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You sound like a very caring and kind person

Posted By: see message on 2006-12-27
In Reply to: So Sad this Christmas - SoBlue

I'm definitely not going to flame you, but I'm wondering if you actually put stuff *inside* the mailbox because that is against the law. I would appreciate the thought, but I really wouldn't like someone going in my mailbox besides my mail carrier.

My neighbors across the street have the most beautiful lights. I just moved here from the sticks and it was SO cool to be able to look outside my window every night and look at their array. I don't see them because our schedules are different, so I thought about mailing them a thank you card. But it really would not be appropriate to just pop it in the box.

Anyhow, please don't take offense, but maybe some of the looks you are getting is the mailbox thing. I'm not assuming or anything, just wanted to give you a heads up.

I sincerely hope you feel better :-)


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Thanks for being a caring person. Please don't change.-nm
xx
You are a caring, loving person. That has been obvious SM
from your posts for a long time to me. You are doing the right thing and staying on top of this. With your close eye and caring and with professionals on board I think your son has a bright future. Keep us informed.
You sound like a wonderful person. Really. SM
What is needed is responsible pet ownership. Not so many strays. It breaks my heart.

Bless you.
Yes I am THAT kind of person.
I had to give up the kids because the dogs were allergic.
You are truly a kind person.
nm
You sound like a very wise person and I a glad to that
he did understand.  Over-the-top is never good.  Not for an adult and certainly not for a child.  A gift with meaning and purpose is more cherished than a trunk load of junk and will be remembered, not thrown away. 
this person sounds mentally ill....you sound
nm
Ya'll are just too kind and sweet. I am having a hard time thinking "I'm the better person&
all of this. Thank you for your support. You are exactly right. She doesn't want to "make nice" with me. She is feeding on my vulnerabilities. I can't believe she can live with herself like that. Poor thing. My husband and I got into the biggest fight yesterday because I refused dto go to his mothers house. I went and she was not there! Thank God! It worked out well and I had a very nice time. My husband does not understand my pain and not wanting to be around her.....

I "feed" on positivity and niceness. I love nice, sweet people and can't, for a second, be around meanness. A lot of it has to do with my upbringing...

Ya'll are great and I appreciate you so much. Thanks!
Thank you for caring for that poor dog. sm
She must have been neglected for a long time.

With her coughing up mucus, she probably has pneumonia and needs antibiotics. She also needs dental work.

You might want to feed her some ground beef and rice. You should boil the beef, not fry it (no seasonings)and add it to cooked rice that has no seasonings. This is what my vet prescribed when one of my dogs was sick. It should be easy for her to eat this. But please get her to a vet ASAP.

She probably has some kind of allergy that is causing her to chew herself. Or she might be doing that because her teeth hurt her.


Thanks for caring so much and for passing that along! NM

thank you all for the advice and caring.....sm
I knew I was doing the right thing posting here. All of the MTs I have spoken to on this site have been really kind.

I found out about the cheating when the other woman's husband called our house last night, and my husband told me first thing this morning so that I could hear it from him instead of the other guy. I have since talked to the other husband and the wife says that my husband wanted it to go further, but she stopped it. I think she is just trying to save her a@@. The other husband read some e-mails to me that they had passed back and forth together, and it sounds to me like there was more going on. I also called my cell phone company today to get the past few months details on his phone so I can see just how much they were talking. My husband said they didn't really talk that often (the CSR checked through the records and found multiple calls on multiple days. She was very nice, helpful, and encouraging).

We have 2 small children (4½ and 2½ girls) and I feel like I owe it to them to try and find a way to work through this. He has agreed to counseling, but I don't know at this point how I want this all to turn out. I'm still just too numb, shocked, angry, etc. to have thought it out that far.

Thanks again for all of your advice and opinions. There is a lot to be learned from other peoples experiences. Just pray for strength for me to get through the holidays without having a nervous breakdown or a murder charge.
God bless you for caring sm
We have kept our dogs for up to 16-17, until it would have been inhumane to let them suffer, so I can feel your pain. I cried more over my dogs than I did for family as the first one was born right here in our home as well and we treat our animals as one of us. Unless one is an animal lover, others cannot understand why you could be so heartbroken. My husband took it hard as well and we were both so distraught it was worse than a human death. We had ignorant people say ignorant things such as, "it's only a dog," etc. Be comforted in knowing that those of us who love animals feel your pain. It will take a long time to get over. I could not walk past the pet food aisle without tears. The only answer to my pain was guess what? Another pet if possible. Bless you, we are here to talk. Those of us who love animals know what you've been through. You feel helpless, I'm sure, but you did your best.
Thank you for caring. It means a lot.
ss
Thank you all for caring. I have an appointment on
Thursday to see a Christian psychologist at a local church.  I have been thinking of attending this church for some time, and when I have my appointment it might be a foot in the door so to speak.  Thank you again for your kind words.  My post was just another way of reaching out.  When I get terribly depressed I tend to internalize everything and avoid people.  I really need to sit down with someone and just unload.  I think this is a step in the right direction. 
Bless your heart for caring!
t
Anyone here caring for aging parents?

Whoof. This is so very hard. My mother is/was a brilliant educator, highly respected in her field.


We are walking a very thin line these days. I just hate it, and I do not use that word often.


We have found an assisted living facility that she likes, and I do as well. But, she is not liking the fact that she must decide. Oh, it is so very hard.


She was quite ill back in the summer, went to a nursing home for therapy (to recover from pneumonia), and then home. She is failing, and not going "gentle into that good night." She wants so very much to live on her own, but it is such a struggle. I am afraid for her, and I am so very tired.


Is anyone else living with this? If so, what do you do? I have read a thousand articles, talked with so many specialists, and still am lost.


I can't thank you all enough for your support, information, and caring..sm
You have really uplifted me a bit, and we will continue to search for answers and pray to do the right thing.  She is so loved!!  And God Bless each and every one of you, and your loved ones, for your kind notes and posts, SO APPRECIATED!!!
but short on compassion and caring.
x
The woman has children who are supposed to be caring for her
Interfering could lead to some seriously unpleasant unintended consequences.
I had that problem with a neighbor, only they weren't caring

constantly barking. I would put water out for the dog and sometimes feed the dog because it was being neglected.  Finally, when no one was looking I had the dog come with me and I took it over to my moms house and found the dog a really loving home.  My bad? I don't care, I knew the dog was being well taken care of.  The lady I gave him too just doted on him and he was no longer neglected. 


Even though a dog is being fed and given water doesn't mean it isn't being neglected.  Animal neglect is a form of abuse.  If you call anyone, don't call Animal Control.  Call the Humane Society or some other entity who can take the animal so it won't end up being put to sleep.  It's not the dogs fault that the owner neglects him.


 


confidence of not caring what other people who don't matter think
nm
Thanks to all for caring. I will use Resolve and update on this board SM

to let you know. It happened so quickly, and I guess that is what happens when you snack in the living room. I am used to sometimes putting my glass or bowl on the floor when I am finished eating. This time I paid a high price. I think it may at least take some of the stain out, and thank God it was one of my smaller pans.  As Cat said,  a throw rug is an option as well.



Have a great Thanksgiving!  I am working, but will have the afternoon with my family. 


Well it sounds good but a true caring
and giving person that gives from the heart and not merely to impress would also probably not have thrown a post like that in the middle of ones where people are obviously having great financial difficulties. LOL. Sometimes ya just gotta laugh.

Bless you all that are having money problems and I hope things get better for you soon. And, remember, this too shall pass.
The drinkin kind or the rubbin kind?? sm
So....is that for me to drink so I don't notice or care that my hands are all splotchy black or to get the ink off?    Seriously though, do I use the rubbing alcohol - or like Jack Daniels??  and do I soak in it or what?  I never heard of using alcohol but I'll try anything. 
Are you a night person or a morning person?
Just curious . . .
I feel that is best too. I have been kind, very kind, to this ...sm
child since he moved here in March. I also am not one of those parent's that thinks my children are perfect. You never know what they might do out of your presence. I do know how I have raised them though and I am all for getting them all together when there is a problem and getting to the bottom of it but anymore that doesn't seem to work. The parents automatically get defensive and start making excuses, etc. I'm going to look for somewhere else to move. I've lived here for 2-1/2 years and we never had a problem until this boy moved in. His mother is a piece of work.
It probably varies from person to person (sm)

With me, first child I was out of the bed seriously within 5 minutes of having him.  I didn't tear or have to be cut, he was 7 pounds, 3 ounces.  The doctor did some type of vaginal massage on me though while I was in labor and that was supposed to help loosen the vaginal wall?


Second child, same experience.  She was 8 pounds, 1 ounce and within 5 minutes of having her, while they took her to the nursery to get cleaned up and all, I walked downstairs with my husband to the cafeteria to get a drink and stretch my legs.  I had already put my regular clothes back on as well.  My doctor who delivered her was walking in my room as I was walking in and he was stunned a second and said he thought I was a visitor, LOL, not the patient.


I don't think you have to have bed rest in normal cases.  With my son I went home within 24 hours with him and with my daughter we went home in only 20 hours.


Wow, you sound like
someone with real compassion for animals - NOT.

I personally would rather have my tax money go for this cause as opposed to going to cover welfare and disability incomes of people who are perfectly capable of working and just choose not to because they can. But that's just my opinion.
You know what? If it were me, and I know this may sound sm
way off to some people, but I would treat this young boy with love! Invite him over, talk to him, show him that someone truly loves him. I would invite him to church and pray for him. I know, totally unconventional. He acts that way because of his parents. He needs good, godly role models in his life. I would try my best to be that person.

I think too many people try to throw away bad kids. It's such a shame. They can be rehabilitated. 11 isn't that old. And I am not saying that is your responsibility because it's not! I understand that. But if I lived there, that is what I would do and see how that works. That saying, "love makes the world go round," is because love can turn a bad situation around. Bad always reaps bad.

I know because just this past Wed. I kept 5 kids at my house (I have 3 of my own!) and we stayed outside and played until 9 at night. I live out in the country and have a lot of land, animals, a pool, etc. The kids I had over has a dad serving in Iraq and I just wanted to give their mom a break. They don't have a yard where they live. They played until they collapsed. I ordered pizza and just loved on them. I see their mom struggling with them and I just wanted them to have a place where they could let loose and have a great time. One of them was a little ornery, but I would talk to her and be sweet and I really think I brought the best out in her. They brought their collie with them to play too and he ended up staying! So, we also have a new dog and we love him!

Good luck to you. I know this probably hasn't helped you much at all, but try not to be mad at him.
You sound
like a real taker and nasty, changing dirty diapers on a conference table?? I would have been finished with you then also. Gross. I have been at time share meetings before but a good answer is NO! Did not have to resort to a free this or that and I know how to get a point across without being offensive.
you sound like me

I have read people use timers to get themselves away from the computer when reading email on their working days.  For me, I keep talking to myself and saying "just do it"  especially when I feel the urge I want to begin and don't want to delay getting started any longer.  I was more energetic when I was a SE. 


Here's the sound for ya ...sm

 Cat 


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hBUO_1BPWU


How do you know who I am? You sound
xxx
That does sound a lot like us
I'm one of those tweeners size-wise; I'm not fat and not thin, wearing somewhere around a 10-12 jean, a 16 shirt, 5Ǝ", 170 pounds. But three children and breast-feeding have taken a toll, not to mention the varicose veins and a few randomly scattered keratoses. Like yours, mine claims (and acts) interested until it's actually bedtime, but then finds reasons not to come to bed. Like you also, the supposedly wanted advances have frequently been rejected (not outright, but more a 'not now' thing), so I've kinda quit putting myself out there, too. Fortunately, there are things that still say everything else is okay so I'm sticking it out, but with the price of batteries going up, we may have to find a better solution!
you sound like the big sis I need
Thanks for your note. I could be making more of this than what is really necessary. It is a horrible way to live (always planning for the worse and worrying about what's going on for things we can't control). I think he realized today that all the negative news and me having to work was really getting me down. I just feel myself getting heavier and heavier and I'm so exhausted right now I feel like I'm about to fall asleep and I have got to finish the rest of my work (about another 4 hours). The reason we don't celebrate holidays is actually an agreement we both have. We used to celebrate holidays but every year I found myself so depressed because I've been away from home for close to 30 years and it is still hard, and I cant just go home every year. And he does not like family rituals or whatever those things are called (can't think of the word), as in it's Thanksigiving so we eat Turkey because it's thanksgiving (family traditions - that's it). So over the years I found it easier to deal with the holidays by not celebrating them. If I do cook a turkey on Thanksgiving its because I feel like having turkey that day.

When I say I can't throw too much at him, he doesn't have health problems, but he just can't handle too much. We take one situation at a time. I learned that years and years ago. Me, I'll do 10 things at once, but I keep it simple for him otherwise, so he doesn't get too overwhelmed. Yes I know he's a big boy, but not all men act like it.

I may not be expressing myself too good at this point. I'm so exhausted and need to go lay down.

Thanks for listening. I liked your last line bout thinking his down and out feelings are more important than my well being. I will be thinking on that one more.

Thanks again.
you sound like me -
for the past couple of years, I have said, let's forget the gifts and just spend the day together at my mom's house -- but oh no, that would be horrible if we did not buy presents. This year, my sister's husband lost his job and now it's automatic, we are not going to be buying gifts.

I always wonder, why is it that one person in the family always seems to make the decisions for everybody else?
This is going to sound very mean, s/m
but I have three full grown cats and two of them won't leave the tree alone.  We go through this every year.  For the first two days, I do not plug the lights in but sit waiting with my squirt gun.  Once they are in the tree, I shoot.  They run.  Normally after the first two days, they won't climb it again, but they will sit underneath it and bat at the balls on the lower part of the tree, which I make sure are plastic just for them.  So far this has worked for me.  Now if anyone can find a way to keep them off the counter, let me know!  I have tried pepper, hot sauce, two sided tape and the squirt gun.   
You sound like the
Geez!

I'd rather live next to the cows and pine trees any day!
You sound like me. ...sm
We seem to get the strays. I don't have the heart not to try to take care of them. I am a succer for dogs.
If he has pit in him you definitely do not want to call animal control. I would just feed him and show him love and try to find him a home. I would just tell my husband look he has nowhere to go. Until I find his owner or a new owner I will be taking care of him. My husband gets annoyed with me too, but he won't deny a dog food and care.
LOL, you sound like me
Except not only would I start fights, if my BF was even 5 minutes late coming home I'd have his clothes and stuff on the front porch and him locked out. I'd make him beg and apologize for about 30 minutes before letting him in (but make him wait 30 more minutes before allowing him to bring his stuff back in so I could 'think about it'). Finally I realized why I was doing it and, once I did, I worked really hard on thinking before I did anything.

It takes a long time to drag yourself out of that craving for chaos. Now when I want thrills, I suggest he and I go do something crazy together instead of me throwing his belongings onto the front porch and it's been smooth sailing ever since, lol!

I would still like to know if the OP had the same type of upbringing we did. Hopefully she'll post again soon.
This may sound dumb...
but it's driving me crazy. Does anyone remember a Jewish actress, around 60-ish now, with very short dark red hair, very prominent features, large nose.  I think she played in a sitcom maybe as someone's mom. We saw her tonight in New York and all recognized her but none of us can remember what show she was on!  Just wondering if anyone might be able to help us figure this out.
This may sound a bit weird., but /sm
I read your post and got to thinking about when I lived in a really large house and kept missing the knocks at the front door. I got myself one of those wireless doorbells, and would take the "bell" part from room to room with me when I was expecting a delivery... I wonder if you could take the part that usually screws onto the door frame and put it on a necklace or something for you mother to wear and "ring the doorbell" when she needs help, and then take the "bell" part from room to room. Actually mine was loud enough I didn't need to pick it up and move it unless I was going upstairs. They might even sell them with 2 or more receivers (what I call "bells") so you could hear it ring on whatever floor you are on.

Good luck. I took care of my uncle when he had lung cancer and we rigged up a baby monitor for him, but he was in a 1-story house and I could hear him except at night time, so I can empathize.
do any of these sound like you this year?
CHRISTMAS CAROLS FOR THE DISTURBED

* 1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

* 2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

* 3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas

* 4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

* 5. Manic Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and.....

* 6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

* 7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

* 8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

* 9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the Froggy - can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?

* 10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle,Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells , Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,





 


What do you think? I know this may sound crazy, but here goes. sm

I am in my mid 30s and currently having orthodontic treatment done. The doctor is so sweet (great looking too!).  I find him staring at me whenever I come in there, unusually so.  He's very, very attentive to me when he sees me.  Fast forward to yesterday. I paid all of treatment within 3 months using insurance and cash (close to 5,000) and I received a letter today. He told me that he was so impressed with the way I set goals to pay my treatment in such a short time.  Then he went on to say he was "looking forward to getting to know me better."


Okay. I was a little shocked. Is this normal? I've never had this happen before. It was a personal, hand written note.


Anyways, just wondering what your thoughts would be on this.  He is the kindest, gentlest doctor I've ever been around.  But, that's besides the point.


Just wanted to share this with you all. Not really looking for advice. Just thought it was weird.


Okay - this is going to sound crazy
But if you are an MT and this is MT business - you might consider contacting the AAMT - which is stationed in Modesto, Calif - even if you are not a member you'd think they could be halfway helpful.  I'm familiar with the Sacramento area and could tell you places to stay away from there in Stockton and Sacramento but not familiar with Modesto.  Sorry and best of luck!!
Doesn't sound right
under those circumstances. Then whenever someone wanted new wall-to-wall they could just crap it up themselves and submit a claim and get a new rug.

At any rate, even if this is somehow true, the insurance company will only jack up your rate or drop you all together, so you're going to pay either way. And then you'll have a claim history and no other company will want you either.
We tried the sound machine...
and he didn't like that. I think he likes the air flow even if it's not directed at him. I hadn't ever thought about the cost that fan is running constantly.

I'm not clear about the white board (drywall?, white boards that you write on?) but certainly is a consideration. I could make that easily removeable and yes cover with fabric. Thanks for the ideas too.
Never will be another Motown sound
or anything close to it. Gosh there was no one who wasn’t the best there, was there? Kids off the street (as in Idol) getting the chance of their lifetime and giving us all that wonderful music. I can sing along with so many of the songs from back them. Such fond memories.
You have to be honest with him, but you do sound a bit. SM

codependent on him.  Something to think about.  I've been married twice (once for 10 years and to my current husband for 4 years) and you cannot change people.  You have to work on things together and try to change things together.  I man will never read your mind and do what you want.  You have to be very blunt with the male species and tell them what you want and need, but be careful about being too needy as that could be a turn off.


You must love him for who he is.


Good luck!  I wish someone would have told me some of this stuff 15 years ago, but I'm in my mid 30s and still learning.


You sound so much like my daughter.
She did it all, no wedding planner. I did not see her dress until the day of the wedding. She asked to see what I would be wearing as she thought (being as I am known for liking flash, sequins and the like) I might try to be over the hill according to her. It met with her approval but I know her and know what she would not like. She had a beautiful wedding and she, like you, a control freak, some are, some arent but that is what makes people interesting. She is a highly independent person so we talk often, I do not get into their business and think things are good like they are. If she needs me she knows the number.
You sound like one of the monitors here.
a