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Let it slide

Posted By: mt on 2008-05-05
In Reply to: In appropriate comments from - mother-in-law

From my experience the best thing is to let it slide, and if possible laugh if she says anything. Don't let her know it gets to you. At first I would say things, but then one day got called into her room and she closed the door behind her baracading me from leaving and proceeded to stick her finger in my face telling me she knows what my "game is", she acused me of trying to have an affair with her husband (ewwww!), and told me if I came between she and her son she would kill me no matter where I lived. Then proceeded to tell me I should go back to my home state "where your kind belongs". A little tough to do seeing as it is clear across the US (and we had good jobs where we were). After leaving her house that night DH and I drove home in complete silence both too shocked to even believe what happened. When I walked out of the bedroom he saw me white and asked what happened. All that came out was "your mom acused me trying to have an affair with ---". At that point she lunged at me with her fists clenched and DH jumped between us before she hit me. DH & I spoke with his siblings and they knew exactly what she was like so they were on my side and were sorry it happened. Needless to see we didnt speak to MIL for about 3 months, then slowly gradually did get togethers. After that she didn't say anything out of the ordinary. Unfortunately DH never stood up for me and told his mom she should apologize which I've never forgiven him for (that was 10 years ago and never will forgive him but that's another story, we just don't talk about it anymore) and glad to say we don't live in same state she does anymore. My advice to anyone about the MIL is never say anything because you will always be pitted as the "bad" one. Even though DH siblings knew she shouldn't have said those things, they too never stood up for me. So glad I don't live near them either.


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Cha Cha slide nm
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Sorry to be so ignorant. Is the show on a CD-ROM or old VCR tape? I recently saw one at a wake in a funeral parlor, they had a TV in back of the viewing room with the young woman's life on there and some beautiful flower pics here and there in between. It was very impressive but I could not really ask at such a private time when the family was suffering, I thought it was a beautiful touch and done very well.
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I used to let it slide, but I've been married 23 years.
Probably about year 5 or so, when we had children and she felt it necessary to comment on my mothering, I finally just gave it right back to her. She has four children, and the only one who turned out well was my husband, and I'm quite sure it's because he spent a lot of time away from home when he was growing up.

She lives just down the street, and now that we know where we stand, we have no problems.
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