no its a big mess that I don't sm
Posted By: MT Trying to Stay Sane on 2009-03-21
In Reply to: Try Facebook, Twitter, My Space or those other blogs .. - no name
even want to post on this board. My son chose this. He started acting up when he was 18 years old and will be 35 in June. He just decided he wanted nothing to do with his family. We have been around and around with this junk. Last time he called was 2 years ago. He calls and starts a ruckus and then you don't hear from him for 3-4 years. I haven't laid eyes on him in 9 years. He has to figure out his own problems.
I have another son who is 32 and is a firefighter here where we live. He is a joy. He is married and I agree with you about a sons a son til he takes a wife. Everyone I know who has sons and DIL go through this. I love my daughter-in-law dearly and have never had a cross word with her but its not like my son and I don't get treated as well either. I just suck it up and go on. No reason to cause a ruckus.
O well, enough for today
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I am so sorry, what a mess. - sm
I agree, as I am sure you do, that your son is the #1 priority here. You need to stick to your guns and let him know that you will have him arrested as a runaway the next time he goes out of the house without your permission. Unfortunately, he really needs to be scared right now of what the consequences will be if he breaks rules. I would also suggest weekly drug tests for a while, just to let him know you are on top of it. I would also let your BIL know that if he ever touches your kid again he will be arrested for assult and that if you hear or see of him abusing his kids again you will call CPS on him... I know this sounds harsh, but he should not be allowed to get away with bullying anyone like he obviously is used to doing. As far as your sister is concerned, I agree with the other poster who said she may be scared of her husband. Wow this is really an ugly situation, and I am so sorry you are dealing with it. If you will accept, I would love to pray for the situation and all involved...
wow, what a mess
You and your husband need to sit down and work out a plan and present a united front. At the age of 19, he is legally an adult. This is your home and you have the right to be treated respectfully. It seems you both need to confront him with how you perceive his behavior and present some alternatives, whatever you decide is best. If he does not have a car in his name, take away the keys, even if you have to sleep with them in your pillowcase at night. You can't let this behaviour affect your younger child. You can withdraw the invitation that he stay at your home when not at school if he cannot treat you nicely. You don't have to DO these things, but present some alternatives if he doesn't change his ways and then follow through if he continues. They say people treat you badly only if you allow it. It sounds like it's time to stand up and be firm about how you are treated. Best of luck in a tough situation. I hope you get your husband's support as that will be critical. Don't let this man ruin your marriage.
Hot mess is what I think. nm
n
wow, what a mess to go through for so long!
The reason for having to file CS orders against both is that my GD gets a small welfare check each month, Medicaid coverage and WIC (for now and free school lunches later). All CS attempts/costs are handled by the state agency, not a private attorney. They now have an interstate agreement that is supposed to be more efficient, but hey, that is their ball of wax. Any money they collect goes to the state first to repay the aid my GD gets, along with all the associated collection fees...so I really am not holding my breath (might pass out! lol) on EVER seeing any money. Neither of them can ever have custody of the child again due to the laws in my state, so what I have is the next best thing to adoption, plus GD gets the aid. So, I'll let the state do their thing - they are rated very high on the list of collecting CS as compared to other states - and now that I'm done with court appearances, I will just raise my little one and let those that need to worry do it for me :)
Thanks for your support and advice!
listening to this mess-
I think doctors today are just different. I remember doctors that would actually stop and rewind to the spot that needed to be corrected instead of dictating it after the fact. I also recall the time when doctors did not say "umm, or keep you hanging waiting for the next word. I overheard two doctors discussing his mother's surgery and recovery. The attendings that are "supposed" to be training these up and coming doctors should include dictation techniques.
I did not say this was my sister-in-law, did I? What a MESS!!!
NM
I was on a rant and about a mess....
and yelled 'pick up your toys and put them away, dammit!"
She - then 4 - started to do so, but turned back and looked me right in the eye and said,
"don't call me dammit!"
had to laugh.
She does not need TMZ , she makes her own mess.
I saw these pictures actually on celebs on Craig's List yesterday, not TMZ.
Re: Beneficiaries in a will (what a mess)...
Hi to all you smart legal types,
My dear sweet grandfather passed away on February 6, 2009, at the age of 87.
My brother and I have been named in the will in place of my father who has alcohol dementia and is in a nursing home receiving state assistance. My aunts and uncles (my father's sisters and brothers) are also in the will. My grandfather's intent was to keep the estate in the family, so,therefore the will was changed to me and my brother. On the day of the funeral my aunt (who is the executor) informs me that there may be some CDs and/or life insurance policies that were not changed to me and my brother and are still in my father's name. My grandfather's intent when changing the will of course was to keep the estate in the family and not have it to go to the State of Wisconsin since my father is receiving Medicare and Medicaid. This does not make sense to me why everything was not originally changed!
I am unsure how this all goes, but these things I have learned from a friend who went through a similar situation and want someone to clarify me if I am wrong.
Here goes: First off, why would the original lawyer (they have since hired someone else to handle the estate since my father passed now) not have made sure everything was changed and had my father's name taken off everything? Shouldn't this have been part of his job since the original intent was to keep it in the family? And if this is part of his job, someone suggested I contact his malpractice company as this may be our recourse to this dilemna since he didn't do his job properly.
Secondly, since my aunt is the executor, I was also told that what an executor does is acts in the behalf of the deceased (my grandfather) and she has the authority to have this changed even now. She is telling my brother who is the power of attorney for my father that he needs to hire a lawyer and have this changed. I am also told from my friend that if he does have to hire a lawyer he can sue the estate to recoup the costs of doing so, which I am sure will go over like a lead balloon! Is my aunt not aware of what her role is or am I wrong? My brother of course has a passive/aggressive personality and I am the go-getter, and he basically said he doesn't care and wants to let it go because he does not want to deal with it. I feel if my aunt is so concerned about it and keeps bugging him about it and has the authority, then she needs to do it. But, I also told him that grandpa's intent was to keep it in the family and if something can be done to change it then we should, but of course it may not be worth it monetary wise either as the lawyers will get a good chunk of change. And on that note, am I allowed to ask the lawyer exactly the dollar amounts we are talking such as life insurance, CDs, or the estate itself since I am listed on the will? My aunt told my brother, but not me and he says he doesn't remember.
I am not very trusting of my family and I can see greed written all over this! If this is not being handled properly by the family, especially my aunt, I am trying to figure out what is in it for her. I have a call into the new lawyer, which by the way, I was not told that we had switched laywers by my aunt. I only found out through my brother who I spoke with the other day. Since we are all listed in the will, we should all be kept informed. I don't believe the family really wanted me and my brother in the will, but agreed to make the best a of bad situation as best as they could, versus the State getting the money or the only grandchildren listed in the will!
Sorry so long and windy, but have so much on my mind right now regarding this situation and until I get some real answers this will bother me all day. Please if anyone out there understands anything about how wills and/or estates work and has any insight, please respond.
Thank you!
You wanna mess your cat up for good?
Get a chicken...nay, a ROOSTER. My old cat thought he saw an all-you-can-eat buffet when he first met "Steve," my Rhode Island Red. He was stalking Steve from behind a bush (my chickens are free rangin'), started that low belly-creep towards his prey, and Steve saw him coming from the eyes that are in the back of his head. That bird actually turned on my old cat and chased HIM away. He's been reformed ever since and hardly goes outside anymore, even though Steve and his girls are long gone. He's totally shell shocked, even though Steve never got near him. Even the cute little chickadees in the window feeder make his hair stand on end now.
Re: SICKO, the healthcare mess, etc.
Interesting video on YouTube - this guy says it simply & eloquently. He wants people to send him videos on the subject - anyone out there in MT with a PC-cam could certainly get the word out on the offshoring-of-medical-records to a HUGE audience in this way. Here's a link to the video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8NDs4YuLXE
He doesnt want the kids cause they would mess up his
asdf
We ALL mess with mother nature
Who among us has not colored their hair, seen a plastic surgeon because we weren't satisfied with our bodies, took a pill to alter our mood or help a physical condition that made us uncomfortable? Who has not dieted, worn colored contact lenses, got a perm, had liposuction? Who didn't get their ears pierced, or love someone who has a body piercing or a tattoo? Even if you never did any of these things, did it make you "sick" whenever someone else did?
Why is it MY business what someone else does with their body? Oh, that's right, it isn't. If I don't like your decision to become a blonde, should it make me "sick"? Should I sneer at you and throw rocks because I personally don't like it that you got breast implants? Well, that's what people do to people that change their sex. What gives them the right?
I am still cleaning up my mess from about 2 months -sm
ago. We have paid off all but $3K on my husbands cards, have them paid off in full by March, don't want to get stretched to thin over Christmas, car insurance on 2 cars and propane for heat. I am on hardship plans with 2 of my credit cards, one is no interest for a year, the other is 10% for a year. Cut the payment in half on one, the other only by about a 1/3). Have 2 of my others current again--small balances on those, and working on getting the last one current--need another $600 on that one to get caught up after not paying for about 3 months. But in 2009 plan to use a debt settlement company and for at least the 2 that are on the hard ship plan (don't think it will work on anything you have current) and that should save me I hope at least $15K before interest, which is about 40% of the total due on those two. But waiting until 2009 because of the tax liability, will have a year to save up the taxes owed on any settled accounts, have $1400 set aside so far, figured on saving at least $3K to be safe. --but yes you can do a lot yourself in terms of negotiating a lower payment and interest as long as you show good faith. I am making my payments on time (they directly debit it from checking). Learned a lot here asking questions. Sorry to hear you got ripped for the $400 but as someone hear pointed out, you ask to be put on the hardship plan and they transfer you over to another department who handles repayment plans, etc.
She was irrelevant 10 years ago..what a hot mess!
//
Sooo true! But I didn't mess her up.
No really, she is a rescue.
:oD
Does divorce always mess up boys' lives?? (sm)
So worried about my 10 year old son, whether I go or whether I stay. Anyone with experience?
Heck no! 40 is a great age- you know enough not to mess around but you don't have Alzheimer's
Wean yourself from her, little by little, for your own peace of mind. She'll either get the mess
x
ADDENDUM. Just trying to get some straight answers and not sure what to make of this whole mess. nm
nm
I feel your pain... sometimes I consider shaving my head!!! I just keep it short so as not to mess
nm
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