Very sad - but obviously an illness.
Posted By: sm on 2006-06-03
In Reply to: Crazy Day - bowlingMT
Nobody would be drinking at that hour of the day for *fun*. I hope instead of throwing the fines at her they make her go for professional help.
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- Crazy Day - bowlingMT
- Very sad - but obviously an illness. - sm
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Don't know what your illness is, but
wish you could see some of the doctors I work for. My brother and his wife are both doctors and they are both increcible caring. My uncle goes to Africa every year (on his on dime) to do cleft lip and palate surgeries. Maybe you just need to vent but I don't think it is fair to generalize all.
chronic illness
God bless you. I have systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE) and I still work full time, I have a friend diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and she still works full time..Hang in there, honey..You can live with a chronic illness..I have lived with my SLE for 36 years and my friend with multiple sclerosis for 10 years..
Illness/pregnancy
These are supposed to be treated the same - 12 weeks leave - my mother-in-law got sick last year and when she could not go back to work by the date that the hospital specified (she's a nurse) they terminated her from her job - and she had worked at this place for 20 years. I would seek legal advice on this subject before telling anyone at work.
kids and illness
I have ttwokids - 22 and 15, my oldest was born with epilepsy and took them 2 years to find out I was not crazy that something was wrong - he would just fall into a come sleep - no convulsion. Now my 15 year old has an episode - his first and when I rush him to the hospital it takes them 3 hours to be convined he was not on drugs - I know they are doing their job, but not all kids are druggies. i tried to give them a family history and they did not listen until 3 hours later when they got the blood tests back - then they did what they should haev done all along and found out his blood pressure was extremly low, and he probably has a mild hert condition to go alond with his respiratory problems he has had from birth. (heart problems run on both sides, and I have a strong family history of epilepsy too.) Why do all doctors feel that when a kid comes in he must have done something - thank goodness the wait did not cause my son more problems.
Depression is an illness. (sm)
Believe it or not, I understand your feelings about just doing your job day after day and not being appreciated. I think most of us can relate to it; I know when I clean the house or do the laundry, nobody seems to notice, but let me get behind, and boy, howdy all of a sudden I get some attention.
But depression is an ILLNESS, not just a lack of get up and go!!! And a person who suffers from it is hard enough on themselves emotionally without having to hear from people who don't understand it how lazy they are and how undeserving of any support they are.
You need to work on some compassion, and if you can't say anything nice, why say anything at all? If you're feeling underappreciated, for heaven's sake DO something about it. Post on the board that you need some sympathy and you'll get it. We're all in the same boat, really!
An illness? More like a character flaw.
We all have choices to make, and the choices we make define our character. She chooses to drink herself into a stupor and drive a car. She could just as easily choose not to do so. It's all the apologists for drunks, the "it's-an-illness-we-must-not-judge-them" brigade that keep sending the dangerous drunks back out on the road. If someone chooses to drink and drive then kills someone, they have chosen to commit murder and should face the same consequences as any murderer.
Sounds like you are the one with mental illness
NM
No, you didn't betray him! That's his illness speaking. Second, does he or did he ever drink?
Some folks with drinking problems obviously are also alcoholics, but they don't have to fit the classic "drunk" stereotype. My husband "cycles" as well, probably from bipolar, which is manic depressive - the happy ups and the mean ugly lows. Men tend to self-medicate with alcohol. Also, when an alcoholic is in an abstinent period, which can even often be self decided, no pressure. The drinker just lays off for a while - that mean cycle is a "dry" alcoholic. The original problems remain - the alcohol isn't there to give them their conceived happy "buzz", so they are mean and nasty as they could be as drunks, yet sober. The only way to defeat depression in anyone is by confronting it head-on and NOT letting up. Otherwise, you're then "enabling" their sickness to continue, etc. Sounds more complicated than it is, but its not! You're doing everything right - get help from everywhere, tell everyone you have to, shine light on his behavior, and HOPEFULLY he will be convicted to get help. Otherwise, I agree with the others - pack your bags and move on. It will NEVER get better. It will get worse over time, but you'll get more numb to it... No way to live! I confronted it with my DH - fought viciously for his life, really, and he's a changed healthy man about 10 years down the road. People CAN change, and seek help, and get well, but they have to be confronted with it. Denial is our worst enemy. Good luck to you. I hope this helps.
If he is on disability for a mental illness, why do you even listen to him? He is nuts. Maybe if h
x
OK. Now if your husband is bringing you down by his mental illness and not paying rent
(is husband able to work? how deep is this mental illness? did he have money to pay rent and spent it elsewhere?) then maybe you should think about leaving him rather than placing your kids in any kind of foster care. That has to be traumatic but then so does living on the street. Speaking of placing your children in foster care while you get yourself OK in the head, what is your problem at this point. You see, if there is a lot of arguing and a dysfunctional family living on the streets, then foster care to permanent placement may be better for them. I just don't quite understand how you got into this mess and if these are mental health issues on both your part and your husband's I would look into placing the children. BTW, how old are they?
So all things considered if you don't have any issues other than depression because of a lack of a place to live and your husband's mental health, I would go to a family member or church and BEG for help sorting your life out. If there is more than that going on, including maybe substance abuse along with permanent mental health issues that will keep you from caring for your children, yes I would seek placement for them. And I would seek PERMANENT placement rather than foster care which I would think would be more traumatic for your children.
Both. Choice A "can" put you there, but so can a major illness, accident, fire, etc.
with this economy it is harder and harder to work your way out of poverty no matter what the reason for being there is.
After divorce, child chronic illness, involuntary job change, parents illnesses and death, was force
I frequently regret it, the changes it has made to my life, but when life hands you horror, at least there is this "final solution" to your financial situation. I must admit, I sleep better, and I can finally hold my head up, and I no longer feel hopeless. Find the attorney you can work with,get your free consultation and DO WHAT HE TELLS YOU TO DO. If you have doubts, see a 2nd and a 3rd attorney, till you're comfortable with the person you choose.
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