Home     Contact Us    
Main Board Job Seeker's Board Job Wanted Board Resume Bank Company Board Word Help Medquist New MTs Classifieds Offshore Concerns VR/Speech Recognition Tech Help Coding/Medical Billing
Gab Board Politics Comedy Stop Health Issues
ADVERTISEMENT




Serving Over 20,000 US Medical Transcriptionists

Finances were a real sore spot in our marriage for a long time

Posted By: Rad MT on 2007-08-06
In Reply to: Banking accounts - My cup of tea

But my husband was in the military for 12 years, and he was away quite a bit, so I had to take over the finances. When he was home and he was paying the bills, he would get so upset because he felt there wasn't enough money and "where does all the money go?" "why don't we ever have any left?" was all I heard. I finally told him I was taking them back over because I was sick of hearing that every month. I put everything on MS Money, categorize it, subcategorize it, and add memos, so if he wants to know exactly where the money is going, all he has to do is look.


Funny....he really hasn't complained a whole lot since.




Complete Discussion Below: marks the location of current message within thread

The messages you are viewing are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select the boards given in left menu


Other related messages found in our database

Their hormones will get to them long before the marriage bug will. nm
s
No! That sounds too desperate. TIME. Just give it TIME. If it is real, then sm
something will definitely evolve. If you like him, flirt back! Don't act desperate because if he DOES like you, then the suspense will just make him want to get to know you more. Trust me on this.

I worked in the medical records department of a hospital when I was single and dated a few co-workers in my early 30s. It was fun. Nothing serious came about any of the relationships.

This sounds like fun - the beginning of maybe something to come....Keep us informed.
yep, regret marriage. been in it way too long to be unhappy and wasting life. nm
;
I had it during my pregnancy a long, long time ago. Husband
aa
time for some marriage counseling?

or at least a long talk with your husband if possible. Not by e-mail! Good luck!


The next time I decided to make real
mashed potatoes. Didn't know how many potatoes I needed for 2 people, so I peeled about 6 or 7 potatoes. Once again, too many taters! LOL!
...on a search. Or look for real time status, road conditions, etc. for
s
For a long time
when I had a "real job" as my husband would say, I skipped breakfast every morning. I am just NOT a morning person and could not get up early enough for it no matter how hard I tried. it was coffee and out the door! I think coffee is an appetite suppressant because once I stopped it I had to have breakfast every morning.

My husband is still in the coffee only work routine without breakfast. Then he wonders why he is hungry before bed and wants another meal.
a very long time ago
When Dr. Green died, I was done.
A long time ago, when
they apparently had a man come in with a misplaced mustard bottle. You have to understand her twisted humor, because she tells the story and says he was just "spreading a little sunshine," (a reference to an old ad campaign).
My prescription ran out a long time SM

ago (for ADD), but I may go back to the doctor after the New Year for a refill.  My life's been utter chaos since I ran out of medication a year ago.  It helps me focus/stay on task--i.e., make my lines--,stay better organized, etc. (a nice side effect is the help it gives me in staying awake during the day).  I was diagnosed a couple of years ago and although I've felt a little awkward about the whole situation (with doc and with pharmacist), it really does help me.  I only jokingly suggested Ritalin to the OP.  I know that's a medication that should not be taken lightly.


It's almost 2 a.m.!  I better get to sleep as I start work in a few hours! (See? That's more than likely a major contributing factor to my symptoms...poor sleep hygiene!)


Goodnight and sweet dreams!


Chickadee


3 years is a long time. Don't you think
What if the carpet store does not have the same carpet after 3 years.  Also, carpet repairs are not cheap.  You have to pay labor and the cost of materials.  It would probably be easier just to get the whole room replaced or simple as it sounds, put a throw rug over it and call it a day.
As a long-time cat servant...
and LOTS of training supplied by furs over the last 24 years....I would have to say you have it covered!!  Mine have done well with these measures although I have 2 who do 'punish' me when we return by either ignoring my requests for kitty love or not letting me close a door (but then cat servants usually learn that going to the bathroom alone is a thing of the past).  Have fun and don't worry!
I gave up a long time ago........sm
I gave up a long time ago trying to enlighten those not in the teaching profession what goes into this career. Most people who "poo poo", saying the pay is more than adequate, do not have a clue what goes into this profession. True, some teachers in much better communities have it pretty good and they will tell you they are perfectly content with their pay and time off; however, every teacher does not have that wonderful classroom, full of kids that learn and parents that support. Instead, they get the bottom of the barrel so to speak and it's darn hard, the frustration level is much higher, and they feel like they are fighting a losing battle some days, but they push on. They could find another job paying better, but most teachers that stick with it truly care for the kids and want to try to get that lightbulb to go off, somehow.
LOL! Blake should have gone a long time ago.
nm
It should be on there a long time. It takes
nm
Six years is a long time; I'd probably go with 100.00
gift certificate to a nice restaurant or a spa/massage.
First traditional 4th in a long time

My son is 20 now so we haven't gone and watched fireworks or anything like that in a while. But a couple of months ago, one of my half-brothers got in touch with me (we had lost touch for about 5 years). Turns out he lives less than a hundred miles from me, he is now married and has three children (ages 7, 5 and 2). He has a house on 10 acres way out in the country. So we are going there for a good old-fashioned barbecue (just hot dogs and hamburgers, with guests bringing some of the trimmings - my recipe below). And since it's not within city limits, we get to pop firecrackers! Hooray!


I am taking fruit with dip. And before you start groaning about "healthy" dishes - let me tell you how I make the dip. Take two containers of smooth cream cheese with pineapple and mix it with an 8 oz container of Cool Whip. Chill, then let it set at room temperature for 30 minutes to an hour to soften it before serving. Believe me, it is absolutely addicting!!


Old, old story - been around a long time -
.
I've had it a long time

I've had IBS since I was little and I'm now 30.  I have many different symptoms including diarrhea, gas, bloating, heartburn, and upper and lower abdominal pain.  I used to have constipation alternating with diarrhea, but I haven't had a problem with constipation in a few years.  Anyway, stress is the major triggering factor for me and I also have panic attacks/anxiety so it's a vicious cycle.  When I get anxious I get an IBS attack and when I get an IBS attack, I panic.  So, my doc placed me on Bentyl for the IBS and I take something for the anxiety as well.  Hope you find what works for you.  It's not fun living with IBS but at least there are ways to manage it and make life more peaceful.


a long time ago I had a cat who pulled out fur
clear down to leaving an oozing sore that had to be surgically sewn up - vet then said it was an allergy. 
I would have divorced a long time ago....sm
when my husband had a drug problem. I didn't because my son told me he would not come with me but that he would choose to stay with his dad. He was around 7 years old at the time. I couldn't leave my son. So I didn't leave. He is so close to his daddy. He would pick his dad drugs and all over me any day of the week and that hurt me very bad because I have always been a good mom. So I stayed. I guess God helped me though because my husband quit using drugs miraculously later and we are doing pretty good now.
I think there's been specultation for a long time, but
who cares! Gay or not I've been a fan forever and always will be. I could care less.

I agree with Daiseymae, let them grieve in peace. I cannot even imagine what they are going through.
It took a long time and was a neuro that dxd her sm

It also took a couple of months to find a surgeon who had heard of it and was willing to do the surgery. As far as being picked up on x-ray, I don't think it was. She had gone to orthopedists, GYN (thinking endometriosis), and I don't know who else before being seen by this neurologist, and it wasn't even a neurologic problem. He just happened to have known about it and made the diagnosis based on clinical observation. First they put her on strict bedrest for 2 weeks to see if it helped, and while it did some good, it was not enough. That is when they went forward with the surgery. The surgery was done outpatient, and she had a resting period of a few days but felt immediate results. There are risks with the surgery as there are with any surgery that have to be weighed also. I don't know if this is how yours is, but they explained the pain as like having cracked ribs constantly. I hope you are able to get a diagnosis quickly, whatever it ends up being. Not knowing can be awful.


I did do that a long time ago for GI upset.
She liked it and I can't remember now what her poops were like so I guess they were probably more normal as I didn't notice it.

I'll try it again, I think. Thanks.
He did not add that part, it has been going around a long time (sm)
I got an email recently that was worded exactly like this. And have a sense of humor, Mr.Tech Support does, sheez louise!
It has been a long time since I had school age children--sm
but I just want to make a comment here that so far nobody else has suggested. Two of my children had been born with cleft palates and thus had many surgeries and speech difficulties. I had so many discussions with the school system, it still boggles my mind some 20 years later, but I did learn one thing during this time. Some school systems have special education classes that are funded from outside sources. In order to maintain those classes and the *funding*, they had to have a certain quota of children enrolled in them. If they were not going to meet their quota for any given school semester/year, the *teachers* would start to *recruit* somewhat borderline children, i.e. the ones that were slightly *slower* than the *norm*. Those were the children that they told the parents they did not have the *resources* to spend extra time with, etc. basically *forcing* them into the special education classes, and hence meeting their quotas, and retaining their funding. My children had very high IQs, but only had speech problems until all of their surgeries were done to correct their problems. Their teachers also attempted to keep my children in special education classes and even special schools, when they were just as *normal* as any other child. I can't tell you how difficult it is to argue with a *multidisciplinary team* to keep a child out of special education classes when you know in your heart it is not necessary, and all they want is their *funding*. I have very little use for the school systems of today and feel that all children would be better off being taught at home. If social interaction is the only draw back, children really do get enough of that through their neighborhoods, family, and friends. This is just my opinion and experiences, so I don't want to start any arguments here. Just keep in mind about the *funding* as they will never tell you this straight out. good luck to you.
Anyone with an LCD monitor that can tell me how long they last when used for working all the time.

Mine seems to be having problems after about 2 years but used hard every day.


2 years is a long time to be doing what you're doing.
nm
Please talk! Been divorced for a long time
now and I think ignoring things and lack of communication led him to other women and the rest of the story is not important.  So many people I have talked to feel that just letting things go without talking let to terminal demise of their marriage.  Do something before it escalates.  This may have been a perfect opportunity to begin dialog.
Been cooking hams for a long time
Never took the rind off prior to it being almost cooked, then say for the last 35 minutes or so would take the rind off with a knife and fork, never tried removing prior to baking. I scored the ham (cut in zig-zag effect), stuck whole cloves in and put brown sugar on top of that (oh, remove the cloves prior to eating- my son told me years later he ate the cloves, thought he was supposed to.)
I have wanted a bengal for a long time
I want the snow leopard - pricey!
I had a patient's name a long time ago, Ima Piggee..nm
nm
I saw a demo of the software on TV long time ago. sm
there was a slate-like appendage that you could draw on with a pencil-like tool. and then the software did remarkable things, but this was some time ago.

goodle it, research. you're bound to find a site with a demo.


They've been radical for a long time!...
nm
e.r. jumped the shark a long time ago.
I was a HUGE fan for years and years. My eyebrows went up when Romano was killed by the helicopter. I thought they went into the deep water at that point. But about 3 years ago I was sure that they had jumped the shark, and I stopped watching. I watched a few of the last episodes on hulu.com last week and decided to watch the finale last night, but it was a snooze to me. It's a shame when good shows stay on the air too long.
my father was "written out" of the will a long time sm
ago due to issues between him and grandmother. My sister and I are the only grandchildren and the nephew and great-nephew are the only heirs. My grandmother had a will but I am afraid the nephew and attorney (who is the power of attorney) conspired to get her to change her will towards the end of things.
Married long time ago in church. SM
They don't care if you convert. You just have to sign paper stating the children will be brought up Catholic.

The bride and groom must also attend classes before the wedding.

I never heard of any of the other things mentioned. That must be some conservative church.
No, I've watched this gal for a long time on the boards &
t
I just hugged my Golden for an extra long time

I'm so sad for this poor dog.  I know it is at Rainbow Bridge and at peace but what a horrible way for it to die, and it sounds as if it's life wasn't too hot either.    I hope it's owners get the book thrown at them.


To poster below, I have seen on TV for heatstroke they put alcohol on the pads/paws which supposedly helps cool them, also cold water on the body, etc.  (I watch Emergenc Vets on TV sometimes - love those docs).


Was having a great time (Beware, long rambling:-)

while I was scooping the back so thought I'd try to get a couple of pics for DH, who is gone for the next 10 days for work.  He's a labradoodle that we got last summer at 4 months old and before anyone jumps in here and says they're overpriced mutts (which they are ) we got him from a shelter in another city.  All of the dogs I have had have been from shelters and would never pay hundreds or thousands when there are so many dogs that need homes.  We saw a brown one last summer that DH fell in love with, so I did some searching and this shelter had several.  The others had been picked up as strays, a couple of older dogs and several puppies, which I guess all but a couple died from parvo.  Jake was turned in by a family who thought he was too energetic for their 2-year-old.  He had kennel cough, we discovered, when we got him home and was sick for a few weeks, but not too bad a case, had some snotty nose and coughing, was really worried about pneumonia, but the vet said to go ahead and give him the vaccine and sometimes that helps them get over it a little easier.  He's got a nice combination of lab and poodle coat, needs to be raked once a week or so, but he doesn't shed.  He's a little pill for sure but I think is going to be a great dog with a little more work.  He's still pretty ~boisterous~ you might say on walks.  I'm a Dog Whisperer fan, just love that show and Cesar Millan, so we ordered the collar that he uses on that show, and it really is making a huge difference.  Also, I was really impressed when we got it.  How many things do you find these days that are made in the US?  His packaging on the collar had ~~we proudly support our country, made in the USA~~!!  Even more of a fan now!


I have been checking out boxer rescues and if we can afford a home of our own, hopefully next year sometime, I'd like to get a pal for him.  I'm actually a big boxer fan from way back, have a pic mom took of me as a baby in diapers sitting in the middle of a litter of boxer puppies with them crawling all over me!  a wonder any of us grew up, huh , with all the things we came in contact with like that, she'd probalby get hauled away for child abuse these days.  Dad found the mamma boxer wandering the country roads one hot summer day when he was hail adjusting.  She was struggling, pregnant, really hot and thirsty, so he brought her home, no one ever claimed her, so Duchess became a part of our family.  I had a boxer some years ago that I adopted from a puppy mill raid, where I helped take care of some of the dogs that were rescued, 200 and some of all varieties and ages, mostly all sick, filthy, malnourished, etc. in the the middle of January, below zero, snow, and a lot of them kept outside with no shelter, was a horrible mess, but people in that town really stepped up to the plate, donated all kinds of food, leashes, collars, bedding, vets donated their services, and all but a few of the dogs (too sick and had to be put down) were adopted.  Duke was a very sick pup at first and didn't know if he'd make it, but he was a wonderful dog with my kids when they were young!


Anyway, just sitting here browsing the board and rambling on...By the way Hayseed, I visited your website the other day because I wanted to see your web cam (really cool!) and saw you had an RIP pic for Arf, sorry for your loss.  I remember you said awhile back you thought it wouldn't be long but must have missed when he passed and crossed the bridge.


Cool. So glad for them. Long time coming(nm)
x
What's funny is that for a long time I did not realize it was all abuse (sm)
I knew the physical part was abuse. Other than that I thought he was a jerk, quirky ideas about things, a hard-nose, hard-headed, rude...but I never realized it was all abuse until I finally started reading up on it. Apparently in these situations we start to accept things little by little as being normal. Like slowly boiling before you realize you're done.
Gays march for their rights to be involved with their long-time partners
health care should a drastic decision be made. It is usually a family member...even though we are the ones who take care of our partners when they are sick or dying. We fight for the right not to be thrown out of a shared house by the partner's parents. We want to honor our partner's wishes when they die as we are the ones who have spent years with them - not the family. These are just a few examples.

As far as your comment that we influence young people - that is absurd. All we want is to live our life and as pxmt said, be able to walk down the street without abusive comments, being assaulted, ridiculed, etc.

The school system is not segregating gay children - they are making it "gay friendly and teaching tolerance". Suicide is very high in gay children because of the parents who teach their children that it is evil and it is okay to bash a gay child. These schools are just trying to save the lives of young children.

As far as your comment that Christian's homes and churches are burned, sorry but I cannot recall one incident that I have read or saw on the news. Temples yes. As far as being assaulted for your beliefs, could it be because you stand in front of abortion clinics and gun down the doctors and nurses that come out or go into the clinic? Could it be that you bully the 15 and 16-year-olds who have been raped and want an abortion?

Sorry to say this, at least we (gays) are not violent and just want to be left alone.
Nausea is a horrible thing to experience! 3 weeks is a long time to feel this way....
Anesthesia can take a little while to wear off, each person is different in the way that it affects them initially and afterward, however 3 weeks is quite a long time to feel this way. The nausea could be caused by a series of things...general side effect of medication/allergic reaction, maybe even an underlying infection of some sort. I would not hesitate to contact the primary care physician, the surgeon, or any physician on call. It would be in the best interest of your mother to seek medical attention as quickly as possible. Also, consider any medications that she is taking for pain or even just her regular meds- sometimes this type of reaction can be caused by a combination of medications. Just a thought.
I hope that she gets feeling better really soon. Nausea is horrible, especially when you have it 9 months through an entire pregnancy! :)
Please keep us posted!
If you're asking and the love is long gone, it's time. Make copies of all important papers,
s
Finances . . .
Why? Husband has been laid off since last October, works for father, doesn't want to quit, can't really work anywhere else (not licensed yet). My wages went down when I was whisked out the door by my previous hospital job (stupid EMR/VR). Oh yeah . . . and house is worth about $100,000 less than what we owe :(

I have a lot more that I could add, but since we have to pick just one, I guess I will go with finances. Ain't this economy just a blast? (sarcastic)

GabbyChick . . . I completely understand where you are coming from about having a dream career. It especially sucks when you have put time and effort into what once used to be very comparible to a dream job.
Here's how I handle finances ...
I am doing well when I see others are not but it takes some priorities and discipline.

I have a budget set. I follow it religiously. It took time to develop it. It includes expenses for maintaining the car and home, clothes, gifts, haircuts, emergency saving, long-term saving. If I have a fluctuation in income where I have excess left over - it goes to savings, not in my spending fist.

I have everything I can set up on electronic banking. It helps keep you on track if you cringe at the thought of being overdrawn and messed up on an electronic withdrawal problem!

Income is direct deposited into 3 accounts: Household checking, personal checking and savings. Household checking is where all expenses are paid out of. Savings, self explanatory. Personal checking is the allowance I have for myself from each paycheck. It is my personal spending.

Once the bills are paid, each payperiod I have a set amount I withdraw in cash from household checking. This is for gas/groceries. That is it. When we run out of cash for gas/groceries, we run out.

Don't carry credit/debit cards or checks with you.

Single most important staep you can take: Live below your means. Whatever your income is, subtract 10% for your savings and then live on the rest. No exceptions. No matter what changes you have to make, if you do not do take this one most important step, you will never have any savings and never get ahead.


My husband is oblivious to our finances

Sometimes that's a good thing and sometimes not.  It sounds like maybe your husband is too proud to tell his family that he can't afford these things.  I've had my niece/nephew over for the weekend and it adds up quick.  I would suggest talking to the "leader" of his family, the person who hosts the get-togethers, and let them know that you do the finances and you just don't have it this year.  It doesn't need to be said in front of everyone or even in front of your husband.  I would certainly let your husband know that you are going to say something beforehand, but he doesn't need to be present at the time it's said. 


I'm not sure how you do Christmas/birthdays in your family, but in our family, we exchange names for Christmas so we don't have to buy everyone but everyone has something to open.  For birthdays, we take the time to call and wish that person a happy birthday.  We don't buy for the children unless they are having a party and we've been invited to it.  My brother lives about 2 hours away, so we don't always make it to each other's parties for the kids.  Unless his family is loaded, I'm sure they'll understand.


As for the glasses, I just took my son for new glasses yesterday.  The eye doctor said he needs a new prescription, but I asked if just the lenses could be replaced and the frames reused.  He said absolutely.  Our insurance covers new frames, lenses and the exam, but my son has a tendency to break things at the most inopportune time.  We just bought him these glasses in June because he broke them and according to the insurance, it wasn't time yet for new ones.  Now that he is eligible for everything new, we asked for just the lenses.  If he breaks his frames later in the year, we can just get new frames (covered by insurance) and pop the lenses in.  The only problem there would be is they discontinue his frames because the new lenses probably wouldn't fit a different frame.  So, something to consider here is, if your stepchild needs a new prescription and already has glasses, then I would check with your lawyer to see if you can just buy new lenses for the current frames.  The frames are what normally cost the most anyway.


Not the last couple sharing finances
I can't imagine having separate money from my husband. We're married and we share everything equally including bills.
The reasoning is that those who are not in control of their own finances (sm)
i.e., bad credit, are more statistically more likely to be tempted to steal.