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I will be happy to help you. I just returned from sm

Posted By: Just Me on 2007-06-19
In Reply to: Suggestions on memorail for my mom sm - trose

the memorial for my grandmother and uncle who died on the same day back in March. Ya'll may remember me. There was no funeral. My grandmother did not want a funeral but to be cremated, and my uncle was cremated, too, as he died unexpectedly that same night.

Anyways, my aunt set up this gorgeous memorial for the entire family to attend last Sunday. It is approximately 1,400 miles from where we live. She told me the week after they died that she was going to have 2 maple trees profesionally planted on the property - one for my grandmother and one for my uncle. When we all arrived there last week my aunt had spent the past 2 months building a "memorial garden" for the deceased relatives. She had a beautiful bench, the 2 trees planted (my grandmother's cost 350 and my uncle's was 250). They are about 20 yards apart. After the memorial and service, my aunt took some of the ashes and spread them around the base of the trees (my grandmother's ashes on her tree and my uncle's on his). It brought such closure for everyone who attended. It was beautiful and now we will always have a place to go and reflect and "visit" whenever we need to. I plan on going back next year and "visiting" my grandmother and uncle, and look forward to seeing how big their trees have grown. She also planted a few pines - she had about 10 new trees in total. It really was a spectacular little place. She also had 1 tombstone for my grandmother.

Anyways, it is not morbid. I would do a tree because a rose bush will not last that long. And who cares if anyone thinks this is crazy.

In September, some of the family will be traveling to Hawaii to spread the ashes of both my uncle and grandmother in the Pacific ocean since we are all originally from Oahu, Hawaii. My uncle was a deep sea fisherman. I would LOVE to make that trip, but I have a husband and small children and can't afford it right now!

Anyways, you must do what you feel led to do. If it is to plant a tree in her honor, do that. With must deal with death in the way that we need to. Memorials are for the living, not the dead anyway, if you ask me. Good luck. You are NOT alone in making a decision like this.


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I love this. Did it change your life when you returned?
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congratulations!  I hope to be debt free myself one of these days, and once I get out of debt, to be smart enough to stay out! 


 


Enjoy the good feeling that you are getting out of all your hard work! 


***** LOL, that should say I think you CAN be happy... ****

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Moderator


How do we know you are really happy? lol
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Thanks Happy MT...sm

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