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In your opinion, is there a benefit to forcing children to

Posted By: stay in Boy Scouts if they hate it? sm on 2008-07-03
In Reply to:

My son is at camp for a week.  Last night was family night.  He cried and begged me to take him home but my husband and his leaders refused and said it would be  a big mistake. My husband was an Eagle scout and doesn't want to let this go, but my son hates scouting, hates the weekly meetings, the monthly campouts and is miserable.  The places they were sleeping were these three sided buildings with open fronts.   They were full of bugs, spiders, bees, etc.  They did not have a campfire to scare any critters away.  They have see stray cats, racoons, etc. But my son's main issue is having to sleep where there are huge spiders and bees crawling in.  He wasn't the only one.  About half the other boys there in his room (of about 8) cry themselves to sleep every night.  They are not homesick like we are told, they are miserable.  I don't want to be the over-reacting mother, and if there really is value in my son doing this, then fine.  But I don't see it.


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Dairy Queen Blizzards purchased today will benefit the Children's Miracle Network, so
f
Too bad your opinion doesn't apply to children.
LOL 
Should have been benefit...excuse me (nm)
x
You are not paying for a thing that does not benefit you, obviously.
x
Also - Talking to his parents would be of no benefit (sm
His parents do not know how to handle him.  Calling their son names and telling him that his heart is dark are just making things worse.  He might get punished more or yelled at more or cursed at more....that's really gonna help, right?  He doesn't need military school or for anyone to beat the meanness out of him.  I am not a parent who believes in not disciplining their children....I believe in disciplining appropriately though.  If you have witnessed and heard for yourself the things that his parents have said to him, what do you think they must say to him when no one else can hear?  Also, often boys who are large for their age get treated so much more harshly by everyone around them.....suppose he was a teeny tiny little 14-year-old saying the same types of things....would you react exactly the same to him??  Because his mentality is the same as that teeny tiny 14-year-old, just in a bigger body.
You collect widow's benefit's at age 50, not 60, unless you have a child
under 16. I had to stop my benefits for one year and then got them back when I turned 50.
Vote for Hans and benefit Siberian rescue
...Southern Siberian Rescue may win $5,000 in free food from ProPlan. http://www.rallytorescue.com/more_for_pets_voting.aspx Please crosspost and pass this email to any and everyone you know as well!!! I attach a flyer in the event you would like to post at your vets office, your work, local pet stores or anywhere you deem appropriate. :-)

Some of you may remember Hans, the 8 y/o boy we pulled out of Franklin County, NC in August of 2006. He was beat up pretty bad with infected holes in his head and face, teeth hanging horizontally in his mouth, fractured jaw, emaciated, heartworm positive, etc. etc. We did an ebay Auction to raise monies for his medical treatment. Well, Hans was adopted in March to a wonderful couple in Raleigh with a 7 y/o silver and white female Siberian. They just adore him and he is the perfect fit for their family.

We are signed up with ProPlan's Rally to Rescue Program and in February they asked the Ambassadors to submit up to two stories on our rescued pets for their Doing More for Rescued Pets Contest. We submitted Hans' story and they selected him as one of the top 10 finalists. YIPPEE. As a top 10, Southern Siberian Rescue and Hans's adopters win a year of free food for one pet and a 3 day/2 night trip to CA in October for the Rally to Rescue
Ambassador Party, where they will announce the winning pet. They have listed the finalists at http://www.rallytorescue.com/more_for_pets_voting.aspx and voting will go through September 30. Please take a moment and vote for Hans. It only takes a second and costs you nothing. :-) You can submit one vote per email address so if you have multiple email addresses, please vote under each one. The winning pet/rescue will receive $5,000 of free
food and we could really use that food. If you would like to see his transformation pictures you can go to www.southernsiberian.com and his personal website and full story can be seen at http://www.southernsiberian.com/foster_dogs__hans.html.

What a great journey for Hans. It's a true rags to riches story. I can't believe he's a star and going to CA!!!!! He is also a TV star now too as NBC 17 did a story on him June 22. It was a fantastic story. What a great adventure for a boy that had such a rough start.

Thanks.

Dawne
Southern Siberian Rescue

Yeah that's my fear. Trying to give him the benefit of the doubt but (sm)
I don't want to be a dummy either
A spouse can collect widow benefits at age 60, but the benefit is reduced 21% because you took it ea
So, if his benefit is $1000, you would get $790. If you take you retirement at 62, you can keep the widow benefit, or your benefit, whichever is larger. It's worth taking it early because $790 x 24 months (the difference between age 60 and 62) is almost $19,000. My tax lawyer says always take it early.
Children having children not a new thing, where do you live?
My son, who is now in his early 40s, told me years ago when in high school about all the teenage mothers that were at his school and said they brought the babies to school, and he seemed to think it was like the girls having playdolls like when you were little. This is not new and apparently folks think alright to have their children sans marriage, be it preteens, teens or adults. I guess my years alone do not make me shocked at anything anymore. Others talk about this job being isolated and your post says some of this if you were shocked at what the son said.
I should mention that I am 42, have 2 children and done with having children. nm
nm
You must a) not have children or b) your children are young
I don’t see them as being spoiled- I see lots of kids in the age group of one (30+) who are totally in the me scene, not just the 1 I have- she married and her husband same - a me type person. The other not spoiled but just got nasty when he did not get the money left to me and he thought he should. Just to think, this was my chosen 1 if I had to choose. Oh well, live and let live is the way I see things now.
My opinion
I think your husband is probably innocent in this case, but knew that some of the staring people might say something to you.  There are two big reasons you need to keep your cool:  1)  If he really is completely innocent, you don't want to make a big deal out of nothing.  2)  If she is trying to get something started up, you need to pretend to be oblivious or you will never find out.  He may have told you just to let you know that other women are still attracted to him, kind of an ego boost for himself.  I don't think it sounds like anything he intends to pursue - but like the other poster said, you do need to keep an eye on her. 
my opinion

She really sounds like a control freak and a person you should avoid.  Tell her to find playmates for her son his own age.  She has no right to reprimand your son.  I knew a mom like this once - she followed her son around constantly since he was a toddler on up, and he actually grew up with mental deficiencies because she was so over-protective.  Now he's an outcast.  Kids need a little freedom to play and usually they work things out amongst themselves. 


I think you should tell your son to stay away from her and her boy and forget about this woman.  She sounds like a nightmare ! 


Wah, wah, wah! So, I have my opinion, so what?
I just can't bring myself to watch a movie where the girl playing Mary got knocked up at only 16 years old by her 19 year old boyfriend. I gave my opinion, you gave yours. There's no need to jump up my butt about it! Sheesh!
Again, everyone has a right to their opinion.
nm
Just my opinion...
A 12-year-old NO, but a 17-year-old I don't see a problem with it. By that age, it gets hard to keep them in a bubble! And I agree with your husband, they hear it in school and on the streets and more often than not in the home. I am just saying it is out there and it is really hard to keep our kids innocent, although I do try as long as I can, too.
Just my opinion
My parents divorced when I was 13, my dad basically put his new wife ahead and my brother and I and put other women ahead of us after the divorce, extremely hurtful. Every man my mother dated I could not stand. There are times when I do not care for my step dad either, they married when I was 16. It is a very touchy situation and if you are not going to be long term with this guy I would definately not take my daughter on trips with him, this is just from personal experience.
Thank you all so much for your opinion!

get a THIRD opinion.........always.....

My opinion
The thoroughbred racehorse is a genetic mistake. It runs too fast, its frame is too large and its legs are far too small. As long as mankind demands that it run at high speeds under stressful conditions, horses will die at racetracks." (And don't forget that whip in the jockey's hand.) Racehorses are overbred. Those that don't make the cut go straight to auction - a disgusting, heartless place where these beautiful animals are treated like disposable garbage. The immigrant issue is controversial enough without aligning it with a "sport" that should be banned.
well in my opinion
A pretty hot scottish guy! Stars in the new movie coming out soon called 300!!!
in my opinion, i would go to a
board certified plastic surgeon. It's your face, so be careful who you trust. susan
This is just my opinion but I think (sm)
He's being kept on the show, regardless of how the voting turns out (we all know this has GOT to be rigged on the inside SOMEHOW), because of all the buzz he's creating.  This is just my opinion, by I bet we see him stick around until there are only 5 or six left.  They won't let him actually win but they'll keep him long enough to keep everybody tuning in to see what he'll do next week or how bad he'll be.  This is going to be the same scenario as on Dancing With the Stars when P. Miller made it to the final five or six couples.  He, also, was creating buzz for the show.  JMHO
You have your own opinion
I responded since there were so many replies to my original message I thought I would fill you in on the wonderful world of breastfeeding. I am finished, though, because I have other things to take up my time - since my sister fell and broke her hip. Thanks for reading them, and it matters not to me that anyone thinks I am a sicko - I know that my children are the most stable that you would ever meet in this day and time and I will never apologize for that.
In your opinion...
What's the difference between pleasure and happiness?
opinion
I would call the nearest police department to your grandparents and ask them to do a wellfare check - explain that you have not been able to make contact with them. Show your family that you aren't going to stoop to their level and be childish over something so petty.
Another opinion
Why would you name the kid after your stepdad? Why not give it a neutral name? Sounds like you are getting what you deserve. If you didn't do this intentionally to make trouble, you are at the very least superficial and completely discounted their feelings.
My opinion
is go ahead and talk to one another. It is good to have friends and if the people on this board don't want to read it they should not read it. Some people have nothing better to do than put other people down. My mother says some people aren't happy unless they have something to complain about. Have a good day! Hope you have lots to talk about ;-)
my opinion
My husband was acting very similarly and I finally gave him an ultimatum to go talk to his doctor about going on antidepressants. I think men act aggressively when depressed when women tend to withdraw...Long story short, my husband is back and life is so much better!
opinion
Someone wrote in to Dear Abby or someone similar  and had a situation exactly like you describe.  The answer was that the husband should stand up to defend his wife and not let you be humiliated and hurt by this cruelty.  This is really mental abuse on their part.  Shame on your husband for not protecting you from these wenches.  Have you ever spoken to your husband about his lack of action i regard to this?
Opinion - HELP! :)
Okay - I have a dilemma concerning Christmas.  My parents live 4 hours away.  Normally they come down Christmas Day, spend a few hours, and then head back home (can't leave the horses and dog for very long).  Received an email today from my mom that her and dad are coming down Christmas Eve and heading back home Christmas Day.  Here's the dilemma - my husband's family always has their big Christmas on Christmas Eve - huge gathering with food, presents, music, pictures, nieces, nephews, etc.  I have told my parents they are welcome to come with us.  They won't - so now I'm stuck between having my parents sit at home alone while we go to my in-laws, or I stay with them and my husband and kids go without me (and not too happy about it either). HELP!
My opinion
I was in a very similar situation. I've realized over time that my spirit had been broken by that man and my children's spirits were broken as well. We divorced 10 years ago and it's been very difficult. My children have told me recently how glad they were we divorced. Children know what's going on and understand much more than we realize.

Please see a lawyer and get your children and yourself into counseling. It won't be easy, but believe me, you'll never regret it.

JMHO.
Here is my opinion! sm
Paddling, smacking, etc. is for humiliation purposes to make those feel less of a person, tactics used to get kids, teens or others to obey! I, personally, would not want my child humiliated or their self esteem taken away from them by an adult trying to discipline them. Teens have enough peer issues to do that......I would not let my child be "paddled or take swats" by anyone.

Not to say, I wouldn't want to smack my own in the mouth once in a while for talking back....but I choose another route for discipline, like punishing and taking things away that they enjoy.

For what it is worth.....that is my 2 cents!
Need opinion
We have new neighbors, I have not met them.  They work weird schedules according to some other neighbors.  Well they live right next door to us, they just put up a dog pen right on the line of their property and put a really sweet dog in it.  I heard him howling and I went out and talked to him and gave him a piece of bread.  I started thinking I probably should not have given him the bread.  Would that make you mad if it was your dog?  I was really just trying to make the dog feel better but I probably won't do the bread thing again.  Thx. 
2nd opinion?
If you are really worried, I would suggest getting a second opinion. . my irregular bleeding went on a lot until they started me on BCPs. . now it doesn't happen much. . though my doctor did say if it became more frequent, she would want to do an endometrial biopsy. . may be something you should look into. .
my opinion
Don't get into an emotional argurment with your husband, we women usually lose this..............(or at least I do).  I would hire a private investigator, get my proof, and divorce him.  Because obviously he is looking for someone else and does not appreciate who he has now.  Now, if you don't want a divorce, and your husband wants to remain married, get counseling (preferibly Christian counseling) and he has to have a person to give an account to...........if he really wants to remain married to you, he will do ANYTHING to stay with you. If not..............then honestly you are better off without him.  Life is too short for this type of madness.  In my honest opinion, its better to be alone than to look over at a person and wonder why they are with you and is this really where they want to be.  I am not trying to be judgemental, but I learned this the hard way.................... Anyway I wish you the best in life, because EVERY woman deserves to be respected and loved.  Go where you are celebrated girl and not just tolerated!
My opinion
Who is Barack Obama?

Very interesting and something that should be considered in your
choice.

If you do not ever forward anything else, please forward this to all
your contacts...this is very scary to think of what lies ahead of us
here in our own United States...better heed this and pray about it and share it.

We checked this out on "snopes.com". It is factu al. Check for yourself.

Who is Barack Obama?

Probable U. S. presidential candidate, Barack Hussein Obama was born
in Honolulu, Hawaii, to Barack Hussein Obama, Sr., a black MUSLIM
from Nyangoma-Kogel, Kenya and Ann Dunham, a white ATHEIST from Wichita, Kansas.

Obama's parents met at the University of Hawaii. When Obama was two
years old, his parents divorced. Hi s father returned to Kenya. His
mother then married Lolo Soetoro, a RADICAL Muslim from Indonesia.?
When Obama was 6 years old, the family relocate to Indonesia. Obama
attended a MUSLIM school in Jakarta. He also spent two years in a
Catholic school.

Obama takes great care to conceal the fact that he is a Muslim. He is
quick to point out that, "He was once a Muslim, but that he also
attended Catholic school."

Obama's political handlers are attempting to make it appear that
that he is not a radical.

Obama's introduction to Islam came via his father, and that this
influence was temporary at best. In reality, the senior Obama returned
to Kenya soon after the divorce, and never again had any direct
influence over his son's education.

Lolo Soetoro, the second husband of Obama's mother, Ann Dunham,
introduced his stepson to Islam. Obama was enrolled in a Wahabi school in Jakarta.

Wahabism is the RADICAL teaching that is followed by the Muslim
terrorists who are now waging Jihad against the western world . Since
it is politically expedient to be a CHRISTIAN when seeking major
public office in the United States, Barack Hussein Obama has joined
the United Church of Christ in an attempt to downplay his Muslim
background.
ALSO, keep in mind that when he was sworn into office he
DID NOT use the Holy Bible, but instead the Koran.

Barack Hussein Obama will NOT recite the Pledge of Allegiance nor
will he show any reverence for our flag. While others place their hands
over their hearts, Obama turns his back to the flag and slouches.

Let us all remain alert concerning Obama's expected presidential
candidacy.

The Muslims have said they plan on destroying the US from the inside out, what better way to start than at the highest level - through the President of the United States, one of their own!!!!
need opinion please. sm
Has anyone had a problem before with their husband wanting to spend all their time with one of their friends.  I mean ALL their time to the extent of getting up in the morning and going there when not working and staying all day.  Until bed time.  My husband is a truckdriver and he has this friend around here that doesn't live too far from us who he just seems to have to spend every waking moment with.  I mean every time he has a few days that he is in from driving if this friend is at home he goes over there.  Well the friend is single and of course my husband never invites me so I basically just don't get to see him.  He will take my son with him but not me.  It is like the guy place.  It is fine for him to go spend time with his friend but let me give an example of how much time he spends.  Okay he come in off of his truck yesterday.  He came home yesterday afternoon after about 4 pm.  Well we had to dip his hunting beagles for fleas and such and feed them and spent some time outside.  Well as soon as all that is done he doesn't even come inside he says I am going ride to Bouie's.  Well I was like you just got in not too long ago.  He said well  I want to ride to Bouie's.  I said well take us with you.  (Me and my son)  He acted like he didn't want to so I said Ok whatever go ahead.  Well that was about 6 pm.  He didn't come home till 10 pm.  I can call over there or pass by and he really is there he isn't lying and going somewhere else.  Ok this morning he said he was going rabbit hunting with this friend.  They left really early about 5 am.  I said how long do you think you will hunt?  He says oh no longer than midmorning.  Well he didn't get home until 5 that evening.  I said boy did ya'll hunt all that time?  He said well we hunted until this afternoon and then he decided to go to his brothers to visit.  Came home like I said at 5 pm.  He came in and told me all about his hunting trip and sit there then at 6 pm he says I am going back to Bouie's to go with him to get his 4-wheeler (it was about an hour away).  I said Oh my gosh you just came home from being with him all day.  He said well we are going to go get his 4-wheeler so we can take it hunting when we go in the morning again.  I said can't he go on his own to get it do you have to go.  He said well I want to ride with him.  I got mad and said whatever.  I said all you ever want to do is spend your time with Bouie.  And he said ok bye and left.  That was about 6 and it is 9:30 pm and he isn't back yet and I am just at a loss here.  I don't know why he chooses to spend all his time with his friend instead of some of it with his wife.  I think I am going to sit him down and tell him that this is starting to be a problem.  I mean this is everytime he comes in off the road.  Any advice on how to solve this problem?  Anyone been in this situation before?  Any advice is appreciated. 
My opinion
I didn't care for the old owner and won't be visiting her new site.  I can't figure out why people liked her. 
Everyone has own opinion. My is, it
nm
Maybe in your opinion, but maybe not others.
You know that button that says report message? What do you think it's for?
My opinion . . . sm
THIS IS JUST MY OPINION -- NOT A JUDGMENT!

I think y'all probably got into this marriage way too fast, especially with a child involved.

At this point, if you want to salvage the relationship, DEMAND the 3 of you (and possibly the ex) get into family therapy. Y'all are not going to be able to fix these problems on your own.

If DH refuses to consider therapy, you need to consider getting out. I personally don't see things going well if y'all don't get help.

His temper scares me too and he has blinders on. I can understand that he loves his kid and doesn't want to put him thru more stress (i am a divorced mother of 2 with a new husband too), but he is bending over backwards so much that his behavior is going to cause lasting problems in that child.

Good luck!
My opinion...

I disagree with you.  The child is deliberately being nasty.  His father should correct him and teach him not to talk to other human beings that way.  And why did you say she was some weird lady?  Of course he is going to be jealous of her, but she is not some weird lady, she is the wife of his daddy and he should be nice to her. 


To the OP,  respond to his taunts very sweetly and redirect him, for example, "Oh, you got a slushie, yum!  Your daddy makes good slushies doesn't he?  I'm glad you two are having fun!"  Then give him a smile and walk away.  That will help him see that you two are not in a competition. 


 


My opinion, No.
Go with your gut on this one.
What is your opinion of this?

The scenario is...a husband and wife who are limited financially. The husband is between jobs but gets a small unemployment payment each week. The wife works every day. They are driving somewhere and stop to get gas in their car and she asks him how much he is going to put in. He says ten dollars. She hands him $20 and tells him not to just get $10, but to go ahead and put more in, then she thinks about it and hands him $10 more and says "just go ahead and get $40, and maybe it will last us through the week".


He goes to the pump and pumps in $30!! Because she was looking at the gas pump to see if he was about finished and ready to go, she sees that he only pumped in $30. When he gets in the car, he doesn't say anything to her about the amount he got, and as he starts to leave the station he notices that she is angry! He realizes why and starts to tell her that he decided to keep the $10 to put gas in HIS car at home a little bit later.


She feels like he cheated her in some way by taking the 30 and using it, but saving his own 10 (no matter what the reason) because when they originally pulled up to the gas station, he was planning to use the 10 he had and nothing more, yet after she voluntarily offered him the 30, he didn't use his 10 at all, and didn't even tell her that he was going to do it that way.


This has caused a really big fight between them that she says is rocking their marriage. They are at the point of not speaking to each other over this!


What is your opinion about this story?


btw, this isn't me and DH  it's a lady I talk to on another forum


(some back ground information on him...he is notorious for getting 5 and 10 dollars worth of gas at a time, and having to keep stopping for gas many times because that much just doesn't go very far. He has been known to go to the gas station 8-10 times on a weekend, just to get "a few dollars worth"! She gets really upset with him for doing it this way and says that he should take the total amount that he will be getting in small increments and put that whole amount in at once. She says it will go further)


my opinion
My daughters are in their earlier 20s but incidents like this is still familiar.  I have called parents and it just made it worse. The parents know what happened since the school called them.   See what the school does first.  Ask to have your son's seat changed.  Yes you should have been called but at least they thought what the little girl did warranted a phone call home and did not ignore it. The school may be giving warnings to the parents of this little girl. 
Thanks for your opinion.
Thankfully, it is not my kid I'm talking about, but my cousin's daughter.  There are a couple of other very troubling things on her MySpace.  I contacted my cousin and asked her if she had seen her daughter's MySpace and she said she had not, but if there was something disturbing she wanted to know about it.  I gave her my daughter's signon and password so she could see her daugher's page (her daughter had added my daughter as a friend). 
My Opinion
I think there comes a time when exchanging gifts between adults is not necessary.  I would just buy for the little kids if I were you.  That's what we do in our family.
Yes, I did (and still do) want your opinion
Thank you for posting!

I did not expect that everyone would agree with me. As an MT, I respect the thoughts and feelings of my fellow MTs and enjoy many of the discussions on this board, both those relating to the medical field and otherwise. I was really hoping for more of a response, from either side of the issue.

There is a pill form (synthetic THC) called Marinol, but from what I understand it is not as effective and/or has adverse side effects (I know, smoking it has adverse side effects too). I have also heard about the possibility of vaporizing it rather than smoking it, but I don't know a lot about how that compares.

There have been some studies done in regards to driver impairment issue and, to a degree, I believe that it has been found much safer than driving under the influence of alcohol. Apparently pot smokers tend to slow down and drive more carefully, whereas drunk folks oftentimes don't even realize that they drove under the influence until they are later informed of it or wake up in jail. When I say "to a degree", I believe there has been some delayed reaction or other adverse findings associated with a significantly high level in the blood.

I know I have a lot more to say about this, but just realized I have to leave in four minutes to pick up my son and I am not ready to go, but thanks again for posting!
My opinion......s/m
It was ok to go to the funeral.
But as it caused so much drama, I think it is better for you and your husband to cut contact with all of his ex's family.