She is a grown woman and all you

• At my wit's end - Christmas and my daughter is impossible!
  • I would tell her the invitation is there and - sm - millie
  • You've done all you can... - MQQA
  • She is a grown woman and all you - kt
  • at your Wits End? .... about what? - this is a mole hill. nm
    • May be a mole's hill to you but - Christmas and my daughter is impossible!
      • It is a sad situation, however, you cannot - jd
  • I was with you until you said...... - ex
    • But, she and her ex are on excellent terms - Christmas and my daughter is impossible!
      • kids - ex

The messages you are viewing are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select the boards given in left menu

This has nothing to do with being a christian, it has more to do with group dynamics. I have to deal with it all the time with 6 women in an in-law situation. They are narrow-minded Bible-thumping bigots.I happen to be of another "denomination" and I do attend every function of theirs, weddings, funerals, all of it, receive their communion. I have had my parents die, lost my younger sister and many things happen where they could have reciprocated, yet they will not "step foot" in my church. So where is all their faith, they certainly are not practicing the do unto others. I can relate, it is a horrible way to live. Thank God, I had psychology courses and know about group dynamics, I am in the middle of a herd mentality. I could go on forever, they even have "interventions" when someone in their family wants to marry or date someone not from their denomination. They are awful. I know your pain! It's not your imagination, they hide behind their cohesive "numbers game," one speaks and all the others agree in unison. No one has a chance against this mob. It's tough to be your own person, lots of tears. And guys think it's all in our heads - NOT!  Hang in, perhaps you'll have a Divine Intervention somehow.

follow the rules of the house then you have to make them get out on there own.  I have two sons.  We had to make both of them leave.  The only rules we had were if you are not coming home, let us know.  I always told them to give me a "ballpark" time when they would be home and if they were not going to come home then, just call me.  I didn't really ask where they were at, kind of silly for 20 year old boys and they can tell you anything.  But, for their own safety I told them always let someone know when you are NOT coming home.  They didn't want to go by those rules and threw fits and we had to put them both out (not at the same time of course, they are different ages).  The youngest is now a firefighter (32 years old), married, has his own business on the side.  The oldest has his own business, lives out of state.  They both did very well. 

I see too many 40 year old kids living at home sponging off mom and dad and will never get anywhere doing that.  It is a pattern they just keep doing over and over again.

Now if they are in school and doing well, working or not working depending on the school situation, I would not put them out UNLESS they didn't follow my rule and then I would not care if school was involved or not.  I think this is why we have so many kids who will not grow up because we enable them to be this way.  Just my opinion though.  I didn't say it was easy, but it is necessary.

True, not all families are the Cleavers. However, your tone comes accross very unloving towards your children. I find that sad. My oldest son (29) died in an accident. Open up and let your children get to know you before it is too late. Don't sweat the small stuff. Life is simply too short.

Lilly

I definitely would not put up with the 19-yo.  He can get out and get a job.  As for your daughter, I feel for her b/c she has kids.  I'm not sure that I'd let her move in, though.  She should look for some place cheaper to live.  Offer to keep her kids for a day while she house hunts or apartment hunts.  I also understand what she's going through with childcare expense.  How old is the child she's asking you to watch this summer?  Is he/she old enough to entertain himself -- 10 or 11? -- old enough to fix himself a lunchmeat sandwich and watch TV?  If so, then I think if you could, you should consider watching him over the summer.  $250 may not seem like much, but if she's able to find somewhere cheaper to live, it could be the difference between living on her own or moving in with you. 

Obviously, you are under no obligation to help either of your children, but I suspect this situation bothers you because you care for them greatly.  Maybe a compromise could work to benefit both of you.  Good luck!

Anyone who thinks their kids are bad - well get this 3 BROTHERS here 10, 12 and 14 charged with crimes related to their breaking and entering and then completely destroying a Headstart school. They threw not only paint and other solvents over the place but also left own bodily fluids such as feces and urine, totally destroying computers, games, floors, the whole building, probably over $100,000 damage. I thank my lucky stars I do not have to even think about putting up with that.

x

Spend some time together.

Give each little young lady a handmade card/voucher that she can cash in to spend time with you one-on-one, whether it be at the hair salon, lunch, walking in the park, just doing regular shopping stuff, going to a play or just sitting, talking, having a cup of tea and looking through family albums....It's the special time that'll be cherished. 

Oh, and 50-ish is not old.....I know 70 to 85-yo young ladies who can run circles around me with their enthusiasm, drive, ambition and joy for life.   Cat 

graduated college last year?  She was all over the news, GOD BLESS HER!!  Had all her wits about her......just old looking is all....

Education doesn't stop until we die - so by all means 40+ is still young in that many change career directions many times in ones' life...

That an employee told her to use the MRI machine at the zoo?

When a 5-foot, 275-pound woman found out she had a tumor on her spine, she was told by her local hospital to go the zoo to have a MRI because a regular MRI machine could not hold her weight, myfoxkc.com reported.

Carolyn Ragan told the television station she discovered the tumor two years ago and, after the hospital told her she could not use their MRI machine, a medical assistant said he would help her find a solution.

“So he suggested the Kansas City Zoo,” Ragan said. “I thought, I know I’m big, but I’m not as big as an elephant. And my husband got mad.”

The University of Kansas Hospital would not comment on Ragan’s claim, but said its MRI department does not know of any animal MRI in the Kansas City area that would scan a human.

Ragan’s problem was two-fold: She was too heavy for the table and too wide to slide through the opening.

Medical Imaging in Kansas City North, which has both closed and open MRI machines can typically hold up to 440 pounds, but sometimes a person who weighs less can still be out of luck, according to an MRI technician.

“It depends on how they are built a lot of times and what part of their body we’re scanning,” said technician Sarah Abbott of Medical Imaging. “(The machine) can only be so open before the magnetic field dissipates into the room.”

Ragan, who ended up having two surgeries and some paralysis, said she finally found an open MRI machine that held her weight, but it was embarrassing and frustrating.

“They should have machines that fit most everybody,” she said.

My kids were out of clothes.  Yes, I'm behind on laundry.  So I wash some stuff, toss it in the dryer and I hear something going "ping" and it won't turn on.  I just pulled it completely apart, put it back together and it's working.  Yeah me!  A screw had come out and fallen down inside of it.  I can't believe how full of lint the inside was too.    I do, however, have 6 extra screws that should be in there somewhere lol.