My son had this problem (sm)
Posted By: Backwards typist on 2008-10-10
In Reply to: How do you handle being jealous of stepkids? - anon
He married a woman with a daughter. This daughter did everything she could to break up the marriage.Her mother let the kid walk all over them and generally, when son tried so hard to be the father she never had, but if he tried to discipline her, she would always say, "You're not my father and I don't have to listen to you." Her mother always stood up for her as if the kid never did anything wrong, and always telling him, "Go easy. She never had a father." What the heck did my son try to do? Just be a money pit for her and his wife???? Yep, that's all he was. She destroyed 5 cars in 1 year through accidents and when he wouldn't allow her to drive any more cars, it was the final blow. After hanging on for 10 years, this year was the final breakup over her. They are now getting a divorce. The kid is now 19 and now, every time she fights with her mother, she comes running to him.I call her very ungrateful and a few words I can't list here. I told him to stay away from her before mom and daughter start accusing him of something.
And to answer your question, you have the right to feel the way you do, but don't let it go on much longer or else you'll lose control of the whole situation. Have a sit-down with him and if he doesn't see your point of view, try counseling. There's no way a father should be sleeping with a 9-year-old and there's no way a 9-year-old should have the PARENT under her control. That's a recipe for disaster. His excuse does not hold water.
Good luck.
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