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ROFL You're right! Truly! A flying monkey could do this with a little training!

Posted By: Amy on 2005-08-09
In Reply to: Becoming a nurse requires education and certification. - Oh, please!

You can get the training on the job as easily as anywhere else.

Like I said before, yes - MT schools will give ground work but it isn't necessary!

Wayyyy too many of us learned this without schools! ROFL

No degree, no certification, no license required!!

Best MTs I've ever known NEVER had "proper education" while those coming from MT schools NEVER got any better than their starting point!!!

ROFL


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    so let me get this right...you're IN training right now so
    we could definitely call you a newbie. Maybe even a pre-newbie. So you don't have experience either, which means things like FTP sites, word expanders, productivity tips, etc. are new to you. This MTSO is going to give up her time (which Patti says she can do a 15 page report herself in an hour) to train you. So she is giving up anywhere from $30-$60 an hour to train you. Which means she is INVESTING in you and she has a right to get a return on her investment, hence the 5 cpl rate. Then she is offering you work on an account in which you will already have experience on, and have templates and word expansion for. Then you will be doing big reports (which are good because it means you sit in the chair longer and ultimately average better production) in a relatively easy specialty. When you finish training with her (say in 3 months), she will be offering 6 cents per line to a newbie without two years experience and I see postings all the time for 7-8 cpl for jobs that demand two years experience.  So..... I guess it all depends if you have a better offer... but think carefully, because if you blow this one, she'll offer it to someone else and then we'll see you over on the New MT/Student page, whining about how you can't find a job...
    Same planet as you, hon! And you're TRAINING the program right now. Duh!
    That's the whole process per individual dictator, per individual account.  Takes a wee bit of fine tuning, and in a few months, its PERFECT. Just minor editing. Wake up and smell the coffee.  You're training it and teaching it! You're not seeing the finished product, cause it doesn't need you anymore! Some of you just post so foolishly - and anyone could know the facts if they just paid attention and asked questions! You are training ASR and when you're done training it, its 1000 times better than the average skilled MT these days!
    Nope. Key is training when they're pups.

    My dog knows better than to come near my office space.  I've never had to so much as speak to him.   All I had to do when I set up my office and he stuck his nose in was to say "no" and he's never ventured near since (almost 2 years).


    I've never yelled at my dog and have never even dreamed of whacking him with a newspaper or anything.  I just taught him when he was a puppy that no means no, the difference between my "authority voice" and my "fun voice" and that he gets rewarded for his good behavior.


    He knows that hyperactivity is for outdoors only and even my kids know that if they want to get the dog hyper, they need to take him outside.  He also knows better than to venture near the dinner table when we are eating.


    But WE also know that he is a dog.  Sure he's a "member of our family" but he's a dog.  He has his dog bed, his dog toys, his dog food and his bag of dog treats for good behavior. And this is because?. . . . .he is a dog.


    My cats don't come in my office either, but that's because I hiss at them. 



    Yes. Three months paid training? That's just ridiculous unless you're working
    in the office.  What service can afford to pay an MT for three months of training?
    ROFL - do folks eat it vertically??? *ROFL..nm
         
    I saw this happen in MQ office while training. Supervisor was supposed to be training but
    account was behind so she did transcription while she collected salary for "training" me. Of course I asked others for guidance rather than bother the furiously typing supervisor. I don't know if she cherry picked but she definitely double dipped into the MQ payroll.
    You are either guillable or you are top mgt flying a balloon.

    I could tell you I will pay you a million bucks every pay period if you do 16,000 lines (which by the way 16,000 lines is almost impossible even on a good account and where they don't give you nothing but leftover dregs), but if there is no work there and they have overloaded the account with MTs, it's just so much BS.


    I personally think you are just top mgt with your bunch of balloons.  Many folks are leaving MQ and so are accounts.  Well, that's the talk on the street and also what I'm hearing from other MTs.  If you take a look at the internet you can see hospitals are taking their transcription back in house anyway. 


    See the world as it goes by on my carosol.


    Close your eyes and make a wish


    By the wishing well


    Bright yellow "balloons" shiny and new


    Play in the summer air


    All these things I know are true


    My carosol took me there


     


     


     


    Any flybabies here? Having trouble flying. n.m.
     
    QA response to flying fingers
    I know exactly what you mean.  In the company I work for, there is 1 QA director which is in charge of 100% hold and then there are 7 shift QA people.  I was told by the head QA person what a great job I have done and was released 3 weeks into QA.  then begin to send to clininc with sending in docs with blanks and oh my god I am made to feel like my job is on the line at night when I sign off by these people. I was even told by one that if I though the doc was good enough with just a few blansk go ahead and send them in,  and of course my check is still not here from the 15th,  I guess we are just expected to keep up the typing with no pay and all the belittling we have to put up with.  If I do receive pay today I am not going to type today.  MY time is to valuable just to type for the heck of it. 
    I was told a monkey could do my job - sm
    I transcribed for five doctors, 3 nurse midwives, all the correspondence, answered the phones, copied multiple charts a day - all in 8 hours with no overtime. When the office manager told me a monkey could do my job - I quit.

    A year later I was in the office - the office now had 3 doctors, 1 midwife, a secretary copied the medical records and answered the phones and handled correspondence and TWO TRANSCRIPTIONISTS could not keep up with just the transcription and were on overtime.



    Monkey's are too smart for the job! LOL - nm
    x
    Monkey bar injuries
    Actually there is more than broken bones that occur. When my daughter was 7 she was not tall enough to reach the steps after she crossed the bars and while trying to reach her hands slipped. She ended up falling and straddling the step(bar), which resulted in surgery 9 hours later, after 7 pelvic exams, at the Children's Hospital. She tore both sides of her urethra from the impact. While waiting in recovery I was commenting to the nurse that I could not believe playing on the playground at recess ended us up in the hospital, she said they saw the same injury numerous times a year and most schools take the monkey bars out when they replace the playground equipment. Ours did.
    oh good grief - hit by a flying troll
    I remember gas 25 c - cruising main street after buying $2 worth Ha, that was after I bought a pack of cigarettes out of the cig. machine for 35c - man o man those were the days when I was cool
    flying BACK to Manhattan where I lived -
    had to stay where I was for another two weeks until flights were scheduled to fly into LGA.
    "content slob with flying fingers" ?? NM
    .
    A monkey could do your job then. Doctors mispronounce
    things all the time, they even spell things wrong.  It is our job to type the proper word and it might not be the word you hear.   Do what you want, but if you can't produce a quality product time to look for another job. 
    a monkey can learn to type (cut off)
    x
    Keep your kids off the monkey bars
    How many reports have I typed just this week, 7 year old fell off the monkey bars, sustained both bone forearm fracture.  Monkey bars must be among the most dangerous things on earth.  Always hear warnings to keep kids off trampolines but I've never typed anything on 7 year old fell off trampoline.
    Your post cracked me up! Flying Hotwheels! So funny!
    My kids are teens, but still...I'm doing QA now, and I really need the house QUIET to hear every syllable every second!  So, before when I used to "just" transcribe, all H*ll could be breaking out around me - TVs blaring - phones ringing - kids playing/fighting/arguing/singing, whatever, and only occasionally would I scream out "BE QUIET - I'VE GOT ONE OF THOSE DICTATORS"...and a hush would fall over the house...even the dogs would put their paws over their ears and hunker down. Then you'd hear my stomping on the foot pedal, huffing in disgust, and then after about 30 seconds, I'd yell "ALL CLEAR", and chaos would resume! Now that its QA, boy, they are experiencing culture shock.  Now I've always got "THOSE DICTATORS"... so its been a few months now, and I've still not yelled "ALL CLEAR", and probably never will again!
    there is a world of difference between MT training and NP training
    honestly, I am in nursing school and have lots of health care experience as a paramedic and medical assistant. I think you can relax and leave your family's health either in your mother's hands or their physician's...
    Who croaked and made you head monkey? You are so full of yourself.

    I love it! Chunky Monkey. That is what me and my mother call my daughter. sm

    Not to her of course.. She is 10 years old and in a size 14 to 16.  We know it is only a spurt because her father is over 6 ft and I am 5 ft 3 in, not overweight, but spreading.


    Monkey has been her nick-name since she was a baby and now when my mother and I are discussing me shopping for clothes for 10 y/o, playing soccer for exercise, etc., we refer to her as chunky monkey.


    Just thought I would share that with you.


    Yeah, we have no skills or intelligence whatsoever. We just fill in blanks! Geez! A monkey can le

    Is that all you do, type?  It's not all I do either.  I have to know what I'm talking about, apparently you don't because you can just leave blanks!


    Monkey bars aren't the problem. I never once fell off. Neither did my brother. Kids need to climb
    c
    I hate it when birds do that. We had swarms of birds flying around
    our house a couple of weeks ago. I was trying to work and kept seeing black things whizzing by the living room window. When I looked outside, the birds were all over the fence, lawn, trees, car, and garden. It was like the old Alfred Hitchcock movie. Creepy birds. DH likes them and keeps putting birdhouses and feeders out. I can't stand the bird doodoo everywhere.
    ROFL!!
    and if you toss them a beer every now and then, they'll fall asleep a whole lot faster!
    ROFL!

    ROFL
    //
    ROFL here, too. nm :)
    :)
    ROFL
    "I Shot The Seriffff"...went up in pitch on the end like someone was squeezing where he wished they wouldn't. HAHAHAHAHA Hadn't laughed like that in awhile.
    ROFL
    x
    ROFL!!!!!
    x
    ROFL!!!!! nm
    x
    ROFL!!!!!
    .
    ROFL....................
         
    ROFL!
    aa
    ROFL
    On the other hand, we all probably need a lot less penile bladder in our diets.

    Thanks for making my morning!
    ROFL!!!

    ROFL! I'm with ya there!
    My sis is a flight attendant and loves to spontaneously fly into town for a day THEN call me to see if I can a)pick her up from the airport or b)hang out with her for the day.

    And she always does this during the week.

    My hubby always tells me, "treat it like a real job"...as if it was a FAKE job. LOL...
    ROFL!
    I forgot about that aspect of it! We were told in Cincinnati that we should wear anything we want as long as didn't offend the sensitivities of our coworkers. LOL!
    Okay HIGH FIVE!! ROFL
    x
    rofl. MD just came in and i asked, here's what he said
    the pt has a "sort of meandering gait"   LOL
    ME TOO! ROFL That's why I suggested it!!
    Mom's know best, huh?! :)


    ROFL! I tried something similar.
    I told my boys that they'd have to hug each other, apologize and tell each other three nice things if they were mean to each other.  They're such twerps that it didn't work.  They'd bearhug each other as hard as they could, sneer sorry, and say something like, "Your breath no longer smells like a camel's backside."  I give up.
    ROFL! Thanks for the memory.
    It was horrible at my last job.  The supervisor told us to never, ever touch the thermostat.  She'd sit in her office with a heating vent and get too hot, so she'd turn the heat down.  My cubicle was by the windows in the winter with subzero temperatures.  I was so cold that I had on my winter coat, gloves and a blanket.  Then in the summertime, it was too hot with the sun reflecting through the windows.  I used to climb up on my desk and change the thermostat anyway.  I loved ticking that woman off because she was such a shrew.  She was firing any employee who had more than 10 years of service because they were making too much money.  She could hire college grads with more technical skills at lower wages.  So much for not discriminating against people for their age.  The things she wrote them up for were asinine.
    ...and someone who does not use commas. ROFL! nm.
    nm.
    ROFL at what this MD just dictated...sm
    NEUROLOGIC:  He does have diminished memory.  I did start him on Aricept for this last year, but he has forgotten to take it. 
    NAILS??????? ROFL

    ROFL! Thanks for the chuckle.
    I needed it today.
    naw...you must be joking *ROFL....SM

    Of course more than just gay people have AIDS/HIV........sheesh -


    I was specifically talking about the GAY community going to Mexico in the early 1980s.........nobody else.


     


    This is Hilarious, ROFL. Sm.

    This is rofl, for real


     


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMH0bHeiRNg%20