Tell me some about your granddaughter,
Posted By: Sorry on 2009-03-17
In Reply to: moving - Nature
please.
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My granddaughter is only 2-1/2, but I already
jdkjdkld
Does my granddaughter count? nm
xxx
Sad letter to granddaughter
My GD has started college now. This is son's child. I have posted here before but for years I was always put on the backburner, her maternal side of the family always came first. I tried, really tried, took the entire family on wonderful vacations, bought clothes, gave them this and that but hardly any visits (passed me by on the way to the other GMs home) - always calls though from DIL but I so wanted to speak with my own son some. Oh, I could see and talk with him when I paid to have work done around my home (although on the maternal's side, GM and great-GM always had yard cleaning, painting, whatever done as freebies.) It really hurt my feelings. My DIL's family have no outside friends, just family and thick as thieves so I was the outsider. I remarried about 7 or so years ago and have wonderful man for a husband, spoils me and we have, in our golden years, much to be thankful for, jobs, travel, wonderful relationship. After my son wanted to give me a tongue lashing about what he perceives me to get in money from my father's estate, I had enough and basically threw in the towel. Just too much to take any more abuse, verbal or otherwise. I get letter yesterday from my GD asking me why did I give up "blood" for my present husband? I could not believe what she said. She said saw her great-aunts more than she does me or even communicates with me- This went on from the time she was born and it was due to her mother basically taking the kids around her family more than me. I used to cry, I was sad but finally just gave up and I mean no visits, no calls, no nothing. I cannot tell her why- she probably would never believe me and why should she? She is her mother's daughter and extremely close to the maternal side. I wrote her back and told her unable to say why, would not be believed anyway- would only cause people to feel worse towards me (I never explained to anyone there why I stopped coming around- just stopped). I have been passed over all these years, just basically ignored when it came to the kids and now this?? I told her I would be the fall guy and to believe the ones she has heard for years, I would have nothing more to say. My father (prior to his death) had given the GD and her brother both $5,000.00 in their high school years to buy their clothing until they got out of HS- her mother spent that but does this daughter know? I kept that a secret- never said anything, would not be believed probably but yet this GD says I bailed when times got tough? My father also gave the GD and her brother (both my g-children) $20,000.00 several years ago for their college- I have no idea if any of that left in the bank as after father's death the parents of these children had access to the accounts- and yet I am to blame for bailing so to speak? I could write a book on this. My heart has been heavy for years but no way could I find to squeeze into their lives and now this. The no visiting and so forth started way before this marriage and now I have a DH who loves and adores me and yet I am catching flak for dropping out. My GD says the bad thing is that I seem to be content with things as they are- I have had to learn to live and accept things as they are if I could not change them and I am content now .Anyone else have a similar problem? Oh BTW, I moved to my new home in 2004- son who lives about 15 minutes away has never been to my new home nor even called.
to raising my granddaughter
Thank you for all the information. I may email you as this thing goes along. What a mess for the kids. I wish the mom would get some help, but she is perfectly happy in the drug world and doesn't see a thing wrong with it. Thanks again for the info.
Well, have a granddaughter, similar situation
never hear from her, in same town, no calls, no visits. She graduated high school this year- I got invite - did not go, my gift nada. Why should I put myself out if others don’t seem to care about me??
Young Frankstein is my granddaughter's
favorite movie of all time!
When I adopt my granddaughter in a couple of years
it is not going to make a difference to her dad - he could care less about her (literally). With my daughter, though, our relationship is already nonexistent so I don't think it could get any worse when I change her daughter's last name to my maiden name. She is more upset that the child has become accustomed to me being the one "playing" momma and calls me that sometimes. I don't refer to myself as "mamma" to my GD, but she choses it to use it from time to time. My daughter thinks she can spit out a kid, walk away from it, and still take all the credit for success at potty training, dance recitals, the child's extensive vocabulary...all the while not visiting, only calling once every few months, not paying court-ordered child support, send presents on special occasions...
A name is just a name. My 4 yo GD told my daughter she was going to call her "sissy" now instead of "momma." My daughter started crying and the child said, "don't cry. We'll find a way for all of us to be together somehow." Out of the mouths of babes. Think my daughter actually heard the child was saying she wanted all 3 of us to have a relationship? Nope. Too wrapped up in herself to listen.
I think people overreact to names. I think it is the relationship that counts, and if the family of Heartbroken doesn't see that, it is the child's loss and that is who I feel sorry for.
3 yo granddaughter got super-glue in hair,
at her other grandma's house. Is there any way you know of to get this out and same from cutting her beautiful hair off ?? thanks.
Used to do the seatbelt thing, too, till 4 yr old granddaughter told me "Nana, we don't take o
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