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People who use the Bible as a weapon or excuse to control

Posted By: um, no way. on 2007-12-12
In Reply to: When my ex and I were together...sm - PammyB

others are NOT Christian. My God isn't a misogynistic control freak, so bye-bye. I like your aunt's saying. I'm going to have to remember that one.


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Just tired of people having every excuse why nothing is their
asdf
Yeah, but I don't think "the rod" has to be an actual weapon (sm)
I think it means to teach your kids the right way to behave - you are the parent, you be the boss, the teacher, the leader.
Make sure whatever you use for skewers aren't considered a weapon by the school. sm
Some schools are absolutely militant about anything that even looks like something that might be used as a weapon, no matter the reason or who has it.
he is feeling out of control and he wants control
and from what you wrote, you aren't giving him opportunities to have some control.

My 4 yo has had this type of behavior since the age of 2-1/2, but I've figured out how to deal with it. First of all, he wants your attention, good, bad, indifferent and wants some say so in what happens to him.

I've done several things. With the screaming, I totally ignore her. I tell her my ears are closed and I can't hear her, but if she wants to cry/scream, she can't do it in MY living room (bedroom, whatever), only in HER bedroom. If she refuses to stay in her room, I take away her favorite snuggly and put it on the top of something, out of reach but visible. She can have it back when she stays in her room and stops being loud. If she keeps coming out, I put another coveted stuff up out of reach, over and over until she realizes I mean she has to stay in her room. I don't tell her she has to stop her fit or crying...she just can't do it in MY space. She can come back to where I am if she is quiet.

I make sure she knows I am in control, but we negotiate almost everything. If I want her to drink milk for breakfast and she wants juice, I tell her okay but she has to drink the milk at lunch. That gives her a sense of control and having a say in what is happening to her.

I have also had to sit on her bed for HOURS, holding her by wrapping my arms around her while she screams and kicks and bites until she begs to be let go. I won't let go until the out of control stuff stops. I don't talk except to say "I'll let you go when you are quiet." It is exhausting, but it only took a few times for her to understand I would invest the time and she hated being held like that for so long.

When I work at home, I make sure I take a break about every 90 mins and spend about 30 mins with her. It takes me all day to get my work done, but it makes all the difference in the world.

If she won't pick up something (say, blocks) after being asked upteen times, I tell her I will give them away to a child who wants to take care of them. It only took losing one set of blocks for her to get the idea she HAS to clean up her messes.

Finally, after being potty trained for at least a month and then rebelling and making messes in her pants for a week in a row (this happened 3 times), I finally told her in a very loud voice that _I_ had control over whether or not she went trick or treating and whether or not Santa comes to our house. If she wanted to have those things, she better use the potty and no more messes. She has been dry since the beginning of October and I give her a treat every day she stays dry.

One day a couple of weeks ago, she wanted to go to Mickie Dee's, but as we drove up she started shouting about wanting to go inside. I wanted to drive through. We were in the drive through line and I calmly told her sometimes people get mad and yell at someone else, but maybe it was an accident...I asked if she wanted to tell me sorry for yelling at me or did she want to go home. She shook her head "no" to apologizing. I repeated my offer and again got "no." I drove off towards home which immediately threw her into tears and whining, but now she doesn't yell at me anymore if she wants something.

Since October we have far fewer melt downs and I have realized she actually shows me her triggers...If she is angry and grumpy on the way home from somewhere, I hand her an energy bar to munch and suddenly I have a sunshine child again. If she gets grumpy in the middle of the day and refuses to take a nap, I tell her we will lie down on my bed. We start out talking and before too long, I tell her I am tired and want to close my eyes, but not go to sleep. Pretty soon, she will close her eyes and fall asleep. I can then get back up and go about my business.

Before somebody starts bashing me, I have a close friend who is a child psychologist and she helped me with all these suggestions. It takes a lot of work to maintain the appearance of control while giving the child the opportunity of having some say so in his/her life.
Did you know that the Bible says

to go to someone who has something against you and make it right?  It doesn't just say that if  YOU did something wrong, make it right but that if there is something you can do, you should do it.  I bring this up because you thank the Lord for your many blessings, and he is the one who wrote that book called the Bible, so that is His opinion on your situation, in case you are wondering. 


I am shocked that, concerning your son dying, you turned the statement around and said what if something happened to you?  You are missing every point anyone tries to make.  That must because you know you are right.  Well, people who are convinced they are right, sometimes find out later that they were not.  But then it is often too late.  It will be interesting to see your response.  I'm sure it will again state how wonderful your life is and how you have done nothing wrong. 


Here's what the Bible says about sin ..
We are all born in iniquity.

Gluttony is a sin. Those who have a propensity toward gluttony (i.e., obesity) must strive against it, bringing the physical man under subjection to the spiritual man.

Sexual immorality is a sin, involving illicit relationships outside of marriage, beastiality, homosexuality, incest. Those with a propensity toward this sin must strive against it to bring the physical man under subjection to the spiritual man.

Just because people are born into sin does not mean we are licensed to continue living in it.


The Bible
Yes, the Bible was written by men, men who were INSPIRED by God. It is the infallible Word of God.

If you want good evidence for this, I suggest you check out "The Evidence That Demands a Verdict" by Josh Mcdowell. It is not a light read, but it is amazing. This man started out as an atheist who set out to prove there was no God and instead became a Christian.

Jesus is the same as He was then, now, and will be. So is His Word.
Maybe you should read more than just the bible...
Some interesting info can be found about this subject. Here is some: Everyone, religious or not, believing in God or not, transitions to the spirit world as part of the natural process of life. Just as one does not need to be religious to live in the physical world, one does not need to profess a particular faith to live in the spirit world. Thus while one does not have to be religious to dwell in the spirit world, one inevitably will benefit from a thorough understanding and practice of a particular tradition. This said, however, it needs to be recognized that not all teachings described as religious are beneficial. Religion which is judgmental, prejudicial, critical, and narrow may impede the spirit's natural growth.
Where in the Bible does it say what stores--sm
can and cannot sell?? Point out that *scripture* to me..please! The Bible also says *love one another as you love yourself*.
And I'm against the bible-thumpers!
.
No - no place for a bible
I know this is going to infuriate a lot of people, but in my opinion the bible does not belong in the classroom. If someone brings one in but keeps it their desk drawer or backpack to read on their own time that is one thing, but to keep it out in plain site? There is a place for that - it is called church. In this day and age there is such a multitude of people of different religions. How would anyone like it if I was an instructor of your child and I kept the Satanic bible or books of other religion out in plain site - don't think you would like it.
The Bible and its interpretations
There are multiple versions of the Bible, and many with different interpretations. How do YOU know which is the "correct" interpretation? Even the experts and historians have given the Bible different interpretations. Unless you are Christ himself I guess you can't possibly know. And I am a Christian. I have faith in God and I know Jesus died for me so don't jump all over me for accepting the reality of different interpretations of the Bible.
Bible believers
Where are all of you who take the bible literally? It does speak of people being possessed.

I don't think that what was happening, but people didn't know what various issues were (seizures, mental illness, etc.), so they came up with an explanation that made sense to them at the time.

But I am wondering why those of you who take the Bible literally don't seem to think this woman could be speaking the truth (or are you just not commenting)?

I'm sorry to the poster for your mom, you, and your child. There is mental illness in my family, and I remember seeng/hearing my aunt saying she had demons in her eyes (when I was quite young). She was so mentally ill, she really looked like she did have them!! It freaked me out.
To me this post is not really just about the Bible sm
but opinions/beliefs. Your mother had no need to talk about those things - just as you probably would not have wanted her to make a racist comment or an inappropriate sexual remark. She was out of line and if she cannot respect your house rules - then she needs to stay away. We all have opinions - we need to know when they should be shared.
I never once mentioned the Bible and have...
read the OP's post. I also addressed that she says the children are not fond of their father, but have also heard my own mother say that about me--UNTRUE. Personally, I think life is too short to put your needs ahead of your children's. If you do not agree with me, that's fine, too, but I stand behind what I said.
Just like the bible, they contradict themselves....all the time ;)
x
But this is definitely not Bible prophecy being fulfilled
The Bible clearly states it will be a mark (computer chip?) in the hand or forehead, not a card in our wallet. The day I am told I am required to have something implanted or tattooed or whatever on my body is the day I move up into the mountains, learn how to hunt and fish, build a cabin out of logs and weave my own cloth.
Interesting. I have always sad that sadly it is the bible itself
that prompts some people to become atheists because some of it is downright scary.

It has often been said that when it comes to the Bible most devout Christians boldly declare their belief in the "infallible word of God", demanding that every single word be taken literally, without exception.

But when it comes to the awkward verses including the cruel and unusual punishment ordered by God and Jesus, slaying of innocent animals and children, etc., the extreme testing of one's faith, clearly they tend to ignore them or interpret them VERY differently.

Funny, isn't it?
Is this only Bible study or does it involve anything else? nm
s
We have Bible study but we also have a lot of get-togethers. It is a very sm
"light" class. A lot of fun. Great relationships between the couples. To me, it's just great therapy.
Well, yes only Christians because you have to swear on the Bible. How can you sm
swear on something that you don't even believe in?

Besides, the latest polls show that 80+% of Americans believe that they are Christians. That's a huge majority.

Also, if they were not Christians and were running, I would certainly like to know their personal values and what their value system is based on if it isn't the Bible. Again, they swear in on the Bible, that's not just opinion.
Should he be allowed to keep the Bible on his desk?
Apparently, it's just sitting there. He's not teaching from it.

A Mount Vernon science teacher said yesterday that he will refuse to remove a Bible from his classroom desk, despite his school district's order.

"Thousands of citizens in this community have built their lives on deeply held religious convictions, and it is for them that I stand today," John Freshwater, 51, who teaches at Mount Vernon Middle School, said in a news release.

The religious activist Dave Daubenmire, Freshwater's friend, acted as his spokesman yesterday. "This is not a religion issue; this is a free-speech issue," Daubenmire said. "He didn't take the Bible to read to anybody."

Mount Vernon Superintendent Steve Short said Freshwater's characterization of the events leading to the district order that he remove religious items from his classroom was "not entirely accurate," but Short wouldn't elaborate.

The district later released a one-paragraph statement saying that district officials don't oppose religion but are required "under the First Amendment of the United States Constitution to protect against the establishment of religion in the schools. As a public school system the district cannot teach, promote or favor any religion or religious beliefs."

Freshwater and Daubenmire believe that separation of church and state "is a fraud" and that the framers of the Constitution never intended it to be practiced the way it is today, Daubenmire said.

The district asked Freshwater last week to remove the Ten Commandments from the door to his classroom and remove the Bible from the view of students. About 3,900 students attend Mount Vernon schools. Mount Vernon is about 52 miles northeast of Columbus.

Freshwater took down the Ten Commandments but decided that being prevented from taking a Bible into the classroom was going too far.

In the past, Freshwater has taught his students about the "holes in evolution" and intelligent design, the theory that a supernatural power created complex forms of life, Daubenmire said.

"Would our government ask a follower of Islam to remove her burqa in order to teach school?" Freshwater said in his written statement. "Would we ask a science teacher to remove The Origin of Species from his desk merely because the origin of man has never been proven?

"I cannot with a clear conscience follow a directive that makes religion and the religious viewpoint any less credible by those who deem themselves more enlightened."

Freshwater wouldn't answer questions directly because of the likelihood he will file a lawsuit charging "viewpoint discrimination," Daubenmire said.

Daubenmire is the former London High School football coach whose district was sued in 1999 by the American Civil Liberties Union because he led his players in prayer at games, practices and meetings. The district settled out of court, and its insurance company paid the ACLU $18,000 for court costs.

You're very wrong. The Bible is very much up for

I had a baptist pastor tell me that I should not marry out of my race and that it's in the Bible...  So what do you say to that? 


Believe what you want and interpret it how you want, but then don't say that others are sinners when you are not GOD!


I do believe the Bible, I just don't want my mom scaring my kids (sm)
And she used "swearing on the Bible" as a way to further convince the children that she had seen demons and ghosts, as if they weren't scared enough. That was the kicker...that really scared them even more.
Are you rejecting religion and the Bible or God?

I have problems myself with organized religion; however, I have personal proof of life after death, which leads me to believe in a Creator.  Just curious about where you're coming from.


There may be one judge, but the Bible is quite clear that any person
who denounces God will not go to Heaven.  I am very comfortable in the fact that I have salvation.
No thanks, the Holy Bible is THE written authority to me!
j
take your bible thumping to the religion board.
Another good example of a CARNAL "Christian" calling people pathetic and nauseating, a fine example of "love thy neighbor as thyself." LOL
great post ks and who invented the Bible?

My opinion is that men interpreted the bible(s) of the world....women had little say, and GOD HAD NO stuff to write with.......men certainly did succeed and put their *slant* on things to control.....yeah, to control........is my belief and my opinion and I'm sure at least dozens others here too...and even more in the grander scale of things, not just those on online bulletin/message boards.



Again, I follow what the Bible says, that homosexuality is sinful &
support homosexuality by selling items of that nature is not where I will be shopping.  You can try to twist this around every way possible, but I am not judging anyone. God will do that.  No, I do not associate with gay people, but that does not mean that I would not be pleasant to someone who is.  I don't agree with the gay lifestyle, I don't shop at stores that sell homosexual items, and you can make me out to be the bad guy all you want.  I believe in what I believe.
I'm not a Bible scholar, but I can try to explain what Matthew was saying...
He wasn't saying that everyone who goes to synagogues are hypocrites. In his time, he was saying that there are some people who went to synagogues who were hypocrites.
Matthew's Gospel is written for a Jewish audience, or maybe I should say, from the perspective of a Jew speaking to other Jews. He is describing a situation that we still see today, people who proclaim themselves religious and call attention to themselves, but don't really live faith. In this particular verse, he describes something that his audience would be familiar with. They were Jews and they went to synagogues. They most certainly would have known people who called attention to themselves and proclaimed that they were righteous. Meanwhile, they really didn't live righteous lives.
Today we know that scenario can refer just as easily to someone who sits in the front pew at a church on Sunday, but then spends the rest of the week being evil to his fellow human beings. We also know of people who proclaim Islam, but carry out terrorist acts.
The Bible was written thousands of years ago, of course. So we have to try to think of it from that perspective, and then carry the lessons forward into the present time.
Does that make it as clear as mud? :) Like I said, I'm not a Bible scholar, but I did want to try to explain it so that you wouldn't think there was a hateful agenda hidden in the verse.
Great news! Thanks! Definitely the bible of anyone doing surgery. :) nm
s
Even biblical scholars do not believe the Bible is the word of God (sm)
They recognize the Bible as written by humans. I just finished a very insightful course at my local university with an extraordinary instructor who is a minister and very learned scholar of the Bible. It opened my eyes and reaffirmed my beliefs (or lack thereof).
It is the Holy Bible which includes both new and old Testaments. nm
..
The Bible is also pretty clear when it says judge not lest ye be judged.
nm
i find the science in the Bible pretty tangible,
ie, that this world is a sphere, suspended in heaven (vs. flat), about the paths/currents under the sea, and more -- these were written WAYYYYYY before 'man' discovered same. Those are tangible facts or science. However, science nowadays isn't necessarily fact -- too much theory purported as science...
Yes, but keep in mind ks that Christian's follow EVERY word of the Holy Bible
g
No excuse
It is completely rude, but there isn't much else you can do.  You can, however, choose a consistant pickup time yourself and let her know what that is.  I have done that which creates a big inconvenience to them instead of you. :)
Excuse me?
I have a teenage daughter and I resent the implication that they are all sex-crazed nymphos.  At least, that's the way I took your post.  Generalizations like the one you just made are offensive.
ExCUSE me?????? sm
Would this be a little sexual harrassment? How terrible for your daughter!! You don't have a choice, you HAVE TO DO SOMETHING. Poor girl, she's so sensitive anyway!!!!! No you are NOT overeacting. Go STRAIGHT TO THE SCHOOL WITH THIS ONE . . .
No excuse for this
The only human thing doesn't cut it. I have worked in hospitals for many years, observed nurses and MDs in action. When administering drugs, there is no excuse for massively overdosing newborns with Heparin. The nurse was probably talking her head off to somebody, had her mind on 10 different things instead of what she should have been doing - passing meds.

If she was tired, then she should not have passed meds or should have had somebody help her to doublecheck herself.

I hope they sue the pants off that nurse and the hospital, too.
EXCUSE ME???
I was correcting MY error...you need to calm down, sister...I would never, ever correct anyone else's mistake, only my own.  I made a mistake, I CORRECTED MY MISTAKE.  can't you read??????? So freakin' rude, grow up will ya!
Excuse me! sm

Lining my pockets?  Are you serious?  This is for my daughter, not me.  I have plenty of money and don't need their money.  We make over $100,000 a year.  My daughter is the one who suffered and is continuing to suffer.  What would you do if your daughter was traumatized like this? 


I think you have a lot of nerve!!!


excuse
all my typo.  It has already been a long day.  That is why I am on the forum.  I needed a break.
Excuse me, but....(sm)
...we certainly do hear of women who are cruel to animals. Just Google "woman charged with cruelty to animals" and you'll get plenty of hits.

I wonder, as a man, if I could get away with posting a sexist slur like yours about women? I doubt it!
Should have been benefit...excuse me (nm)
x
Yes, but their rudeness does not excuse your own
You should always respond to an invitation, even if no RVSP, but most definitely if there is one.
Excuse, did not speak about yours
you must have been trying to read between the lines and never said anything about your dear one. You imaged.
Please excuse my ignorance sm
but do any of these have natural herbs that could counter-act birth control pills? I know that St. John's Wart can counter-affect BCP. I have a terrible problem with insomnia, seemingly inhierted from both parents, but they didn't have it until early 40s. I am 39 and have had problems for well over 10 years. Thanks!
Excuse the typos-been
a long day of typing!
Excuse, then, thought just yours but
i would have told her in that situation you thought just you and the combined kids, husband not going and you want to wait until it would be just you 2 adults so you could catch up on some girl talk- actually if me I would not even put in the girl talk but I know some people not out there like me. I would just tell her sorry, want to go when we girls can spend some time together. If invited somewhere, anyone knows you just don’t make arrangements for a third party to come along- unless you ask first if ok.