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While I don't understand why you had no say in the matter, if he..

Posted By: M.A. on 2006-12-20
In Reply to: EX in-law problems - need advice

is going to continue staying with her, I would just not say anything, because if she is nasty she will end up taking it out on him. Any chance you could move to that particular school district so he could live with you again? Other than for your son being there, why did you HAVE to keep in touch with them? Good luck.


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I understand. No matter how bad things are, there sm
is thought they could get better. The love you once shared could be brought back and you wil live happily ever after.

See a marriage counselor. It may happen; it may not happen, but get some professional help.
It really does not matter what you believe...sm

As a Christian, I believe in the Bible being the word and truth of God... and there is a h*** (sorry to use this symbo, but I have been told when trying to post this that this is a "bad" word) just as there is a heaven....we all make a choice in our lives which place we will go to in the end.  People will always find an excuse not to go to Church...and that is what they are excuses.  As a Christian I am no less a person than anyone around me....people just try harder to see my sins to see me fall.  But being a Christian does not make my sins go away, I just have to repent and try not repeat them.  I am not perfect...there was only One who was!  There is always strife and discord in any Church...whether you choose to become part of it is just that...your choice.  And yes, Jesus stands for love and forgives, but he does not ask us to be tolerant of the world....love the sinner and hate the sin.  God is only tolerant to a point and then he will punish. 


For the record, I celebrate Halloween with my children....no horror or blood and guts.  We do the Trunk or Treat at our Church for the community and decorate our car in a bibilical theme.


No matter where you go..sm

there you are!  Sounds like you 2 lovebirds are gonna have a real blast.  Be safe out there.    Cat 


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ygs2xfjJG2M


 


 


he probably said to himself, "I am not going down no matter what". LOL
I am sure his adrenaline was pumping like crazy at that point. You could tell the entire team wanted that win so bad and they deserved it.
Different matter
I don't think it sounds like a matter of not forgiving him for something that happened 4 years ago.  It sounds more like you don't love him anymore.  If that's the case, then you deserve the chance to find happiness with someone else.  IMHO.  Good luck to you!
Why does it matter?
why does your sister care how much money she has? about the husband, Im a bit confused about that one... if they are married, isn't it both their money?

Anyways, I would take it up with my sis before ever saying anything to mom.
don't think that would matter with IVF - nm
xxx
I there is a will, it does NOT matter
WHO COMES FIRST!
Anybody who makes a will can DETERMINE WHO COMES FIRST and can cut out anybody he/he wants from the inheritance.

Ony if there is no will, the
state takes over as executor and distributes the assets according to WHO COMES FIRST.

And watch what you are saying and the TONE in which you are saying it, I am probably better informed than you are.
It does not matter which is what!
MY point is that the word

STUPIDER

exists!

Anon said there is NO word 'stupider'!

DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

A little 'slow?'


what does it matter
My mother is a sociopath, and that is the tip of the iceberg.

Sounds like you have had a very unhappy family life for a very long time.

What do you think is the matter
with these types of people? A brain issue, early trauma? It's hard to believe anyone would just WANT to be a pain in everyone's A$$!
No matter how responsible you are
and how much time you spend with them, you cannot be there 24-7 to supervise them. That is completely unrealistic. Can we take them to the doctor, to the store, to the kids' school? Come on now.

There is a responsible way to crate an animal. No matter how much you train them, my labs still would have eaten anything in site for a certain period of time. There is no way I would leave them unattended to run my errands and chance them getting into something that could harm them. Regardless of the material objects as you call them, they could get hurt.

Also, a child does need a crib and a playpen. To say that those are used so that you do not have to supervise your kids is ridiculous. Everyone has to go to the restroom at some point. Should we carry them everywhere or perhaps let them run around so they can get into something that would harm them until we finish our business? Wow....

I believe a pediatrician would even tell you that those are necessary in raising a healthy child, and I am not talking about someone who puts their kids in a playpen all day instead of spending time with them either.
But no matter where she lives, she is still
just not that pretty and I personally would not want to be her, no matter where she lives. I love my neighborhood and I don’t have man hands, huge teeth, watermelon head, toothpick body and no one has ever complained about my voice. I do not like her show at all.
As a matter of fact, he did.
Actually, a few years later he took the boys, then 8 and 14, because they needed the discipline of a dad. Bad mistake! He'd convinced me he had changed, but then went out to his play rehearsals and band practice every night, leaving the boys at home. I'd sue to get custody back, he'd shape up for awhile, I'd back off, and the cycle repeated until I ran out of money. The boys are grown now, doing basically okay. He's just pathetic now.
My daughter does matter

My 6-year-old values her "family."  She does not express her feelings much but I caught her in her room crying one night and she broke down and told me she does not want to lose her family.  Divorce is a very traumatic thing for a child of any age and her mental health is worth it to me.


Now, the decision here is if things are dysfunctional enough here to be hurting her worse than if I stayed.  This is what I need to figure out.


But the love of my child is worse sacrifying a part of me.  She is my world and her happiness means EVERYTHING.


Would it matter that she is almost 10 y/o and not in a daycare? sm
We were at soccer practice Monday night for her and last night for her sisters. Sisters are 12 and 6. they do not have them.
As a matter of fact -
I love making cinnamon-rasin bread with this same recipe. Also, it's great for homemade pizza and bread sticks - and a lot cheaper than sending out, though maybe a little more labor intensive! Worth it for the taste, though. I've also made fried dough on special occasions. Great minds DO think alike!
No matter his age, he is your child, right?
NM
matter of choices
It's not just about protecting our children from being taught something that is wrong, something that goes against our moral fiber, something that this great country was founded on, our belief in God.  It is also about standing up for our beliefs and not condoning something that is clearly sinful.  You may not believe there is a God yet.  That is your opinion.  What makes you think that you were right in letting your child watch anything she wanted?  So she turned out good.  So did my children and they were raised to believe in God and his son Jesus Christ.  The only difference is, when the time comes for Jesus to come back to this earth, your daughter will find that she has been cheated by being taught there is no God and perhaps will find herself in some serious trouble. 
No, as a matter of fact
I did not revel. I did not know what to think seeing here there saying that. Unfortunately, I don't live where she was speaking and the news channels did not show the whole speech, only parts of it. I do have to say that now she is putting it out there that her comment was aimed at "gangsta rappers." That can't be factual, or if it WAS, I sure did not see anybody remotely fitting that description in her audience. Why can't she just say, "Woops, I said it, but did not mean it and I'm sorry. That was inappropriate." Instead, she has all sorts of commenters out there blowing smoke trying to CYA for her, trying to twist it and put it into a context that casts her in a better light. Frankly, I am sick of her more than I can say. She should be thankful to live here in the US where she got into a great college when she had a very poor GPA, which would never have happened anywhere but here in the US.
as a matter of fact, it's not so dum...
See, the cats have it both ways. They are predator without truly being prey. Plus, their numbers are great enough that it's conceivable they could impact local populations. And honestly, domestic housecats are "exotic species" to the North American fauna, not a natural predator or part of the normal ecosystem at all. So, yeah, the guy has a point.

But then I'm biased, I admit, because I keep my own cats indoors and I'm aggravated no end with the neighbor cats who come and spray in my yard. :)
no matter what she does, she still appears
x
no, it is not all a matter of responsible
ownership. There have been very loving responsible owners themselves attacked by their own dogs. A popular dog breed can be overbred indiscriminately and ruined. Unfortuntately this breed is too unpredictable. I've always been around animals, large and small and have both now. I would never have a pit bull. I visit my friend less often now who now has one, and won't get out of the car if it is loose. Not to mention that these dogs don't just bite, which would be bad enough, they instinctively go for the kill. I haven't read the link you provided yet, but do NOT believe that breed-specific legislation is stupid. This particular bill may be over the top, but breed-specific laws are brought on by a need, and wouldn't get off the ground without plenty of facts on record to support it.
Would it matter if he was biologically yours? sm
All I am saying is that if he was biologically your son and was selling marijuana, would you be doing the same thing? I would hope so. I'm not bashing you as a stepmom. It is hard to read posts without seeing a person's facial expressions and tone of voice. The original post did not say anything about anyone selling pot or someone else making $60K+ per year, etc. All it said was that the stepchildren didn't give proper gifts and that gifts they were given were not appreciated while nothing negative was stated about the biological child.
His opinions should not matter to you really (sm)
Everyone has opinions - what do you care what his are? Move past it - you cannot change him or his opinions - don't let his words get to you - then he wins. Move on. And don't answer the phone anymore when he calls!
Why, no matter how carefully
I plan my list, do I always forget one very important item at the grocery store?
As a matter of fact
I will be spending Thanksgiving with my daughter (age 39) and some of her friends and we plan to break out the old Trivial Pursuit!  Can't wait - it sure beats watching sports on T.V.
You're going to die no matter what you do. sm
It's your quality of life that you fight for.
Nobody here is going to give you a reason to continue smoking.
What does your friend with the lung CA say about it?

what is the subject matter?
nm
It is a matter of the individual.
For you, this might work whereas for others, it might not. My husband and I shared equally in the housework and raising of our children. It is a very individual thing and as long as it is a choice and not because "that's the way it should be", then of course it will work. We are all very different.
It is none of his business or anyone elses for that matter. sm
I love Halloween. I love Christmas. Well, I don't really care what anyone else thinks. I decorate more for Christmas than I do for Halloween. There are people now that don't celebrate Christmas too. You know what I think.. to heck with them and ALL of THEIR beliefs. I am going to continue to do what makes me happy and what has been celebrated in my family for way more years than I want to admit. The world is changing. Whether we decide to go with it is OUR choice. If you have fun doing it, then don't worry about what anyone else thinks. It really is none of their business. For the first year in probably 18 years, I am dressing up with my children and I look forward to it (They asked me too). And even tho it is early, Happy Halloween!!
It doesn't matter what century
either. The fact is homosexuality is a sin and I will have no part of any business that supports it.
What happened to things that matter
Remember when everything was closed on Holidays and Sundays? Remember back when there was FAMILY time? It is a shame that you all are arguing about something like this. Everything just has to be So PC!! It has gotten out of control! No one can say anything! I usually do not read/enter into these conversations, but this one caught me attention. Things should go back to the way it was then. Maybe marriages will stay together, kids behave better, people will be happier at work and everyone will have a bit more respect for each otehr. RESPECT has gone completely out the window. This poor person just came on and stated an opinion and was quick to be jumped on! Who cares what religion she is. Who cares what religion you are. Your comments are ridiculous. She didn't offend me. It did not seem like she intended to offend anyone. The store should be closed! I am sure the owner will be home enjoying his family. GEEZ....lighten up and get off your perch.
No matter how annoying they are..be thankful you have one--sm
some of us do not and it is very difficult to provide for ourselves in this day and age. Think about it...truly...what would you do without them?
Well skipping meals no matter
what kind of condition you have is not good.  I have also heard that thyroid problem causes weight gain, but good food choices should still override this condition.  We all have vices, and we all can have excuses.  Just keep trying!
It shouldn't matter. Of all the couples I know currently, (sm)
only ONE is same-race. The rest are white/black, black/Pacific Islander, Asian/white, etc. And the only same-race couple I know is gay. So no, it shouldn't matter in the slightest.
As a matter of fact I did. I used to agree with you (sm)
but since doing my own research, I've come to the conclusion that it is a bunch of crap.
General legal matter
Definitely take pictures to use in your defense and when you remove those vines from your house, take pictures of the removal of paint too. Most state laws allow you to control whatever is growing over your house, fence and/or yard that results from a neighbor but if you trim their plants that are on your property and happen to kill the entire tree, plant or vine, your neighbor can make you replace them. It's a matter that has no winning situation because you have to live by these people. I say get a free estimate from a landscaper and get an estimate from a painter also, talk to someone in the legal system and see exactly what your options are, and move forward to bring this problem to an end. Once you find out what action you can take, if any, tell your neighbor what you are planning to do and if they do not take care of the problem, you will move forward as planned. No way would I let this go on without doing something about it. Good luck.
I doesn't matter if you like Ann Coulter or not. I am not even
very familiar with her, other than hearing her name. She has a good point. If the illegals couldn't get the jobs, they couldn't stay here. Prosecute the owners of companies who hire them. Put a few CEOs in prison, problem solved.
Sorry...this was in agreement to saying that they STINK, no matter
s
No! Not offended in the least and as a matter of fact, sm
I never even noticed the imperfections of my daughter's feet. Interesting though is the fact I never realized for the last 20 years that the second toe is longer. Isn't that the sign of a leader? Well, she definitely fits THAT profile :-)

As for the bunions... well, let's just say it's a good thing I work at home...


Here's How I Let a Friend Know It Didn't Matter To Me

TRose asked about this.  One of my dearest friends has been living in the closet forever, as she feels it's professionally the right thing to do.  About 15 years ago it became apparent to me that something just didn't mesh.  She constantly talked about being in love with "Jonathan," then somehow "Joan" would get thrown in the mix.  For some reason I never got to meet Jonathan or even see a picture of him.  There was always "some reason" why it didn't happen.


One day as we discussed our love lives, I told her that it sounded to me like she'd be better off with Joan than Jonathan.  That was my way of telling her I knew and wouldn't think any less of her.  I simply wanted her to know that she shouldn't have to hide it from me, as we'd been friends for so long already (and still are).  She was relieved.


That's how it worked in my situation.  Maybe something like this can work for you, too. 


Does it really matter which washing detergent you use? sm

i normally buy the cheapest washing detergent.  but it seems like my whites get really dingy.  lately i've been using washing detergent, color safe bleach.  i also use liquid fab. softener.  is it really worth paying more for washing detergent? just wondered what you all do.


 


thanks


I like to eat--doesn't matter if I'm hungry or not.

During high school, I lost about 30 pounds eating only 1 salad a day and Special K cereal for breakfast.  I ran about 5 miles a day and was able to lose 30 pounds in 30 days.  It was a complete turnaround for me.  I gained self-esteem.  I kept the weight off until I went to college.


Of course, in college, I started to revert to my old eating habits and didn't exercise much.  I had settled to a comfortable 180 pounds (which wasn't bad for my height/build) when I got married.  After the birth of my first child, I weighed in at about 220.  When he turned 1, I tried some sort of diet pill (probably had ephedra in it) and lost down to 170.  I felt wonderful.  I kept that off until 3 years later when I had my second child.  I lost some of the baby weight, but not all of it.  Two years later, I had my third child.  I weighed about 230 pounds and really wanted to lose.  I tried Stacker with ephedra and lost like 40 pounds in 6 weeks.  I felt wonderful.  I kept that off for 2 years. 


At that point, I started Effexor and the weight just slowly crept up on me.  I won't blame it entirely on Effexor, but that seemed to be the start of it.  Now, I'm up to 250 pounds - the most I think I've ever weighed and I would kill to see 200 pounds again.  I've been contemplating a few weight loss options and can't seem to decide on one.  I've tried most of the ephedra products, phenteramine prescribed by my doc, Nutri-System (but only for 2 weeks - the food was yuck!).


I'm seriously considering WW but would like to have an appetite suppressant to help me out initially.  I know from past experience that diet pills only work for so long, but I really think that if I could just get in the groove, I'd be okay.  I like to exercise.  I only work about 4 hours a day, so I have the time.  I just can't seem to control what I eat.  I especially love to eat late at night when watching TV.  I can do so good all day long and then 10 o'clock comes and I ruin it. 


My other problem is that I'm not much of a veggie eater.  The only veggies I really like are corn, potatoes, and green beans.  The starchy ones.  I like fruit, but it's not very filling.  I get tired of eating chicken and I'm not much of a fish eater.  I'd really rather eat a cheesesteak most of the time or pizza.  I love junk food - chips, candy bars, nachos, cookies.  I eat when I'm not hungry just for the sheer taste. 


Okay, I know I'm nuts and I probably have some sort of eating disorder, so what I'm really wondering is:  Is there a good appetite suppressant?  I've been checking a few on-line and I can't seem to find a bona fide review by someone who's used the product.  These are the ones I'm considering:  Leptovox, Fenphedra, Proactol.


Anyone try any of these and did you see results?  I know I have to eat healthier and exercise.  I'm okay with that if I could just get my cravings under control. 


I realize this is a private matter, but

is there someone close to the both of you that could be present when you tell him.  Ordinarily, I would recommend meeting him in a public place, but in this case, since it is a financial affair, I wouldn't recommend that.  However, if there is someone you are both close to, perhaps you could have them present (even if only in the other room) while you tell him. 


Another possibility may be to discuss this with your in-laws first.  Again, I wouldn't ordinarily recommend this, but they appear to already be involved in your financial matters since you borrowed the money from them for the car.  Depending on their reaction, perhaps you could all sit down together and they could help you work this out. 


If all else fails, call your attorney and schedule a meeting where he will mediate.  I would not tell this man alone in person.  It doesn't sound like a safe thing to do.


I think those things do matter -- it's context

If it were a teacher calling a 16 or 17-year-old student that, then I would be concerned.  However, as I said, my son's kindergarten teacher calls him that all the time.  She's pushing 60 and he's 6 -- big difference.  She's also had my other 2 children and done the same.  I'm 34 and when I visit the class, I call the kids the same thing, mainly because I can't remember all their names. 


I'd have to guess that if it upsets you, there's probably another reason that it upsets you -- maybe a roving eye or longer-than-you'd-like pats on the back by the teacher?  If you have a bad vibe, you should definitely pursue it!  Maternal instinct is usually right.


It DOES NOT matter! As your brother's WIFE,
still married to him when he died, SHE IS ENTITLED TO HER INHERITANCE.

Do you not understand or do you not WANT to understand, because then you have to give them their money!
Document everything, no matter how trivial

Document everything!  From the past and things leading up to you leaving and what’s going on now. It’s always hard for the children to see this happening.  I’m proud of you for taking the steps to make changes.  It’s easy for a son to treat women with disrespect when they see how a father treated a mother, or for a daughter to believe that it is okay to be abused verbally/emotionally when they see their mother go through that.  You did the right thing to leave.


 


I do not know what state you live in, but in my state when a woman with children goes into a shelter, they are given priority over a waiting list for low-income housing.  There are options out there for you. Apply for food stamps/medical etc until you get your court hearing.   


 


Prayers are with you.  Stay strong and give your kids lots of hugs and kisses.


 


 


 


First off, he CANNOT just kick you out of the house. It does not matter

if your name is on the deed or not, it is marital property, you both own it.  So tell him to take a flying leap that you're not leaving.  If he tries to physically remove you from the house, you call the police and tell them he assaulted you.  You go to the county courthouse and swear out an ex parte emergency order of protection at which time they will issue a temporary restraining order for 15 days and schedule an adult abuse hearing.  During the 15 days, he cannot come near you and HE will have to leave the house.  At the adult abuse hearing, you will tell the judge if you want to proceed with the restraining order and if you do, they will schedule another hearing and extending the emergency order of protection until the next court date and so on.  Eventually, the judge will hear the case and make the temporary order permanent.


In the meantime, you should contact legal aid for legal advice and an attorney.  I would also do as the poster below suggested which is start to get together important paperwork, possessions, etc. and stash them at a friend's place.  Do not get a storage facility or rent anything that will leave a paper trail back to you.  I would also empty out any and all joint accounts and open an account in your name only at another bank, change your direct deposit through work if you have it going into a joint account. 


I know everything above sounds very calculated and cold, but it's cover your butt time.  Men can be cruel and you have to worry about you and your kids (if you have any).  I've been through an ugly divorce and I functioned during my divorce with the full knowledge that every single move I made was to protect and provide for my kids and myself.  Every move my ex made was for himself and himself only. 


I wish you the best of luck.  Be strong and be smart!


Does not really matter why, especially if there are children involved
x
It should not matter who types it - as an MT we are bound
by rules and regulation, HIPPA, etc. If I ended up typing their report I would not tell anyone (not even DH) because that is against rules (maybe they are my own, but if word leaked out that I typed their reports it would be by my own mouth). Besides...I don't think the press can find out the name of the Transcriptionist who types the reports. If so, then it would be because the supervisor gave them your name and then she/he could get in trouble. There are just some things nobody should know, and even though they are Hollywood legends their bodies function the same way ours do and they are no different than Sam, Joe, Judy or Bob when typing a report for them.