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You're right. I shouldn't

Posted By: country MT on 2007-10-18
In Reply to: Don't lie..different approach - toomuchfun!

tell him it will be a long time before I die. I was just trying to comfort him. We have also talked about how everybody will die when God decides it is their time. We are regular church members. He has been raised in church and knows all that, I guess it's just now really sinking in. My husband will take care of my kids if I die. As far as if we both die, we have that taken care of also. We were married 18 years before we had them. They are definitely God's little miracles to us! I'm sorry for your loss, but you're right; you will see him again someday and I'm sure he has never left your heart! God Bless you and thank you for your kind advice.


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Maybe you shouldn't take any.
Curious as to why you listed biracial up there. What does that have to do with anything?

It doesn't sound like you really want any of them. Maybe foster care where someone wants to take of them would be a better place.
so therefore, i shouldn't have this cat and should get right of it
x
They shouldn't be treated the same
A 15yo and an 8yo should not be treated equally anyway. If the 15yo wants what the 8yo wants, tell him/her they can have the same bedtime, curfew, privileges etc. if they want everything to be fair.
Shouldn't I have a better self-definition by now?? sm
I am up early, not sure if this will interest anyone, but want to sort of wonder "out loud" on here for a moment.  I am 40 years old, yet I still am ambivalent about my religious beliefs, my political beliefs, etc.  I find myself not being steadfast either way...I don't know if that means I don't yet know who I am (though by now you would think I should!) or if that means that I am just always going to be a flexible thinker? I sometimes read posts on the liberal board and the conservative board and I can always see both points of view and find ways that I feel they are both right and sometimes both wrong so I never lean to far to either side.  I grew up going to a Christian church and I believe in the general overall beliefs of Christians, but then I don't discredit other religions that others grew up with either.  And I don't necessarily agree with everything that most mainstream Christians believe.  Does all of this mean I am ignorant?  Or is it ignorant to be too closed-minded to believe that others also have valid points of view, that I don't always have to be right, and that there is more than one way to be "right"?  So sometimes I feel "undefined" and wonder how I can ever define myself...then other times I think I have defined myself exactly as I want to be.  Does anyone else feel "undefined"? and is it a good thing or a bad thing?
What amazes me, though it probably shouldn't

is the number of people on this thread bashing someone for doing things right, when anon up above just suggests the OP file bankruptcy.  What's wrong with you people?  You think it's okay to just turn your back on the mess you've created?  Not one of you commented on that poster's suggestion, yet you waste your time bashing someone who does have their act together.  I would rather have PhillyChick in my corner anyday over anyone who thinks it's okay to just rack up debt and walk away.  You people need to get your heads checked.


Before you say it, this has nothing to do with whether the OP has extenuating circumstances or not.  The OP wasn't even asking about bankruptcy.  The OP was asking for suggestions on how to pay things back, and for that, I applaud her. 


well it shouldn't be. She should at least get to get a second opinion (sm)
I think she is being diagnosed to easily with something that can stay on her medical record and that is so unfair.
Maybe because no one has said to them they SHOULDN'T wear it...
nothing uglier than muffin top under too tight shirts, fat thighs in too tight jeans, sucking down an soda and eating a burger. Some people need to look in a mirror, or better yet, shop at a real department store, spend some money on good quality clothing, stop trying to dress like a teenager, and bring along a friend who will tell you how you REALLY look in the clothes you try on.
shouldn't this be on the WAHM board?
just wondering why pregnancy, potty training etc questions are not being re routed to the WAHM board? Otherwise, what is that board for? just a question, not a criticism.
Well, she shouldn't have married him...that never works.
x
It shouldn't matter. Of all the couples I know currently, (sm)
only ONE is same-race. The rest are white/black, black/Pacific Islander, Asian/white, etc. And the only same-race couple I know is gay. So no, it shouldn't matter in the slightest.
You shouldn't be so judgmental and nasty
without knowing all the facts. News flash: Life isn't always black and white, cut and dried. Try to put yourself in her shoes and not be so critical because you don't know any of the details of what's going on. Jeesh.
he shouldn't even ask-it's too obvious and classless

again, just my own *take* on the situation...betcha these people always get called by virtual strangers or acquaintenances to stay with them while the guests do Disney Parks.....living in Orlando and all that....


it reeks of using them.....just to stay there.....


Bad taste, to say the very least.


But, shouldn't this be on the RELIGION Board?? nm
x
Shouldn't teenagers at least have at home ....sm
a CLEAN environment?

Shouldn't this really be on the Politics board? sm
you are labeling global warming science as rotten, and basically making remarks about Obama that pretty much should be noted on the politics board, not GAB.
She's your mother. There shouldn't be "boundaries."

One day, your mother will be gone and you will look back on this vacation as time you missed and your children missed out on with her.


I'm very close with my mother.  She's my rock.  The one person I know I can always count on if ever I or my children need anything.  My dad passed away at age 49 and both my parents instilled a strong sense of family on my brother and sister and I.  Blood is blood.  We should always "do" for family.


Yes, my mom gives me unsolicited advice, yes she has irritated me repeatedly over the years, yes we've had our spats and cold wars, and yes she has intruded in my home and turned her nose up at my housekeeping abilities.  But in the end she's my mother.  She's earned the right to give me unsolicited advice and she's always welcome in my home.  And of course I don't do things as well as she did, she was a career housewife.  I haven't had the luxury.  But she does what most mothers do and what I will do someday, I'm sure.


Just tell you mom to bring her own spending money and let her know that maybe she and your dad she get their own hotel room because there are far too many people for just one room.  You may even be able to have one or two of your kids sleep in their room.  It might work nice for you.  You and your hubbie maybe could leave the kids with your parents one night at the hotel with your parents at the pool or something and go out on a date.


Or maybe tell her you think it's great she go and she can help you with the kids and give you some alone time on your trip.  She may decide she doesn't want to go afterall and then everything works out the way everyone wants.


You shouldn't feel responsible....

As mean as it sounds, you have put up with it and YOU have decided for yourself that enough is enough and if you tell him so and IF he bounces back to alcoholism, then basically he is a grown man and that is HIS choice, you cannot let it affect you or make you feel responsible.


My sister-in-law is in the same boat as far as her husband being an alcoholic.  It has put so much stress on her and their children and it has been going on about 15 years.  He won't seek help though and she won't leave him.  She just says that she is hoping one day he wakes up and sees what a good wife she is.  I feel bad for her that she has wasted so much time on someone like that.


my thought is that it shouldn't even be called
'assisted suicide', it should be called 'facilitating a less painful transition.'
If the terminally ill patient himself and the doctors agree to stop the pain and suffering, then definitely, yes.
Then she shouldn't post here if she doesn't want

with someone telling her to get up off her butt and look for a job?  It takes two months to realize you aren't making enough money?


I feel more sorry for someone who experiences a true tragedy.  Not someone who sits around and waits for the crap to hit the fan. 


She needs to read some of the recommendations here and do something.


It is better than nothing.   


All the kids should pitch in to hire help. Shouldn't all be on
:P
It shouldn't matter, but in this imperfect world
it upsets a lot of people - who ought to be minding their own business.

I asked my mother about marrying outside your race when I was young, and she replied that marriage was difficult enough that you should look for somebody you have things in common with, and religion and race are 2 biggies.

I have been married for 20 years, so I haven't had to think about it for quite a while though.
You shouldn't feel this way so early in your marriage (sm)
Take it from someone who stuck around way too long and now has a much more complicated situation (children and money involved) - cut your losses now and find someone you are a better match with. It has nothing to do with your weight. Your husband should be treating you with lots of love and attention right now in your marriage...if not, something is wrong. You can find someone else who would be a better match for you. Don't wait until there are children and finances and so many other complicating factors keeping you there!! However things are at the beginning of a marriage, they will only get worse as time goes on. I know it is hard, I know you love him, but it is not going to work. Again, cut your losses now, and move on to a better future!
See what this board has come to? Blurry or not that shouldn't be posted.
p
You shouldn't feel guilty because (see message)
you can't be really sure that is what she would have wanted. When my cat died, many years ago, she went away to be by herself when she died. We had to look for her to find her. Some animals just prefer to be alone. You spent time with her before she died, and then you made her comfortable. Perhaps it was easier for her to "leave" if you weren't there with her. I am so sorry for your loss.
But these are kids; they shouldn't have to fight at a young age nm
:)
Silly Girl shouldn't have to treat her
husband like a dog or a child.  After all, she is his wife, not his mother.  If she wants a pet, she can go to the animal shelter and get a dog.  She married a man and he needs to act like one.  It sounds like she gives and gives, and he takes.  I think Silly Girl should start taking care of herself for a change.
It shouldn't be about wearing a ring, but more...see message
the way he acted toward you. My husband doesn't wear his wedding ring, just cos he doesn't feel like it, and I don't wear mine either. No big deal, but sounds like this guy was flirting with you and that's what I think was wrong.
ARRGH, I knew I shouldn't have opened up this sm

discussion.  I was working, and was going to watch whenever I had time (love DVR), but I just had to peak, lol.  Oh well, of course, I am still going to watch it


 


Definitely understand that - you shouldn't have to have your property be forever a memorial! (sm)
you were VERY kind to leave it there and take care of it for six months. So ridiculous that people gave you a hard time. I'm sorry that happened to you! Bad enough that you have to know something so awful happened in front of your home without a constant reminder and strangers coming up to your house all the time. And it is not your job to maintain it for them. If the family understood, then certainly no one else should have any say whatsoever.
I did my taxes in February, no reason why $ shouldn't be here today
:(
Shouldn't this be moved to the Weight Loss board?

No, west coasters shouldn't have to wait to come to this board. Again, do not post
If you feel that you must post, post something in the subject line that there is spoiler information on the inside of the post then make your post inside so those who don't want to know will know not to open your post.
I see ads in our paper and phone books for "stagers" all the time now. Shouldn't be
s
it's not illegal, but it's inappropriate & he shouldn't be allowed to teach anymore
x
Guess talking with dying aunt over daughter just shouldn’t happen
Yes I did say disconnect (have thought about that for some time just due to the excessive amount spent on land phone though and daughter suggested disconnecting also to save $$$) the fuss was the fact about others assumming something. I took what I considered to be the more important of the 2 calls- basically I talk with the daughter every week several times and the aunt - well what would most do?
You're not 'low-class', you're FUNNY, & a good writer!
Which is often the case then someone is the first to cast stones!
You're surprised? I'm not. They're not going to stop voting....
as was mentioned in a prior post. Imagine if they succeed? They just may.
At least you wait until they're cooked! LOL...we're raw dough
s
Sounds like you're doing great! We're also making out...sm
daughter pay for gas and insurance when she starts driving. She hasn't started driving yet because she doesn't want to get a job to pay for that privilege. That's her choice. We're also making her pay 1/2 of the fees for the state required driver's education course.
Things you're afraid of vs. things you're not
I didn't used to be afraid of spiders, but I seem to have developed a fear of those little beasties. I also can't stand boats, water deeper than my hot tub and bridges. I'm also fairly convinced that UFOs, if not aliens (well, isn't anything driving those things?) are real, so that kinda scares me, yet it is strangely fascinating. I'm also afraid of El Chupacabra, though I'm very certain that's not real. It's one of those "hahahahaha" fears. 

Things other people fear that I do not include snakes (awwww, they so cute! they look like they're smiling!), rats, gangbangers (except Mara Salvatrucha, move them up to my "scary" list), poverty, death, traveling at high rates of speed with almost anyone sober, bats (CUTE!!!!!), homeless people, Sasquatch, most of my male friends, bears, mountain lions. 


Fear is such an odd thing, don't you think? So much of it is relative to our own experiences in life, yet at the same time some of them are downright irrational. 


So, how 'bout you? What will send  you running screaming in the other direction, and what things can you take care of when someone else goes running screaming in the other direction?


you're welcome. nm
nm
I see what you're saying...but
heaven forbid, they break up and one of them dies, wouldn't you want the same thing. If she were to die, wouldn't she want her husband to have the same choice she is wanting??? I guess I'm just concerned with pushing this on the husband and he doesn't want to do it. I hope it all works out though. This is a hard decision to make.
You're welcome!
I hope you can come up with something, I've "been there and done that".
Should be you're not, not your not
and actually in the minority as I do work a full 8 hour day, no chasing after kids, walking the dogs, doing housework so you got it exactly right, in the minority as opposed to a lot I read about on here.
Aww, sorry you're going through that...sm
My husband can get into moods also, but I honestly won't allow him to talk to me like that. In every relationship I've ever been in, I wouldn't allow it. In the beginning when I was pregnant with our second child, I wrote him a long letter telling him I needed more help and would not accept anything less. I was so stressed out with working at home and taking care of a 2-year-old and being pregnant. That was it! Ever since then, I swear he does more than me! If he talks to me in a certain way, I demand an apology and I get it, not always right then, but a little later. He knows I won't take it. We've been together for 15 years now, and that is a big thing in keeping us strong. He doesn't take my crap, either:-) He's still my best friend so it's worth it to make it work. Stand up to him and make him respect you! I say that with much care.
Because you're mom, LOL.
Moms just know these things.
We're all in this together ...

I think.  It's always reassuring for me to know that other people are dealing with the same stuff I am. 


She was furious when she found out I had gone through her purse, but too bad.  You live in my house, you live by my rules, sweetheart. 


Another thing that gets me is where she was getting the stinkin' things anyway.  She works in a restaurant where her coworkers smoke but I hope they would know better to get them for a minor.  As far as I know, she hasn't started up again.


 


you're welcome--sm
a lot of physicians are almost insistent on someone taking the synthroid, and it makes me wonder how much stock they have purchased with the manufacturer. They always try to say we don't need the T3 that is included in the Armour, but I know I feel a whole lot better with taking it. I didn't even know I had a thyroid problem until I went to a doc with flu like symptoms and wanting to sleep 14 hours a day. I saw a doc from India in an urgent care clinic, who I had never seen before. I was hardly in the door yet and he said *how long have you had that goiter?* I was stunned. I had seen so many doc's in between and none of them ever picked up on this. I was on synthroid for five years, and never really felt much difference. I read up on thyroid problems from all sorts of web sites and decided to try the armour. Unfortunately my doc at that time would not prescribe it for me. HE did not believe it in. *hmmmm*. I had to go to an endocrinologist, as well, and still had to BEG to try it. He reluctantly gave it to me and it took a while to get it up to the level that would even out my TSH levels, but I am now at 120 mg and seem to be holding. I do feel better, but as I said earlier, I still battle with weight loss/gain. but every body is different. stick to your guns, get what you want, and check back in three months or so and let me know how you are feeling/doing. email me if you wish.
If that's what they're doing ...
it's fine with me. I thought it was interesting, but different that we suddenly focused on 2 characters I didn't remember. But there they were in scenes from the past that I did remember, LOL.
No, we're not out there saying come on
But by nature cats do roam. We have a big field in our back yard and he only goes out early in the morning and goes through the brush. He comes up on them when they fly up and he will jump straight up after them. I have gotten many away from him simply because the first thing he does is bring them to the back door, but when he meows to be let in, they fly away. My husband and I certainly aren't thrilled about it, especially during the springtime, but cats do go after birds and the big old hawks flying around our house could easily scoop up our tiny little female kitty, and I suppose that would make it even?
You're right

Trying to leave while he is there, especially in the middle of an argument, is a gesture, not a serious attempt at leaving. All it does is make him angry and more vigilant.


And you're right that even the best organization can't guarantee complete safety. But they can offer shelter, advice, compassion, and some safety. It's better than trying to do it on your own.


I'm sorry if you have been in this situation before. No one should have to go through that. But unfortunately, many, many women do, every day.