (dog experts, please correct me) it would be easier to pull a Yorkie or a Cocker Spaniel off an attacked person than a pit bull. I don However, my humble opinion does not make up for the fact that you could face the loss of a loved family pet. I hope it works out for you.

steps [2008-06-10]
I agree with you and feel very deeply for this poor child. This woman is hateful, immature, and a dozen other adjectives that I could add, but they just would not change her bad, bad, bad, bad behavior and attitude. Wonder if her husband knows she is trash-talking him online --- would love to here his opinion of this situation --- since she has unilaterally decided to air her dirty laundry in a public format. Who is spitful and immature????

steps [2008-06-10]
I don't need pills or booze, but I am not surprised that you do. Child abuse is not okay. I have contacted a moderator to request that they track down this nut job and report her to the authorities in whatever state she lives in. She sounds unbalanced and dangerous, and in my opinion this poor child needs to be protected. They also need to make the child's father aware of the venom this woman is directing at his child. It sounds to me like this child is simply responding to her bratty behavior and she is the one who needs to be reigned in. Unlike you, I do not believe that child abuse is acceptable --- most people do not take pills or alcohol to forget that fact, obviously it helps you, though.

For anon... [2008-06-09]
Just for the record, I wasn't calling you names. You don't like my opinion, that's fine. I've read your previous posts though, and I don't think some of these other posters have. I was NOT calling you a weird lady, I was stating that to a 6-year-old boy you are some weird lady who is taking his daddy. You and the father were not together long enough for that child to feel any connection to you prior to the marriage, and you have shown nothing but hatred and jealousy toward the child on your weekly posts here. I would (and this is just a guess) imagine you're not all that bonding and loving with the child, so yes...he's not going to think well of you. And I still stand by my belief that a 6-year-old saying I got a slushie and you didn't isn't spiteful or in any way a malacious act. It's a 6-year-old being a 6-year-old.

My opinion . . . sm [2008-06-08]
THIS IS JUST MY OPINION -- NOT A JUDGMENT! I think y'all probably got into this marriage way too fast, especially with a child involved. At this point, if you want to salvage the relationship, DEMAND the 3 of you (and possibly the ex) get into family therapy. Y'all are not going to be able to fix these problems on your own. If DH refuses to consider therapy, you need to consider getting out. I personally don't see things going well if y'all don't get help. His temper scares me too and he has blinders on. I can understand that he loves his kid and doesn't want to put him thru more stress (i am a divorced mother of 2 with a new husband too), but he is bending over backwards so much that his behavior is going to cause lasting problems in that child. Good luck!