To all you married moms with kids and hubby at home,
Posted By: annabanana on 2007-10-17
In Reply to:
do you ever dream about living by yourself? Not just with no kids, but with no hubby either? I love my family, but when I feel overwhelmed, when life gets too stressful, I can't help but think how peaceful that kind of life would be, with just myself to take care of. Of course I know in my heart that if I was by myself I would be bored and lonely, but right now it sounds really good! It has been one of those days...
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Rainy, cool, dark. Home working with plenty of work. Hubby and kids are sm
picking up toys, taking them to Goodwill. LOVE days like this.
any moms out there with kids
How did you know they were "model material?" My 9-year old Corbin Blue look- alike wants to go for an open call at our local talent agency. He has the personality for it and i think he's gorgeous, but of course I'm biased!!!
Any tips for going to a call?
After 2000 when I married my hubby, he
first bought me a 2002 and then last year a 2006. I am so spoiled. Keep working hard and like I said, one day maybe your dreams can come true. Mine have. All my wishes have come true. Don’t hate because you are poor!
I'm 20 months older than my hubby, married 23 years so far! -nm
x
Well I figure I can make my own hours & be home when the kids are home (sm)
I worked PT in an office for a while but spent most of my money on childcare in the summer. Full-time in an office was just a nightmare and I felt like I missed a whole year of my children's lives. I want to be in control of my schedule so that's why I'm looking into the cleaning thing. Never thought I would want to do that but live and learn! Some of the most intelligent people alive work as carpenters and similar things because they have learned what's really important in life. Whew....off my soapbox now :-) Good luck to you!
Bra till hubby gets home, then I flash him!
 Of course, other than his palms for support!!!!!!   - LOL
I had a home when we married, stability yes and the cars
I had 2, a van and a bigger vehicle, both on their last tires. He first bought me a green Toyota, glad to get that and then went and traded for a silver BMW. I did not have a clue as to what he had bought me. That was 9 years ago and since that time he has bought me 2 more brand new BMWs. I am not looking that gift horse in the mouth! He is a jewel who had been my friend before marriage and I was not looking for anyone to marry when he happened along. Best move I ever made when I suggested marriage. Married in Las Vegas and happy ever since. I am finally spoiled and loving it.
I'm married and don't have kids, so
I'm sure people are very curious as to why I don't have kids. And yet, very few people are bold enough to ask me since they don't know if I've been unable or what the problem is. Maybe they feel free to ask why you aren't married because getting married seems to be going out of style or something, and they really want to know why married people are the minority now.
My now deceased husband brought his friend home, now my hubby
Was it love at first sight? Not for me but years later after the death of the previous one, my now husband (he never married, no kids) told me he had loved me from the very first day he saw me. I did not even know he saw me. We are talking 30 more years and the weight, well I will just leave at the 30+ years.
My kids have their own places - one is married, one is not...sm
but they both still have a key to our house. There have been several occasions when that has come in handy for me and them as well. I think it all depends on what works best for you and your son.
I bought that for my hubby on the Wii. He and the kids love it!
I bet you will like it too!
While traveling or eating out my hubby, kids, and I love
to decide what we would do if we won the lottery. From the sesnsible to the outrageous. We have been doing this for several years and it is wild how thier tastes have changed with age. It is really a lot of fun.
Nope, thank God! Happily married for 24+ and haven't had to bail kids out...yet..:) nm
s
Are you the Anon who was worried abt possibly violence or hubby taking your kids? m
Best of luck to you for taking the steps to change your life. I wish you well.
Going to be 29 years in May, married as kids(!), it depends on what shifts we are working/overtime,
All in all, three kids later, it is "whenever," sometimes frequent, sometimes just being able to snuggle and be lone together is what we need!
Absolutely, but I shake myself out of it quickly to make it a happy time for my kids and hubby. nm
x
My favorite time of night is when kids and hubby are asleep and the house is quiet...
Usmoms need some quiet time too...don't feel bad for feeling that way...I am sure we have all imagined what it would be like not having kids or a husband...but then that thought goes away and someone yells "Mommy" or "Honey"...LOL...
kids at home
When I began working at home, my children were 7 and 12, and I was also a single ma, but they were old enough to not be watched every single second. At first, I had my computer in my kitchen, then my family room, which the kids were usually in if they were not outside, and I could see my back yard perfectly at either place.
I stopped often, to answer questions, help, make breakfast, lunch, etc., but when I compared my interruptions to the alternative, working at the hospital, my interruptions were worth it, especially during the summer or when they were ill. There is a fine line between letting your children feel that you are not to be bothered during work. You don't want them to ever feel that they cannot come to you with a question or problem. Sure, I remember feeling frustrated and maybe venting when I wish I could have been more patient, and I felt like some days were not near as productive as during the school year when they were in school, but it was worth it to me. Sometimes I even told them not to bother me unless they were bleeding or the house was on fire, but that is not wise.
Most of the time I remained honest with them, telling them that "mommy's gotta finish this report, honey, hold on and when I finish this report, I will talk to you."
I tried to be as proactive as possible, even though I am a huge procrastinator, and I would maybe make sandwiches ahead of time, pack a lunch for them, just like on school days.
I would use my breaks to maybe run them to a friend's house, go pick up a friend or to drop them off at the golf course (of course when they were older and not driving) and then come back home and work, sometimes maybe only an hour until it started raining.
Oh, I should probably tell you though, now they are 19 and 25, and they don't bother me at all anymore......
Do you have kids that were home
from school yesterday? I did and that's why I think today feels like Monday. Although, I haven't had the day you're having. I hope things are better this afternoon. If you have some tea around, try a cup. Sometimes it makes you feel more relaxed. Have a great afternoon!!!
Kids at home while you work? How do you (sm)
make sure they know you are "at work" even though you are right there? I have worked at home in the past but had issues with this. Mine are old enough now to be home while I work (10 & 7), but I would love any ideas of how to make sure they respect my work hours. Any ideas?
PA too and our kids were actually sent home early
due to the heat! We were never sent home for that one. Spent the day at the pool with the kids and now it's time to work.
Would you ever kick your kids out of your home?
Are your kids welcome to stay in your home for as long as they like?
My 15 year old asked if we'd ever kick him out or his older brother. I said they'd always have a home with us as long as they follow our rules.
No glad my kids are grown and out of home...
Anyone who thinks their kids are bad - well get this 3 BROTHERS here 10, 12 and 14 charged with crimes related to their breaking and entering and then completely destroying a Headstart school. They threw not only paint and other solvents over the place but also left own bodily fluids such as feces and urine, totally destroying computers, games, floors, the whole building, probably over $100,000 damage. I thank my lucky stars I do not have to even think about putting up with that.
She has 2 wonderful kids whom she home schools
They are ages 13 (boy) and 10 (girl). My sister died at age 27 of cancer and left a husband and 8 yo boy. My sister was also 6 months pregnant when they found the cancer and she lost the little girl after going to MD Anderson and all the treatment, and my sister only lived 6 months.
There is such a concern here because of my having kidney cancer and given 6 months to live, but I have been in remission for 4 years now.
My sister had breast cancer, in remission for 5 years.
I am open to any help anyone has, be it good or bad. Thanks.
Any kids with wife#2 are living at home and being
Kids should not expect to college paid for, so hubby should not pay for college for kids with wife#2 since he did not pay for college for kids with wife #1.
There's lots of things kids can do at home
all summer that are worthwhile and free. Take them to the library once every week or two and get them reading! Where I lived as a kid it was hot all day, so I read all day and played outside in the evening when it was cooler. It doesn't have to be books, either. It can be magazines, comics, or whatever. Just the 'reading' part is the key. I used to read and re-read old comic books, Life magazines, National Geographics, and books on animals and earth sciences. I also think I read Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn multiple times each during the summer.
Kids can put on a neighborhood circus (and make some cash by charging admission). They can put on a pet show. We used to have pet shows, haunted houses, dog shows, cat shows, talent contests, bike races and foot races, too, and hurdles contests.
With some scrap wood, hammers, nails, etc., (if they're not too small) they can build things. We all had tree houses in just about every large tree in the neighborhood. My friend built a go-cart, and I built a wooden wagon. I also collected rocks, and used that wagon to haul home my latest acquisitions from around the neighborhood. (Much to my mother's dismay... she apparently didn't have the 'rock-gene' that my siblings and I all seem to carry!) Starting collections of any type (even if it's not rocks) can be a fun summer pastime.
Making mud pies and cookies was fun, as was collecging pollywogs and watching them magically turn into frogs.
A job such as painting a fence (a-la Tom Sawyer) can be a messy but fun experience for kids. Or, creating a mural.
Art projects are fun, too. How about giving each kid a journal to write their private thoughts and dreams in? Or, an older child can be taught the basics of cooking or sewing, which will come in handy some day when they're older. You could also teach hand-sewing, beading, embroidery, etc., and let kids make themselves a T-shirt or tank top, shorts, etc. that is work of wearable art.
Or, how about starting a veggie garden for the kids to take care of? They could also be involved in cooking and eating what they grow.
Even though it seems useless, the down-time in the summer, spent just doing NOTHING, isn't as bad as it appears, and when kids don't have every minute booked up for planned activities, they learn to explore what's interesting to them, and amuse themselves.
its better to raise kids in a happy divorced home
Help! Pushy parents think I work from home and can drive their kids etc
I am constantly being asked to watch people's kids because I work from home. The latest is a friend of my son attending the same camp in another town. The friend I will call Scotty. Scotty has two parents. His father works from home as a computer consultant. My friends and I have called Scotty's dad to work on our computers and he never even returns the call or shows up. Scotty's mom recently asked me if I could drive her son home from them because the dad gets busy and doesn't like to leave clients. I told her that I too am working from home and have to minimize my time in the car. Scotty does not live close to us. I feel like a big meanie but they have pushed me before. Last year our kids were not even in the same camp but the mom called and asked if I would drive and pick up her son every day because i live in the same town as the camp. I was like ??? no way.
They used to drop Scotty off at my house on school holidays. They would drop him off at 7 AM and then once the mom called me at 5 PM and said she wanted to get an oil change and asked me if I could keep scotty until 7:30 PM. I said NO and then she came to pick him up earlier but stayed at my house uninvited until 9:30 when I just said I HAVE TO GO TAKE A SHOWER.
Anyone have clever ways to handle these situations?
Grownups-My Cousin Vinnie, older kids - Home Alone One sm
A Christmas Story is our holiday favorite to watch with little kids and we love when the dogs eat the turkey and they have to go out for Chinese! We have the lamp ornament on our tree.
Poll for parents with school aged kids at home...sm
1. What ages are your kids?
2. Do they have their own cell phone?
3. Do they have their own TV and or computer in their room? If so, are there set hours they're allowed to use these:
4. Do they receive an allowance? If so, are they required to do chores to receive this?
As for our house, here's the answers. Kids are 15 and 8. 15-year-old has a cell phone and pays her bill. 15-year-old has a TV. The kids share 1 PC that is where we can see what they're doing on it, and they're limited to no more than an hour a day on it if it's a school day. We do have parental controls in place. They don't receive an allowance but they are aware of a special chores list that they can choose to do extra things around the house to make money. They are required to keep their rooms and bathrooms cleaned, as well as alternate cleaning up the kitchen after dinner.
Staying at home and raising us kids worked for my mother
Hmm. It should be okay with me right? Oh, wait, that puts me in the welfare line which you think everyone takes advantage of.
You don't live in your mother's time. I wish you did, because the internet didn't exist then.
Sounds like my kids...on a school day "we just got home from school!" on a vacation day....sm
But this is our vacation! My husband takes vacation days and leaves town without us...lol! He would never dream of taking a day off to work around the house!
Not sure who look like their moms, but maybe have some
character traits of their mothers.
I do know, some men look at the girl's mother to see what the girl will look like when she is older. If her mother is attractive, that certainly helps.
Question for you moms out there...sm
1. Did you have a lot of morning sickness?
2. How many weeks did it last, i.e. from 4 to 12 weeks pregnant or what?
Strippers can be moms too.
nm
Not so much our moms as we just try to teach
xx
Question for moms
 I have a question for mothers out there, I am 29 years old. My husband and I have been married for over 8 years almost 9 we are just now trying to have a baby. While we are excited about this we are also very nervous. I really love my husband and we have good marriage, I am so nervous about how a baby will change our marriage. I know it sounds selfish but I want to be a good wife when we have a child. Are these normal feelings? TIA!!
Moms are in charge of the fun!
What are your summer fun plans?
Free days at local attractions, or something bigger?
At my house we will be taking a week to explore our own state, which is pretty big!
Mean moms/childhood
I often questioned God why after 14 years of trying to get pregnant, I never did, then my uterus prolapsed and I had to have a hysterectomy.
I look at my childhood and it had a lot of faults. My mom was so devastated by her own bad childhood, that she really didn't know how to be a parent. My dad, who knew how to be a good parent, was often too busy having to take care of her after psychiatrists had her so drugged she often didn't get out of bed for days.
My mom is about to turn 65 and over the last 8 months or so, both my sister and I have gotten hate E-mail from her for no apparent reason other than she needs to pick a fight, so she starts pointing out our character defects. I originally refuted the points and it just escalated. I didn't even respond to her last hate E-mail. I'm wondering if something is going wrong with her brain (other than the mental illness she already has) from years of drinking or all of the prescription meds she's been hooked on (pain meds, amphetamines, sleeping pills, benzos.
Anyway, don't get me wrong, we did some crazy stuff when I was a kid. She even took my sister and me to a motel with a pool and we checked in overnight. I knew she didn't tell my dad where she was going and when she told us it was bedtime, I tried in vain to stay awake so she'd fall asleep and I could call my dad and let him know where we were. I was probably around 8 or 9 at the time. I felt guilt over that for years because I did fall asleep and never called him (and I wonder why I have insomnia now). He was crying when she brought us home late the next day.
Mom wasn't all bad times. When she was spiritually fit, we had a lot of fun. And I can recognize, as an adult, that she has a personality disorder and I just don't feed it. I love her and always will. I just have to hope I catch her on better days.
I guess what I'm saying is I hope that kid doesn't grow up with memories like mine. I hope the mother was just having a really bad day with a kid who had been acting up all day. And I hope she told him she was sorry and hugged him.
Anyway, I've come to realize that I never really had a good, consistent example of a parent. What kind of parent would I have made? My husband was gone a lot early on. He could be gone 6 months, come back for 10 days and then leave again for another 2 months. Many military wives have dealt with this and had children. Looking back (hindsight is always 20/20), I'm not sure I had what it took to be a good parent so it's best that I never did get pregnant. At least thinking about it that way helps take away some of the emptiness.
My faith is now in God, that He has some other purpose for me than being a parent to human children. I work with a pug rescue and maybe that's what I was meant to do. I believe He has not revealed his full purpose for me, but gives me a little more each time.
Anyway, sorry for rambling so much. If you've stuck with me this long, thanks. It's been a rough, emotional week. Hope yours is going better. :-)
((((((Hugs)))))) to everyone who needs one.
God bless.
Divorced Moms - How did you know it was time? (sm)
I am in an unhappy marriage, but I am scared to leave. I have insurance through my husband because I am an IC and I have all these fears - what if my job phases out? what if I injure my hands, what if I get sick, how will I take care of my kids. How did you know it was time?? Is it better now>
any cheerleader moms out there? i need some suggestions. sm
i have a varsity cheerleader. her turn is coming up to make the candy bag thingies, but she wants to do something different. she wanted to use paper towel rolls cut in half (they aren't allowed to use toilet paper rolls due to sanitary reasons), stuffed with candy and rolled up. however, i have not been able to collect 150 paper towel rolls or 75 even for that matter to cut in half. she has two weeks to get 150 candy bags ready. any suggestions on something different to use for candy bags rather than the standard norm of goodie bags?
Single moms - is it better to rent or buy? sm
I am separating, about to become a single mother of two children. I am wondering if I should buy a home or rent one. While buying seems like a good idea, I would also be giving a chunk of money for a down payment (which if I rented I could keep as emergency savings) plus I would be responsible to repair anything that might break. I would appreciate any advice on this.
thanks :-)
Thank you. Single moms on welfare are not all bad ones.
Women on here who say they have SOOOOO much saved for retirement and then talk about drawing social security burn my behind. It wasn't intended for the well-off to draw in the first place and probably will be gone by the time most of us get old enough to draw it.
This person is obviously overwhelmed with greed, wouldn't you say? In this day and age, with the greedy falling left and right, this one apparently doesn't understand that greedy behavior is no longer PC.
Boys wrap their moms around their fingers too
Apparently you, for example......I know moms of boys and sometimes I think some of them are delusional about their *boys/men*.....I don't know - I surely just don't get it.....as much as I try to get it.....
Questions for moms with daughters in puberty.. sm
My daughter will be 13 in December. Back in early August she had what I thought was the starting of her menses. She had some blood for about one week and then done. She has not had anything for the month of September. Is this normal? When I started I never remember stopping after the first one. She does play a lot of soccer and takes dance, so that might be part of it to. Any other mom's experiencing this?? She knows all about sex and pregnancy, so I know that is not an issue, especially since she goes nowhere without me or her dad. Thanks for any input.
I totally agree...no one can understand this job but us MT Moms...
no breaks from anything...but I love working at home and wouldn't change it for the world...even if my kids do drive me crazy on a daily basis---LOL...part of the job...
Moms - how long did you wait to tell people you were pregnant?
Right away or waited a while?
You're just a Scrooge, that's all. Read Jewish Moms post above.
g
Buy a home of my own - not a palace, but more of a smallish home on a large piece of land. (nm)
.
I married the same man 3 times and still married to him.
Together for almost 29 years now. 
Anyone move from a single family home to mobile home? sm
I own and live in a house in a midwest city in a bad neighborhood (wasn't that bad 11 years ago). I spent the day waiting for the plumber to come and jackhammer the foundation (slab house, no basement) to find a leaky pipe that is flooding my DD's bedroom. Last week, it was the electrician with quotes for costly repairs.
In the meantime, I've really been thinking about selling out and moving into a mobile home. Has anyone done this before? Is a mobile home in a decent park less of a hassle than a regular house? I'm so tired of cutting the grass and spending $$ to fix things and tired of old flooring and cabinets, etc., that are just too costly to replace. I'm single with no man to do these things for me and I can't afford a mortgage on a newer house in a good neighborhood. Some of the pictures I've seen of the mobile homes look really nice and modern on the inside.
Any advice and comments appreciated. Thanks!
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