I have been with hubby 23 years....
Posted By: 2teens on 2006-11-15
In Reply to: Does your husband or significant other do this? Just now, at 7:30, my husband came home from sm - not amused
and you have got to love them for trying, not that their timing is the best. Mine I would have just looked at him, laughed and said "find something better to do at the moment" and then tackle him later. I think they just like a little extra attention. LOL
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My hubby quit 3 years ago.
He is sooooo glad. At his dad's funeral recently he had a pack of tissues in his pocket. His brother in law thought it was a pack of cigs for a second. That was one light momement on a tough day.
Margaret's list idea is great; I've used that for other things.
Replacement activities are good too ... having a new thing you do, like a walk at lunch, or drinking chamomile tea or something new and different to help mark the change in your life.
And it will be like you gave yourself a raise! You could start keeping track of how much you are saving and use it for vacations or clothes or whatever treat you'd most like.
(That would be plants for me).
:oD
Yes! Met my hubby that way. Very successful for us. 10 years now. We were one of the "first"
wasn't very popular back then and so initially our friends and family were shocked and against it. We knew in our hearts that it was true love...still is after 10 years.
I did, however, a few months after we finally met in person, find photos and letters from other girls he had tried to "meet." I was crushed. I should have figured I wasn't the only one, but I wanted to believe that anyway. He did tell me I was the best looking and overall the best one out of all he had met, so that made me feel great....
He's an amazing man. I'm so lucky.
I'm 20 months older than my hubby, married 23 years so far! -nm
x
My husband is 7.5 years younger. Been together almost 20 happy years...nm
nm
My feelings; people shacking up together for years and years
and then all of a sudden deciding to get married don't need a thing, obviously. A shower should not even be given. I lived with my now husband a while (nowadays who doesn't!) before we married and I also had been married before years ago but he was not....so of course HIS mom wanted a shower. I told her absolutely not unless it was just the immediate family, his mom, sisters, etc, more like a celebration/get together. And so that's what we did. Showers are tacky, period. Unless it's a couple of young kids getting married straight out of the house and that doesn't happen much anymore.
Been with a man 13 years older, now with a man 4 years younger.
Younger is better, at least in my case ;)
Sorry, meant 75 cents. Still, that was years and years ago.
xx
I studied to be a scopist years and years ago
Back in the early 1990s I took a course called Note reader Scopist. They read court reporter notes (those long skinny papers that looks like a cash receipt) and types them into documents. I had found the course through something called At Home Professions but just didn't finish it because it was too expensive for me. But I am familiar with them and even found my book from the first course I took. Looking back I think it would have been a blast if I had kept up with it.
It is definitely legitimate. A lot has changed since the early 90s, so I'm not too familiar with the industry now. I do remember what was really weird was it didn't take a lot for me to learn it. For instance I could look at a line of court notes and see something that looked like: NV p srn - and I seemed to know exactly what it said. Just weird. My DH used to say that I understood it because I was an alien and my ship crashed in Roswell. HA HA HA Anyway...that's what I know about it. But if you Google note reader scopist or at home professions i'm sure you could probably find a lot of info.
I have been vegetarian on/off for 35 years, was vegan for about 5 years sm
not that hard. Right now, I am having so many issues with food allergies and celiac disease, having to give up nightshade veggies...nothing left to eat. I am eating some meat now, but not when the gastroparesis sets in!
Being vegan is not hard...unless you are a celiac. This is how I figured out the celiac part because so many of the meat analogs and vegan packaged foods use gluten for the protein and I got really sick from it. I gave up all the premade things and the whole grains with gluten and I was fine.
There is vegan and then there is VE-GAN. By definition, vegans don't wear, use or consume anything that is derived of animals...no leather shoes, most shampoos and toothpastes are off the list, as are deodorants. No wool or silk. Anything with soap usually has animal byproducts. It is very involved and rather difficult to do.
Giving up meat, eggs and dairy is no big deal, except for cheese. You hear that ad about "comfort proteins" in a baby formula and there is such a thing. Mother's milk, be it human, cow, goat, whatever...contains a chemical that triggers the release of endorphins in the brain so that feeding feels good in more ways than one. The purpose of this is ensure that the nursed young want to nurse and thrive. Human milk has a lot of these, so does cow's milk and cow juice triggers the same reaction in the adult human brain. Cheese is concentrated milk and therefore these chemicals are also concentrated. As a result, cheese is an addictive substance. This is the hardest thing to give up when going vegan. Vegan cheese substitutes are nasty and they don't melt. If a dairy-free cheese melts, it contains casein, an animal protein and not vegan.
I studied this years and years and years ago
Most definitely is legitimate. In the late 1980s I studied to be a note reader scopist through a group called At Home Professions. I loved it, but unfortunately could not continue due to no funds. It was reading the court reporters notes which looked like a grocery receipt with a bunch of letters scattered on it. The weird thing was I found it extremely easy. For instance I would see a line that looked like: av e cr, and for some reason I would know what it said. My DH told me that's because I'm an alien and my ship landed in Roswell. HA HA. Well I know that a lot has changed, after all it's been over 20 years since I took the first course and know a lot of it is computerized now, but it is most definitely legitimate and I've heard people like to do it. I think I remember one of the courses was in medical terminology and another course was in legal terminology. Should be able to find a lot of it on google, or maybe go to your local college if they offer it and talk to an instructor.
My ex-hubby had it done.
He wasn't too keen on the idea either. He confided later that it was goofy stuff that bothered him--like what happens if there's an earthquake while he's on the table?
Anyway, he was tender for a day or two, but some Tylenol took care of it.
Actually I ended up having a tubal ligation done after we split up. That was pretty easy, too. They did it with a laparoscope, and used silicone squeeze clips on the tubes rather than cutting them. Easy peasy.
My hubby had one at about 46.
DH had anterior cervical laminectomy 2-3 years ago.
It was scary for me, and it was the only time they kept him overnight. They sent him home after rotator cuff and (of course) knee arthroscopy. The bad thing about Friday surgery is that the office isn't open if you have a question that doesn't seem like enough of an emergency to call about. They made DH a hard cervical collar ahead of time. Be sure they give you 2 sets of the cushion inserts for the collar, because you will want to be able to wash and air-dry one, but not have her without one. Do ask about whether she is to sleep with the collar on. Because DH had a plate put in, after the fact we were told that supposedly the collar was just to remind him to be careful, but he was sleeping with it on for about a week, I guess. Getting up and down out of bed was scary, especially because he wanted to sleep on his side. Very scary to get into that position, but once he was in it he could finally sleep. I was appalled how apneic he sounded at night. He always has a little problem, but with the collar on he was having pretty long pauses. He is a big guy and at risk for that anyway. The scariest thing for me when DH had this and the shoulder surgery is that he is 6 foot 2 inches and big. Me? 5 foot 6 inches and average weight. Thank goodness his mom was there for the shoulder surgery, but I think we did it alone for the neck surgery AFTER he stayed one night in the hospital. Oh, and because of the anterior approach, swallowing was hard for quite a while. Speech also was affected, maybe it was with hoarseness? Can't remember. Due to swelling, his throat was not totally normal again for 6 months after surgery.
You might rather be fat but my hubby
cooked some brown rice yesterday with garlic, red and green peppers, Kokoman sauce and other ingredients he just throws together. This was along with some turkey wings with a sauce that I spooned on the rice and cabbage with peppercorns. I cannot find a restaurant that can come close to his cooking. He never tastes and always hopes that I like it. I am 1 lucky girl. He is very mindful of eating healthy and we very seldom have red meat, once in a great while but his lemon chickens, marinated meats and other things make me really disappointed to eat out and then have inferior food. He says I can do the same. No thanks..... I will not shame myself. When he is gone from home (he drives and away) he fixes salads with his own dressings and OMG, I am just sitting here with a smile on my face. I am sure no one can compare with his foods!!
Hubby
I wonder if he is not looking. One of my daughter’s friends is having a birthday party Sunday. His mother drove by our house to drop off an invitation. We both talked for a while. She is a really an attractive lady. She looks like she could probably model swimsuits. Anyway, she had invited me to go jogging with her because I mentioned I was interested in getting into an exercise program. I am 60 pounds overweight. I also mentioned job burnout and told her I had been thinking about getting out of MT and the medical profession totally and going into something else. She told me that there maybe some job openings at the company she works at because they are expanding. She is also the supervisor of the collections/credit department there and told me of all the wonder benefits the company offers and told me that if I decided I wanted a change, she would put in a good word for me. Later I told H that she was nice. DH said, “I think she wants me (him)” I told him he was full of himself. Bad part is, 8 years ago I would have been jealous but now if he did run off with someone else, I think the sweetest revenge for me would be to let the woman keep him and give her full custody of MIL.
hubby
May be you 2 need to spice things up again. Like go out on dates, etc... It sounds like alot of your gyn issues could be effecting the way you look at sex. I would definitely talk to someone about it. May be there is a pill you can take!! :)
My hubby had 1 and did not like
He is a really neat guy and took so much time just cleaning after 1 use. I know some just use time and time again without cleaning but that is just not him, wants his spic and span each and every time.
I have used, my hubby believe it or not
was able to pull off an entire hair 1 time like that. It is really good for sparse hair and it does cover, comes in all colors and different sizes. He was going to a hatless place (because of his hair loss, he wears his hat all the time) but used that day and no one knew. Great stuff!
What would I do without hubby.
I feel guilty, but I didn't think I'd still be working at this age. My mom was a housewife, even though she had a college degree.
ex-hubby
That's funny - I did the same thing, although my son had NO contact with his father from the time he was 3. When he was getting married, (at 26), I asked him if he wanted me to contact his father. He said his "real" father would be there (my now husband who raised him) and that he didn't want some guy who with one squirt was labeled his "father" to be part of his life.
Afterwards, when he called and wanted to contact my son, I got his phone # and told him I'd have my son contact him if he wanted to. My son wouldn't even let me give him the phone #. Another bunch of time went by and he called again - how he keeps getting my phone number is behond me - first he found me in Connecticut, then Colorado and then Texas (he's in NY). This time he accused me of not giving his phone # to my son and I said I tried, but he didn't want it. He didn't believe me, of course, but I then got rid of my regular phone and got Vonage and I haven't heard from him since. But Ive never been sorry that it worked out this way. Serves him right for being a lousy father.
hubby
ONe thing i have learned is men ALWAYS think it is greener on the other side and come crying back because its not. So what if you have gained weight I am sure he has to. Do you believe he is being faithful to you? Maybe this is his way of feeling guilty for something he did while traveling. Try counseling. It worked for us. We all need to leave our hubbys for a week with the kids and ALL our jobs and let them see how tuff it really is. They feel since we work at home we have the freedom to do everything with time left over!! COME ON! I wish you lots of luck. I would tell him if you really loved me you would deal with me the way that I am. Yes I can try to change but is that really the root of the problem here. Sounds like an excuse! Sorry, but being organized and gaining weight should have nothing to do with if he still loves you or not. Tell him didn't he take the same vows as you did "Till death do us part"
My hubby is
incredibly wonderful. We will be married 20 years in October. We renewed our vows at 10 years (Just the 2 of us at a small chapel, well of corse a minister) and for 20 years the children want to be with us. There is a running joke in my family....My parents say that if we ever divorce, he can come "home".
hubby
ago and demanded my husband see his doctor. He went on Prozac and things were oh, so much better for a long, long time. Now he is off the Prozac, as he was tired of the side effects. We are back to the same crap as before, and I am so weary of it. I don't know what to do. I'm praying for wisdom. He just seems like he hates us all, that we are nothing but a pain in the a$$, and we all tread lightly because of his garbage. Unfair. Hugs to you.
That's where I'm from too, and hubby
was born in WV, but his dad moved them to Indiana when my hubby was very little. DH's dad was the first one in the family not to be a coal miner.
Hubby is a big packer fan, which sure makes my dad happy. The Packers are the only team I'll watch. Brett is adorable. I'm glad he has a super wife (since I can't have him :o>).
your hubby
I feel for you... and the signs seem pretty classic from here suggesting that he most likely has another lady. Cell phones may not work "out there" but somewhere along the way he eats, drinks, sleeps, etc and there are pay phones if nothing else. Your acceptance of his excuses give him the room to do as he pleases and his beating you down keeps you from thinking straight/catching him in his own game. Sounds like you need to dry those eyes and open them to take a good look at reality - then deal. It hurts and bites, but until you deal, nothing changes. If you really want to teach your kids about better relationships, show them the strength to stand for what is true and right.
How old is your hubby?
Mine's in his mid 50s. We had the same problem. Doc took a blood test and found very, very low testosterone, put him on replacement, and a month later he's got energy again! not just for sex, either, but work, yard work, repairs. Wonderful stuff, that, if it's used right!
My hubby and I...
still have long, passionate kisses...our kids complain all the time about it...*Geez Mom, Dad...that's sooo gross* We are always touching when we are together, whether it's holding hands, arms around each other, or just my/his hand on his/my leg...you have to keep the fire going or it will most certainly fade!
your hubby/his son
Just wondering what kind of "help" you were asking for from your FIL?
I know you were frustrated but just because he had not yet gotten hold of you doesn't mean he wasn't working something out to be able to help his son.
I remember once my aunt wrote a letter to my grandpa about how she thought he showed a preference for her brother and how upset she was about it. (She had seen her brother at my grandparents' house on a holiday and was so resentful that she had not also been invited.) My grandpa was so hurt by the letter. My aunt had assumed something happened that did not (the brother had just dropped by for an impromptu visit). She let her emotions carry her away, and really hurt her father.
It sounds like part of you might be blaming your FIL for your husband's behavior. That's not good. Your husband has to take full responsibility for his actions and you need to stop making excuses. I have a bipolar brother. He has been battling his problem for 15 years. Sometimes he tries to take his medications and make progress in his life and sometimes he sits and whines about how bad off things are and wants everybody to cater to him. Guess when he gets the best response from his family? Even though your husband has a mental illness, he is still responsible for getting treatment and not making the lives of everyone around him miserable.
If your FIL wants to help his other son, whether or not you think the guy should be hung from the highest tree or not, that is your FIL's decision.
Hubby and I do EVERYTHING sm
around here including remodeling. The only thing I hire out is twice a year I have someone come in and do the heavy spring cleaning because I have some medical problems that keep me from doing it. I can type three hours and pay for it. Matter of fact tomorrow is the day! YEAH.
I would love to be able to afford someone to do alot more of it but can't and hubby wouldn't let somebody else do it if we could afford it! Too picky!
Hugs to you and your hubby!!
My best friend had a miscarriage in 1994 and she still gets a little emotional when she talks about, even though she went on to have 2 healthy daughters.
Is your hubby active?
What I mean is he involved in outside interests clubs,volunteer ,maybe a hobby? I know a lot of yall here are still working fulltime, but there will come that day when you and hubby will be together all day side by side!! just wish mine would find an outside interest but he finds something wrong with any suggestion so I have quit saying anything he loves to stay at home.
Hubby obviously has issues
That the two of you can work on/out at a time that is much less stressful, so when situations occur, you're prepared.
If it had been me, at the moment he started screaming and yelling, I would have taken the kids and left the house. I would not have exposed my kids to all that anger, and making excuses for him doesn't make it all right. Yelling at you and the kids is abuse. If he wants to rant and rave by golly, he can do it by himself.
Hubby definitely into supplements and the like
so I will ask him to research about what you have said above and ask him to get for me. I might have said in the first post, the leg pains (only of a night)wake me from sleep. I at 1 time (knocking on wood as I type this) had electrical currents that would shoot up thru my foot- only when I walked and never knew when it was going to happen. These leg pains are deep, deep aching pains and when I wake, cannot find a comfortable position. Is this what your hubby had or similar? Don't know how the antidepressant would work, have never been advised to take but then again, have nothing for the deep aches either. Tell me how he was diagnosed, treatment so far, etc. Thanks.
What has worked with my hubby -
Men want to be fed. They want REAL food. To them, that means meat. I take hubby to Longhorn that night, he orders a big steak, potato, veggies, salad, etc. I also buy him some silk boxers with hearts on them and, well, you can guess the rest! He usually gets me candy and flowers, but he is always very surprised and happy when I do things for him this day. Good luck! :-)
I know my hubby is far too manly to take
bubble baths and neither does he burn candles. I think a lot of the younger men have been femininized. He is a very loving person but very much his own man. I really think you can thank women's lib.
You would really be surprised as maybe this is how your hubby is but
this man likes to watch Animal Channel along with me. We have been married for 7 years now and I can truthfully say he never drools, shy, quiet and reserved. More women could use a hubby like mine!
I am not saying my hubby doesn't look
he just doesn't let me see him looking. Hey, I still look too.
Yes, there is something that works, I know because hubby
did have sleep apnea, which is not just snoring but actually could be deadly. I knew what it was before his sleep study. He snored tremendously bad and worse when he was extremely tired. His brother who also has fell asleep, running off the road. Back to the deadly part of it, your esophagus collapses during periods of apnea and a person can suffocate. After sleep study, hubby put on continuous positive airway pressure. He always sleeps on his back and it has been extremely easy for him to wear. There is not a single peep out of him at night any more, total silence. Not only the quiet at night but also the quality of sleep is so improved for him. If you love the person in your life this is happening to, you will definitely sit up a sleep study and see.
I have seen the same from daughter and her hubby
and if a poll was taken, would be sure the same would be true here in a lot who say they love it. Ours was gone over with a fine-toothed comb and he just said too much trouble to clean each time so he got rid of it.
Too bad hubby spends like
he's a big kid with a credit card though! If he were a saver I could have retired by now!
My hubby is tops when it comes to anything
He has his own drill, not dental mind you but I showed him where the plate was hurting and he took care of that like he does most every other thing around this house. He is 1 in a million and makes me a very happy lady. You definitely want to stop the popping if you can because if you dont it will become a habit and get on folks last nerve - I know, my deceased husband used to sit and clack his and I could hear him doing it from the living room to a bedroom where I used to work. Drove me UP the walls. The only person I ever let get away with this and would have bit my tongue off before I said anything to hurt her feelings was my little mam-maw, bless her soul! I sure gave him the dickens, though. Best of wishes to your new chompers!
I do not cook but hubby does and
we can buy groceries for very little. How he uses the food is amazing. He can take 1 chicken breast and make a complete meal out of that. He usually fixes brown rice or pasta of some kind and adds this piece of meat cut into small pieces and adds his herbs, spices or the like to it. When we buy at the store usually get, say 3 chicken. He has these halved and being as we don't have children at home 1 side will do us- I like the white meat, he likes the dark, works out well. But if you have family, you could try the above- I never feel deprived, much to the contrary, my meals are delicious and never feel I am missing meat. He made a wonderful meal this past week using all kinds of onions, garlic, squash, zuccini (spelling?)and we had this over the rice- delicious! He uses a rice as the base with additions to that, such as cut up tomatoes, garlic, bay leaves and then the toppings. This is a very good way to extend your budget.
Oh, poor hubby. Now he has to do all the
driving of kids, cooking, laundry, vacuuming, etc. until your ankle heals. 'Cause you know, you're supposed to elevate your foot so it can heal.
No need to get mad - just apologize to him when you have to ask him to do all that stuff, LOL.
He'll never do that again.
:oD
Well at Bingo my hubby won 1,000 and then I won
$50.00 cash, went home that night and ran out of gas on the way. Stup.d
I'd have a conversation with hubby.
Stay calm, but tell him you consider this cheating. See his reaction. He will downplay it, I'm sure. Repeat that you consider it cheating, and since you do, will he stop? Ask him what he's looking for.
If you don't like his answer, then you have learned something very important about his character. Is this somebody you want to devote your life to and have children with?
P.S. Also than goodness for hubby
That's why I can work less than full-time.
Now if I could just control my spending!
I have a great hubby, too.
I'm very lucky.
Almost did not post about my hubby,
and did not want to get the backlash. I absolutely adore, love, respect and befriend my husband. He mirrors your hubby from the sounds of it. :)
My hubby's dog is gross sm
He's a Golden Retriever with a passion for stuffed toys that squeak. Loves to play with them, squeeze them to hear them squeak, throw them around and then tear them apart til he gets the little squeaker inside. We don't let him have those toys anymore because, well, he destroys them. Stuffing everywhere. Anyway, I went to call in the dogs earlier and, yep, there he was tossing something in the air. Turned out to be a baby rabbit, only about 4 inches long, just the right squeaker toy size. Poor thing, the dog kept chomping on it to hear it squeal. Took me 10 minutes to chase the dog around the yard in 95+ heat. I had to stop working for a half hour to bury it. First time he has ever done this and he knew I was mad. I couldn't look at him for 2 hours.
My hubby's dog is gross
[img]http://bestsmileys.com/sick/9.gif[/img] Awww, poor baby bunny and poor you. BAD DOG!
Heading to DC with my hubby. sm
My DS has been at Georgetown for the past week taking some medical classes that he will be able to get credit for once he starts college. We pick him up on Monday but DH and I are going up Saturday morning for a little alone time. Can't wait.
Just tell your hubby the guy at work is gay.
My hubby is the jealous type too. I am pretty flirty but would NEVER cheat on him. I would just tell him he's gay.
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