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When my now 20 yo DD told me about her drugs and alcohol sm

Posted By: I freaked a bit on 2008-06-30
In Reply to: Scary isn't it? - sm

I asked that she wait until she was out of high school to have sex, because it carries big consequences and she needed to be ready for that. For that she waited for that, but tried marijuana twice and got drunk a couple of times too. I was shocked by my "good girl."


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or drugs combined w/alcohol
/
OMG!!! Does he supply them with drugs and alcohol
so they will be doing that in the safety of their home as well?

I am floored by that reasoning. Its as if there is no hope of teaching a child to make smart choices so might as well have them do it in front of you. What on earth is that teaching them?? I'm sorry but you do not need to be a parent to see how completely asinine that is.

By the way, you should ask him if his home is "safe" enough to preclude AIDS and other STDs, pregnancy, etc. Maybe he thinks there is some soft of "force field" protecting her there. Egads.
Use of illegal drugs, alcohol consumption, and cigarette
smoking are just as prevalent today as they were 20+ years ago.  Perfect example:  Look at the DARE program, that was introducted in grade school amost 20 years ago.  There are no hard statistical facts that there are less drug abusers today than there were 20 years ago, so that 'program' was a complete failure and a waste of tons of money.  These types of behaviors will go on until the end of time.  No amount of education or imprisonment is every going to stop people from engaging in these types of behaviors.
Prostitution, alcohol, pot, recreational drugs, cigarettes...sm...
ALL should be illegal.

Some are not out of 'tax reasons'.

How come that people can only relax when they are under the influence of whatever?????


I was told by a child I was doing drugs --
because that is what they were teaching in elementary school.
100% against. Against alcohol, anyway. lol
nm
alcohol

Alcohol......
I personally don't drink with every meal but I do have wine now and then. A girlfriend of mine and her husband have a glass or two of wine just about every night with dinner and have for years, but I wouldn't say they have a problem.

I suppose you need to ask yourself if you didn't have it, would it stay on your mind until you had it.??
alcohol
I think 1-2 drinks a day is absolutely fine. It is relaxing, and I usually do the same. My mom has done it for years, has a glass of wine at lunch and 1 or 2 in the evening and she is well into her 80s and in perfect health! Enjoy yourself and ignore your roommate.
For those who suggested alcohol..sm
alcohol is a stimulant and will have just the opposite effect. Melatonin helps, but I don't like its after effects, and it does have some. I recently came across a native american remedy called Cloud Walking Tea. It is a tea and it works. I sleep peacefully with no after effects.
Alcohol is NOT a stimulant, but
it is very short-acting for people with a normal liver, so it helps many people fall asleep, but then they wake up again after a few hours.

I said that about the liver because I have read there are some people whose livers don't work right and really can't handle any alcohol. That's kind of scary because people don't find out until their liver is destroyed, apparently.
*Alcohol* is the key word here - sm
and reeking of it is definitely a red flag. How would they get to the lake? By car? Alcohol and cars = trouble. Also, alcohol and water are a bad combination as well. If you're still on the fence about it, you could call the friend's mother and ask if the father is going or not. Chances are she's heard this question before..........
No, I mean no alcohol period. nm

Against lowering and against alcohol
I have a BIL who is an alcoholic. I have seen first hand what it can do to kids and the family as a whole, hate the stuff!!!!!!!!
you don't know that for sure. He says he thinks he's an alcohol.
nm
Or could he be using alcohol as excuse without
x
personality/alcohol
Both, I think. Alcohol makes personality traits creep out from under the woodwork. Surly, sarcastic, belittling, called me four letter words in front of the kids. Yes, I consider the way he talks to you to be abuse, especially if this is how he talks to you most of the time. Of course, everything was my fault. An alcoholic does no wrong. It is never their fault, even when they are down to their last dime with no family left. My children were 14 and 16. However, they did not go with me. He had brainwashed them into thinking that he was the only one who could provide for them, that I could only work for minimus wage and that they would have nothing without him. I stayed in the same town, we had joint custody, he had residential. He has since died and my kids and I are fine.
what about alcohol? that's legal
x
oh yeah, that too...alcohol....*lol*. forgot...sm

And I usually NEVER have air in my brain *ROFL*....thanks for the laugh!! 


Or you can drink alcohol at home : )
x
Abstinence of ALL alcohol is the trick !!!
This method will allow you to know what you are doing at ALL times and prevent taking the life of another individual.  Easy on your organs, too.  Good example for your children . . . and on and on and on
former teenage alcohol user

I don't know if this is too "harsh" for your daughter, but have you thought about showing her the results of drinking and/or driving?  I drank A LOT in high school, starting around 15 when my mom got sick and continued daily drinking through graduation and then some.  Did my fair share of drinking and driving or riding in cars with drivers who drank, thinking that nothing would ever happen.  My sister who was 5 years older than me died from drinking and driving when I was 18, and to "show" me and my teenage cousins the consequences, we went with my uncle to see her car that had not been cleaned after the wreck (nasty, and I still see it to this day which is about 18 years later)...she was in a little 4-door car and fell asleep and drove underneath an 18-wheeler.  That sight was burned into my brain and I never forgot what drinking and driving could do, that we weren't invincible. 


I did hear of a school that was doing "shock presentations" to students, arranging to have 10 or so students missing from classes for the day, then the other students were told that they were killed in accidents from drinking.  While that is a bit extreme, I really think that shock works best on teenagers as I always thought I knew best and that nothing would ever happen. 


Tobacco and alcohol should be illegal.
who make poor decisions.

The 2 drugs that cause more death and damage are legal but shouldn't be.

I have a right NOT to pay for others' poor decision-making and to not worry about the impact hurled onto society from their actions.


rubbing alcohol for all things
I would not call the school. Let the alcohol soak for awhile and then pick it off. I say amen for art teachers, but just in case, The Children's Place is having a $5.00 t-shirt sale.
drugs
Yeah - drugs certainly change people. . it is such a problem in the rural area I live in - I guess it is everywhere. . . I'm not sure why people are buried after cremation - but I do think the cremation process is cheaper because you don't have to buy a casket, so that may be one reason people opt for cremation.
drugs
Have you ever suspected drug use?
So sad - drugs are
one of the devil's favorite tools for destruction.
I definitely think she did it and I think she is on drugs. sm
Drugs will make you do crazy things. I have no doubt she did it. Too much evidence and lies stacked against her. I think she may have been upset or trying to get ravinge on her mom or something with them having a fight.
I think she's on drugs.
I can hardly stand to hear her talk on AI. She just rambles on and on. Slurred speech, loopy, eyes half closed. Classic. Hasn't she said in the past that she has chronic back pain?
drugs
I am no expert, but I do have a lot of experience with this topic, so I will cut through the bumper stickers and the pep talk.

If you want to know if he is going to be okay or not, all you really have to do is figure out if he ever took care of anyone besides himself. If he EVER, from the time he was a little boy, set what he wanted aside, made a sacrifice for someone else. If he did, then probably somewhere down the line things will turn around. If he never has, ever, not been selfish, then don't get your hopes up.

If I was in your shoes, I would call his ex-wife and find out.
went to dinner, drank alcohol, went home...

took a Vicodin for pain, fell asleep, got up, stumbled, fell down, unconscious and friend tried administering CPR....to no avail while rescue was on their way


as it turned out, he had stopped taking his BP medications the 2 weeks prior, so that's the reason he died....we do believe......... but the combination of vicodin and drink contributed we also believe....


:(


I should clarify - that would be rubbing alcohol, not liquor! nm
x
it was allowed because its passive (unlike alcohol) and
nm
So then why take any drugs at all? Or why not let's just decide which
x
Then they need to pay for their own children, drugs,
alchol, whatever they want to do. Pay your own way, I have no problem with that.
Oh my! What kind of *drugs*?
Interesting story.
Considering 2 of the top 10 drugs prescribed in the USA:
$31 Billion Spent On Top 10 Prescribed Drugs, USA
Total Expenditure: $2.2 billion
Number of persons: 4.5 million
Zoloft
Total Expenditure: $2.1 billion
Number of persons: 4.7 million

Paxil
Total Expenditure: $2.2 billion
Number of persons: 4.5 million


It's quite a different world than previous. I think everyone has one or thing or another/S to be anxious about.
It's out of control, if you ask me. The world, that is.


Drugs v. Friends.
It is hard to say how long it lasted. I would think that this was "the year" & then have another period. Probably 3 yrs. During which I was an angry, emotional wreck but was so "inside" of the experience I couldn't really see what was happening. I lost a lot of friends. Effexor helped me a lot, but didn't start until late in the game. Wish I'd tried it sooner. Had talked to one doc about BCPs, but as my symptoms were more emotional than physical, did not seem this would be likely to help.




OMG! I just learned my son was on drugs

What do I do? He's going to be 40 this year. I had heard years ago that he started on majjuania when he was over in Japan in the service, but didn't believe it. He and his wife broke up (supposedly) over her use of of meth and cocaine, but I didn't believe that either. Lately, he 's been bringing some "not so nice looking"  friends around here for approval and not recieiving that, so I have not seen him since Christmas Eve. Tonight, I heard he is on heroin. This is absolutely the straw that broke the camel's back. He always denied he was on meth or cocaine, but tonight's "revealation" is absolutely too much if it's true.


I'm broken-hearted and devastated over this latest "rumor/truth" (from more than 1 person) and don't really know how to bring the subject up and/or confront him with this. I'm so disappointed [in my son] and thought he was smarter than this. Now I understand why he is not actively trying to find work (unemployed since May last year).


Any suggestions? Forget rehab unless it's free. We can't afford it.He's my only son and he had a very tough life trying to live up to my husband's idea of a (step)son, but he really looks up to him now. We have another son (my stepson) who never got into drugs, why my son? Could his life been so bad?


I love my son but am thoroughly upset with this latest revelation. I just don't know what to do, and would like to stand behind him, but if drugs are his first love, I'm afraid I can't do that. I'm not really a confrontal person and don't want to lsoe my son, but if he gets caught, I'm afraid I won't/can't bail him out of jail.


Your thoughts?


Can't say too much as daughter who had always been so much against drugs
told me not long ago that she now smokes pot. She is 37 and leading her own life but she was 1 who was so against and then? She and her brother both booze it up more than I think they should but then again, both grown so??
How is he affording to buy these drugs?
He hasn't worked since May? Maybe he is also selling drugs to afford his habit. If he is living with you, I would get him out ASAP!
alcohol makes her nuts, along with millions of other people.
nm
Definitely stress. Cops said once that Xmas eve with alcohol & money
s
Yes, but approximately 26 drugs were recalled in

I have no doubt that some drugs are worthwhile

but don't you ever type a list of meds a mile long and wonder how the poor patient (especially someone elderly) is still standing upright?  Sometimes that makes me absolutely crazy.  I think there is absolute validity in natural cures and I think the medical community or government or whomever is too quick to push yet another drug - or in this case, a vaccine - on the population without knowing exactly what the side effects will be.


I strained my lower back 3 weeks ago.  My mother immediately assumed I was going to need surgery, friends insisted I needed drugs.  I went to my chirpractor.  It took several visits, but I am now pain free.  Totally, 100% natural.  (I didn't add this to start another whole debate, but just to make my point that there are alternatives.)


Have a great day!! 


Figure it has to be drugs of some sort.....
o
Drugs can affect people in different
and unexpected ways. I'm very sorry you and your son are going through this.

I had a very weird reaction to Topamax.

I hope the MD can help him. How scary.
Said the woman who did drugs and got where she is because of her father.... nm
x
No and things have gotten insane concerning drugs
nm
Maybe that is why she wanted to use fertility drugs...
to get her own show on TLC...heck, we all know how John and Kate plus 8 paid for that brand new spanking house in PA with tons of acres...not working on computers like they claim he does....
While I don't remember drugs ever being legal
I do know there was a time in this country where "recreational" drugs were legal. After all, that is where Coca Cola got it's name from (from the cocaine that use to be in it). From what I've read, seems to me there wasn't a problem with drugs in this country until it was made illegal ala prohibition. Now due to it being illegal, there is tons of money flowing in a lot of different directions as a result (the millions of jails that are being build to house all the recreational users, etc. plus the money that is made selling it, etc.). Heck, even though it's illegal, it's big business, so I can see everybody that's involved in it regardless of what side they are on fighting to keep it illegal.