I just need to vent! My 15yo son is going through a tough time. SM

Lately, my son has been hanging with the wrong crowd -- a crowd known to be into pot and drinking, etc.  One of the guys in his group is 23 years old.  I have been doing everything in my power to keep him from this group, restricting him to home after school, not letting him leave the house, but he has become rebellious and basically just walks out even when I tell him to stay.

On Friday, I received a call from the local police telling me they had found my son's backpack in the park -- his name was in it -- and inside the backpack was a bong.  They said they didn't have enough to charge him with anything because since the pack had been sitting in the park, anybody could have put anything in it.  The police office, however, notified the school and the school in turn called me.  I immediately jerked him out of school and took him for a drug test which was negative -- thank goodness!  Still I'm disturbed by all of this. 

I have set him down and told him he is grounded untill further notice and I have come up with a list of who he can hang out with and who he cannot.  One of the boys I am allowing him to be friends with has a single mom and she is basically doing the same things I am doing trying to keep him on the straight and narrow.  We both communicated very well with each other.

However, over the weekend my sister and brother-in-law involved themselves in my business -- which they do quite a lot especially since I literally live three houses down from them.  My brother-in-law absolutely hates me son.  He is an jerk to my son every time my son is around.  My son cannot stand him either ever since he was 3 years old and my BIL slapped him upside the head when we lived with them.  My BIL is a jerk to his own kids, slamming my nephew into walls and choking him, etc.  Anyway, my BIL comes to my house with his chest all puffed up saying he did not want my son around his son (my nephew).  He basically acted like he was father of the year and started to lecture me on what was wrong with my son.  This infuriated me.  He even went as far as to say he did not want my son at his house because he thought he would steal from them!  My son has never stolen anything from anybody -- EVER!

Before I had a chance to respond my phone rang and he was back in his car and gone.  Then he proceeded to talk to the woman whose son I have allowed my son to stay friends with and filled her ear with a bunch of crap and now she is forbidden her son from coming to my house or hanging out with my son.

My sister involved my mother and my mother tells me that my sister didn't want her husband to come to my house and say those things and that she is genuinely worried about my son and that I shouldn't be mad at my sister.  Thing is, my sister hasn't called me to talk about it or tell me that she didn't want her husband to do what he did.  She has just communicated with my mom and that's it.

Anyway, I've just been so upset about all of this and I've been debating on whether or not I should call my sister and tell her what I think of her husband and to tell her husband to mind his business and stay the heck out of mine.

Thanks for letting me vent!

• I just need to vent! My 15yo son is going through a tough time. SM - MissouriMT
  • BIL - amybee
  • Teens!! -- Difficult times for teens and parents. (sm) - No Name
    • Absolutely wonderful advice. nm - trose
  • addendum :-) (sm) - Lisa
  • Honestly, what I think is you need to move (sm) - Lisa
  • why ground him? - see message
    • See, that's was exactly my initial response to the negative drug test. SM - MissouriMT
    • what??? He walks out on his mom when she tells him to stay in the house, and do not ground him???? - anon.
      • she is restricting him from this group; he is rebelling for this reason. - he otherwise did not do anything wrong - N/M
        • I'm sorry, but I just cannot agree with that - sm
  • I am so sorry, what a mess. - sm - mammamt
    • I absolutely would accept any and all prayers. - MissouriMT
      • Consider it done, praying for you and everyone else in this situation - mammamt
  • son - mt
  • You did not mention if a father of your son - Thinking here
    • My ex-husband is mentally ill. I've tried to involve him in this situation... SM - MissouriMT
    • My brother - sm
  • I feel for you sm - MOradMT
    • I agree - sister may be afraid of her husband - Okie MT

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 Sorry I just need to get this out before I explode. I am so mad at my DH right now. I opened my box that he had duct taped all up. I was hoping for something special, well it was a really ugly robe. It is red and has flowers on it. I have never worn red, and don't like flowers on my clothes. Why DH picked something like this is beyond me.

That is all I got, nothing from the kids, nothing else from DH. I just feel like crap. I am so sick and tired of taken second to his stupid cars. He hasn't got a clue why I am ticked at him, the kids are acting like its not a big deal. It just hurts to work so hard on everything and get nothing in return. I got DH everything he wanted, why couldn't I get anything. 

I'm sorry I just needed to get that out. After not getting anything all year for any of the holidays or my birthday, I was just hoping that DH would make up for it at Christmas. But I guess I was wrong. I'm always wrong. Now I have to put on a happy face for a bunch of people coming for dinner. I just feel like crawling back into bed and staying there. 

I went to register my daughter for school this morning.  I was in line to pay for her books when I noticed the man in front of me is listed on our local sexual offender registry for child molestation.  He was there to register his daughter for kindergarten.  After he left, I made the secretary aware.  I came home, looked him up again just to be sure though I thought I was and sure enough, it was him.  I called our local police department because I wanted to be sure of the laws.  It was my understanding that offenders were to be a certain distance away from public parks, schools, etc.  He told me I was correct, though there is a gray area... he was at the school to register his daughter and he is also welcome to attend school functions!!! 

Is it just me or is this not concerning???  I told the police officer I can't believe he would be allowed to do this and don't even get me started on the concern I have for that man's daughter!!!!  I have this horrible picture in my head of attending one of my daughter's school functions and my son somehow meeting up with this man in the bathroom or something!!!  I realize the odds are slim but it still bugs me.  I also realize there are many more sexual offenders than listed in the registry and have discussed this openly with my children but it still upsets me!!

My 8-year-old daughter was bit by a dog a few months ago by a neighbor's dog.  The bite has healed, but the emotional scars haven't.  My daughter is now absolutely terrified of dogs, and cats now, too.  She won't play outside, except in our backyard and won't ride her bike which she absolutely loved before this incident. Before this incident, we were even planning to get a dog.  This is obviously out of the picture now.

Our medical bills totaled over $800 before insurance.  We gave them the bill, wanting $800 because we pay for our insurance on a weekly basis, and they shouldn't benefit from that.  We thought that was more than fair because of the trauma my daughter suffered. 

Well, today, they tried to give us a check for $87!  Yes, that's $87!  I was so insulted by this, and hurt!  All that my daughter went through, they tried to give her an $87 check?!!!  They only want to pay our copay!

Well, I typed up a letter and returned their check, informing them we will be contacting an attorney.  So, instead of the $800 we wanted, I'm sure they'll have to pay a few extra thousand for pain and suffering, and also for the lost wages because we had to miss work because of this.

I can't believe these people! 

Thanks for letting me vent!

Ok, so I need to vent a bit about a friend.  Well, I guess now I should say "former" friend.  Back in February, my husband and I decided that we wanted to use our tax return to install new hardwood floors in our house.  We were talking with our friend about it and she said that her husband was great at installing floors and that he could install them for significantly less than an actual flooring company or other contractor.  We asked her about how much he would charge to do this, and she said about $400.  We had been quoted $1000 and higher by several flooring companies, so we decided to let him install our floors since it would save us a lot of money. 

It took about 4 days to get the floors installed.  In fact, my husband helped quite a bit with the install, plus we ordered him lunch every single day he was here working.  While our new floors were being done, we were also talking about how we were planning to remodel one of the finished rooms in our basement, which is my husband's office/den.  We were planning on hiring someone for this  We even already had an appointment scheduled with a company to come give us an estimate the next day.  Our friend's husband again said that he could do this significantly less as well.  He said that he would charge around $500 to put up new sheet rock and install the new laminate flooring that we had already purchased.  We asked him multiple times if he was 100% sure that he could do it for that cheap.  He said yes and insisted on doing it.  We agreed to this and let him do the work in our basement as well.  We paid him a total of $1000 cash for all of his work, which is what he asked for, plus bought him lunch every day and helped him with the labor ourselves. 

Well, a few weeks ago our friend started acting very strangely around us.  We didn't know what was up and she wasn't telling us.  In fact, she started completely ignoring us and not answering our phone calls, text messages, or emails for days.  We later found out from her husband that she had been laid off from her job and was too embarassed to tell anyone.  She did finally come out and tell us about it after about 2 weeks had gone by. 

About a week after she told us about losing her job, we got a phone call from her and she said that we didn't pay her husband enough for the work that he did in the basement, so she wanted us to give HER a check for $300!!!  We told her that we had already paid her husband $1000, which is what he quoted us and he had been very happy with that, especially since he really needed the money.   We told her that it was simply not in our budget to just give her $300 and basically told her sorry, but no way. 

This morning, we woke up to someone banging on our front door and ringing the door bell over and over again, which caused our 2 dogs to start barking like crazy.  Both my husband and I work really late hours and we were both sound asleep.  In fact, my husband had just done a double shift a the hospital he works at and didn't get home until about 7:30 this morning.  We had no idea who it could be, so I got up to answer the door, and there was our friend standing there.  I let her in and she said, "I've been banging on the door forever!  You're probably just ignorning me because you think I'm here to collect money."  I was in total shock.  We had been sound asleep and didn't even hear anything until she really started banging hard on the door.  She then went on to say how incredibly rude we were and how ridiculous we were being for ignoring her.  We weren't even ignoring her!  We haven't even heard from her in weeks and she just showed up this morning without even calling first when she KNEW we would most likely be sleeping!   I was half asleep and she was ranting on and on about how rude we were being and how she would help us out if we needed money.  That let the cat out of the bag right there.  The money that she wanted was for HER and NOT for her husband!  She was just using him as a cover to get us to give her $300!   She then said, "I also need to borrow your Windows Vista CD and I'll be back later for it and expect it to be waiting for me, unless you're going to be ignorant about that and not give it to me."  She then stormed out the door and left.

Let that be a lesson to never hire your friends to do work for you!!!!  She had been our best friend for about 7 years and now we want nothing to do with her.  Sorry this was a bit long, but I needed to vent somewhere!

Today is invoice day & got up extra early to get started as I will have my 5 month old grandson tonight & kids will play with him until bedtime, BUT .. I can't sign in to work, got up at 5a.m., still can't get connected, emailed boss & tech support, nobody on IM.. plus can't get on the other IM thru work because I have to be signed in.. ggrrrrr.. okay, hopefully I can get on soon.. here it is almost 11:00.. I could've had 6 hours in already.. geez.. what a day.. okay, sorry about that, but needed to tell somebody.. hope everyone is having a better day than I am..

I am so fustrated. I recently started a custom accessory buiness online. I have a myspace page and a website. I have had the worst luck getting this thing up and running. I mean, I know the economy is bad, but I have had THE WORST luck. I would be happy with just a few orders a month. Nothing. And believe me I have put the website out there. I submitted it to Google, Yahoo, and MSN. THey still haven't posted it yet I don't think. I am at my wit's end. Anybody who has ever submitted a website know how long it takes for them to put it up?

There are others who do similar products as me. They have orders right and left. I cannnot figure it out. And mine are cheaper. I am about ready to throw in the towel. I don't know what else to do. I'm sorry to whine here but gosh I need to vent. There is nothing like putting your all into something and nothing happens.

tough for IRS to track you - not tough at all....they will catch you eventually if you are IC and don't pay taxes.

tough for you to track how to pay, when, etc.??  Also not tough.  Every time you get a check, take about 35% of that and put it in a savings account.  You could probably get away with paying yearly for awhile but safest bet is to pay quarterly.  Download forms from IRS or your tax program and you can print a payment coupon. 

You may want to do a search on the main board on this subject.  It has been discussed.  Some put aside 25%, some 30%, some 35%.  Some pay quarterly, some yearly.  Depends on if co-file and if that person takes money out of his/her check to cover part of your taxes.

One of the defining moments of my life was when I saw my son's tiny heart fluttering on an ultrasound screen. Up to then, although I had known I was pregnant (I was 8 weeks), the reality of it hadn't hit me, not in the way that it did when I saw that tiny beating heart.

I am definitely not pro-choice but I am not radically pro-life either. What I do oppose is additional governmental inference in our lives. So, as I said, this is a tough one....my heart says "yes" but my head says "no".

My thoughts are when the children are small, they won't care if you live in a tent in a national park (in fact, they would probably prefer it).  When they are teens, it doesn't matter where you/they live, they are going to complain about it.  Bill Gates' kids will probably be asking why can't they live in a normal house like all their friends, and why do they have to have such a large carbon footprint? 

We lived in a single family home with lots of acreage.  Some of the kids' best friends lived in apartments in the city as well as mobile home parks.  It made no difference whatsoever to them about the living circumstances of their friends and their friends' parents, and they stayed over at those friends just as often as those friends stayed over with us.  Our house at that time was *very* nice and we had 4 or 5 horses at all times for riding, but were our kids impressed by that?  No, they complained because we were hicks because we had chickens in our yard and their city friends did not.

I think the bottom line is wherever you are the happiest is where they will be the happiest.

Relatives can really get on your nerves - one of the reasons we live 500 miles away from my relatives and 750 miles away from my husband's relatives. They're great in small doses, but not as a steady diet.

So I really do understand....but I think it's interesting that you chose a time when you are not in a position to offer to have dinner at your house to object to what is being planned, especially since it is the "usual thing". Obviously, for whatever reason, your MIL and SIL don't like to cook, and your MIL has decided to take the easy way out and do "what we do every time".

Next time family visits, after your renovations are done, why not ask your MIL and SIL to bring a salad, side dish, dessert, whatever?  And, as suggested here, there's no reason why you can't have both pizza and KFC.  Just because your MIL doesn't want it, that doesn't mean that no one else will.  Sometimes you just have to go ahead and do something and not ask for "permission" - especially since your MIL seems (on the basis of this one incident) to be a bit of a control freak.  If she says anything to you, you can just say, "I thought it would be nice to have a bit of variety" or "I didn't want to say anything to you, but pizza gives me heartburn" (true in my case ).  Whatever works for you.

And HAPPY EASTER!!

New year at baseball with kid, new other parents to meet and talk with.  I'm talking with this odd mother, taking a head count as to how many grubby little home-schooled children she has:  Seven and one more on the way!  Husband is there, unemployed, has a paper route.  Subsidized housing, welfare, food stamps, and then he tells me the state just gave him a check for $900 to get his car fixed.  Are you kidding me?!?  Shut the Front Door! 

Something about a hard, honest days' work just aint right.  grrrrhhh....

My daughter is in the 1st grade.  While in  kindergarten her teacher became ill and was out of the classroom more than in it for over a month and then ended up having to leave permanently after being out for 2 months.  During this time they had parapros in the classroom but all of the kids in her class got behind because of the inconsistent teaching.  Finally in March they split the class up and moved the kids into other classrooms, but by the end of the year each of the 15 kids were behind their peers because of the true instruction time they had missed, through no fault of their own.

Now fast forward to 1st grade.  Some of the kids had managed to catch up but others haven't, including my daughter.  She is now reading on a level 3 and should be on a level  5 or 6.  Math-wise she is way behind as well as her reading level is below normal.   She is currently in a classroom with 27 kids and has ADD, but it is very easily managed when she is given tasks in small increments and visual cues to work with (i.e. write math problems for her and she can do them but ask her to do them in her head and she struggles).  

My husband & I met with the school yesterday because of the concerns about her being behind and in the student support team meeting, consisting of the school system psychologist, special education teacher, her teacher, principal and vice principal, we were told that they don't have the resources to work with her to meet her needs and that by the No Child Left Behind federal laws they don't have to address her needs individually until she is 6 months to a year behind her peers.   Why do they WANT kids to get this behind before helping them?   We know she is smart - she has an IQ of 92, but she needs to have the distractions caused by the 26 kids in her classroom removed and they won't do anything about it because all other 1st grade classes have 26 kids, and the only one that doesn't have that many is a class full of kids that are learning English.    We are working with her at home but it's ridiculous to send her to school 7 hours a day and then tutor her at home because  the teacher won't take 2 minutes to explain instructions on a task to her.   I told them that I don't want her to have to go to special education in the future because she's behind and that I'd prefer that a way to get her caught up and kept on level with where she would be should be what the goal is - not wait until she's very behind.  Their response was "well over the upcoming Holidays we can send home LOTS of things for you to work on with her."  

Home schooling isn't a good option for her and her psychologist has agreed that she needs the classroom interaction with other kids.  If it weren't for that I'd home school her in a nannosecond, even if that meant giving up everything outside of my regular work day to educate her. 

I've talked to a couple of private schools in the area and one school wasn't really any better, has 1 teacher per 20 kids in 1st grade.  The other school could take her and has currently 5 kids per teacher for 1st grade with good test results .  It's ridiculous that we're being forced to consider paying for private school because the public schools don't care.

I'm sure others have run into these same type of situations.  What did you do - continue working with the public schools, turn to home schooling or private school?

I wasn't sure were to post this...

My sister was just at the bank and while she was leaving she noticed a male banker staring at her. A couple of minutes later she gets a phone call from this banker telling her if she ever needs anything to call him. She asaked if he does this with all the people that bank and he said no just the pretty ones.

He did NOT help her when she was there so he had to have had the banker that helped her reopen her account and get ALL of her information. This is soooooo BAD  ! She lives alone. How can this man do this I believe he was a manager or something not just a regular employee. UUUHHHHHH!!!!!! My mom use to be a banker so I told my sis to call her and see what she should do but my mom is pretty passive so I'm not sure what she will say. This makes me so angry to think that he has ALL her information UHHHH! This is sooo wrong!

My sis is only 21 and lives alone. She has already had one scare at her apartment and I'm sure she will feel unsafe once again. I don't know why this man thinks he can do this!

I just had to get this out.

The reason is to conserve energy.  You might even save a few bucks. But on the other hand, I'm sure they didn't think of what a major inconvenience it would be to turn your clocks ahead a little bit early. 

A few weeks ago we were having a visiting choir at our church.  We were feeding dinner them after the performance.  During Sunday school we discussed what each person would bring.  We wanted to do sandwiches, salads, and desserts.  I volunteered to bring chicken salad and pimento cheese sandwhiches.  MIL is in the same class and heard myself and hubby say it twice.  She chose to bring the same thing.  Okay, not a big deal, but this is what happened yesterday.  Earlier in the week my MIL gave me a church cookbook from another church.  While we were talking I flipped through the cookbook (this is the size of a hymnal) and saw a reciepe for "blueberry pound cake".  It looked delicious and I even said "I have fresh blueberries in the fridge, this will be great for the picnic on Sunday."  I also made a couple of other things as everyone always brings 2-3 dishes.  Walked in to church yesterday and my MIL announced she had made "blueberry pound cake from the new cookbook".  I did not say a word, but caught hubby in parking lot and told him to put the cake back in the car. 

We had a neighborhood block party last night so I knew I could take it there.  Honestly, her cake was a bit dry, I truely think due to the reciepe and not her cooking.  I guess it worked out becuase I went home and used a few more berries to make a sauce which helped the cake and it was a big hit at the block party. 

I know this is really minor, so please don't fry me for this, but I really needed to vent and I don't want to vent to my hubby.  Thanks for listening.

The LeapFrog Tag thingy.  I saw them at Wal-Mart and it looks like certain books work with it.  I saw the advertisement and thought it was neat until that crazy man in the lizard costume  or whatever it is insinuated that books are boring unless they can be used by that talking pen. I cannot figure out how that thing helps kids learn to read as it says it does.  It looks to me like that pen reads for them.  My 6-year-old is in first grade and they are trying to teach her to read by phonics.  So when she and I read together whenever she stumbles across a word I have her try to look at it and sound it out before I will give her an answer and most of the time she can.  I think I am just frustrated by that whole industry now anyway because I have had salespeople come to my door basically telling me that my kid is going to be a dumbazz if I don't buy their expensive junk....all the other kids have it and mine will be left out in the cold.  I guess I am not giving those electronics a chance.  I cannot see what they can do for my child that I cannot. 

I have tried twice to tell this story but deleted it both times because the story is just too long so I will be as short as I can. 

I have a bunch of ROTTEN TO THE CORE sisters.  My sisters are just about the worst people I have ever met in my whole 43 years on this planet.  There is one who is especially bad and I just told my other sister that if she ever dies, to please not call me as I won't come to any wake or funeral for her because I HATE her guts.  I come from a very large family with 5 sisters and 1 brother with my brother being the oldest.  He is not involved.  He sort of "left" the family years ago because he couldn't take the bulls**t of my sisters anymore.  They did terrible things to him after his divorce.  We rarely see him now.  I am considered a scumbag and a loser because my husband and I don't make a lot of money.  We don't own a home.  We don't have gorgeous cars.  We can't give our 3 children everything they want and we can only give them small amounts of what they actually need, but we do try.  We love our children with everything in our souls.  They have made fun of me and my husband and insulted us to our faces.  My husband and I have a difficult marriage as he is tough to get along with so they hate my husband's guts.  My sisters have all gone out to dinner without inviting me.  I have found out because of someone's slip of the tongue.  They have made threats and sent rumors flying throughout the family, without me knowing, about calling DCYF on me.  I heard that one too from a slip of the tongue.  I cried for 2 hours in the shower that day.  They talk about everyone and I mean everyone badly.  They have a well known reputation in a couple of our towns here for being mean horrible girls.  They are about as fake and phony as a person can get.  Sweet and all smiles to your face and when you turn around, they stick that knife in as far as they can get it in.  They have what they have in their lives because of what someone has given them.  My sister had her property given to her by her in-laws.  It is worth about $1,000,000.  My other sister had land given to her by her husband's family so they could build their house and then his parents used to come over with BIG fat checks "to lessen their mortage burden" so now they owe almost nothing on their $500,000 house.  They think they are fabulous people.  They think they are the cat's meow.  In the past years when we were all talking and I would be invited to a holiday, I was not spoken to at all the whole time I was there.  I am a venter and I always have been so if my husband and I are fighting, I will always go to my older sister (one up from me) and vent and vent until I can't talk anymore because I just get so angry.  She gets on the phone the second I leave and tells every person in my family what is going on.  They in turn judge me and my husband, make their threats, and so on.  This is also happening to my oldest sister and her partner (she is in a gay relationship but was always dating a man and was married twice) and my sister's daughter and her family.  The three of us, me, my sister and her partner, and my sister's daughter and her family, talk.  We get along well.  We are happy with each other.  We don't judge each other.  Whatever happens in each other lives, we just accept it and don't judge each other because we realize that each other has their own life and they will deal with whatever comes on their own with their own family in their own way.  I now attend holidays at my sister's daughter's home.  I don't leave her house after a holiday feeling lonely or sad or angry because no one would speak to me.  I don't feel judged.  The sisters (I like to call them the Witches of Eastwick) all attend holidays with each other up at my sister's husband's family's cabin in the mountains.  The three of us are not invited.  My older sister has a son.  Several yeas ago, my sister and her partner had a terrible fight with him.  He went to the witches and told them a bunch of lies and now they have pretty much shunned her and her daughter and me too because we still talk to her.  I have a sister, who is involved in all of this, that I speak to on a regular basis.  She is close to my kids or at least my oldest son.  She pretty much ignores my other two children and they tell me, It's alright mommy, we know Aunty Becky hates us."  She is the one who has spread rumors about me in the family trying to get everyone to call DCYF on me.  I heard this too by a slip of the tongue from another sister a few years back.  I tend to be a forgiving person so I quietly forgave her for this without her ever knowing that I knew what she was trying to do.  Now that they are all inviited to the holidays up to my sister's cabin up north, this rotten sister of mine (the one closest to my son) has 3 cats that are fed twice a day.  They are extremely fat just like her.  These holiday trips up north are usually kept quiet and I only know about it the day before they are leaving to go, which is when she inevitably asks me to come feed her f******g cats.  This is how I know that a big party is going on up at the cabin and once again only the chosen selected few are going.   This is usually for 3 or 4 days and they get fed twice a day so I have to go to her house twice a day.  Sometimes I have to give them medication and the last time she asked me, I even had to soak her sick cat's feet in medicine.  She lives about 20 minutes away from me.  This girl would NEVER, NEVER, EVER do this for me.   My husband and I took our children on a cruise 3 years ago and we have a cat and I never asked her to do this for me as I know she would have laughed in my face.  I have been feeding her cats for years now when she goes away.  Keep in mind though that she was in the select chosen few to be invited up to the cabin.  I was not as I am considered trash in the family.  I am SICK AND TIRED of feeding this girl's cats so SHE can go up north to have fun with the family on the holidays.  My sister who invites everyone to go is a mean, horrible, sadistic, vicious, backstabbing wretched b***h.  No one will say anything to her like, "Gee Pat, where is everyone else?  Didn't you invite this one, and this one, and this one?"  They could care less.  All they know is that THEY were invited. 

Anyway, I am sorry this is so long.  I can't take my sisters anymore.  I have been thinking of this all day all weekend long.  I am really to the point where I just don't want to see them ever again.  I am going to tell my fat a** b***h sister to fnd another way to get her cats fed because I'm not doing it anymore!!  She is just using me and believe me when I tell you, she enjoys it.  She is very diabolical.  She loves it that I am not invited and she and her husband are.  She even questions me and counts the cat food cans to make sure that I came on all of the days they were gone.  These people have balls of brass and I have had ENOUGH.  I am just sitting and waiting patiently for the next time she says, "Oh, we're going up north for a few days.  Can you come and feed the cats?"  I just can't wait to see the look on her face when I simply say, "No.  I can't.  I will never feed your cats again!  Find some other sucker to do it!"

I believe that they are severely narcissistic people and this is nothing to take lightly. These types of people are very destructive.  Do any of you have family members like this and what do you do about them?  How do you stop them from making you feel sad, lonely, excluded and less than you are or deserve?  I think it is time for me to cut all ties with them.  I just can't take their crap anymore and I do think I would be much, much happier and calmer. 

A friend of ours died of pancreatic cancer. Went to the funeral, fully expecting to see her husband - they were together since high school, kids, grandkids. Turned out he divorced her & left town when she got the diagnosis.

What a scumbag. I can't think of words bad enough. Just needed to tell somebody.