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Electronics addiction

Posted By: Not alone on 2007-10-19
In Reply to: Oh, so ladies not the only ones who do this - Caught!

It is real, and my DH has a bad case.

I've been married 20 years. For the first 10 years, with each purchase I always thought he finally had everything and he'd stop trading up. No - it never ends. He does take some things back (and yet always forgets to safe-keep the receipt). He tries to tell me my cheap OTC makeup and $20-clothes are the same thing, but electronics are so expensive and unnecessary to me that it does get annoying that he has such an expensive hobby. It's as if THAT's the reason I'm working - to support his addiction. Sigh.
It's never the end.


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So is it sex addiction, or porn addiction? (sm)
Seems like there is a difference. How would one become a therapist for the stars with sex addiction? LOL.
Addiction
Ex sister-in-law was addicted to cocaine, and she did incredibly stupid/dangerous things all the time. I am not surprised LL did not get a driver, judgment is totally impaired when you are addicted to coke. That is why she is my EX-sister-in-law
HBO series on addiction sm
HBO had an excellent series on addiction.It may be available on the Net someplace. They have what is called the *go* factor in the brain, etc. which stimulates the need for alcohol or drugs. I have attended many different lectures on this and it is very confusing. All I know is that it happens in the very best of families, drugs, alcohol, any feel good addiction can happen to anyone. I have a hard time dealing with it myself since some of my nearest and dearest have problems. All one can do is take good care of themselves and lead by example. This time of year seems to bring it all out - I used to dread Christmas and the loose lips that sink ships, one too many drinkers can ruin a holiday! It's funny in the movies but not in real life, it is a disaster. No one needs to apologize, glad the subject came up, it's a good *remember when* for me. I stopped buying booze several years ago and it is surprising how my guest list has shortened, thank goodness! I feel my life has improved for the better since alcohol is not on my holiday menu. You have to start someplace, why now with your own home sweet home? No more booze served here. A lot of us have walked that walk, it's a tough one.
computer addiction
see below.
cig smoking is EXACTLY like heroin addiction.....

filters cut off for more strength....to answer your question.


I wish someone had stopped me - folks gave permission at a young age....because they were smokers.....I have never quit except in pregnancy....but I quit buying over 3-1/2 months ago, still smoke but ask others for one....and I cut back smoking by 75 percent and THAT's something because I no longer even cough the way I used to, my house smells GREAT (smoking outside only).....and I sound better (because I really am better - health-wise).


It is MOST definitely a drug addiction, as bad as any of them, as addicting as any of them........so the post was right on about *hearing it is as strong as a heroin addiction* - I tell kids today, that's exactly what it is...........................because it is.


My only suggestion is to show her pictures (found online even, just Google the subject/topic/question) of what lungs look like in smokers versus nonsmokre, and then find some head and neck surgical oncology site and start showing her pictures there (I worked in a surgical oncology HEAD AND NECK dept for a few years and what I saw was definitely sickening and yet, I too, still smoke *slaps self*)


My children (due to the fact I used above tactics) - NEVER smoked (thank goodness!!!!).


Best of luck to her and you!!! 



to irritated/porn addiction?

Wow, you sure are trusting after seeing such a big change in behavior.  I hope you don't get what I got:  the greatest guy I could've wanted (good, prominent family, $, respect, the works).   I won't fill in all the frills I got, but they were plenty, and I thought I was set. for life.  And yes, he did love me dearly.


The thing I came to learn was that he had a porn addiction.  It's something I've never experienced, and really hadn't typed about, either.  I'm no fool, and had been with plenty of men before him, as we got married later than most, but this was a first for me.  In the end it ruined our marriage.   My point is that when you see strange things happen, don't poo-poo it.  Only you know if something is amiss, and I believe you do.  I hope I'm wrong, and I certainly hope you don't have to face what I did.  It sickens me to think about the details of all that chapter, but now that we're no longer "one," I know that I can't fix him, and as long as he doesn't acknowledge his problem, he won't, either.  Ironically, even now I'd be as supportive as possible if he were to shed the demons that are eroding him to his core, but he'll be the first to tell the world that there's nothing wrong with him.


Just something to think about.  I hope you don't end up the way I did.  I'm just glad I don't have all that anxiety anymore, and we're actually friends (or something like that).


Good luck.


Yes - he checked himself in rehab for sex addiction
nm
I was simply stating what my sweet addiction is and what
my not sweet addiction is.
My husband is an alcoholic currently in rehab for his addiction.

Our marriage has suffered terribly because of his addiction.  Actually, I should say my love for him has suffered terribly because of his alcoholism.  He is totally dependent on me and I have come to feel more like his mother than his wife.  I make the money, pay the bills, take care of our children, basically run the house.  He's either always looking for a job or working as a self-employed used engine and transmission salesman/mechanic barely making any money at all.


Recently, I told him I didn't love him anymore and that I was tired of taking care of him.  So he entered rehab as a way to win me back and prove his love for me.  He calls me at least 20 times a day from rehab.  If I don't answer, he will call repeatedly every two minutes or so until someone answers or he has to go back to group or class or whatever. 


He will get out of rehab at the end of this month and fully expects to come back home and provie that he is changing.  My problem is this, I don't want him to come home.  I have enjoyed the peace I've had with him gone (save for the constant phone calls).  However, I fear that if I am honest with him and tell him over the phone that I don't want him back, this will affect his sobriety and basically he will see no reason to finish rehab and remain sober.  He tells me repeatedly that he is doing this for me.  I've told him he should be doing it for himself or at the very least, his kids and he will just agree with me and change the subject.


He's not a bad person.  He just has his problems and I'm tired of feeling like I have this anchor around my neck all of the time.  While he's been gone I've enjoyed spending time with my kids.  I've gotten together with my girlfriends for dinner and movies and just had girls' night out.  I've spent time visiting my mom and sister and helping my niece plan her upcoming wedding.  Without my husband around, I've just feel free to have fun and do stuff for me.


How can I tell him that I want a divorce without feeling responsible for affecting his rehabilitation?  How would you handle it?


I agree-cigs worse addiction than pot, like heroin!
.
Ancestry.Com Needs a Surgeon General's Addiction Warning Box
Is to get one of those Ancestry charts online where you put in each person in a family tree. You can then click on 2 people's names and see exactly how they're related to each other.