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This is such an amazing story. sm

Posted By: I love miracles on 2008-01-04
In Reply to:

 

Doctors say they have never seen anything like it: A window washer who fell 47 stories from the roof of a Manhattan skyscraper is now awake, talking to his family and expected to walk again.

Alcides Moreno, 37, plummeted almost 500 feet in a Dec. 7 scaffolding collapse that killed his brother.

Somehow, Moreno lived, and doctors at New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Weill Cornell Medical Center announced Thursday that his recovery has been astonishing.

He has movement in all his limbs. He is breathing on his own. And on Christmas Day, he opened his mouth and spoke for the first time since the accident.

His wife, Rosario Moreno, cried as she thanked the doctors and nurses who kept him alive.

"Thank God for the miracle that we had," she said. "He keeps telling me that it just wasn't his time."

Dr. Herbert Pardes, the hospital's president, described Moreno's condition when he arrived for treatment as "a complete disaster."

Both legs and his right arm and wrist were broken in several places. He had severe injuries to his chest, his abdomen and his spinal column. His brain was bleeding. Everything was bleeding, it seemed.

In those first critical hours, doctors pumped 24 units of donated blood into his body - about twice his entire blood volume.

They gave him plasma and platelets and a drug to stimulate clotting and stop the hemorrhaging. They inserted a catheter into his brain to reduce swelling and cut open his abdomen to relieve pressure on his organs.

Moreno was at the edge of consciousness when he was brought in. Doctors sedated him, performed a tracheotomy and put him on a ventilator.

His condition was so unstable, doctors worried that even a mild jostle might kill him, so they performed his first surgery without moving him to an operating room.

Nine orthopedic operations followed to piece together his broken body.

Yet, even when things were at their worst, the hospital's staff marveled at his luck.

Incredibly, Moreno's head injuries were relatively minor for a fall victim. Neurosurgeon John Boockvar said the window washer also managed to avoid a paralyzing spinal cord injury, even though he suffered a shattered vertebra.

"If you are a believer in miracles, this would be one," said the hospital's chief of surgery, Dr. Philip Barie.

New York-Presbyterian has treated people who have tumbled from great heights before, including a patient who survived a 19-story fall, but most of those tales end sadly.

The death rate from even a three-story fall is about 50 percent, Barie said. People who fall more than 10 stories almost never survive.

"Forty-seven floors is virtually beyond belief," Pardes said.

Science may never be able to explain what protected Moreno when the platform he and his brother were using atop an Upper East Side apartment tower broke free and fell to the ground.

Edgar Moreno, 30, of Linden N.J., died instantly. He was buried in Ecuador, where the brothers are from.

Alcides Moreno, whom his wife described as strong and athletic, may have clung to his scaffolding platform as it dropped. It is possible that the metal platform offered him some protection, although doctors said they were unsure how.

An investigation into the cause of the accident continues.

Rosario Moreno said that her husband remembers little of the fall but that he didn't need to be told his brother had died.

The injured window washer spent about three weeks on a ventilator, unable to speak, and initially his only means of communication was by touch.

"He wanted to touch my face, touch my hair," Rosario Moreno said.

She would take his hand and hold it to her skin. Then, one day, he reached out and touched one of the nurses.

Rosario Moreno said that when she heard about it, she jokingly lectured her husband to keep his hands to himself. He answered in English, "What did I do?"

"It stunned me," she said, "because I didn't know he could speak."

There is still a rough road ahead for the tough New Jersey man, a father of three children, ages 14, 8 and 6.

He was scheduled to undergo another spinal surgery on Friday, and he will need another operation to reconstruct his abdominal wall. There is a chance he could develop complications, even life-threatening ones, during the months ahead.

Moreno will remain in the hospital for at least a few more weeks, doctors said. After that, he will need extensive physical rehabilitation. It may be another year before doctors know how much he will improve.

The medical staff was guarded Thursday about his prospects for returning to a normal life. Doctors said they believe he will walk, but they also suggested that some of his injuries are likely to be lifelong.

"We're optimistic for a very substantial recovery, eventually," Barie said

Rosario Moreno said she knows this much for sure: His days as a window washer are over. "I told him, 'You're not going back to work there,'" she said.


Posted by LS


CBS and Associated Press contributed to this report.
 



NEW YORK -- (AP) Doctors say they have never seen anything like it: A window washer who fell 47 stories from the roof of a Manhattan skyscraper is now awake, talking to his family and expected to walk again.

Alcides Moreno, 37, plummeted almost 500 feet in a Dec. 7 scaffolding collapse that killed his brother.

Somehow, Moreno lived, and doctors at New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Weill Cornell Medical Center announced Thursday that his recovery has been astonishing.

He has movement in all his limbs. He is breathing on his own. And on Christmas Day, he opened his mouth and spoke for the first time since the accident.

His wife, Rosario Moreno, cried as she thanked the doctors and nurses who kept him alive.

"Thank God for the miracle that we had," she said. "He keeps telling me that it just wasn't his time."

Dr. Herbert Pardes, the hospital's president, described Moreno's condition when he arrived for treatment as "a complete disaster."

Both legs and his right arm and wrist were broken in several places. He had severe injuries to his chest, his abdomen and his spinal column. His brain was bleeding. Everything was bleeding, it seemed.

In those first critical hours, doctors pumped 24 units of donated blood into his body - about twice his entire blood volume.

They gave him plasma and platelets and a drug to stimulate clotting and stop the hemorrhaging. They inserted a catheter into his brain to reduce swelling and cut open his abdomen to relieve pressure on his organs.

Moreno was at the edge of consciousness when he was brought in. Doctors sedated him, performed a tracheotomy and put him on a ventilator.

His condition was so unstable, doctors worried that even a mild jostle might kill him, so they performed his first surgery without moving him to an operating room.

Nine orthopedic operations followed to piece together his broken body.

Yet, even when things were at their worst, the hospital's staff marveled at his luck.

Incredibly, Moreno's head injuries were relatively minor for a fall victim. Neurosurgeon John Boockvar said the window washer also managed to avoid a paralyzing spinal cord injury, even though he suffered a shattered vertebra.

"If you are a believer in miracles, this would be one," said the hospital's chief of surgery, Dr. Philip Barie.

New York-Presbyterian has treated people who have tumbled from great heights before, including a patient who survived a 19-story fall, but most of those tales end sadly.

The death rate from even a three-story fall is about 50 percent, Barie said. People who fall more than 10 stories almost never survive.

"Forty-seven floors is virtually beyond belief," Pardes said.

Science may never be able to explain what protected Moreno when the platform he and his brother were using atop an Upper East Side apartment tower broke free and fell to the ground.

Edgar Moreno, 30, of Linden N.J., died instantly. He was buried in Ecuador, where the brothers are from.

Alcides Moreno, whom his wife described as strong and athletic, may have clung to his scaffolding platform as it dropped. It is possible that the metal platform offered him some protection, although doctors said they were unsure how.

An investigation into the cause of the accident continues.

Rosario Moreno said that her husband remembers little of the fall but that he didn't need to be told his brother had died.

The injured window washer spent about three weeks on a ventilator, unable to speak, and initially his only means of communication was by touch.

"He wanted to touch my face, touch my hair," Rosario Moreno said.

She would take his hand and hold it to her skin. Then, one day, he reached out and touched one of the nurses.

Rosario Moreno said that when she heard about it, she jokingly lectured her husband to keep his hands to himself. He answered in English, "What did I do?"

"It stunned me," she said, "because I didn't know he could speak."

There is still a rough road ahead for the tough New Jersey man, a father of three children, ages 14, 8 and 6.

He was scheduled to undergo another spinal surgery on Friday, and he will need another operation to reconstruct his abdominal wall. There is a chance he could develop complications, even life-threatening ones, during the months ahead.

Moreno will remain in the hospital for at least a few more weeks, doctors said. After that, he will need extensive physical rehabilitation. It may be another year before doctors know how much he will improve.

The medical staff was guarded Thursday about his prospects for returning to a normal life. Doctors said they believe he will walk, but they also suggested that some of his injuries are likely to be lifelong.

"We're optimistic for a very substantial recovery, eventually," Barie said

Rosario Moreno said she knows this much for sure: His days as a window washer are over. "I told him, 'You're not going back to work there,'" she said.


Posted by LS


CBS and Associated Press contributed to this report.




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An amazing story of an 11 yo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33ASQhDvfGs
thanks for this amazing story!.......sm
So in this case his guardian angel is stronger than the devil. I would definitely not like to stand beside him in case of lightning, as he will attract the lightening, he will be saved and I will be struck! LOL !
Unless it is judgement day for him.
3 posts down - story about amazing guy!
It's a video that you must see if you haven't. He is an amazingly inspirational person. I am going to try to find the article the poster is referring to and read it. He is cool.
positive press & Amazing story

http://www.wdsu.com/video/18244963/index.html


http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2008/12/10/dnt.dog.saves.family.kwtv


you are amazing, SM.....

I believe there is a reward in time for those who, like you, take care of animals that others have abused and discarded, or just abandoned for whatever reasons. 


You are special.  


amazing
I used to be the personal secretary of one.  Took the job because I thought it was a hoax and was curious as to how she pulled it off.  It was no hoax.  She definitely had a gift.  She is deceased now.  Won't mention name.  Most amazing job I ever had. 
It's really amazing

Someone makes a light-hearted post, even adds a laughing smiley to it, and everybody jumps on the "holier-than-thou" bandwagon.


It's a JOKE!!  Lighten up!!!  


Wow, that's amazing
They are so graceful!
Amazing . . .
I get the biggest kick when I look out my window also, and see an unusual bird. It makes my day. I could have a crappy, uneventful day, but when I see a rare bird out in the feeder, it brings me back to what is important in life. I can't help but think,
All things bright and beautiful, all things great and small, the Lord God made them all.

Amazing
So odd that people think it is more better for endless children to be born to people who are in no shape to be parents than to use birth control ... like that is humane or something.
Amazing!
Yippeee!
Not really that amazing, is it?
I wondered the same thing - is this the most interesting thing they could come up with? I mean, when I first saw the pictures of what looked like a man with a big pregnant belly, it kind of struck me, but once you know the story, it's nothing, really. How can they make a whole show about this? There HAS to be a better story out there somewhere. Almost anything would be more interesting than this.

*YAWN*


Amazing
I was around 10 years old when this happened, and to this day, in my mind I can see & hear him on TV saying in that wooden way, "I dove repeatedly..."

I was just a kid then, but he sounded completely fake to me. Just...creepy. Amazing how clear that image is, for some reason; my first memorable experience of someone famous getting away with it. I think my little psyche was just completely blown away. Little did I know then that this is just the way of the world.
Amazing what phobias can do, isn't it? sm
My oral surgeon when I was a teen (17) pulled my wisdom tooth with giving me enough novacaine and had the guts to tell me I didn't feel it, quit being a sissy. I'd rather give birth 20 more times than go through that again. I left the office hysterical, calling him every name in the book and then some. He had an office full of patients who must have thought I was nuts. Then, he went on vacation during my postop period and informed the on call person that I had to wait until he got back for anything. I ran out of pain meds so I solved that with some Jack Daniels mouth rinses (father's childhood remedy, LOL, and I'm telling you, I'm not a drinker at all). Mom and dad took me to the ER but I only got Tylenol there. Big whoop. No help at all. I missed 2 weeks of work over that, severe pain, swollen, black and blue face and even today my jaw clicks. I get the willies just thinking about it. So, I just never saw anyone else again for 5 years, but did brush and floss faithfully. Then I had 3 children, a disastrous illness that I spent over 10 years on prednisone and now here I am with dentures. LOL. Oh well, things could be much, much worse. I must say, that Camphophenique is working wonders. My mouth felt great today. I even ate regular food, soft of course, and some steak. The steak I had to almost shred and mix with my cottage cheese but I did eat it and didn't need 1 pain pill at all. Not bad for a newbie denture wearer!
What an amazing family.

I cannot even begin to imagine what they are going through.  Now one of his siblings is also showing signs of NEMO as well?!  Oh how awful.  At the end of yesterday's blog input there was this little note:


"P.S. If anyone in Cincinnati knows where you can buy Watermelon or Raspberry Peach Snapple, Conner will be your friend for life!"


Man.


They are both amazing in different ways (sm)
There's room in the world for both of them :-)
Amazing Race! - sm
And Saturday Night Live, (at least on those RARE occasions that they actually have a NEW show, and not something that's been rerun for the 5th time that season.)
Club Med is amazing
You could also try Club Med. They have places all over the world. We've been to the one in Cancun twice, the one in Florida twice (very family friendly), and Bermuda. Just the kind of vacation I love.
The Amazing Race. - nm

Wow - survived in Minnesota. Amazing(sm)
When I bought it I didn't really know what I was getting. I thought it was a tall phlox when I first picked it up. I just read it was plumbago and was drought tolerant, and in my cart it went. When I got home I put it in my front garden and read up on it. I was amazed that it was actually a bush, but I think it will be fine right where I put it, and it should make for lots of blooms. Blue (and purple) are my favorite.
THANK YOU PAT!!! This is amazing! I am now searching for my local sm
charity, Teen Challenge of Georgia. Wow! I'm so glad they are on there! They only had 29 cents in their acct. so far for 2008 and after I searched a few names I jumped them up to 31 cents in about 2 seconds!! I am SO excited because I search ALL day long MTing. I am thrilled that they will earn a little something through my efforts! Thanks!!
They ARE amazing, aren't they? Definitely scary - (sm)
when you're indoors.... so much banging, rattling, stuff falling, etc. But if you're lucky enough to be outdoors, as I was during the 1989 Loma Prieta quake (7.1 on the Richter), it's totally awe-inspiring. I was getting ready to wash my truck, and was carrying a bucket of soapy water across the yard. Suddenly the trees started shaking, and I thought a sudden breeze had come up on what had been a quiet, muggy day. Then I saw that the barn was swaying back and forth, and realized it was a quake. A few steps further, and it really started rolling. Had to hang onto the side of the truck to remain standing. Giant redwood trees were whipping back and forth so far that the tops of them were almost horizontal. We had a large pasture in front of the property for horses, and there were large waves in the ground, moving up and down with more than a foot and a half of vertical displacement. I couldn't help but laugh... it was pretty funny. Interestingly, all the horses turned and stood facing in exactly the direction of the epicenter. Once it stopped & I could let go of the truck, I ran into the landlord's backyard to look at the pool. The waves were big enough to surf on.

A friend of mine who lived up in the Santa Cruz mountains was driving down a long, steep, straight road when the quake hit, and she actually saw a big wave in the pavement (the primary, or P-wave) coming straight at her. She stopped and rode it out in the truck.

Another, very LUCKY friend, had been driving on I-880, and had just emerged from the covered section of freeway that collapsed when the quake hit, so wasn't caught in that awful disaster. He said it was weird... felt like he had a front flat tire, so he stopped on the side of the freeway to check his tires. As did several hundred other people! Imagine the whole freeway stopping, and everyone looking at their tires.... a 'Chinese fire drill', California-style.

My mom lives directly on top of the epicenter of the Northridge quake of ྚ. It was a very sharp vertical quake, and it literally threw her out of her bed, lengthwise. Good thing, because the bookshelf/headboard part of the bed fell over and landed where her head had been on the pillow.

I lived down there during the 1971 Sylmar quake, and I was trying to stay in my bed while it bucked like a bronco. My sister was in the bathroom hanging onto the sink & screaming. We had a jillion aftershocks from that one, which were more unnerving than the original quake. Every time we had an aftershock, another of my sisters started hyperventilating. That night, my parents were having the floor measured for new carpets. The poor contractor doing the measurements was so rattled by the shocks, not to mention everyone screeching and running out of the house when they hit, that he measured everything wrong, and the carpet they brought didn't fit. So a couple weeks later he had to come back and do it all over again. I was in Jr. College back then, and had a part-time job working at a stable. After the quake, when the sun came up I went up to the stables for work that day, and it was too dangerous to clean stalls with the horse in there during the aftershocks, so I had to take each horse out and put it in a corral while I cleaned the stall. Took me forever! I was up there all alone all day, and wasn't really worried, 'til I sat down on the ground to sharpen a pair of animal clippers. THAT'S when I realized that the ground was continually moving all the time.... jiggling very faintly, sort of like Jello. That's what got me feeling spooked.

Another time, I think in the 80's, when I was at work we had a long, not-that-strong, rolling quake. I was in the basement using the copy-machine at the time. I'd had a migraine that day and had just taken Fiorinal for it, which made me feel a little strange sometimes. While at the copy machine, I was feeling really dizzy and strange, and hearing strange creaking noises. I'm thinking, 'Wow... I don't feel so hot!' The rolling continued, and I felt kind of nauseous. Tried not to look at the light in the copier, which has triggered migraines in me in the past. Noticed lots of people standing in the doorway to the Medical Records dept. and Radiation Oncology, and my foggy brain wondered why they were all taking their break at the same time. Still felt sick, and decided that if I didn't feel better within the hour, that I would go home to bed. Right about then, (with the floor still rolling), someone commented to me on how nonchalantly I was copying away during an earthquake! I was actually relieved to learn that's what the problem was, and not a reaction to the medication! :D
I thought David C was amazing
I love both David's and I think they'll both be in the finale. I didn't think Jason did such a good job last night at all, but I think it is Brooke's time to go.
Amazing finale tonight
I'm really happy Joshua won - DH too. Was nice to see the two judges dance too. I looked at DH and said "Well I guess now you know what qualifies them to judge". Debbie Allens students were way too cute, and Nigel could sure move those taps. Loved seeing the older dancers. Dimitri is still a dream. I'd take dancing lessons from him any day.
amazing picture, oh my! my heart to you.
x
May his amazing spirit live on - see message -
The point being lost here is that they could have euthanized him months ago because it was obvious he was never going to race again and make them any big money. They chose to try to help him heal, which I can imagine cost thousands upon thousands of dollars and would be of no financial benefit to them because he would never be able to race again. I think the owners went above and beyond in trying to give him anything they thought was a chance at a happy life back on their farm. He seemed to have an amazing spirit and seemed to be recovering well for the most part. When he took a recent turn for the worse again they made what I am sure was a difficult decision to let him go.
... I gave up! Watched Amazing Race, instead. ; )
.
Really amazing, isn't it? Guess she loves real jewelry or something.
c
Amazing husband, incredible kids, fabulous life!
!
I wouldn't do Wife Swap but would LOVE to do Amazing Race!!
x
There is teacher's side of story, kid's side of story
x
But they all manage to find him in jail. Isn't it amazing ? Jail
dabby
I use Pure Grace and Amazing Grace
Very light. Pure Grace reminds me of being at the beach. I get it from QVC, Philosophy.
And I DO not believe her story, either
This day and time you can get outside help. She kept her eyes down all time while questioned. If in front of Judge Judy she would have to look the judge straight in the eyes. I think she should have gotten much more time, flimsy story, crocodile tears.
come on now...tell the whole story.
You decked her out, right? LOL. If you didn't, she is one lucky woman.
Do you believe this story
For the most part, she blames her actions on stress from her illness. I can (somewhat) see someone stealing to pay bills or to put money aside for savings, but not for a lavish wedding or cruises.

GOFFSTOWN, N.H. -- A woman accused of stealing more than $1 million from her nonprofit employer said she used the money to pay for medical bills, vacations and her daughter's wedding.

"My daughter was getting married; I wanted her to have a nice wedding," said Linda Bevins, who has colon and lung cancer. "I had nothing, it all went to cancer. I thought I was going to die. I wanted to have a good life. I wanted my husband to have peace of mind."

Bevins was fired in June from her job as a payroll supervisor for the Crotched Mountain Foundation, which runs a disabilities rehabilitation center in Greenfield. She, her husband, and daughter now are being sued by the foundation. A criminal investigation is also going on.

Bevins was diagnosed with colon cancer in 1999 and took a job as a payroll specialist with Crotched Mountain in 2001 to help pay her medical bills; she was promoted to supervisor a year later. She told the New Hampshire Sunday News she began taking money in 2004 after doctors told her the cancer had spread to her liver, and the prognosis was not good.

Bevins said she's not certain how much money she took, but doesn't dispute Crotched Mountain's estimate of $1.3 million. She said at least $200,000 went to medical bills for her cancer treatments and another chunk paid for her daughter's wedding, which included a custom-made wedding dress. Bevins said she also took her family on two cruises and used stolen money to make donations to churches and other organizations.

"It bothered me a lot because I was not the type of person to do that," Bevins said of the thefts. "I would get depressed that this was happening and I'd say 'I can't do this anymore.' But then something else would happen and all of a sudden I'm doing it."

An audit commissioned by Crotched Mountain revealed allegations that Bevins issued payroll checks to her daughter, Holly Sears, and herself, and funneled foundation money into personal bank accounts. Bevins said biannual company audits didn't catch her scheme, nor did a co-worker who helped her with the payroll.

Neither her daughter nor husband knew anything about the thefts, though she acknowledged that sometimes she asked Sears, 26, to cash checks for her, Bevins said.

Bevins said she's ashamed of what she's done, but blames at least part of her actions on her former employer.

As the only employee who could handle the payroll, Bevins said she was constantly on call, even while on vacation or sick leave. She said Crotched Mountain workers even called her cell phone while she was in the hospital, and nurses became so fed up by the they asked a doctor to put a stop to it.

"If I didn't have the stress, maybe I wouldn't have gotten sick and wouldn't have had the bills and maybe (the stealing) wouldn't have ever started," she said.

My story...{sm}
I understand.  One time on our way home while on vacation, I was driving through the mountains in Colorado, and I was driving about 50 or 55 mph.  I am not used to driving in the mountains - I'm a flatlander.  My husband got mad at me because I wasn't driving fast enough!  I told him that this is the speed I felt comfortable at.  He told me that someone was going to run into us from behind because I was going so slow.  At the next town we came to, I pulled into a restaurant and told him I wasn't going to drive anymore.  He said that one of us was going to take the bus home from there.  Well, that didn't happen, but it sure was quiet the rest of the trip. 
That's a whole different story
I had a friend in a similar situation. Her hub didn't beat her, but pushed her on several occasions and was generally overbearing in all their day-to-day decisions. She did leave him, but the middle one of her 3 children opted to stay with the dad and the judge allowed it, thus splitting the family. He went on to lavish that child with all kinds of goodies, alienating the oldest child. My friend later moved in with another guy, much like the husband she had left, and at that point, their youngest child refused to change schools and also moved in with her dad.

So, either way, I would suggest counseling for you anyway, if nothing else to insure you don't end up with another man just like the first.

Another cat story . . .
BARTLETT, Tenn. -- Tabitha Cain has fed a feral cat she calls Wild Oats for several years, but now she's thinking of changing its name to Survivor.

That's because she said the cat survived for 19 days with a peanut butter jar stuck on its head.

"We tried to get her, but being the type of cat you can't catch, she kept running and hiding," said Doretha Cain, Tabitha's mother.

The family saw the cat several times and tried in vain to catch her. She disappeared for a week, and the Cains feared the worst.


"I thought she was going to die with that jar on her head," Tabitha Cain said.

They found the once chubby cat on Wednesday, too thin and weak to escape. They caught her with a fishing net and used some oil to get the jar off her head.

They gave her water and treated her wounds and on Friday she began to eat again.

"I've heard of cats having nine lives but I think this one has 19 because she survived 19 days," Doretha Cain said.

Dr. Gerald Blackburn, a veterinarian at Gentle Care Animal hospital in Memphis, said he's heard similar stories of pets getting trapped for days or even weeks at a time and surviving.

Blackburn said the cat may have lived off of its excess fat, but Doretha Cain had another explanation.

"God will take care of animals just like people because that cat is really a miracle," she said.
I believe your story, but
if you could not move, how did you use the phone?
Oh please, the OP's story
is bunk. If this really happened *as described,* anyone adult would realize steps would need to be taken.

Really, someone at the school called her a bad parent over the things she describes?

If it was *truly* over being late in the fog or a flat tire, or "coddling" a second grader, or saying you were encouraging a romantic relationship in 2nd grade (what evidence is that one based on?) wouldn't YOU know you need to deal with that **without posting on an MT board to ask advice???**

Also, she titles the post something about the counselor being "defensive." What exactly was the counselor defensive about? Sounds like she was on the offensive, if she busted a gusset to talk to the OP and considering what she "said." Clearly the OP was on the defensive! Sounds to me like the post changed somewhere between the subject line and the narrative to make the OP sound and feel better.

The post does not ring true. There is more to it than we're getting.
It is her story
Management company wanted her to go to rehab. She asked her dad if he thought she needed to go, and he said no. It may not be pretty but it is a true life story.

I find that much more compelling than Brad Paisley singing about picking ticks off his lady love!
Wow, what a story!
Like, why?  Didn't it hurt eventually?  And how could you sleep that way?
My story was the same, except it was my mom.

Mom dying, dad with Alzheimer's, so I'm taking care of both, though my dad was still independent in ADLs.  I worked at home so I didn't really work and I was supposed to take everyone to the doctor.  My sister had 3 days off, the same time as my son's/husband's birthdays.  She said she would come help one day, but that needed time for herself.  I'm the one with young kids, I'm the one trying to maintain 2 households and work full-time .......  I finally moved in with my parents, gave up any privacy, spent 98% of my waking time when not working taking care of someone or something.  I don't regret it and I would do most of it all over again because I'm a caretaker, but if there are 4 other siblings why should I have to carry the burden.  After my mom died I fell apart.  I had to put my dad in a facility and my sister said she would take over primary caregiver duties, but she was hit or miss.  Her kids were grown and out of the house, her DH was always off playing golf.   She complained that my dad was only getting 2 showers a week, but she wasn't willing to go give him a shower.  She complained about using all her vacation time for doctor's visits - like I didn't have to either take vacation or make up my time.    I could go on and on.   They told us in grief counseling that in most families there is one that always ends up doing everything.


The only thing I can say is that when your dad is gone you can seek comfort in knowing that you did all you could to help him, that you were there for him when it counted.  Your sister will be the only who has to live with the guilt that she wasn't there (and she will suffer, must maybe not right away).   At the same time I think your dad is just thinking about what he wants and I completely understand.  My mother wanted to die at home in her own bed, not a hospital bed, even if she was still at home she didn't want a hospital bed, but I also think it puts a lot of stress on you and one day he will be gone and you'll have to pick up the pieces and continue on and there may be a day when you can no longer care for him at home.


I was very long-winded, but what I'm trying to say is don't worry about your sister.  Focus on your dad and do what you can do and that is all you can do. 


 


My story
I went through very similar circumstances.  I left about 3 times.  Finally in 1998 I made an appointment with a Christian psychiatrist and he agreed to go to see her.  She diagnosed him as being bipolar and Baker Acted him.  Today I can honestly say, he is not the same man.  He is warm and caring and actually helps me with my medical transcription business.  He is on proper medication.  He had proper counseling and support groups.  He was in the hospital for 6 weeks and then went to a 3/4 house, where he received proper counseling and support groups, which were mandatory.  I thank God that he is better today. At the time in 1991 I wish that someone would have diagnosed him as having that propblem, as my older daughter moved out and he has no relationship with her at all and knows that it was his fault back then.  Who knew?  It was a disease that was in the closet so-to-speak, but now I am very concerned about our older daughter.  We have a younger daughter who does forgive him and lives with us who is 25 years old.  I hope you get the help you need before it is too late.
Yes, I saw that same story -sm
I have to admit that the Open Ceremonies were spectacular beyond belief and the Chinese gymnasts are better than ours this time overall, BUT they do seem to be manipulating the system at every turn to present the best possible image for China, even if it means fabricating by any means they can get away with.  I am glad these stories are coming out little by little.  IMHO, if you lie about one thing you will lie about other things...
Seems to be like there is more to this story...
Part of me says "it's only $10" but another part can see the selfishness behind it. I don't know what I would do in this situation. My husband and I usually mutually see what each other has and are both left with equal in their wallets - unless one has plans for needing more and it would eliminate another ATM trip.

I guess a lot would depend if they keep their money separate or have a joint account. With a joint account, its really not his and hers but being separate it becomes more personal for me.

In the same breath, they are married and whether he has a job or not you vow to care for one another in times of need...this might be one of those times, unless he's a dead beat and just doesn't want to get a job and she feels she is being taken advantage of in other ways like she pays for everything while he still buys things for his hobbies, beer, etc.
A sad story...sm

I have a sad story to tell.  My husband's cousin's x-wife had an accident Friday night and was severely injured.  She was coming from a night out and was drinking and wrecked.  She was ejected from the vehicle and suffered severe head trauma.  She was put on life support and was found to be brain dead.  Her parents had to make the decision to pull the plug.  The doctor assured them she had no brain activity and could not breath on her own or anything.  So they unplugged her yesterday.  This young woman was I think if not mistaken 29 years old.  She had 3 children ages 8, 4, and 2.  They have no mother now.  She was so disfigured from the accident that her boyfriend went in ICU to see her and hit the floor as he passed out from the shock of seeing her face.  She never dreamed when she left to go out last Friday night that she wouldn't be returning and she was leaving her kids for the last time to soon find they had no mother.  I had the pleasure of knowing this woman for her brief time here on Earth.  She will be so missed by her children and the rest of her family.  The 8 year old boy is taking it by far the worst because he comprehends what death means and that he won't see his mommy anymore on this Earth.  The 4-year-old just knows mommy is in heaven but can't comprehend that mommy can't come visit her from heaven.  The 2-year-old just doesn't understand at all.  She just misses her mommy.  Brief story about what the 4-year-old said to her mawmaw yesterday:  They were going down the road and she had learned earlier that day her mama was gone to heaven.  She was staring out the window at the sky because she was told that was where mommy was.  She was just desperately hoping for a glimpse of mom I guess.  Then she said mawmaw that's my mom.  And she pointed to the sun.  It was shining really bright inside the car on them.  It was a really sunny day.  Her mawmaw says where baby?  She said do you see the sun mawmaw?  She said yes baby I see it.  She said that's my mommy shining down on me.  She is watching me mawmaw.  This is from a 4-year-old.  Now if that don't break your heart what does?  Pray for these children who have suffered probably the greatest loss they will know.  And please don't drink and drive. 


LOL at the elf story.
What a cute story about the Elf! I love that!

My sister once had a friend call my nephew and saw she was Mrs. Claus. Omg, it was so cute. He was so serious on the phone talking to her. He must have been about 4. He was perfect that year waiting for Christmas and doing everything Mrs. C asked him to do.

I think everyone puts the bag of marshmellows on the oven. That's too funny the things you remember. I'm sure it was funny at the moment though.

I have finally given up shopping the day after Thanksgiving too. It's crazy how mean people can be. Two years ago I sat outside for 3 hours in the dark by myself with a bunch of strangers and didn't get any "great deal" so I vowed never again from that day. Unfortunately, from what I have heard, my mom was one of those mean people trying to get my cabbage patch kid that I spoke of earlier. lol It's very unlike her but I guess you'll do anything if you know it will mean that much to your kids.
your story
AMEN SISTAH!
I *totally* agree with the description of "toxic" family members. I have known the same to be true of so-called friends, too... Some relationships are simply not healthy.
Don't know story - sm
Could it be a custody thing - they were being flown to the non-custodial parent?