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this is my dilemma

Posted By: need advice on 2006-06-26
In Reply to:

I have a question for any of you in a 2nd marriage with stepchildren. I have 2 stepchildren, 2 of my own. It has been a nightmare with DH's kids who are 17 and 18. They came to live with us full time. They were disrespectul, horrible grades, the older has gotten herself pregnant twice, they've been caught drinking, etc etc you get the picture. The stress on my marriage has brought us to the brink of divorce many times but last year they went back to live with their mother. Now husband wants to bring the youngest back here. I cant go into all the details but I refuse to go back to an extremely dysfunctional and toxic living situation. (My kids have not been a problem whatsoever). Some of you may think I'm being selfish but honestly if you knew how hard I tried to help those kids, I did everything in my power and they just got worse.

My question is has anyone else had this kind of problem?


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Dilemma...
Don't do it. On so many levels, it is not a good idea. Your kid is worth a few more bucks of gas money. In a few years, she'll be gone and you will wish you could chaffeur her around.
Somewhat of a Dilemma
I'm not sure what to do in my situation.  To try to make a long story short, I worked for a small company doing transcription for a Nephrologist's office.  The nephrologist's office came to me directly offering me a job.  They told me to give my two weeks notice without any specifics and then they would tell her that they no longer needed her services after today.   I feel guilty and want to tell my old company that the reason I left is because the nephrologist's office offered me a better position with more pay.   The nephrology group doesn't think I need to tell her where I went when I quit, but I feel like I should.  I'm not sure how to go about telling her now after the fact.  Any thoughts would be appreciated
Dilemma
They're paying me a lot more as far as money and benefits go. I'm certainly not ungrateful and was only asking for guidance and not to be called names. I want to tell them and I was just asking for a way to let them know. I have the feeling they suspect. If I told you half of what I had to put up with at my old job you'd wonder his this MTSO is in business themselves.
This is a dilemma--SM
There are several things that come to me about this situation.

1) Your ethics and theirs are somewhat of a mismatch which is causing you pause and rightfully so.

2) Don't be swayed by the "ungrateful" speech/lecture. She raises valid points, but the fact that you're questioning yourself and this situation is a good and reasonable thing. No need to beat you up about it. You already have a conscience, otherwise you wouldn't be posting for more input.

3) There are two ethical ways out that I can see.

A) Turn down their offer flat--thank you, but no thank you b/c....

B) Accept their offer, but refuse to lie about it or allow them to put you in that situation. Tell them that the only way you'll contemplate their offer is if they go to your current boss about your being hired away and offer a "finders fee"--this would be similar to situations arranged by temp agencies that place people in "temp to hire" positions. The hiring company, if the temp is hired, pays the agency a fee for the placement. Everybody comes out clean and most, if not all of the parties, come out ahead, especially since this is an above board handling of the situation.

4) I think that you will have to think carefully about their work "offer" in view of their ethics. If they are willing to deceive your boss, what might they be willing to do to you if they change their minds or, indeed, decide to hire someone cheaper. Perhaps you'd want to consider the difference between "at will" employee vs. having a signed contract with them. (Here's a Wikipedia link to explain, though I would not take their word for it explicitly, but contact a lawyer to further explain and/or help you walk through the process should you actually go this route.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/At-will)

Good luck.

I know that dilemma! You never know if you are going to be able (sm)
to get good line counts with the new company so it is a hard choice. Is there any way you can try out the new company part-time for a while to be sure the work is good? Best wishes to you. I have two small children and am also thinking of seperating from my husband.
dilemma with teenager
I have a 14-year-old daughter who is on an athletic team that practices after school every day. We live in a rural area and it is a 15 mile round trip to pick her up. A neighbor boy who just got his license a week ago has offered to bring her home as he goes right by our house. We have had a rule that she is not allowed to ride with boys in a car alone yet but with the price of gas, I'm wondering if I should rescind that rule. I don't really know the boy well so I'm uneasy about it. Any thoughts on this?
Parental dilemma...sm
I am looking for some parenting advice.  My daughter is 8 years old and one of her friend's father died this weekend.  The school counselor went in to speak to her class today to let the children know that this child had lost a parent.  She then sent home letters with information regarding funeral services and some info on how to talk to your children, etc.  Anyway...my daughter wants to go to the funeral in the morning and I have no idea on whether I should take her or not.  Neither my husband nor I knew either parents of this child.  My daughter was a "new" kid last year and this little girl has been a good friend since we have been here and my daughter is very fond of her.  I told my daughter I would think about it tonight and let her know in the morning and I have no clue what to do.  I feel uncomfortable going to a funeral where I have only met the mother of this child once (at a birthday party) and my daughter has had no real experience with death.  The only thing she has had to deal with is the death of a pet.  I talked to her about the funeral and what it was, including people being upset, and of course a casket, and what that was, and she still wants to go.  Does anyone have any experiences like this...or is just plain willing to give me an opinion?
IC loyalty dilemma

The owner of the company I contract through has a strict policy that you do NOT ever converse directly with the client.  I am on an account where there are 4 of us doing it.  One girl continuously keeps writing the client with everything from asking about formatting to asking what some medical terms are.  I have asked her in a prevous e-mail to please not do that, due to the work policy.  She has continued to do so.  I don't know what to do.  If I turn her in, she would know it came from me, and would I be a rat?  She claims that she and the client made an agreement to e-mail each other without telling the owner of the MT company.


Thanx for any input!


Shorthand Dilemma
When I type the abbreviation for an expansion the first letter gets separated from the rest of the expansion.

Examples: tp (the patient) expands to: t he patient.
sep (September) expands to: S eptember

This only happens when I use the doctor's normals created by the hospital, for my account. I print out the normals, then insert them into my Shorthand, and refine them further, adding additional text that the doctor says all the time, and then save the whole thing -- in other words I have customized the normal even further.

If I just pull up the hospital normal (with a Ctrl + R) and type in it, there is no problem with expansions. But if I put the normal into my Shorthand, customize it, save it, and then print it out, sometimes I get these "separated expansions" and sometimes I do not when I type in the report. I can't figure out what is making it happen, but it's driving me nuts, and I can't find a pattern.

I've used ShortHand for years with Word and never had this weird problem. Any ideas on what is causing this and how to solve it?
I can understand your dilemma sm
Honesty is best. I can't imagine being on my feet all day and/or doing something really physical because after years of sitting all day, I am deconditioned to the max. Perhaps you are the same way.

Tell them you are not physically up to the job, which is true.

As for MT, I have to tell you, I have had jobs I have regretted quitting and jobs that have dissolved for other reasons, just at a time I was loving them. I am one to say that MT jobs are a dime a dozen. The problem is, you don't want to work for 11 of that dozen! The grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence, and I have suffered from the idea that it is.

I feel your pain, but you have to do what is right for you. I am sure they can find someone else.
My economic dilemma is the same only perhaps on a higher scale...
I have had my cable connection shut off so many times for nonpayment, my utilities are not being paid in full because we simply never have enough money, groceries are now a luxury rather than a necessity as are utilities by the way...my pay has diminished greatly due to the global market and competing with countries like India in Medical Transcription.

I am aware of India and their problems but I am concerned for my own situation and survival.

got interrupted, cannot finish, but had to make my point
Dilemma! Tomorrow is picture day and my 5 yo just went wild w/a jug of blue food coloring --

 


both hands and the entire lower half of his face are now bright, royal blue.. Will this wash off by morning???