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The lawyer and the money

Posted By: sm on 2007-02-08
In Reply to: Who cares about the money? --sm - nn

Well, it seems kinda funny that shortly after her court case was settled her son died. Then, she had the committment ceremony with the sleazy lawyer. Now, a few months later she dies? Wonder who her beneficiary is. It could shed some light on the events surrounding her and her son's deaths. I wouldn't say it's all about the money, but it does seem suspicious. I still wouldn't be surprised if it winds up just being a drug overdose though.


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I'd tell him to save HIS money for a divorce lawyer sm
He seems kind of rude to me. No way my hubby would dictate to me like that.  He knows I would show him the door
How much money rasied for Katrina, how much money for the diasters due to the tidal waves and what?
Every single one of them have had some smoke around it with the money not getting to where it was supposed to go. I did not contribute, I hardly watched, was not caught up again as I have seen things like this before. They should give a all you can give benefit for Darfur where people are being massacared each and every day. Genocide going on there each and every day. I have not seen any benefits to help them out yet.
What's your lawyer doing
If you're separated, why aren't you and the kids in the family residence, or why isn't your ex forking over child support and alimony so you can afford your own place?

Check with welfare, Medicaid and children's services in your town to see what programs you're eligible for.

If its untenable to reside with your parents, go to a shelter until you resolve the money issues and then get your own place.

Save yourself. Light a fire under that lawyer and be more pro-active. Take charge, it you can't do it for yourself, find the strength to do it for your kid's future.
Might need to consider another lawyer
My BIL turned down for disability before, got another lawyer and it made all the difference in the world and he got his disability after being turned down before a judge. Is this lawyer strictly in the disability field or could you perhaps get a second opinion. It would not hurt to try.
I'm not a lawyer yet but...
If that bill really was first incurred in 1987 (!!!!!) there is no way on earth that it should be collectable from ANYBODY, let alone the minor child at the time!

That said, most states have a statute of limitations. Most states (you never said which state you're in, so I can't look up that state's regulations) start counting a statute of limitations from when the most recent payment was made on the account. So if your parents stopped making payments on the bill in 1999, then in a state with a 6-year statute of limitations (SOL), then legally the hospital or any secondary debt collectors cannot take legal action to collect the debt after 2005.

Now....

Not being able to take legal action to collect the debt does NOT mean that they can't try to weasel it out of you through guilt or intimidation. But they don't have a legal leg to stand on to enforce anything once the SOL has run out.

So...

They never should have gone after YOU no matter what.

And they never should have even had it in their records from 6 years after your parents last made a payment on it.

Like somebody else said - tell them to pound sand! LOL!
Doctor says to lawyer
We were born on the same year, month, day, and minute. We were born in the same hospital, hospital room and we have the same 2 parents. We are not twins and we have no brothers. Explain this.
Which one? The lawyer or radio DJ..nm
x
I'd get a lawyer ASAP and have those
before he spends it all on the other woman or hides it offshore.  No way would I let my half go with him and that other woman.  I know this may sound a little harsh, but your mom needs to wake up and do something now before it's too late. 
She told her lawyer...sm
That he wouldn't get out because he said he didn't have to until the divorce was final and she can't make him leave until then which is next week. The lawyer can and will make him get out. Her lawyer is very crude and ruthless. She hates to go through all of that though. She wants him to peacefully leave. When the divorce is final she could call the sheriff's dept. and they could make him leave but she really said this would hurt her so to have to do that. It is hard enough without all that.
Mama has told him go live with the other woman. I don't think the other woman wants him there. See she is just using him because daddy has it bad for her and she uses it to her advantage to get anything she wants from him. To tell you the extent, he had around $70,000 cash in the bank less than a year ago and it is gone. My mama has seen the other woman's mame signed where she goes to his bank and everything and is allowed to get cash out. So she is just using my daddy for money and he knows this but he has it so bad for her he lets her do it. He is now broke and has no more money or not much anyway. This woman has broke him but it is his own fault for letting her. He should be smarter than that. She doesn't want him living with her I don't think or he would. I don't know. But my mom says if you hadn't gave her all your money you would have money to find a place to live. She says not her problem. Which is true.
Talk to a lawyer first - sm
I had the exact situation listed here above, house in DH name, family 4 hours away, no money, etc. In my state, VA, it is a equiable distribution state, meaning they divide it fairly, it is not an automatic 50/50 they take in each persons contributions, etc. So in my case the house would have been 40% mine as he put down the 20% on the house from the sale of his house. Our debt would have probably held where it was about 55% mine versus 45% his, or actually I might have ended up with more as my name was listed as a user on one of his accounts and I did deceive him. In my case, I was hoping he would leave, go live with his brother in MD or rent the apt. next door (neighbor has a vacant apt. over garage, tenant just died), but he would not have done it willingly. Even now after we have worked through everything, he said the other day if I screwed it up again he was taking the kids to his parents, leaving me, and would burn the house down so I got nothing. Sweet. (then again he'd be in jail and I would have the kids and the insurance money if there was any--doubtful since it would be arson). Like I said it has not been all roses but it is going well for the most part. In my case I am glad it was not the end of my marriage though I thought it would be; I talked to a lawyer in anticipation , $160 for 45 mintues, but well worth it.
Yes, get a divorce lawyer - sm
I talked to one before I confessed to my DH about the debt he knew nothing about ($88K) figuring my marriage would be over. In the event of a divorce I would have walked away with no debt, no home, but enough leftover to either buy a house with a good downpayment, or rent and be able to afford it for quite a while. I know my DH would have tried to get the kids too but I don't think he would have "won" despite my deception about the debt. I do everything for my kids, he does nothing except make dinner a couple times a week and takes them to the movies or skating every 3-4 weeks, that is it. I never got so low as to open cards in his name, and I am thankful I never sunk to that level though it did cross my mind once or twice I knew it was horribly wrong. I suspect he just filled out them in your name, maybe even on line, and then transfered his debt to yours, possibly putting himself as a user on the account, but even w/o doing that he could still transfer his debt to "your card", I know, I would transfer debt off my husband's cards onto mine so his credit would stay pristine, and so he would not find out. I would inform the companies that you did not open the accounts, have a fraud investigation started. As for telling him about the debt, since you are already heading for divorce, I would not tell him a thing, let the lawyers figure it out. They will do a list of assets and debts and figure it all out in the settlement. He can find out then. Run a credit report on yourself and find out how many cards he opened up in your name, and call each one, or better yet talk to a lawyer first and see what they have to say on the matter. I know my mess was/is bad but very thankful my DH ended up to be forgiving enough or just too lazy to go thru another divorce (I am his 2nd wife), and/or did not want to put the kids thru that. But the sooner you get the ball rolling and start taking care of things the better you will feel, I know, I feel so much better now. You kids will be happier too. Do not stay for the kids or keeping a stable home, etc. If you are miserable, then they are too and it is a horrible example for them. In my case a miracle happened and things are better than they have been in a long time, but it sounds like your case is terminal. I wish you the best of luck.
She needs to talk to a lawyer before doing - sm
anything. Before I confessed to my DH about our debt back in Oct./Nov., cannot even remember when now, I talked to a lawyer as I wanted to know what my rights were and where I would stand in the event of a divorce. She was quite clear about not taking the kids out of the state. Once your friend has a custody agreement in place then maybe, obviously the lawyer and courthouse clerk could best advise her on that, but there are a lot of things that need to be done prior to that or he can call the cops, etc. He sounds like a primo A-hole. She needs to move fast before they lose their house though.
But her money is her money to spend as she pleases -
I don't understand how you can think it is wrong for her to spend whatever she wants to on whatever she buys. It is their personal money they spend. It is not like they are saying give me those shoes and add it to the taxpayer's bill.

And in all actuality, they are saying spend, spend, spend to get the economy going.

I am sorry, I am jealous that some people still have plenty of money to spend and I don't, but I don't expect those people to quit spending just because I had to.
CPS does tell if lawyer gets involved. have had every detail given to me before sm
when they were called in me for my kids riding their bikes in the neighborhood streets like every kid in the neighborhood did. we hired lawyer, refused the one on one investigation at school with the kids, and had the "meeting" at the laywers office. never allowed them in our home, but our lawyer got every detail of the report, which was passed onto us. we had the date, the name of the person who called, their address, everything.
You can probably make-up a date to see a lawyer
because marriage is based on truth.  Just tell him you are done!  End of story.  If he catches you in a lie, that could spell trouble.  JMO.    
Time for a call to a lawyer.
x
Take this to a lawyer. Fight for him. This cannot be legal.
asf
I did talk to a lawyer too before I dropped - sm
the bomb on my DH as I wanted to know where I stood. I live in a state where they do an equitable disbursement of the marital goods, assets, etc. I would have a 40% stake in the house, entitled to about $100K in his 401K (1/2 of its growth since we married), 1/2 of assets we purchased together. Though a judge would deem what it fair, either way I would walk away debt-free though I would not have a home if we sold everything. He told me in one of his pissy moments that if we lose the house (which there is no danger of) he is moving in with his parents with the kids and I am on my own. What he does not realize that no judge would give him custody (has depression , threatened suicide, etc) and the kids would want to be with me. He has a temper too that gets the better of him too much and he is an alcoholic as well. So if a judge gave him custody I would be totally shocked. I am relatively healthy though overweight by 70 pounds, drink a glass of wine 5 days a week maybe (that is it--he drinks 9-12 beers a day --every day--- though he has cut down to 9 since the 13th for which I am happy for though I'd rather he quit altogether---But good thing to find out where you would stand in a divorce and what you would need to do in terms of custody if push came to shove.
probably call a lawyer dont you think?
Maybe she could see a counselor herself and see if they could help her to make the decision or at least scoot her in the right direction about what she needs to do or who to talk to.

That's too bad of a situation... wish her the best
Go talk to a lawyer pronto - sm
I did this before I confessed to my DH about our debt issues back in October as our house is in his name only as is the mortgage, and wanted to know where I stood with my "share" of our assets. If it was bought after you married, as ours was, then it is maritial property. The division is not 50/50 unless you both contributed equally to the downpayment, in my case he used the money from the sale of our (his) former house that he had before we married. So my share would be something like 40%. Our two cars are in both our names, except our boat and utility trailer, those are his which is just fine with me. I also have no money, but he (we) has a very nice 401K (still by some miracle), of which I would be entitled 50% of the earnings in the time period of our marriage. But basically regardless of whose name is on what it is maritial property as long as you lived in it together and you contributed to the household in some way whether it is paying all the bills, or some, or staying home to take care of the kids, it is a contribution. They figure out all the percentages, etc. I would not leave the home though, he will say you left the marriage, etc. Call around, see if you can get a free consult or a discounted consult. I think I paid $160 for my 45 minute phone call but I felt much better for doing so. Luckily I did not end up needing the lawyer, but I was ready to do so if necessary. Good Luck.
,,,use your support system, and find a lawyer who
s
Machine of my choice - divorce lawyer
I couldn't live like that. Besides the awful stench and the health hazards, I wouldn't stand for his lack of respect for me.
Call lawyer! Nobody here is atty. Consultation will
x
Good point, I will be contacting a lawyer - sm
to get their input, though I wil probably do the filing solo so I save money, only about $300 if I do it myself. Just need to get info and follow the rules.
Oh sorry. I thought he was a lawyer and the other two guys' father was judge. sm
My bad, but either way daddy can get him out of it.
Good luck but I doubt you will find a lawyer sm
First of all, I am glad that your sister knows the truth and is not dying. Unfortunately I know from experience what it is like for a loved one to be given a misdiagnosis death sentence. My father-in-law went in the hospital almost 2 years ago with trouble swallowing and ended up getting referred to an ENT that sent him over to a neurologist. He did an EMG/NCS on his tongue, said he had ALS, and to prepare within 6 months to make a decision on being on a ventilator or being DNR. He had to quit working early & be fed through a PEG for over a year, during which time I took him to a different neurologist, a specialist in motor neuron diseases, who said that EMGs performed on the tongue are unreliable and that he had no evidence of ALS at all. Basically what had happened is that his vocal cord was not working properly, and the ENT said it was paralyzed, which is was not. Because the first neurologist just assumed the ENT was correct, he made the diagnosis. I tried calling a few lawyers for the pain and suffering aspect, but unless you want to try through civil court, there is no malpractice involved because there was no permanent physical damage done. They're lucky he didn't follow through with the suicidal thoughts he was having when he was first told all of this bullcr@p.
Find a lawyer, find out where you would stand - sm
in the event of a divorce/separation, regarding custody, house, etc. Custody was my main concern as well since I lied on numerous occasions about the finances. Where I am I was told that would not factor in to the custody at all. I can prove that I am my kids caregiver 90% of the time, I ferry they around everywhere, help with homework, get ready for school, meet at busstop, etc. I could also point out my husband is an alcoholic, self treats his depression with alcohol instead of getting proper medical treatment, has threatend to kill himself (or me) numerous times (though he always says he was joking and did not mean it.....that is his standard answer to everything, or that he never said that). Now I do love him enough to deal with all that because deep down inside my DH is full of it, luckily for me, he has never followed through on anything he says he is going to do. But I thought my confession would be the straw that broke it all and send him over the edge. He still is angry with me, I am sure he will be for a long time, but is keeping it together pretty well, though he has said the stress was going to kill him, now he know how I felt I guess. I am sorry your husband is such a smuck. I feel like a dog sometimes with the sex demands, have to do it the night before he goes out of town....he will be traveling a lot for work for the next 3-4 months, which I am more than glad about, much calmer here then, though it gets tiring for me but as he is not really helping much right now it really won't be much of a change. As for yours going on 5 day weekends.....have you considered having him followed, sounds like there may be some infidelity afoot, and if so that would strengthen your case in the event of a divorce and custody I would think. Sounds a bit fishy going out until 1 a.m. and his frequent trips. My DH fishes too, but he goes 2 miles from here with one of our male neighbors, they shoot the breeze and he gets to unwind some which I encourage. Very rare weekends with a buddy of his, I am talking once every 2 years, which again is fine with me. Start keeping track of all you do, when he is home, where he supposedly goes, with whom, etc. He cannot show he will be a responsible dad if he is never there or never interacts with his own kids. My DH would probably suggest I take our older daughter and he the younger, spliting them up, he has the same perception, the oldest is mine, the youngest is his. Our younger daughter is much easier to deal with, our older daughter drives him nuts and she is only 10. My younger one (8) knows something has been going one though, and worries we will divorce, which she does not want. She is very perceptive for her years. I hope that if you do go the divorce route, which would actually probably be best in your situation, that it all works out for you and you get your fair share of assets, etc. Make sure before you do anything like that you have all your ducks in a row, so talk to divorce lawyer. I talked to one for 45 minutes, cost me $160 but was worth it to set my mind at ease. Good luck.
You are right on the money here...

What great advice!!! I too did a lot of what you have listed in your post.  It worked!!! When rules/expectations are in black and white, it's pretty hard to argue about it...


My 2 teens do their own laundry, clean the kitchen after supper, clean their bathroom, and now that they both work, buy the majority of their "things."


The key, I believe, is responsibility.  Kids thrive with responsibility.  They may moan and groan about it, but in reality, they thrive with rules and responsibility.  Good luck!!!


She is right on the money about that - sm
As I said in my post above. The discipline at our former (private) school was a joke. Luckily the majority of the kids at this school are good kids, but there are a few bad apples that would never be allowed to get away with what is tolerated at this school. The nutcase (or strangler) in my daughter's former class at the private school would have been expelled by now from a public school. Amazing what they will put up with for $6K a year and an alumni mother. Oh, and of course they have no type of a counselor or psychiatrist at the private school, no nurse even. They had a real cow when Jenny was in chemo and dealing with that. But that is another story.
Money.
Money or a gift certificate to whatever craft store they shop at when they get supplies for the kids. You can also donate money to the teachers "account" at school and it's tax deductible.
Where to put my money

I am selling my house and moving overseas. I will have between 250,000 and 275,000 after agent fees and loan pay off. I want to take about 50,000 and put in a money market account attached to my checking and savings accounts for easy access for things as I need them and for unforeseen expenses.


I don't know how best to use the other approximately $200,000. I will not have a job. My only income right now will be about $1150 a month from my rental property. I would like to invest my other $200,000 and live on the interest combined with my rental income. What is the best return I am looking at?


Of course I know I need to talk to my accountant and maybe hire a financial adviser but I'd like to hear some thoughts and get some direction so I can research it a bit myself.


5% for a money market is okay but is there a better way to structure this? In a couple of years I may want to use this $200,000 to purchase a home or business so it can't be away for good but 3-5 years is okay.


I keep getting told about going offshore because I won't have to pay taxes on the interest and with internet banking it is easy to transfer funds and make payments.


Of course you can tell I am a novice but I would like to start researching my best options. Any advice?


Money - Should I be mad or not?
Suppose you had a friend who was very nice all the time, to everyone, can't stand to hear anyone say an unkind word about anyone. Suppose this friend had come crying to you several times over a period of a couple of months with financial difficulties, and rather than loan them the money (which would prolong the difficulty in my opinion), you just gave it to them to help them get caught up.   It was a necessity and children involved, etc..  So you helped them....anyway...

What if after that, it became a regular monthly, and sometimes semi-monthly event, where there was some major issue of why this person needs money, you figured they must really be having a hard time, felt sorry for the children, and helped a couple more times. 

 

It is my feeling that when you give someone something, it is theirs, so you shouldn't even ask what they did with it.  But suppose now you find out that they have purchased something fairly expensive ($400) that is a completely unnecessary luxury item (game), that they had to have purchased during the timeframe you were helping them, and mentioned some other things they have been doing recently - things that you yourself can't even afford to do!!   Would you feel you had a right to be upset or would you just say to yourself that they have a right to have a life and once they had money, to spend it how they want?  This happened to me recently, and while I have decided not to give them any more money, I am not sure if I should be angry or not?

Boy, that's a lot of money. I think about that old man in WV? who won
xx
Well, let me see, about money
I have been given money beyond my wildest dreams, from money I got after being outsourced 6 years from a previous employer, over 100,000 (where did it come from?, got retirement when I left there to money given to me by family member and then after this person's death, sold property left to me by them, sold a property I had before this one- the main thing though and I have said this time and time again- I try my best to help others out, choose either animals or people, whatever touches my heart. This Christmas picked some people out from Craigs List and did things for them. I do not do to get because my heart is just like that but things are always coming to me. My mother told me as a child I was like this, giving and I really believe it just comes back- Karma.
Money...
First of all, I can't understand why you would give him money...secondly, he probably is getting it from another woman.  Guess you should just deal with it, it's really not any of your business where the money's coming from...are you engaged or otherwise committed to one another?
Boy, do I need the money
I might not receive it as I made just under $3000.00. The rest of my income was around $11000.00 from SSD. I had two major surgeries last year, and being an IC, have no benefits.

 

Now, if people in my income level don't need the refund more than the upper limit that was set, I don't know who does! Why in the world they would need it is ridiculous. I can definitely use it for bills, or better yet....FOOD!!

The money came from
my father- I was his only next of kin- no siblings living on my side or father's side, his wife not living. My son and his family had already received close to $100,000 from my father earlier.
you had money for that
the possibility of being on welfare? seems to me welfare wouldn't even have been a possibility if you had money for her college tuition plus. probably could have dropped a job or two. ?
See when it comes to having money around
I usually don’t have, don’t keep as much as $5.00 in the house but when I take her home and pay her, usually stop at the bank to use ATM so no money could be taken from the house. I think if you needed items such as the ones I listed (hubs said also has been missing laundry powders and things like cleaning solutions- he notices these things much more than I do (1 time had told me he had missing herbs he had bought- did not have to worry about me using as I do not cook). I hate to think about losing the help but then again cannot stand the fact of her stealing- by the way, the panties so new might have still had tags on them??
Where is all the money going


money

Has anybody ever heard of a Transcriptionist winning the lotto?  thought not...lol, and if you did, I bet she didn't keep on working!


He kept his $10 and only used her money for gas.
x
We can get you MONEY
The injury lawyers always say that phrase and I hate it!

It's my money and I want it NOW!
x
Of course they are...where's the money in
finding a cure for ANY ailment or disease? Wouldn't you think with all of the fantastic doctors and scientists this country has, the numerous telethons, fund raisers, charitable contributions, endowments, etc, that one cure for one disease would be found? Healthcare is the one industry that will probably never face a downturn, let alone financial crisis. Baby boomers = ailments and disease, ailments and disease = money; any wonder drug dries all that money up. I sometimes type people who are on 10, 20, 30 medications...what a racket.
money

I can agree completely.  Robbing Peter to pay Paul.  Just stinks all around. 


I would bet a lot of money
you did not read a single link that I posted. Not a single one.

Now your posts have degenerated even below jeering; you're going for personal attacks on my family. About whom you know absolutely nothing. As if that will somehow bolster your case.

It's pathetic, really.


Got money?
Golf courses, so I have heard.
Right-e-o -- all they want is more money.
nm
money woes

Here is the real question:  Does your husband work just as hard as you, but doesn't make as much, or is he a freeloader? 


If he works as hard as you, I think it's a terrible idea to put your money into another account.  You need to be a team and if you can't be a team on this matter, you won't stay together.  If you're still in love with each other, you can make this work.  You should be doing the bills together, so he can see how much is left and why you can't afford the things he is buying.  Men are selfish creatures and they can be dumb, too.  Don't assume he understands exactly how you feel.  Tell him you are feeling taken advantage of. 


If he is a freeloader, well, I don't know what to say except that most likely he will always be one.  Do you want to live this way forever?


Have you heard of Dave Ramsey?   He is very wise regarding money and has a lot to teach couples.   daveramsey.com


With that kind of money,
she could have easily afforded to pay you back without filing on the insurance. She should have offered to have paid you half back at least. I think that would have settled it.

Don't take your parents not choosing sides personally. They are probably trying to not make the situation worse than it already is. They are probably hoping you two will work this out somehow. Them getting involved will only make it worse.

Besides everything she has done, losing your family is just not worth it. I hope that you can find a way to work this out. My brother passed away and my sister is missing. I would give ANYTHING to have them back.