I need some help.

I'm not usually one to post this kind of thing on a site like this, but I'm at my wits' end and y'all seem like sensible people, from what I can tell :) While I think God everyday that I don't have my neighbor's 8-year-old son, who's gotten the police called on him 4 times this summer, my son is driving me insane.  He's 6-1/2 and hopefully when school starts tomorrow, things will look up, but right now, I don't know what else to do with him.  He lacks respect for me completely.  Whatever I say, no matter how simple, he questions.  Everything has a "why" attached to it.  Put on your shoes.  Why?  Don't walk in the middle of the street.  Why?  And it's not a matter of being curious, it's just challenging me.

He's seen this behavior with his dad, who I just recently divorced, but who has been out of the house for 18 months now (no contact since then).  He was very physically and emotionally abusive to me (not my son) and I know I have PTSD, so I can imagine he has some degree of it, as well.  However, all this started all of the sudden in about the past 12 months or so.  He won't listen to anything I say, at all.  I've taken away his TV, the majority of his toys, tried time outs, tried reward programs, tried everything, really.  It's just like, everything I say, he's got to challenge.  There's never a time when I ask him to do something that he just does it.

I've also got an 18-month-old that I've noticed he enjoys seeing cry.  He seems to like to do things to tick her off.  Maybe this is a plea for attention, I don't know.  I know I'm struggling to find time to be a good mom, working full-time and being single, but I make it a point (if he behaves appropriately) to take him out to the park, etc. several times a week.  Another thing is, he likes to throw temper tantrums, especially in public.  Any time I try to talk to him about why he acts these ways, it's "I don't know," and that's as far as we get.  I have him in counseling, as well, but again, he walls up and that's all she gets out of him.

If there's anyone who's been there, done that, lived to see the other side, or is going through the same thing now, I'd love to hear from you.  I really want to stop this cycle of his attempted control before he grows up thinking that's okay and I've got another ex-husband to deal with!  Thanks so much.

• I need some help. - :(
  • may be oppositional-defiant disorder? Perhaps a visit to your pediatrician would help. Also - sm
  • i have a 6-1/2yob too that sounds very similar to your story; sm - roadrunner
  • thanks y'all - :(
    • I've had lots of experience with this...sm - Foster mom
  • I had the same problem with my son - been there
  • need help? - Rebeccar

The messages you are viewing are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select the boards given in left menu