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In reading my post over, I just realized...

Posted By: nightsky on 2009-05-17
In Reply to: Just need to vent a bit...and maybe get an outside opinion? - nightsky

She probably didn't mean anything by it, but if it was meant to be rude, why should I even waste my time on the negativity? I have more important things to spend my time on :) I guess I just posted to help me feel better at the time because I was a little upset as I was surprised and didn't really understand it. Anyway, it isn't really worth my time and shouldn't really matter, and negative people really aren't worth time and energy I don't have to spend on them. Time to go back to work :) Goodnight....


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Thanks, after reading your post...sm
I decided I am going to call and speak with the manager first. Yes, I was supposed to go back to the same girl today but I changed my mind. I am going to explain the situation to the manager and ask if I can come in another day when this hairdresser is not there for a fix by someone else.
After reading your post and all of the other
posters' comments, I would give you the following advice...

Tell your friend 'A' that HE is alwlays welcome into your house, but SHE is not.

If 'A' invites you and your husband into a restaurant and SHE will be present, decline. You BOTH have to decline, this counts also for your husband.
If 'A' is alone, you both can accept the invitation.
Are you reading what you post?
You're complaining about someone else's grammatical mistakes and then when someone points yours out to you, you become defensive.  I'd worry more about getting kicked out the meeting for your rudeness than getting banned from an anonymous board.  Imagine how that poor woman must have felt being corrected by you, most likely in front of others.  No matter how "nicely" you may have worded it, it was rude, and even though she didn't seem to notice your rudeness, I'm sure others did.  You seriously said "balls" in a meeting to her?  What were you thinking?
Here is what comes to my mind after reading your post.
Are you sure you are not favoring one child over another and he senses this or is imaging it - that would be difficult to articulate for a child. Being a first born, he may have been center of attention for a while and then had to share it to his siblings - always hard on a child. If he does not have a disorder that is chemically induced, I would consider that as tantrums are an attempt for attention. Communication is the answer. I'd suggest one on one events with this child alone on a regular basis. You will gain his trust so that he can express what is making him so frustrated. I feel for you. I watch the nanny shows and am always amazed at how difficult life is in a house when the family is unable to live in harmony due to out of control children. You'll have to not stop until to find a solution, for everyone's sake. Good luck to you, mom.
A couple of you are NOT reading my post

So the end to this request for advice.


I DID NOT SAY I HAD THE DEGREES.  Obviously, you are not a good MT or anything else, as you don't read/pay attention.  BYE, got my answer.  Have a great life!


A couple of you are NOT reading my post

So the end to this request for advice.


I DID NOT SAY I HAD THE DEGREES.  Obviously, you are not a good MT or anything else, as you don't read/pay attention.  BYE, got my answer.  Have a great life!


A couple of you are NOT reading my post

So the end to this request for advice.


I DID NOT SAY I HAD THE DEGREES.  Obviously, you are not a good MT or anything else, as you don't read/pay attention.  BYE, got my answer.  Have a great life!


A couple of you are NOT reading my post

So the end to this request for advice.


I DID NOT SAY I HAD THE DEGREES.  Obviously, you are not a good MT or anything else, as you don't read/pay attention.  BYE, got my answer.  Have a great life!


A couple of you are NOT reading my post

So the end to this request for advice.


I DID NOT SAY I HAD THE DEGREES.  Obviously, you are not a good MT or anything else, as you don't read/pay attention.  BYE, got my answer.  Have a great life!


A couple of you are NOT reading my post

So the end to this request for advice.


I DID NOT SAY I HAD THE DEGREES.  Obviously, you are not a good MT or anything else, as you don't read/pay attention.  BYE, got my answer.  Have a great life!


A couple of you are NOT reading my post

So the end to this request for advice.


I DID NOT SAY I HAD THE DEGREES.  Obviously, you are not a good MT or anything else, as you don't read/pay attention.  BYE, got my answer.  Have a great life!


I do not live in Texas but after reading your post, let me say
you do NOT have to have sex in order to get cervical cancer. I personally do not feel this is a message for kids to have sex. I have a daughter who is older, out on her own and she would have to make her own decision regarding this. If when she was growing up IF she had come to me and said she wanted birth control, knowing this was probably what was going to happen, i would have taken her to get this. I would much rather have a child on birth control that have a bunch of kids brought home to me to have to support and care for. I had my children and raised them, didn’t need any more. You can talk to children regarding this but eventually most will make up their own minds as to what they want to do, not their parents.
Oops, sorry, I dozed off as I was reading your post.
sd
catching up on reading the board and had to post

In response to the hub-bub about the illegal residents of our country and their lack of interest in learning to speak English - Just a few days ago, my kids got off the school bus and came running in the door in a panic.  One picks up the phone and starts dialing like crazy while the other proceeds to tell me what was going on.


A girl who lives up the road has severe asthma.  While she was on the bus, she started having an asthma attack and her inhaler was empty.  The kids were all trying to tell the bus driver that there was a problem and that the girl needed help. 


Turns out they had a substitute bus driver that day.  This guy speaks very little English and was yelling at the kids over and over again, "Must Go.  Must Go," and continued with his route, completely ignoring the fact that there was an obvious medical emergency on board his bus.


So my kids could not reach the girls parents by phone (busy) and since she still had a long, uphill walk after her bus stop, it was 7 degrees out (not helpful for an asthma attack,) and was in distress when my kids got off the bus,  we hopped in the car and went to get her to take her home. 


By the time we got to her, she was white as a ghost, purple lips, and about ready to pass out.  Her brother was practically dragging her.  Got her in the car and took her to her house where her dad met us. 


Makes me wonder how can a school employee NOT speak or at least understand English well enough to be able to handle situations like this?  What if she had lost consciousness on the bus or worse.  Sounds to me like he would have continued on with his route and maybe done something about it after he got back to the bus garage? 


You are reading a post, no emotion, no inflection,
x
Marie - I was ROFL reading your post
Sorry I know its not funny especially for you. That is totally disgusting. They sound like the nieghbors we had in Reno, but they didn't have pets - it was their stinking food and stuff they left all over. Why do people live like such nasty ho's. Well we may not have the dog poo but they did do something with their back yard and fertilizer and it really stinks and now we are infested with flies here. I won't call Animal control because they really are not cruel to their dog, they just let it bark all the time then it goes inside once it gets dark out. They do play with their dog too (its constantly getting loose and they are running up and down the street yelling for it - dog comes back). None of our neighbors have their dogs tied up, they just let them roam free. I like the solution that Jim Carey did in a movie called Me, Myself and Irene when he kept telling his neighbor to stop letting the dog poo on his lawn. He went over to his neighbors lawn and took a dump on it in broad daylight while the neighbor watched. I thought that was hysterical. Well sounds like you needed to vent more than I did. I'll count myself lucky reading about you. Four years probably seems like forever to you too. Wish you best.
After reading your most recent post I understand where you are coming from better (sm)
You are in a very difficult position...I feel bad for you and both of the children. It is tough to say what would be better. Being taken from your parents would be very traumatic for children as well. There must be some sort of child care they can find that they can afford.
I started reading your post and was thinking Louisana
before you ever got to mention your state. You know the food there is different than our other southern states, such as the gumbo and such. I always called Cokes "cold drinks." I have dinner and my father always tried to correct me to supper but I have dinner at my home even though in the deep south. I do not know the donuts you speak of. My daughter says she can hardly pass KK when the hot light is on. I think in Louisana so much is Cajun cooking and here in Georgia very little of that goes on. I have never tasted but might if I make it over there.
Reading your post it is clear the love you gave this wonderful animal SM

thoughout her life. You were together for many years and you gave her a wonderful life. Please try to always remember that.   A woman who cleaned for my mom cleaned my apartment once and when I showed her a dog collar that I have that my darling Westie wore I broke down. This woman knew my Westie and loved her, too. I cried and said I had some feelings of guilt that I was dealing with. This wonderful woman said something to me that might help you now. She said


"Just think of the life you gave her.  Now think of the life she might have had if she had fallen into the hands of someone who did not love her."  That really helped me a lot. I hope in time it will help you, too. God Bless you.


 


Realized something else
I called those phone sex numbers again and went through the menu. They are actually datelines where you record your own little greeting and then chat with someone in your area. Just something else to make it even worse.
I just realized that!
Just yesterday I typed up a report in which the patient refused to be weighed! I thought, Jeez, why have I been obediently getting on the scale every time they tell me! Next time they say "You can get on the scale", I'll say, "No, thank you."

Ha! I feel so empowered!

Yup! I have finally realized it! SM
It's funny because she will always call or instant message my husband or I whenever she needs something! Just a few weeks ago, out of the blue she called and asked if my husband could take her to Home Depot to get some materials because they wouldn't fit in her car and we have a big mini van with a roof rack. I told him not to do it because she is just using us! It's so annoying!

The same thing happened to us when we got our new plasma TV last year! She came over and saw it and said, "Oh I heard those things don't last too long." She always has some sort of rude comment whenever she is jealous! I'm so done with her!

Also, she wanted me to try to get her son's girlfriend a job in transcription. She thought she could do it just because she could "type really fast." I told her that there was no way she would be able to do it if she doesn't have the proper training to learn all of the medical terminology, drug names, etc. Her response was, "Oh, she doesn't need that. She can type as fast as you!" I guess she really is just a jealous, disrespectful person! The sad thing is, she is much older than me! I'm 26 and she is in her 40s! Amazing!
I recently realized
that I cannot compare my family to my husbands. It's hard when you grow up with such different values focusing on basic things like the importance of family and relationships.

MIL was recently in the hospital with heart concerns and they just dropped her off and went home. This is the 3rd time her husband has done this. Atleast this time he called the children. It is beyond me why one of her 3 boys (or their spouses) did not make the 15 minute drive to go sit with her. I would have but I was working and figure if out of all those people no one else could make the effort, why should I turn my life upside-down to do it. I can't imagine anyone in my family doing that, even if it was something routine or scheduled. My sister is the one who told me to let it go.
went out shopping before I realized
I had two different shoes on - one tan, one black. What to do?
went out shopping before I realized
I had two different shoes on - one tan, one black. What to do? But my friend has a worse one. After going to the ladies room her skirt got stuck up into her panty hose so everything was showing in the back. She was out on a street when a guy in a pickup truck alerted her to the mishap.
went out shopping before I realized
I had two different shoes on - one tan, one black. What to do? But my friend has a worse one. After going to the ladies room her skirt got stuck up into her panty hose so everything was showing in the back. She was out on a street when a guy in a pickup truck alerted her to the mishap.
Because I realized it was a bad decision to move here (sm)
I had just had a C-section, we lived in an apartment. He insisted that he do the house hunting. I was at home with my newborn and my c-section recovery. He fell in love with this house and told me all that we were going to do with it. I was worried the road might be too busy but he assured me it was not. I agreed. Then when I realized that I had to have room darkening shades on the windows at night to keep out the car lights and run a fan all night to drown out car noises, and that he wasn't going to fix the termite-eaten pantry or the sagging floor, yeah, I wanted to move. If you call that selfish then you come live here.
I thought of that initially too, but then I realized just

how diabolical we women can be.  Maybe she wrote the thank you note because she wanted to plant the seed, to shake it a up a bit because she's hoping the guy will leave the wife for her.  She can then always feign innocent to the guy when she gets upset at her for sending the thank you note.  "Oh, I just assumed your wife knew about the tip because you wrote a check, so I was trying to cover for you."


My ex's mistress called my home phone to thank me for letting him help her move with his truck.  She was a friend of the wife of one of his friends.  My ex's explanation was "oh, my buddy just talked me into to helping him help a 'friend' move.  I had no idea it was a woman.  I just got roped into it."  Whatever!  She was leaving her husband and he helped her move out!  Little did the dumb broad know what I had written a suspicious phone number down off my ex's cell phone and when she called my home phone number, that number popped up.  She was too stupid to use a different phone or call anonymously!  I knew I had him caught. 


One other thing I would do, is talk to her ex-husband.  Find out why they divorced.  Lucky for me my ex's dumb broad had an angry estranged husband who was looking for revenge.  He was more than happy to fill me in on everything he knew that had been going on. 


It may be that your husband has actually physically betrayed you yet and I hope that's the case for you.  But still you need to address his deceit and inappropriate behavior.


I just realized that they are all lined up in order of their ages!
Max is the oldest (the one on the far left), and he will be 6 on Christmas day. Bailey (middle) just turned 4 this past summer, and scooter (end) just turned 2 this summer.
Sorry again - I just realized you were replying to a message from me, not "me"
Boy, this can get confusing. I thought you were replying to my message. Sorry for the confusion.
When I realized while dating what lousy taste he had, I started buying my own gifts. Been doing it
s
If I'm reading right
then it makes perfect sense to me. He does not, no how, no way, no matter what happens, want anymore children. She "would not mind" having more children, but is willing to not have more children because of his wishes. However, should something happen, God forbid, to her husband or their marriage, she potentially would like to have more children.

Not sure why she wants him to have a vasectomy, but if I did read it right, it is his best insurance policy (short of abstinance) to ensure he does not get what he does not want. However, you are correct that there are other ways to avoid pregnancy, but sounds like the OP just wants her husband to be happy (by not getting what he does not want).

OP, I do agree with the posting that suggested you should not have scheduled this for him while he is of the mind set of not wanting to have it done. My husband just did have it done (our youngest child is 10 years old). After our youngest child was born, without my suggesting it, hubby had said that he would have it done because he felt that it was the right/fair thing to do. After all, I had gone through the two pregnancies/childbirths/breastfeeding, etc. While I appreciated the sentiment, he did not follow through with it until he HAD to. He had a varicocele that was causing referred pain up under his arm, which prompted him to see the family doc, who did not diagnose the varicocele, but after attempting to clear an "infection" (a "knot" in his testicle) with a couple of rounds of antibiotics, eventually he referred to a urologist.

I have not been able to take hormonals for years due to headaches and other problems associated with them, and had had an IUD placed, but had to have it removed the following day, so we had been using condoms for most of the 10-year time period (and even THAT did not prompt him to go ahead and have it done, after it was his idea to do it -- men can be such babies . . . LOL).

Because of the varicocele, he had to be put under and the surgery was a little more extensive than the normal, in-office procedure, and hubby has come through just fine. Yes, there is pain involved, but I imagine there was a little bit of pain involved with birthing your babies. I think he should "be a man" and just do it.
you might be reading too much into this

I have two daughters currently undergoing orthodontia treatment and their docs (brothers) either call us that night to see how they are feeling after their treatment or send a personal note.  Just very friendly, caring orthodontists.  They also have an office full of pretty young ladies and are both married with a bunch of kids and lovely wives.  They are just very nice guys.


Could be that your orthodontist is just trying to be a nice guy.   Don't embarrass yourself by reading too much into what could be an innocent effort to make your treatment time more enjoyable. 


Currently reading

"Cross" by James Patterson, next on my stack of 10 new books is "I Heard That song before by Mary Higgins Clark.  I'm an avid reader - can you tell??


 


Only just reading this, so very sorry.
I lost my little man kitty Dante, it has been almost 2 years, I've been thinking about him after reading all the supportive messages above. I was just telling my daughter yesterday that I think it's time to go to the Shelter and find a new little kitty to love. The value of their company cannot be measured. God Bless, take comfort in all the good days you had together. I'll say a little prayer that your heart does not hurt too much or for too long.

Wise
Reading this over and I think
your aunt does not have the ability to change a will. That is not what an executor does, that is not the position to change what is in a will. If you and your brother get anything at all, I think you should be glad because you were only taking the place of your father, his own child, as your father is demented. I went thru a similar thing, my father died and I had a deceased brother. The insurance company was supposed to divide insurance between the children of my deceased brother and me as they were taking the place of my brother. After a year's time they could not find them and they sent me the balance of 1/2 of the insurance fund. I am thinking perhaps with no changes made prior to the demise of your grandfather, that money perhaps might go to your father and hence like you do not want it to go, to the state. That would not be good for any of his entitled heirs but you might have an uphill battle with lawyers, the courts, etc. in this case. You can break a will and if lots there to be gotten, then probably can take this course. The aunt should already have hers coming, is that not right so I doubt with her telling the power of attorney to get a lawyer she is trying for more, only she does not have the authority to just break herself.
I don't know... From what I'm reading on other
sites, people are so tired of Adam's monotonous exact screams in every single song that the Danny voters will probably swing to Kris, so it could be up for grabs. AI has a message board too.
Ladies, please after reading your
posts you are sounding like a bunch of feuding school aged girls. What in the world is your problem? Retract your claws and be friends again, ok?
I did a lot of reading before Thanksgiving
when we made one - it was rather small - just for the 2 of us - and it turned out perfect. Husband likes very rare and we knew we would have a few slices left over which we would then microwave so wanted them rare also. The best advice I can give is to buy a good thermometer and take out before it reaches the temp you want for rare, medium or whatever - as it does continue to cook for a few minutes outside the oven - which surprised this old cook!!  It actually rose 5-10 degrees (cannot recall right now) and that can make a huge difference in a small prime rib - I was shocked! :))
After reading the below posts sm
I have to laugh. I have HP and have no trouble at all. It is the same thing with kitchen appliances. Have mostly GE and am not happy but many surveys say GE is one of the best.
OK-what is your fav book or what are you reading now
My very favorite book is Outlander by Diana Galbadon and I am current re-reading the second book in the Outlander series, Dragonfly in Amber. I would like to reread all 6 of them this summer, but Harry Potter is also coming out, so we'll see.  They are all huge books.
I loved reading this. sm
I also read it on the Comedy board and shared it with my Bible School class. Will share wtih my adult Sunday School also.
I have really enjoyed reading all of these.
Thank you for all your help.
I have been reading all these posts sm
and debating on what to say. Bear with me, this could be long. My mother's mother lives in California and has all my life. I live in Virginia. I havew seen my grandmother exactly 5 times and I am now 40. My mother died unexpectedly 3 years ago (she lived here and was extremely close with all her grandchildren). I knew that my mother and grandmother did not have a close relationship but they did love each other. The night before the funeral my father and I had such a long wonderful talk. He told me then that he never ever heard my grandmother say anything positive, not even anything nice to my mother. He wasn't trying to critize my GM but was just stating the facts. Two years ago my parents (dad and stepmother) decided to take each grandchild (4) on a separate vacation. My daughter really wanted to go to CA. Not necessarily to see her great-grandmother but wanted to include that in the trip. My parents asked me to go along. We flew to San Francisco and drove to her home about 3 hours away. Now keep in mind, my GM loves my father and thinks he put the moon and sun in the sky. We were only going to stay in her town over night simply becuase the woman is not enjoyable to be around. She has a very tiny home so we decided to stay in a hotel. My GM asked me if my daughter and I would like to stay with her. I did not want to but my stepmother really thought I should. We arrived and after spending some time at her house trying to show her pictures of the other grandchildren (she really wasn't very interested) we took her to lunch. I tried to talk to her about the likes of my other child as well as my nieces and what there life was like. She just kept interuppting and changing the subject. Mostly about my brother or to talk to my father. As we were leaving the restaurant my SM pulled me aside and said that we should definitely stay at the hotel. My GM has no other family except my brother and I. I still call her every week but the conversations are always the same. No interest in my life. My son's 17th b-day is tomorrow and he got a card from her yesterday. It was pink and covered in flowers. This is not a woman who I want to spend time with and never have for multiple reasons. I could write a book. Please don't "make" your children go. There are obvious reasons in their minds and you should respect that.
After reading some of your posts,

it sounds like maybe he just wants to stay married so he can keep you under his thumb.  I'm sure it's better for him financially if you stay together and he has someone to do the household chores as well.  As for asking for sex via email, that is creepy.  But, I would still wonder whether he is getting somewhere else.  I think men would still continue to ask, just on the off-chance that you actually would say yes, but get it somewhere else, too.  I'd be afraid of what he could bring home.  As for the kids, I agree with the other posters.  The kids will pick up on this, but sadly enough, they will grow up believing it's a normal relationship when it's not, thus the generation-after-generation epic of divorce.  That's just my opinion, though, and I'm certainly not an expert.


Now, back to you, I'm sorry that you're not getting any with someone who loves and respects you.  So often, it is just assumed that the woman doesn't need/desire intimacy, when in all honesty women crave that intimacy even more than men.  It's not necessarily the physical aspect of the intimacy that women crave, but rather the emotional.  The fact that he asks for it so bluntly via email on a daily basis is his way of degrading you.  Don't let it go on any longer.  I would be headed straight to the divorce lawyer's office.  Many women have been through divorce and made it through okay.  You're children will support you once they see how much happier you are without him.  Good luck to you. 


Thanks everyone for sharing - still reading, lol. sm
She has had her "permit" and has been driving with me (and siblings, lol) for a year now. I have let her drive as much as possible because I too feel like one poster said about the more experience the more comfortable and responsible. My sister got killed in a car wreck at 21 so my DD is very aware of how panicky I am about letting her drive and myself letting go more than anything I think. She has been an excellent driver (while I am in the car that is). We do live in a little country town so she would not be allowed to drive into the big city with major traffic for a long while by herself. She has driven there 2-3 times with me and on her first trip I allowed her to drive to town, someone rear-ended us!! I laugh now though because she didn't know what to do at all. We were at a stop (red light), the lady hit us about the same time the light turned green, and DD proceeded to go with the greenlight! I was like hmm, what are you doing? She didn't realize we had been hit as she was proceeding to go when we got hit. It's funny after the fact because no one was hurt, just minor fender bender, but at least it was a learning experience for her and was not her fault.

My SIL's mother owns a Mexican restaurant close to us and will work around her schedule to allow her to work when she can so she does have the capacity of getting a job if she can ever have time to work. She has helped there temporarily on holidays a few times already. I think she will have some time this summer though as cheer practice is usually over at noon and she will just have to save up to pay her bills.

I kind of feel I should cover her with how hard she is working at school and activities, but don't want to "spoil" my child and not make her appreciate it and not learn responsibility so I want to make her be responsible for something. Of course, her 16-yo friend got a brand new, off the show room floor Mazda RX7. That is parental ignorance in my opinion and aint happening for my kids even if I could afford it. I can tell you one night they didn't get home from a game until 11:30 p.m. on a school night and I was livid. She was up until 1 a.m. studying for her semester exam the next day!! She is very dedicated, but that is ridiculous. Our local community college gives the entire top 10 a full paid scholarship so that is why she is encouraged to make the top 10 and pushing really hard towards this goal. She is already taking some college classes at school (combo classes) including A&P as she wants to be ultrasound tech and that is a tough class.

I have checked into ins, which is out the roof, but they also deduct points based on good grades, etc. so I want to at least make her partially pay for this so she will be encouraged not to speed, keep the grades up, etc. and realize it will all save her money by doing so.

Good tip though to let her drive home and to school. That is one thing we don't do as it is so routine she doesn't ask then and I don't think about it. You are definitely right, that parking lot is crazy and makes me never want to let my son drive when I see those teenage boys spinning out in the parking lot. I'll start letting her do that. Thanks again everyone!!
This happens with my sunglasses as well as reading
and I know what you are talking about. I think the haziness comes from either touching your face with the lens part or maybe your breath. I usually just take mine off and then put back on. Has nothing to do with the price you paid.
Summer reading

I'm currently reading a great book on Einstein.  It was published in 2007, after all of his papers finally became public.  Author is Walter Isaacson, and it's called:  EINSTEIN - HIS LIFE AND UNIVERSE.  He also wrote BENJAMIN FRANKLIN - AN AMERICAN LIFE, which I may read next.  Funny how as one gets older, fiction often is less interesting than real life. 


Many, many people were involved in getting the details of Einstein's life and the science right, and even HS science teachers were brought in to bring the scientific explanations down to high school level so we'd all have a chance of understanding it.  It's 551 pages long, plus an additional 125 pages of credits!  It starts out with a few pages describing the "main characters" in the book.  I'm just getting started, but I can tell it's going to be fascinating. 


I have been reading your story...

My heart goes out to you.  You have been through a lot of anguish.  I think the fact that you are trying the best that you can shows that you are going to make it through this. 


I agree that at first your husband should be the one to set limits, but there is nothing wrong with watching him and learning from him, so that you can take baby steps to establish limits (of course these should be abided by both parents) too.  Not only for your daughter's sake, but for your sake too.  She needs to respect you too.


Good luck.  I hope the best for you and your family.


Tell me what you are reading this summer

I love to read. Anything and everything.

But!

I lost my reading muse awhile back and can't seem to find it.

And!

When I had it I almost read 24/7.

Nora Roberts/JD. Robb, Bea Small, Linda Howard, Karen Marie Moning, Janet Chapman, Kristin Hannah *old books*, and many, many more.


So, what you're reading, what you've read and what you want to read.


Just gained 5 lbs. reading above sm
Hash brown recipe simply scrumptious, I use crushed potato chips for the topping. I once used grated parmesan cheese (the kind you put on spaghetti) instead of grating it myself and it was absolutely delicious (expensive) but so easy. I also make a carrot cake with the crushed pineapple and use 2 jars of baby food carrots instead of shredding. (Lost that receipe someplace.)  Just call me lazy, I guess. Gosh, now I have to go and stuff my face. You all make it sound so good, I can smell it cooking!