My take...

Posted By: allkeyedup on 2008-12-17
In Reply to: Is this an abusive marriage or not? (sm) - anon

is that you know him better than we do. I was dealing with someone very narcissistic but was afraid of him, so I played on his disease to get him to want out. It kept me from having to worry about looking over my shoulder in fear. By knowing his personality traits, I was able to work him out of my life safely. I pray you take in all the advice you can; but, in the end, you need to do what you think is best. Your life will be so much better. God bless you, dear.

Complete Discussion Below:

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Is this an abusive marriage or not? (sm) - anon
- I don't why people don't talk about this... - sm
- he sounds immature, and nuts. - quietly take kid and leave. nm
- Men that hit do not change... - phillygal
- Perhaps I'm playing devil's advocate or maybe I need a - Reality Check
  - In her defense, it sounds like people she knows haven't been of any help. sm - Confetti
- I'm wondering if you've tried - sm
- My take... - allkeyedup
- For the sake of your son and your - Been there
- I'm sorry but this is a - nobrainer...sm
  - What's funny is that for a long time I did not realize it was all abuse (sm) - anon
    - You know, I can believe that... - good men/bad men...sm
- I am NOT even going to ask sm - MT 35 years
- leave - ky/mt
- Just a shot in the dark here, but - truffle
- Please be careful - mommyof3littlegremlins
- National Domestic Violence Website and phone #... - clemmie
- Thanks to everyone who replied. I am sorry to know that (sm) - anon
  - Have you questioned the no sex rule? - ...
    - sorry, you got me on a roll (sm) - anon
      - no but i also don't stay married to someone who treats me like dirt - ...
        I understand that, but when you deal with a person like this (sm) - anon
        how are you protecting your sm - wondering
        Because he is trying to get 50% custody (sm) - anon
        did it cross your mind that if sm - wondering
        Yes it has all crossed my mind. Have you been in this situation before? (sm) - anon
        been there, walked out and sm - wondering
        If that true, you've got some real aftermath issues - sm
        Interesting - you insult me but you are not going to answer me? (sm) - anon
        it just gets better and better, I sm - wondering
        Not trying to reconcile. Trying to get witnesses (sm) - anon
        church is a coverup for sm - wondering
        This reminds me of.... - sm
        FOR THE LOVE OF MIKE - GIVE HER A BREAK - SM - Solamente
        for the love of Mike Rowe? - yes
        because she has been sm - wondering
        You are still full of rage. - sm
        keep analyzing and she will sm - wondering
        Yes. I did the same. The only thing different - sm
        if this woman keeps subjecting sm - wondering
        I know it sounds dumb, but this is the truth (sm) - anon
        You don't sound dumb at all, only like - sm
        He hasn't hit my child in 8 years, because (sm) - anon
        No way this person has had direct experience. - sm
        that's where you are wrong. Read sm - wondering
        Since when have belittling and scare tactics - sm
        I know someone who went the route you are saying (sm) - anon
        Good grief, they deserve a safe sm - wondering
    - Even if I was to try to overcome my lack of desire for him (sm) - anon
      - No offense, but this is a no-brainer - Captain Anesthesia
    - Not sure what you mean? (sm) - anon
      - Oh sweetie, I just have tears in my eyes for you - sm - Solamente
        Yes, leave and move to another state if possible, at least don't stay in the same town - suprmommy3
      - next time you wake up, tell him you stuck - ...
- it's abuse duh - nm
  - How rude ! - Anoni mouse
    - why not just ignore my post and be on yours - nm
      - May I introduce you to my husband? I think you would get along (sm) - anon
        why fly back at someone sm - wondering
        maybe it was 1958 when the cop told her this? - just a thought
        very funny! 50 years ago sm - wondering
        ...umm...no...i wasn't alive in 1958 - just a thought
        yeah well I was three years old sm - wondering
        it was about 3 years ago and if I can turn him in I want to (sm) - anon
        now you are making sense! sm - wondering
        no thank you, i don't want him - nm
        He probably wouldn't want you either. - nm
        this saddens me - to think that some jerks wouldn't want me - well boo hoo - i have higher standards
        Don't kid yourself. If you had any class at all, - sm
        maybe i have no class - sm
        No you wouldn't. But some women would. The PTA president last night (sm) - anon
        then you should definitely let the PTA woman have him - sm
        Maybe not, but you sure deserve him. - Birds of a feather
- Let me clearly state that this is abuse on many levels. - sm
  - Thanks for your encouragement (sm) - anon
- what is - normal
  - TO: What is...normal - westcoastMT
  - What is YOUR problem? - MQQA
    - prayers and doers - normal
      - If receiving anonymous help, prayers, - sm
        this does not make any sense to me - normal
        Don't think this is consensus seeking. - sm
        Thank you so much! It really, really helps to know someone gets it (sm) - anon
  - And I have not asked you to be on my side (sm) - anon
  - I am not painting anything. Apparently you have no life experience (sm) - anon
- Pardon the bluntness, but you need to get out... - phillygal
  - I agree she needs to get out but disagree with your reasoning - sm - Solamente
    - I am afraid it would just infuriate him (sm) - anon
    - Restraining orders also depend on - phillygal
- You need to get your son into s/m - MI-MT
- husband - MT
  - A few things . . . what state do you live in? - OldMT

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