Home     Contact Us    
Main Board Job Seeker's Board Job Wanted Board Resume Bank Company Board Word Help Medquist New MTs Classifieds Offshore Concerns VR/Speech Recognition Tech Help Coding/Medical Billing
Gab Board Politics Comedy Stop Health Issues
ADVERTISEMENT




Serving Over 20,000 US Medical Transcriptionists

Joke

Posted By: Democrat on 2006-01-28
In Reply to:

MUJIBAR 


 
Mujibar was trying to get a job in India. 
The Personnel Manager said, Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, 
Except one. Unless you pass it you cannot qualify for this job. 
Mujibar said, I am ready. 
The manager said, Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green.
Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, Mister manager, I am ready. 
The manager said, Go ahead. 
Mujibar said, The  telephone goes green, green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow, this is Mujibar.'
Mujibar now works as a technician at a call center for computer problems. 
No doubt you have spoken to him.




Complete Discussion Below: marks the location of current message within thread

The messages you are viewing are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select the boards given in left menu


Other related messages found in our database

You are such a joke, gt. sm
You think there is only one patriot here?  Get a trip on your sour shrivled heart and try not to speak.
what a joke
You truly are a JOKE, LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL..a joke.  I live in reality and deal with reality..you, however, through YOUR posts have proven you are nothing but a joke.bye bye neocon..
LOL..JOKE!



Actually the joke is on us all...sm

First, yes there are terrorist.  They attacked us on 9-11.  The joke started with the trumped up war against Iraq.  That mind you went from a war because of WMD, then a war to rid the world of a brutal dictator, then Operation Iraqi freedom, and now finally operation quagmire. 


Ask yourself a couple questions ever so often and see if you still can laugh. *Did Al Quaeda reside in Iraq BEFORE the war????* Or even *Was Iraq a hot bed for terrorist BEFORE the war????* 


The issue of the port protection is a different story.  I think it would be in America's best interest to develop a US based security company or team.  We should not be depending on *outsourced* protection.  That's downright sloppy to me.  I wouldn't care what country it was. 


 


Is that a joke?
Because it sounds like the answer to the war on terror to me. 
Okay, now for a joke.
Rush *Limp*baugh blames liberals because Americans are fat. Huh?....talk about intellectually confused. http://mediamatters.org/items/20060829013
joke joke joke

Obama is chocolate, biden is vanilla.  It never works when you have to explain your jokes.  Mea culpa.


 


Oh come on - it's a joke! Do you truly believe everything
???
some joke-
NOT. What an awful thing to say, that that death would be a joke to anyone. Rights - what about responsibilities, like the responsibility to use some form of contraception other than abortion? I know you will come back with the rape, incest, endangered health of mother, and those are valid. But reality is that a large percentage of abortions are not performed for those reasons but for the "convenience" of the mother. And being that irresponsible is not a "right."
Because she's a joke.

What a joke........
May I suggest you go to their country and see how peaceful they live with you? So many try to defend something they haven't bother to study.

The holiest book of Islam draws the sharpest of distinctions between Muslims and non-Muslims, lavishing praise on the former while condemning the latter. Far from teaching universal love, the Qur'an incessantly preaches the inferiority of non-Muslims, even comparing them to vile animals and gloating over Allah's hatred of them and his dark plans for their eternal torture. Naturally, the harsh treatment of non-believers by Muslims is encouraged as well.

Does that sound like a loving tolerant people to you?
This has got to be a JOKE!!!

Of all the nerve!!  I think this person needs to be banned from this site, as obviously this person is not in the MT field and just spreading a bunch of garbage to rile people up.


No, you did not mean it as a joke.
What's your problem. Is the pressure getting to you? Then stay off this board.
It's hot in here.
can't even take a joke
x
I have seen this joke before...
All you have to do is replace Obama with Bush and you have the same joke.
Just a joke...(sm)

From an episode of Seinfeld.....I need one at my house too...LOL


Also see: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQFLqMyo0fo


Festivus is an annual holiday created by writer Dan O'Keefe and introduced into popular culture by his son Daniel, a scriptwriter for the TV show Seinfeld.[1][2] Although the original Festivus took place in February 1966 as a celebration of O'Keefe's first date with his wife, Deborah,[2] many people now celebrate the holiday on December 23, as depicted on the December 18, 1997 Seinfeld episode "The Strike".[1][3] According to O'Keefe, the name Festivus "just popped into his head."[2] The holiday includes novel practices such as the "Airing of Grievances", in which each person tells everyone else all the ways they have disappointed him or her over the past year. Also, after the Festivus meal, the "Feats of Strength" are performed, involving wrestling the head of the household to the floor, with the holiday only ending if the head of the household is actually pinned. These conventions originated with the TV episode. The original holiday featured far more peculiar practices, as detailed in the younger Daniel O'Keefe's book The Real Festivus, which provides a first-person account of an early version of the Festivus holiday as celebrated by the O'Keefe family, and how O'Keefe amended or replaced details of his father's invention to create the Seinfeld episode.[4]


It was a JOKE... nm
Read the full story rather than taking and posting remarks out of context to further your own agenda.
What a joke!
Your post doesn't even deserve a response.
No joke!
End of the year garden veggie soup - nothing better! We ate a lot of soup growing up, too, but I think that's why I hate chili so much now! =)
What a joke, huh?
!!
I do believe this must be a joke
First, we know you don't like Fox because you prefer to live in a box and be told how to think, told how to vote, and told how to bash. That's what I hear on their station (I just watched it yesterday). They were telling people how they should be thinking.

Fox gives us both sides. You evidently don't know what that means. That means they present a conservative viewpoint and a liberal viewpoint. I always see liberal guests on the show and they are treated fairly. They let them speak and give their viewpoint, and that's it. The host of the show always says something like "We'd like to thank you for coming on our show to share your viewpoint. Now the audience at home can decide. Once again, nice to have you come on the show, we hope to have you back again". What is not fair about that?????? You go to MSNBC and CNN and if the guest is not liberal (which is rare) you've got Chris Matthews, Keith Olberman, and Rachel Maddow (and some of the other reporters there) treating them like they are a piece of dirt, sitting and interrupting and not letting them speak, and they are badgered by their elitist attitude. That's why I (and millions of other viewers turned them off). We want the truth and want to decide for ourselves.

I saw the episode of Glenn Beck pouring water on that guy (forget his name but he's on the show Red Eye (an excellent show!). That was not imitating Obama, it was imitating government. That's the message I got. Obama doesn't make decisions, Congress does. Congress passes the bills, etc. Obama is just a talking head, doing what he is told to do. Just like Bush was.

Glenn Beck has an excellent show, and you can tell because the numbers of his viewers keeps growing and growing and growing (and that is why the other stations are flailing around). With Beck we finally we get to hear the truth of what is going on in the country. It's about the only sanity we get.

If you don't like it don't watch it, but please, don't come here with this little petty petition.

The only paranoia that is in the news is coming from the liberals. Luckily it is not working. The liberal media is like a kid that runs into a theater yelling fire when there isn't one and then gets upset and whines when he gets in trouble for making false claims.

And the only hate I see is coming from the liberal media.

There has been no damage done to Fox network. Millions of viewers are tuning in each day and more are coming to watch. That is why MSNBC and CNN are losing rating big time. If they reported the truth and if they were fair and honest and treated their guests with dignity they ratings would go up, but they don't so they aren't. And now hearing tonight that the Glenn Beck show had three times as many viewers as MSNBC, CNN and some other station all rolled together, it doesn't surprise me about these false claims they are making.

Sign the petition??? Puleease, I'd laugh if I could. I'll save that for Red Eye tonight.
neither, nor, not even a joke.....nm
nm
The joke is on you really.
Rush has no authority or power over anyone.  He doesn't control our taxes or anything of the sort.  He is a very conservative person who tells his opinion like it is without playing politics.  His ratings are higher than they have ever been.  So give this whole Rush thing a break.  I don't see Rush running for office of any kind.  He is just speaking his mind truthfully without caring whether or not he ticks off the dems.  How many politicians feel the same way but are too busy playing dirty politics to keep their position?  Come on...give me a break.  Rush is nothing but a commentator on the radio.  It is you people who continue to put him at a higher place than he really is.
Is this a joke?
Let me see if I'm understanding you. They've taxed a lot of "vices" to price them out of the hands of the everyday man. You mean being gay is soon going to be solely the prerogative of the idle rich? Poor people won't be gay?

Do you really have the misguided thought that not only do people choose to be gay, they choose it based on their economic status?

I hate to break it to you, but gay is gay, and it crosses all socioeconomic, racial, ethnic, and religious categories.
She's a joke!
Can't believe she actually made it to Congress! When I lived in her district, I wouldn't have even voted for her for dog catcher!
Given to exaggeration much? LOL. What a joke. nm

You're a JOKE!

You're discussing issues on the CON board?  You people can't leave the liberal board long enough to do so.  You're obsessed with us.


Someone posted *George Will Speech -- read and discuss* on the CON board TWO DAYS AGO, yet not even ONE person responded with a post to *discuss* it.  Your board is stagnant and boring.  You can't be around people who agree with you because then you can't feel superior and judge others negatively, which is the extent of your measly *contribution* to any conversation.


The only people who are out for blood is the CONS, whether it's done by the government and executed by ones in power, or whether it's done on a message board by some poor lowly peon with absolutely no power, using an opportunity to demean those who don't agree for the purpose of building up their own pitiful selves.


You are a JOKE! 


Joke for liberals. sm

 


How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to change a light bulb?


The Answer is ELEVEN:

1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed.

2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed.

3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb.

4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either: For changing the light bulb or for darkness.

5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb.

6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a stepladder under the banner Light Bulb Change Accomplished.

7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark.

8. One to viciously smear #7.

9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light bulb-changing policy all along.

10. One to change the wrong lightbulb.

11. And finally one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.


Another joke for liberals...

Hillary's Deal With the Devil


Hillary was finishing up a day as Senator for New York when the Devil suddenly appeared in her office and made her an offer...

I am here to offer you a deal, the Devil said. I will give you unlimited wealth, even more power, and a media that will pander to your every whim. In return, all I ask for is your soul, the souls of every member of your family, and the souls of all your constituents.

Hillary pondered for a moment and then asked, Unlimited wealth and power?

Absolutely unlimited, the Devil asserted.

A pandering media? she asked.

They'll fall over themselves to support you, no matter what you say or do, the Devil assured.

And you want my soul, my family's souls, and the souls of my constituents? she asked.

Yes. All of them, the Devil answered.

Hillary was deep in thought for a moment, then finally spoke:

So...what's the catch?


I got the same joke today ..
but it also had "go to Indian casinos and buy prostitutes and beer!"
It was NOT obvious it was a joke -
This is what McCain is about. He obviously wants to wipe out other nations. He's been heard singing about it. This is not "amusing", this is not "cute", this is not "a joke", and this is certainly not "Statesmanlike". As for Michelle's comment. If Obama had said it, yes I would say go after him. But she is not running for President, and when it comes to this people always say leave Cindy McCain alone even though she's said and done some whoppers in the past. We all know what Michelle meant and I feel bad she added the word "first" in there. This is called a mistake. Everyone makes them. This was not a serious mistake. I'll tell you though...there is not a lot to be proud of. Bush's, Clinton's, slimy politicians and lawyers and corporate executives destroying hard working Americans lives. Nobody caring about people losing their homes, gas prices rising, gouging of other costs. Executives being dismissed from jobs but receiving multi million dollar settlements, while the workers lose their jobs with nothing. You tell me what is there to be proud of. We've still got a long way to go in race relations as unfortunately there are still a lot of biggots in this country who believe because of the color of his skin he should not be president. But to harp on this issue because Michelle said the word "first". Everyone knows what she meant (even Mrs. Bush made a statement in that regard). As for Barack sitting down with our enemies - you better count on it if we ever plan to get along with other countries. You HAVE to sit with your enemies and work out a strategy to live on the earth together in peace (even Kennedy, Carter, and Reagan have all said that). Not coward and hide in a corner like McCain would (oh no, that's right - he'd obliterate them). Let the Michelle comment rest and focus on what the candidates are saying (or not saying) and doing. Look at their records. Leave Cindy M and Michelle O out of it.
No, joke is on you and proves you do NOT
The writers of the constitution DID NOT have electoral college. It was not written into law until the 1800s it is called "college of electors" and even then, it did not work because they had to amend AGAIN because political parties emerged, which showed electoral college did not work.

When the constitution is spoke of, it should mean as our founding fathers meant it. I say again, it is UNCONSTITUTIONAL.
Fox is not a worldwide joke...it just does not ...
show only one side as the others do. You liberals are extremely intolerant and condescending with ANYONE who does not share your world view. You really should change the name of the party, because it has little to do with democracy anymore. Socialist Party would be more truthful.

Half the politicians on the hill have no idea what the "Bush doctrine" is. It has changed many times. She asked for clarification; he refused to give it. That is small and petty and not seeking information, that is seeking to trap someone into saying something YOU want them to say. That is phony journalism. True journalism seeks the truth, not to put words in people's mouths.

Again, you leave out all the parts where she explained herself. She is not a hypocrit, any more than Joe Biden is, with his "job does not lend itself to on-the-job training." He hammered Obama's experience during th entire primary, and now that he is the VP candidate he has done a 180 and Obama is the best thing since sliced bread. Hypocrits, anyone? You can't have it both ways.

Ummm...we are not at war with Iran. We are at war IN Iraq. And we have been fighting AL Qaeda in Iraq for the last how many...4 years? If I am not mistaken, Al Qaeda was responsible for 9-11? That is what she meant. She had a better understanding of the question than you apparently did. No offense intended.


Thank you liberal - this joke is old and I
heard it the other way.

For McCain drive with headlights off during day.

For Obama drive with headlights off during the night.

Nothing amusing, just shows what side you support.
This man should be arrested....what a joke
http://www.eclipptv.com/viewVideo.php?video_id=3303&title=Bill_O_Reilly_Bitch_Slaps_Barney_Frank
it was a joke "hon"
d a again.
there is nothing wrong w/it - u just can't take a joke
x
$10 a week-what a joke!
You mean our wonderful $10 a week extra that we are going to get in our paychecks that is going to change our spending habits and boost the economy?  Does Obama really believe giving the american public $10 extra going to stimulate this economy?  Really, how smart a man can he be if he thinks this is really going to help?
Honey, are you sure that is not a joke?...
It speaks of a journalist "sucking his thumb" for awhile and has a white house aide calling Bush "dude". You really can't be this gullible, can you?
i think you missed the joke
The humor of the situation, you see, lies not in who nitpicks whom, but in Ol' Rich Grampa Republican turning his baseball cap sideways and trying to relate to the kids with their crazy new slang. ''Don't be a square, children! Only a hippity-hoppity fresh capital gains tax cut can keep our economy groovy, and keep you in the 40-ounce malt beverages I'm told you people enjoy!''
I gave you a joke......maybe you should
aim your bile at the first poster. While picking up ammo for my handgun last weekend - the salesman said "better stock up before the brownies come for us" - that's a redneck...............aka a$$hole
Very old joke, not funny...
Why post such racist remarks?
Reminds me of the last joke

our dad ever played on us, and it was at his own funeral many years ago.  The guy was a hoot.  Mom had died the year before, so my sister (same Norm Crosby sister) remembered exactly where in the cemetery the double-wide grave was. 


 


Dad’s procession wound through the grounds – he had a lot of friends, so it was a long parade.  The hearse stopped at the newly prepped grave with the canopy over it.  Our limo pulled up behind it.  My sister said, ‘This is the wrong place.’  Her husband said, ‘Nah, this looks like it.’  I had no recollection.  The pallbearers opened the hearse and started hauling the casket out and my sister made her husband go up and tell them to stop.  This was ALL WRONG.  So, they shoved the casket back in, and closed the doors.  Now you see it.  Now you don’t. 


 


All the people behind us started to get our of their cars, and mill around.  My sister went up there and now I could see a lot of gesturing and pointing.  She’s pointing way that-a-way and the cemetery crew are shaking their heads and pointing this-a-way.  So there was an intermission while somebody went to the office for a map. 


 


Now we have the map spread out on the hood of the hearse.  Nobody else in the crowd really knows what’s going on,  and sure enough, wrong grave.  Dad almost got himself interred for eternity next to some other woman.  You’d have to know my dad (and my mom) to get the joke. 


 


We agreed to have the graveside service there, but then he had to be moved to where the backhoe would shortly be hastily digging the grave in the proper location.


 


On the ride back in the funeral home limo we were giggling uncontrollably.  Her husband thought it was in very poor taste.  The limo driver kept remarking on what good sports we were.  Truly, dad almost got away with it.  You just hadda be there!


Reminds me of the very last joke

our dad ever played on us, and it was at his own funeral many years ago.  The guy was a hoot.  Mom had died the year before, so my sister (same Norm Crosby sister) remembered exactly where in the cemetery the double-wide grave was. 


 


Dad’s procession wound through the grounds – he had a lot of friends, so it was a long parade.  The hearse stopped at the newly prepped grave with the canopy over it.  Our limo pulled up behind it.  My sister said, ‘This is the wrong place.’  Her husband said, ‘Nah, this looks like it.’  I had no recollection.  The pallbearers opened the hearse and started hauling the casket out and my sister made her husband go up and tell them to stop.  This was ALL WRONG.  So, they shoved the casket back in, and closed the doors.  Now you see it.  Now you don’t. 


 


All the people behind us started to get our of their cars, and mill around.  My sister went up there and now I could see a lot of gesturing and pointing.  She’s pointing way that-a-way and the cemetery crew are shaking their heads and pointing this-a-way.  So there was an intermission while somebody went to the office for a map. 


 


Now we have the map spread out on the hood of the hearse.  Nobody else in the crowd really knows what’s going on,  and sure enough, wrong grave.  Dad almost got himself interred for eternity next to some other woman.  You’d have to know my dad (and my mom) to get the joke. 


 


We agreed to have the graveside service there, but then he had to be moved to where the backhoe would shortly be hastily digging the grave in the proper location.


 


On the ride back in the funeral home limo we were giggling uncontrollably.  Her husband thought it was in very poor taste.  The limo driver kept remarking on what good sports we were.  Truly, dad almost got away with it.  You just hadda be there!


Barry is a joke for sure...........
--
So much for caring about the troops. You are a joke. nm

Are you kidding me? This joke from a democrat?
Tacky and crude. You're digging deep for insults now and showing your ignorance. If that's your only concern, I'd rather you didn't even vote.
McCain's idea of a joke
Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly? Because her father is Janet Reno.

Delivered to a group of Republicans in 1998 when Chelsea was 18 years old. A letter of apology was hand-delivered to the White House, as confirmed by his press aide Nancy Ives to the Arizona Republic
Joke's on you, if someone you love ends up
dead in some back room or dingy apartment with a coat-hanger up her u-no-wat.

What would you like to see women lose next, their right to vote? Maybe their right to drive? Or to chose whom they marry? Hey, how about bringing female circumcision to the U.S.? Or maybe burkas and veils?
The United Nations has always been a joke.
They never accomplish anything, never take responsibility for anything and want everything for themselves.

There is nothing wrong with Sarah Palin as a VP candidate. Besides, McCain has a right to pick who he wants.
She's a joke America doesn't need
Did anyone actually watch her pathetic attempt at media interviews????  Does anyone really think that because Russia flies over Alaska's air space counts as foreign policy experience?  Nope.  She was picked in the hopes of picking up Hillary's followers.  I cannot stand Hillary Clinton but danged if she doesn't look pretty good to me at the moment!!!!!  At least she has a brain whether I like her or not, more than I can say for "Caribou Barbie" which is a good nick for her I think.