Thank you...can I ask you (sm)

Posted By: OP on 2007-12-31
In Reply to: you do the leaving - mimiskids

Was it an alcohol issue or was it his personality? Do you consider the incident I told about in my original post to be abuse? Did he always try to make you feel like it was your fault? How old were your children when you finally left? Sorry for all the questions...thanks again

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I'm sick & husband is being mean...just so tired of it - sm - crying all morning, just venting
- I HAVE A BRAINSTORM - nana
  - That was funny - thanks! LOL - he's nicer today (of course) sm - OP
    - Be careful of the cycle. He is in the gift mode. - HolidayMT
  - Don't you get drunk quicker while in the air? - HolidayMT
- Been there - heck, there now!... - The Other Sunshine
  - One tiime, say yes and go. See how he reacts to - that. nm
- been there done that - ginny
  - It is as if some men get angry if their wives are sick or hurt (sm) - OP
- Thanks everyone for your comments (sm) - OP
  - Calling AA will do you no good. You need to call Al-Anon. - latecomer to thread
  - GOOD FOR YOU! But, think of yourself first. call the domestic violence hotline FIRST. - Holiday MT
  - Maybe he was freaking out about germs - during today's incident
    - That one is highly unlikely! LOL! He doesn't believe in germs! LOL! - nm OP
- your hubby - spring
- So he's out drunk and with a gun. S/l a recipe for - huh
- Why don't you appreciate the fact that he cooks??? - Mt
  - Uh, what? Cooking makes up for meanness? - tnmt
  - He messed up the pan on purpose...to be mean n/m - OP
- I just wanted to say I feel bad for you. - sm
- I am so very sorry, my heart is with you. - HolidayMT
  - Thank you...do you really think they will listen to me (sm) - OP
    - Of course they will listen. Mental abuse is extremely prevalent - HolidayMT
      - wow - mimiskids
- Well, he sounds like a control - Me
- I'd kick him out. I would not enable him to keep doing what he is doing - pc
  - How can I kick him out? I have told him to leave many times (sm) - seriously - OP
    - you do the leaving - mimiskids
      - Thank you...can I ask you (sm) - OP
        personality/alcohol - mimiskids
    - If you are serious about leaving, you need a plan. SM - bunny buncher
      - Do NOT stay just because of the age of your kids. - MslaMT
        You may want to shoot me, but SM - bunny buncher
    - Order of protection, change locks and be prepared - to call police. nm
    - Call womans shelter/police and ask them where to - start. nm
- bull, he was not too drunk he has a girlfriend. See the writing on the wall. nm - Minding your Business
  - Honestly I think I am dealing with both issues with him (sm) - OP
    - Sorry to hear all this; here's my advice - sm
      - This is basically what I have been doing the last few years (sm) - OP
  - you don't know that for sure. He says he thinks he's an alcohol. - she needs to start there. n/m
- You choose to stay in this situation. Until you make - decision to change this, it will continue, no surp
  - do you know how alcoholism works? - n/m
    - I know if SHE doesnt get proactive and take charge - her and children's situation, nothing will chan
- if he states he thinks he may be an alcoholic, he is asking for help - there is help out there; utilize it.
  - Would he still act like this even when sober? (sm) - OP
    - alcoholics have personality changes; talk to AA group - get info on it. n/m
      - Or could he be using alcohol as excuse without - really being alcoholic? nm
        if he quits drinking and changes for the better, you have your answer - n/m
        This may sound crazy sm - Seasoned Survivor
        Thanks...and I drink almost never...I occasionally buy (sm) - OP
        Let us know sm - Seasoned Survivor

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