never ever force anyone to attending funeral rituals, but especially a child who does not want to go
Posted By: adding my 2 cents on 2006-02-20
In Reply to: Funeral etiquette question for you. sm - dol
nm
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After divorce, child chronic illness, involuntary job change, parents illnesses and death, was force
I frequently regret it, the changes it has made to my life, but when life hands you horror, at least there is this "final solution" to your financial situation. I must admit, I sleep better, and I can finally hold my head up, and I no longer feel hopeless. Find the attorney you can work with,get your free consultation and DO WHAT HE TELLS YOU TO DO. If you have doubts, see a 2nd and a 3rd attorney, till you're comfortable with the person you choose.
is there an RSVP? If so, check not attending
IF there is an RSVP, check off NOT ATTENDING and return it with no gift. If no RSVP, toss it out. *S*
Check with the college you're attending....sm
some of the ones in Georgia have programs like childcare and homework assistance for children of students available at no cost. Good luck to you!
No offense, but your attending the meeting in Boston won't make
heads so far up overseas companies butts, there is no way they are going to change. AAMT might as well go the way of the Do-Do where the US is concerned. I heard that they were changing their name anyway. Why should any US MTs give a rats butt what AAMT thinks or does. The only membership they will have in the future will be offshore. I think it's high time for a new organization, one that doesn't suck up to offshore companies the way AAMT and MTIA does. Of course, my view will be taken as protectionism, which is absurd when my whole view is that jobs are being taken away from American workers and American's privacy is in jeapordy when dictated files get funneled overseas.
Go to NBC10.com - Our local news has "Wednesday's Child" which is a child for adoption.
Every Wednesday they introduce a child who needs a home and a family. There should be some information there as these kids are up for adoption.
www.NBC10.com -
Hope that helps!
WRONG! A child that has a fear of discipline = a well behaved child.
I have a beautiful, intelligent 11 year old daughter that hasn't had a spanking in 6 or 7 years and probably only 3 her entire life. She is very well behaved and I get compliments on her behavior constantly. When she does get out of line all I have to say is, "Shall I call your father?" Call it what you want, it works. She respects and obeys me and her father. Why??? For fear of the facing the consequences of misbehaving. Having a total lack of fear or respect for authority is exactly what's wrong with Generation X/kids today. I turned out just fine as did my siblings. Why?? Because my parents took "time out" to bust our a$$es whenever we got out of line.
Is that clear enough for you???
Funeral services
I agree. I personally did not attend my first funeral until I was in my mid 20s, even when my beloved grandmother died, it was her wish that we "kids" not attent (age 12 at the time). I have never forced my own son to attend as a child either. I now feel obligated to attend services for husband's family, etc but always dread the whole ordeal, even for just a distant relative, etc. Grateful that my parents also will not be having formal services, just simple cremation. You must do what YOU feel is right for your child and your own situation.
funeral etiquette
She is not too young but it would not be good to force her to go. My children went to family funerals with us but we live in the south and are not catholic, do not have a lot of set rituals, just a few songs, some words from a minister, about the person who died and what they meant to the family, closing with prayer and the "last look" at the body. Family and close friends usually go for a short interment ceremony at cemetery . Funerals here are almost always open casket. usually the preacher tells the family they need to prepare for the day when they will be "in the box" forgive the way I put it but that is what they do. The first time we took kids with us, I talked to them and told them what to expect re appearance of the deceased etc. Maybe you could talk to her and explain that this is the last time she will "see" grandmother in this life. If other children are going, she would not want to be the only one that doesn't. However I don't know that much about catholic funerals and if you and your husband agree, that is the main thing. If anyone is rude enough to try to tell you how to run your life in this area, tell them that your husband and you agreed on this. Hope this helps.
Another funeral question...
Any suggestions for different/easy foods to take to widowers? I know when we have had deaths in my family, we are overwhelmed with cold cuts, and the widow works at the bread factory, so I'm sure she's good with that! I need to go over there tomorrow, so whipping something up would be in the midst of working, and that's why it needs to be something relatively easy. I appreciate suggestions.
Seems like everybody's passing nowadays. :(
re: funeral food
Casseroles and quiches are easy, reheat well, and you can use the throwaway pans. There are a million recipes online.
Scotland, with bagpipes at my funeral. nm
NM
Funeral etiquette question for you. sm
Hubby's mom has passed away. Our daughter is 11. She went to my mother's funeral last year and did okay. She insisted on going as she was close to my mom and she was given the decision because of her age. It was also a graveside, closed casket service.
She was never that close to hubby's mom and it's going to be an open casket Catholic funeral with visiting hours at the funeral home, etc. She does NOT want to go. I have some people saying that she has to go as she is the granddaughter and others saying that she is too young for this type of service.
In one way I think that children need to deal with things so that they can mature. Hubby is neutral on this issue as well.
What do you all think?
worked in a funeral home
I used to be a secretary in a funeral home and this is not uncommon at all. Its been years ago, but I think a family would contact the funeral home and the funeral home would then get in touch with the cemetery and make the necessary arrangements with them. I think as far as costs go it was just the opening and closing of the plot. Like I said it has been well over 10 years that I worked there, but call the funeral home and they should be able to take it from there. Hope this helped.
I think I cried more than at my own dad's funeral!! Am I horrible?
nm
Question for ICMT whose was asking about a funeral....sm
What did you decide?
My grandmother died last week and I let my 6-year-old attend the funeral. A child psychologist friend had advised that I should let her do as much as she wanted to do - i.e. if she wanted to see the body in the open casket then let her but if she was scared then don't. A year ago we buried a cat and I was able to relate to her that my grandmother's spirit has moved on to heaven while her body is here on earth, just like with our old cat and she related to that very well. She ended up insisting on seeing the body in the casket. Overall she did very well with the funeral experience. This was her first funeral to attend where she was old enough to have a clue what was going on.
While at the funeral home I read a pamphlet they had for talking to kids about death. It made suggestions of letting a child mourn the way they desire and said that it's helpful for kids to draw pictures about their feelings. I agree with this totally as play/art is what I do with my daughter when she's upset about something and it helps her to talk about it while we're making something artistic.
Transcription For Funeral Homes
Hi
Does anyone know for sure what type of medical transcription funeral homes would use? I don't think they would be autopsies, but someone told me they utilize this service.
Any advice is appreciated.
Thanks....Kymee
The funeral home generally does
not hire MTs. The forensic pathologist hires the MT. You can ask the funeral home for a list of their doctors.
forgot to say we had to go out of town for funeral a couple weeks after our new
nm
I can speak from experience, when I was 11-yr, I had to attend my great-uncle's funeral and it wa
an open casket service. Coming from a predominantly Catholic family, I was told that I had to pay my respects. I can only tell you of the nightmares that I had for the next 2 weeks after that. If she doesn't want to go, don't make her. If the other family members feel it is unacceptable, that is their problem. There are always other ways to pay respect.
it was K-force, but I don't think they do it now.
force yourself ...
... to absolutely stop at every heading.
Think about what you're doing.
Then do the right thing.
It slows you down when doing it, and you'll get aggravated at that too! But little by little you'll find yourself doing it without thinking -- once in awhile. Then all the time.
This is how I learned my short forms when I first started using the expansion programs. I'm so glad I took the time! Others wouldn't do it, and they suffered in the long run. Patience is virtue.
And if they try to FORCE it on us, then if ever there
nm
The day they force me
get certification, CMT or whatever, is the day I retire. Totally ridiculous. What, someone with 20+ years experience is suddenly not qualified without some letters behind their name? Please.
You can't force them to pay what isn't in their
You state you are tired of your life revolving around your PC, used to be this and that. Well, that is your personal choice every single day and minute to sit there in front of that PC.
No one is making you stay in this business if you think it is going under.
Without the understanding of what part of the puzzle your particular job has in the picture for your employer, for your industry, for this country, you'll never be successful at any kind of bargaining or negotiation.
No one said you should feel sorry for MTSOs but before you go off charging like a mad bull, you need to understand what your options are and what the reality of the financial picture is.
I feel more sorry for those who bark off with the general statements that unions will save this work, a strike will bring you more wages, just band together and demand more and POOF, it will happen, etc., than I do for anyone else with other problems here.
After all my time in this work, having been in business with it, worked for other companies (nationals and smaller), it is clear that you are not understanding the whole picture at all.
Vent, gripe, complain - yes - but if you think words such as union or strike or demand are going to get you anywhere, you are sadly mistaken, my friend. It would be more sad to see you lose what you do have because of this.
Of all the companies announcing layoffs each week on the news, not one single company has been an MTSO.
It is not the end.
you have to get rid of this! Force yourself to think
always about what you are doing at the moment. If you do not do this, then the quality of your work - whatever you are doing - is going to suffer.
Do you have a wandering mind, in general? When you transcribe, do you then think about cooking?
I do not mean this ironic or sarcastic, I want to help you.
She's my fave, too. I don't force anyone into my car either.
My son is leaving for the Air Force
I am so proud of him, yet so worried with the situation the world is in right now. Please pray for him if you would!
Yeah, May the force be with you......
n
I'd force her hand. sm
I'd definitely force her to do the deed if that's what she's up to. I sure wouldn't make it easy for her. It sounds like you've done a good job for them all this time. As for the pay, I think I'd be tempted to mention something about how they could afford vacation, but not be able to pay you, especially after you spent your vacation at home. The idea that she'd do that burns me up for you! Furthermore, you know darn well they've got the money. She's just being vindictive. Make sure and update after next week. We'll be wishing you luck with this sticky situation.
yes, legal to ASK--not force as
mandatory. Again, I've worked for other companies before, and I've either been very lucky or, as I've stated, this field has gone much downhill and there is less respect for the work and skills of MTs than ever.
No, it's not their job to give me an easy living, but neither is it my job to lose what little money I do make--compared to their ????--because they've overloaded themselves in their greediness to take on more accounts when they know they don't have enough MTs to cover it.
If I made $250,000 a year and had Air Force One to myself, I'd
take a lot of vacations, too.
Yes, I could easily become a recluse. Force myself to go out
dd
I had to force myself to work with it, but I'm glad that I did.
It took about two weeks until I could get used to the idea of typing words differently. It has really helped with the fatigue in my arms, shoulders, wrists, etc.
Here is why they're trying to force 'certification'
Because we MTs are starting to get wise to them. U.S. MTs began to realize that a CMT was getting them NOTHING. And I think when U.S. membership started to slow to a trickle, that's when they started going after the Indian MTs. (For the sole purpose of course, of making money off of THEM, too). And then of course they'd have another selling point for their offshore workers when trying to sell hospitals on the idea, saying all or most of their offshore workforce is credentialled, but the U.S. MTs are not. So who knows - maybe the Indians have caught on to this con game, as well. After all, they can read these boards, too. So now that we've gotten wise, they're gonna try to FORCE MTs to get their certification. I for one will never give them one cent of my hard-earned income for some useless letters behind my name.
Obama's new task force
Maybe if all of us posted something here about medical transcription jobs being sent overseas, it could help? I'm not exactly sure if this would be the right place, but I think I'm going to write something about it. Have a nice weekend! :)
http://www.whitehouse.gov/strongmiddleclass/
Maybe this will finally force DH and I to NOT eat out so much, save money there. nm
x
Anyone have info on K Force Health care? nm
nm
K-force, yes they still do. They offered me 11 cpl and 40 c/mile in San Bernardino, CA. nm
nm
I'd force her hand while you line up other work.
I would continue doing the work and returning it as soon as it's done. Once you've transribed/printed it's their responsbility from there. I've seen so many docs think they can't afford to pay a measley paycheck but can well afford big houses, cars, vacations. Let's face it, they really don't know what 'tight' is. She seems fishy, very odd. What doc wants you to postpone getting work done? That's just plain bad business. I'm very sorry for you. I think you should keep doing the work, line up something else, and let her squirm and have to face you. If she phases you out by trying to avoid you, nicely get in her face, and make her be accountable for how she's treating you. I'm also very sorry about your husband. You'll be in my prayers.
maybe you oughtta try cherrypicking too...force the co. to deal with bad dictators! nm
1
Head's up! AAMT Task Force has posted about their name change
I know some posters here are members who may be interested for various reasons. :-)
You tell them my sister MQMT. MQ fire patrol out in full force today!
 But we can contain their idiot remarks with logic.
Personally I would not force her to go - she can alway visit the grave site to say goodbye- sm
My mom died about 18 months ago, but has there been a funeral I would not have had my kids there (they were 6 & 4 at the time). I know my in-laws would have thought me a terrible person for that but I would not have cared (my mom donated her body to science-- my dad is too). An open casket is a lot different than a closed one and can make quite an impression on some. I just don't think that is something that should be pushed. She is old enough to make the decision, you should abide by it.
Get out the timer. You'll have to force yourself to work uninterrupted for periods of time.
Just keep in mind that you WANT the money. Best of luck!
Guess what? If companies fired the shoddy MTs, they'd lose more than half their work force in eve
company! Pretty sad state of things, but that's the quality out there right now, and AMERICAN MTs.
Do you expect businesses to cease operating because the U.S. work force refuses to provide services?
What will be wanted is that the immigrants pay taxes and that there are no outlaws coming and going. This is all about taxes.
Actually, chosing "cap after period" will not force a period in the instances I mentioned. --
Even with it checked, it WILL NOT cap after a number with a period in it. Like "white count 14.1. hemoglobin 10.9.
If you know of a way that it WILL, let us all know. I have never had a version of Word that will work that way. Always puts in the lower case, even though there is a period there.
Are you the one with the ill child ???
If so, please realize that the stress of an ill child can be devastating to a marriage. Unfortunately many men deal with this kind of thing by drinking. My best friend in the world went through 4 yrs of fighting leukemia with her little boy who became ill at 12 months. Her husband turned into a total and complete jerk, drinking, and eventually becoming abusive to her. A major medical illness can pull people apart. On the other hand, it sometimes draws people together, but less often. I had our third child extremely premature and she was critically ill for 2 months and then spent another 2 months in the NICU, 4 months total. It was a big stress, but fortunately we weathered it okay. Some people are not so lucky. My first thought is that all this nonsense with your father, and his mother, and wills and money, and all the rest is just something to fixate on. It may very well NOT be the source of the current friction in your home and your marriage. Maybe some counseling if you can get him to go, would be in order. My best to you and your family.
It's no wonder--with a child like you...
your mother probably ripped her own uterus out, and that will be the one and only post to this person. It was just too easy!!
Why would you do that to your child?
/
New car for my child
My 17-year-old did get a new car for his birthday for several reasons: He has never given us a bad time about anything, he has a 4.2 GPA, and did a 2,210 on his SAT (the new SAT),is headed to the college he had his eye on for several years now (asked for and got early acceptance letter) and he has been working part-time since he was 14 years old.
We decided to get him a new car because he will need it for school (it's a few states away and we want him to have something dependable) and because he has really gone the distance and worked very hard to get to this point.
I'm really not bragging here, these are just our reasons. He didn't get a fancy racing car, just something that is nice and dependable and made us comfortable.
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