No perfect family here sm
Posted By: anonamiss on 2008-11-11
In Reply to: I feel that way a lot, too. My mom is ill and elderly - s/m
When I was younger and innocent, I believed I had started a wonderful tradition of having my family over for the holidays because I was the oldest and first married. After many years of dysfunction, second marriages, sibling rivalry, etc., have gone back to the basics, just my husband, my kids and their kids. I no longer have to listen to, "I'm not coming if she's coming," etc. I no longer have to wash my house down from smoking and no longer have to pick up half-empty alcoholic drinks (which by the way causes more havoc and tongue slips). We are happier, saner, and sober and we enjoy the holidays much more than when I spent a whole week's pay on food and booze and much more than that on gifts for which I never got a thank you. I watch movies such as "Home for the Holidays, National Lampoon's Christmas" and other films such as those and laugh at what used to be. I'm free! Back to the basics of the reason for the season. Send nice cards, that's it, to the siblings. Miss my parents but that's in the past. I don't look back anymore. Hope they're with the angels enjoying themselves. I do get depressed but I fight it off, things have changed and I can't "fix people" anymore, I can only fix myself. I don't think there is a Hallmark perfect family. If there is, it's news to me!
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LOL - no such thing as perfect kid or perfect adult for that matter (nm)
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Yes, in a perfect world.....this one if FAR from perfect ; )
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Family is great but I am never back in my hometown where family is... So I always have extended fami
You can always pick your friends your stuck with your family. An Xmas for me is where my husband and kids come home to. It is what you make it!
Summer. Friends or family? Family. Tired or Awake?
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Big difference between family values and family jewels, eh? lol
LOL. I love this show. I think Gene and Shannon and her sister are a riot! What characters. It really is amazing to me the kids seem so laid back and so normal. They seem like great kids.
Does your family still do the early Sunday dinner w/family?
s
Oh, that's perfect. It's a bit more than 50, but I'm going
Perfect Day
Friday and today just perfect here on the coast of Maine. High 70's, clear bright blue sky, no humidity, endless sunshine, sparkling ocean. It doesn't get any better than this!
Perfect Mom
//
I think what you did was perfect (sm)
He will not forget you just being there letting him cry. Sometimes that's all you can do for someone who is experiencing any type of grief. He should start to feel better in the next couple of weeks but may end up doing better if he starts venturing out and at least thinking about others he might want to date in the future...? You are there for him, you listen and don't belittle him and you share in his pain. What more can anyone do? We want our children to never suffer but they do...and it makes them better people eventually. You're a great mom! :-)
Perfect, what's that.
:).
I always say about church too, when people think they are better than anyone else because they go to church every week,
well, I do not want to belong to a church where everyone is perfect. :)
(needless to say there are those that think I need to go to "pastor's wife school." LOL.
Sorry for getting off track.
Perfect
Yes this is great!
If I don't work for them or with them, I stay completely away from them. Learned that in a book called "How to deal with difficult people," and another book on verbal abuse.
It is all about control with these types. If they can't control you, they will get angry, but if you just clam up, be nice like the poster said above if you have to see them, just smile and say nothing.
For me, since I work at home, if I run into one of these at my husband's job (he's a pastor so there are a lot of these types at church), I just stay away from them completely. Use caller ID. Do not open the e mail, etc. They eventually give up on me and try someone else. But I think this is why I don't work in an office anymore and I pick and choose who I deal with or not. Took counseling though because I used to want to be nice to everyone and always especially the difficult ones, because I wanted them to "like me." Now, I want to be liked by mentally healthy people, not control freaks. Long story short, no info to them, smile, walk away and if you can stay completely away from them. Remember, it's them not you! Good luck.
Wow, Perfect example.
That should have never happened. It was malicious or intended but things happen through carelessness. I don't think teenagers or young adults really get that until they either experience something like this or close to it first hand or have children who depend on them. It puts life in a completely different perspective. What a shame.
Her mother was not perfect and she
did not "raise" Daniel either. Her mother was not a saint and all of their problems did not just stem from Anna's problems.
and I'm sure you're perfect
with no quirks at all LOL
So because this world is far from perfect--sm
we are just supposed to toss up our hands and say *oh well, that is the way it is, so just let it be*? I don't think so. Evil is as evil does. We are supposed to fight evil, not hold hands with it. BE the change you want to see in this world. Only we can change it and not by sitting on our *** saying "Oh well, that's the way of the world." jeez, how blind!
Ooohh, that's a perfect one. Thanks! nm
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It's the eyes - too far apart - I'm perfect!!
I am not always, perfect with it, but have learned that
a whole week or a month. Enjoy yourself now and again and have what you want is also the key for me.
Will power and determination, and prayers, coming you way !!
Well, I'm as big as a horse lately - so it's perfect ! LOL (nm)
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You must have perfect gaydar then
A person who has spent a lifetime faking being straight can be pretty darn good at it - some nerve you have acting like any wife that has been deceived this way should have known! People who marry for ulterior motives can be very convincing and even superior people such as yourself may someday get deceived.
In a perfect world
What is your idea of a perfect world - it can be anything from the craziest of crazy ideas to very simple ones. Here's my ideas:
1. No more pharmaceutical commercials. Let our doctors tell us what meds we need, not us tell our doctors we think they should give us.
2. Pharmaceutical companies would not "rule the doctors" (okay sort of part #1, but a little different).
3. No more "stup!d" commercials that demoralize our intelligence like the pepto bismol commercial, free credit report, and about 95% of the other commercials.
4. Every child would be considered a gift from the gods (whatever one you believe in), and their lives would be treated as precious as they are and there would be no killing or abuse of young children. If parents cannot handle having children they would bring them to the nearest safe place and say I can't handle this anymore, please let someone else take care of them (instead of killing and burying them out where no one can find them). Then couples who can't have children would have a chance.
5. The government would tell us the truth about why they are spraying chemicals (chem trails) into the atmosphere and poisoning all of us.
6. The goverment would tell us what's up with the UFOs instead of keeping it a secret. I think we are all adults and can handle the truth.
7. Hollywood actors & actresses would quit announcing to everyone all the lavish money they are spending on themsleves (mansions, $12,000 coffee table, etc) and instead we would hear that Brad & Angelina spent that $12,000 to help the hungry and needy.
8. They would turn all the abandoned buildings into housing for the homeless.
9. People wouldn't be fighting against each other "only" because of what political party they belonged to, and politicians would keep the promises they make while they are campaigning (haven't met one yet that did).
10. Lawyers would not be trying to re-write the constitution.
11. All people would be considerate of their neighbors and not mow their lawns after 8 pm in the evenings or before 8 am in the mornings.
12. Everyone could pick whatever time you wanted to start working and quit working.
13. We would have an alternative reliable transportation method instead of plane, train, or automobile similar to the transporter you see in Star Trek. So if you live in Washington state, you could still go to Maine for dinner and be back by 9pm.
14. There would be no more gangs. The people who want to be part of a gang would now be part of an Infantry unit. They would learn out to use weapons but they would use them responsibly.
15. There would be no more bullies in the school system.
16. There would be no animal abuse. Every person would take care of animals and love them, and if caught being cruel to an animal you get branded or something so that everyone in public would know that person is cruel to animals and they would be ashamed of what they've done.
17. No more reality shows. Enough with American Idol and Survivor.
18. Scam artists would not try to swindle money out of people (especially the elderly).
19. Everyone would grow food in their yards and neighbors share with others.
Perfect example... thank you for supplying that
This is exactly what my post was about. I did not once try to conform anyone to my beliefs. I was simply stating what I know/believe to be true. So, why just because I am quoting the Bible and talking about Jesus am I all of a sudden trying to conform someone? Why is it that whenever a Christian makes a STATEMENT, someone comes along and accuses them of forcing their opinion on someone else. You got on here and freely placed your opinion about the Bible and if I post something that goes against that, the world considers ME wrong.
There is no perfect grass for
all the zones in the US. I remember reading about the product a while ago, and it definitely is not suited to our climate here in NC. I'm pretty sure it's all about the magic of marketing.
Here is another site discussing the product:
http://malaysia.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070414110548AALxgyj
He IS perfect and he's now on my desktop!! sm
He made me laugh out loud... something I haven't done for a while... so now he can make me smile every day.
I have 2 sweet mutts of my own, but I can see them anytime. He is just a LOVER!!!
My daugher used to have a boyfriend named Cody... kinda looks like him... ;-)
you are a perfect example of being 'hooked',
feeling better when you are under the influence, is exactly what drives you to be constantly in this state.
Do you know your limits and do they get higher and higher?
I bet you did not stop, but are hiding it from your children.
You will really have bad, bad withdrawal symptoms in case you really decide to stop or are forced to put a stop this.
No offence, though!
SIL family, us and another family snacked,played
x
perfect example of a mother being delusional?..sm
I feel for you.....I didn't exactly have this situation but had an older sister and I was the *accident* 18 months after her birth and my mother NEVER let me forget it....
A cousin told me when I turned 40...*you tried for 40 years, don't waste the next 40* and boy THAT was a huge ATTA GIRL for me because I spurned the woman and avoided her as much as possible, realizing at about age 20-30 just how poisonous she was. I forgave her many times in my head/heart and to myself (though she never once apologized nor said she ever might have done things wrong/incorrectly), and when I had my child I even let her in for 4 years, until she started pumping/manipulating the child and the child's responses and then booking all her $$ on what a 4 y/o could remember/say and then holding it against us (her parents). That was the icing on the cake, the straw that absolutely broke the camel's back for me.
I realized early too that my mother missed the entire journey in the life..... BTW, my sister committed suicide 30 years ago.....the 1st born, best loved....where was mom all that time prior.....(selfish woman emotionally). I am so opposite and happy and have not missed a thing (well, except for the physical grief the first 18 years of life...think Mommie Dearest).
Be well and thanks for sharing.....
Thanks Marilyn. I believe anything is possible. If I were say that my life is 100% perfect, I'd b
lying but having this man in my life is a true blessing. I've had to deal with the aftermath of raising 2 children that lived in the dysfunction. My daughter has issues due to the abuse she also suffered and no one would ever believe what we have gone through with this child (she is almost 20 and still a handful)..I pray somedays she will come to terms with everything and realize it wasnt her fault. I blamed myself for staying so long. My son is now 26, and at times, I see his father in him in regards to how he treats his GF with jealous fits, controlling etc.. and right then and there I have lined him out. As long as I am alive he will NEVER treat a female the way I was treated. I point blank told his GF that she should nip it in the bud NOW and not be so passive, because once you give them that power, you will have lost yours. She has slowly been standing up to him, and the more I have talked with him, the more he understands that what I really endured was abuse (he worships his dad). My daughter and I got the brunt of the abuse because we're female and all females are ...well you know the rest (in his opinion)... So, needless to say, my new husband (well not so new...5 years) and the love of my life has stood by me through all the awful teenage years and more. I have stories to tell...trust me.. but he loved me and stayed there. I still work 80-90 hours a week. I became a work alcoholic after years of being single and a single mom and am not sure how to stop. Obviously, my husband does not work but he is the house husband. He does all the cooking, cleaning, laundry etc..AND..he adopted my youngest son who was just a baby when we met..I just feel like God finally heard me..all those days and nights when I didnt think I could take another breathe and I prayed for it to end...he heard me..and brought me my angel.. Okay..that's my deal for the day.. back to work.. LOL Thanks for listening to my long, long story.
YES! Our perfect season is still untouched! :-)
I kinda liked the half-time show, though. Tom Petty is my man! :-)
I didn't get to watch the first half and from what I read below, I guess I didn't miss a whole lot. The second half was probably the best well-played football I've ever seen.
Not bragging or claiming to be perfect...
I am adult enough to know how to prioritize my day and my life without it it draining me or causing me to panic or neglect myself. Perhaps you have too much on your plate and either need to give something up or delegate to others. Oprah, Marth Stewart, The View, and shows of their ilk have done nothing but depress the women of today....make them feel worthless if they can't do it all and make everyone happy, all the while neglecting themselves. I am not a doormat because I don't allow anyone to treat me like one. There is a saying that you teach people how to treat you and I firmly believe that. Why feel guilty about taking some time for yourself? I just don't get it.
You made perfect sense -- it only went to him
Unless you put her name on the CC of the new email or hit reply to all, it only went to him. Whew - you can breathe easy again!
patch perfect grass
does it work and how much is shipping?
You did it PERFECT! That was 'way cool.
The poo-phobia cracked me up! And so does the mental image of blowing up stuffed animals at a shooting range. Instead of animals, though, I think I'd blow up the Michelin Man and the Pillsbury Doughboy. The only animal would be Snuggles the Bear from the toilet tissue commercial.
Prior progesterone levels were perfect...sm
so that's part of the "how did this happen?" question. These are the only 2 times I've been pregnant. With the first pregnancy we never had a heartbeat registered on sonogram. I'll know more in a couple of hours today what the end results of the labs are.
I never said I was perfect, you don't have to be rude. I posted what I do and it works
t
Best mortgage company for not so perfect credit?
I am looking to buy a house that is $185,000. From the sale of my current home, I will make $165,000 and will use all of that as a down payment. Obviously, I am 20k short. I don't have the best credit (low FICO score) so I am looking for a mortgage company that will loan me what I am short with bad credit. Anyone know of any?
Thanks
Perfect example of a woman who married the money
Amen and OP. Thanks for the perfect punch lines for
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Oh sweetheart, give it a rest already..we know how perfect you are..
we heard your opinion honey, go back to work now.
Your suggestion makes perfect sense to me...sm
If you had a backache and knew how your partner should massage your back to relieve the pain, you'd tell him what to do, wouldn't you? Perhaps we shouldn't expect partners to be mind readers!
Oh, Miss Perfect, people in glass houses
It sounds to me like her daughter turned out just fine. I'm sure there are a lot of skeletons in your Christian closet so should keep hypocritical mouth shut, I'd say.
Perfect start - totally absolutely 100% all the way agree
And I've got only two words for the people who try to defend them.
I posted Lee Perfect sounded like fake nails and
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From This Moment by Shania Twain. Perfect wedding song. nm
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family
No she did not have Daniel throughout his whole life but there were times when he shouldn't have been with her but her mother would not take him without money. She was living in a motel with a bfriend and Daniel. She was broke and it was not pretty she had some really rough times and she was not always the "playboy" girl she worked in some really raunchy clubs.
I dont know about a brother but it has been a long long time age I do remember meeting a "sister" once and lots of different "boyfriends". There was always someone with their hand out.
I give her mother the benefit of the doubt but look at how things are going and what her mother is doing. There have been lots of back and forths in Vergie and Nicki's relationship and none of it has EVER appeared loving. Nicki was not innocent but I think she grew up and moved on with her life and her mother still wants to talk about her little Vicki.
No one is perfect not me, not you neither was Nicki, but her past was her past and she needs to be laid to rest, she went to extremes to establish her wishes let her be. Nicki is gone but the baby is here and needs to be sheltered from all this hoopla!!!
when it is a family, the family tends to think
since an addition is being made to a family during pregnancy, a lot of families see themselves as pregnant - as one - as a whole unit...nothing wrong with it - actually makes the entire family participate in it, which is a GREAT thing............not like the men of the 1950s who went to work and the moms did absolutely everything else....I like men/families who WANT to take part and be involved.
Old fashioned or not - I prefer the way the men participate today in all of it..........makes for better communication and all know what's going on in the family....
FYI to all, keep your old fashioned minds open because a closed mind will make you old WAY before your time.
There are 4 in our family and we each sm
get to pick one definite thing to do. My hubby says that is his pick. LOL
All the best for you and your family and keep..sm
 Keep us posted here - I will remember your *handle* countrymt and will be on the lookout for your posts!!!
I have family down there
My husband is originally from Boston, and we go down about once a month or so for a few days to visit his parents, brother, etc. It's kind of like a second home for me!
Family
My heart goes out to you, as I too understand that kind of pain from family. Just know that it is not you that is causing this rift. It is your brother, not his wife even though it is obvious that she is doing the manipulating. Your brother should not be able to be manipulated so easily by his wife's insecurities and jealousy of your relationship. Unfortunately in life, and in families perceptions get screwed up with time, and distance, and if one does not hold true to their fondness of one another, or respect or what I call the family gene that holds a family together through thick or thin, then there is nothing you can do about this situation. He obviously cannot hold true to his feelings for you because of his wife's insecurities. Just let things be and don't become bitter or begin to cut yourself off. Sometimes things change down the road for the better.
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