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That is hysterical mine is exactly the same, - sm

Posted By: XXX on 2007-08-01
In Reply to: I think we are married to the same man!! - sm

I just commented above that I lie to keep the peace. I too have been thinking about recording him and have even told him that. I mean if one of the kids gets a scratch on their knee he goes nuts, but if one kid puts soap in the others drink because she is upset with her sister, he thinks it is no big deal (what if it had been bleach is what I pointed out to him). He is getting better on the injury thing but if they get the tinest bit hurt from doing anything he usually has a fit; outing are total h-e-l-l lately as his patience is nil these days. Kids are getting to the point of not telling him anything because they don't know what will set him off. I don't disclose much either and work most of the time so I don't have to deal with "issues". A friend of mine called the other night and he hovered the whole time listening; got totally angry because my friend drove by our old house, angry at himself for selling it and moving though we are in such a better and nicer place now. (property values jumped after we sold), so he ranted about that for a couple hours. I just pop on the headphones and work or pretend to work. Pretty sad.


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that is hysterical ! nm
x
You are hysterical! nm
!
Hysterical
Have 2 lab pups. This is so true!
For you younger gals out there. That K-Fed is hysterical! sm

I just read about his party in Chicago (I ran out of work!) and they were GIVING AWAY tickets to his concert last night! He got on stage and with his pants almost to his knees started rapping that he was "single" and if any ladies wanted to be with a pimp! haha! Yeah, what -idiot- would want to be with a guy who has a 2 year old with one woman, and 2 other kids under 2 with another woman (Brittney Spearks) PLUS has another 4 or 5 year old too! What is that - 5 kids?! Hilarious.


And, to boot, he's not making any money with this rap debut and Brittney will pay him 180,000 total in spousal support. Poor guy..


I've just never in my life been embarrassed for someone after reading a story about them! Good night. He was in a VIP room in Chicago letting his "entourage" try on his many gold chains. Isn't that the funniest fricken thing you've ever heard?! Well, he was probably trying to sell them to people so he could pay his child support. Which will be plenty when he's through divorcing.


Yeah, I want to be with a pimp  like that. NOT!


You hit a nerve?...that's hysterical! Surely I did!
x
Oh my gosh, Sandi. You are hysterical! nm
*
Mu hubby and children think it is hysterical when they do it to me
I don't even get an apology.
My SIL thinks it is hysterical when her children
make really loud remarks and start coughing aroung smokers. I think it is totally rude. I don't allow my children to do it cause I personally would never do it. You are so right about the fact that we don't openly criticize others for what we think are bad habits. It is your life, do what you want. Just wanted to share something that was funny, we went to a benefit dance last week for the American Cancer Society and I went outside to use my cell phone. I had to walk through all the smokers, and I laughingly said "Dear God, this is a cancer dance." Everyone laughed so I don't think anyone was offended and it truely was a joke. I don't like to be around cigarette smoke, but I also don't drink in front of certain people, so who am I to say anything?
thank you, I still remember her hysterical post
about her UTI which freaked a lot of MTs out, telling us that she lost gallons of blood into the toilet bowl, causing a lot of compassionate advice from worried MTs. Then she just vanished, telling us a week later that everything was just o.k.'
Now she comes with her 'gas story.'
Crying wolf again?

In the future I will spare my compassion on this forum.
HAHA! LOL! OMG! This is hysterical. I laughed at both, but yours made me cry. nm
nm
That is hysterical. Do the guys who work with your hubby

This is hysterical. Please read these Christmas cards. sm

CHRISTMAS CAROLS FOR THE DISTURBED

* 1.
Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

* 2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

* 3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas

* 4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

* 5. Manic Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and
                     Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and.....


* 6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

* 7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

* 8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe

                                                 I'll Tell You Why

* 9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, H oly oooh look at the Froggy - can I have

                                                        a chocolate?                     Why is France so far away?

* 10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,

Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle,Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells , Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,

 

 

"The Party" with Peter Sellers. None funnier. Not a well known movie, but hysterical. nm
.
Don't know about your God, but mine
my God is more forgiving than that!

She is not doing anyone any harm, so to say she will burn in h*** for celebrating the fun part of Halloween, not evilness, is the whole reason I do not attend church!

I never did it with mine. For one, I would have been
too embarrassed. My mother used to do it, but we have come a long way since then. I find it kind of primitive. I think nothing is wrong with it in your own home, but in public, I really think you should think about it. There are all kinds of weirdos out there and you just don't know what is in their minds. I see nothing wrong with breastfeeding INSIDE YOUR HOME, but there are folks who would get offended by doing it in public. I would not be offended, but really...I think you could put some of that breast milk in a bottle before you go out.
Mine is up

and FAKE -- Me and my fam are all allergic!


Have red/white/blue/silver these.  Looks awesome.  Have lights up outside too!!!!


HAPPY HOLIDAYS!



Mine would be...
Laxatives
Laytex gloves
a metal detector

mine too
have to light a fire under his butt in an attempt to get him out of the house.
Mine did nothing at all, at least he went out and tried - sm
more than my DH did, though mine did ask me what I wanted, I told him, he told me to go buy it. This is typical for him. He used to get me beautiful jewelry for b-day, Christmas, annivarsary, that lasted for about 2 years or so, then it has been buy yourself what you want. I do not get bent (what is the point) though a little effort on his part would be nice. He did surprise me on our 10-year anniversary though this year, got me a beautiful opal necklace. As for the kids, my one daughter gave me 2 things, my other nothing, but she gives me wonderful drawings and such all the time, she just has a selfish streak I guess and does not think of others only herself. I just talked to her about this, maybe in the future she will remember our little talk and some good will come from it. My DH needs to learn somehow to have the kids get things for mom on special occasions, yours does too it seems. My neighbor has the same problem with her husband. Basically they are lazy people. He does none of the shopping, gift wrapping, packing to leave (except for his stuff of course), etc. He did buy 1 or 2 gifts, which I of course wrapped. This will probably never change until the kids are gone and he is an old man. I have seen it happen but not until grandchildren are on the scene and these men become model husbands for some reason, whether it is out of boredom or fear of the wife finally saying "I'm out of here, go fend for yourself", or they get struck my lightening, who knows, but beating yourself up about it is not the answer. If you are truly unhappy, get out, or kick him out. But if this is his "flaw" then either live with it, and buy yourself what you want each year or do something about it. It is your call how you deal with it.
mine went away
I had one on my nose for about a year and all of a sudden it just vanished and has never come back. It always bothered me because it was so ugly, but it never hurt and I didn't have to pay to zap it.
Two of mine have had and he will run
fever if he does not drink or eat the popsickles and get sicker. You probably know but you can cool him down with tepid water, try that. You will really have to keep up with you have to drink or eat cool, cold so he will not run that fever.
Yes, mine are
never and I mean never tempt fate. i could never say I was sick or someone else sick say if I wanted to be off from work, no, no, might come true. I have to knock on wood when I say something that is an iffy thing, don’t want to jink.
LOL, I had mine do just that
I gave him a testing tape. It took him hours to get through a page, typing with two fingers, with everything lumped together in one big paragraph, headings and all. Not to mention all the mistakes. lol He now says he has no idea how I do this. I told him I don't know either. : )
LOL! Mine does that too!
And I love how they can never puke/cough up hairballs on the tile, they always have to find a carpeted area (which stains). They can be in the middle of the tile kitchen and find the only rug!
Mine do that too! LOL!
I have tiles in my kitchen, bathroom, and laundry room, yet they decide to leave me presents in the living room or bedrooms where it is carpeted! I own a steam cleaner just for that purpose! LOL!
ok, here's mine...
Awesome: Ellen Degeneres (sp?)

Lame: Oprah
Mine is like that too. (sm)
I don't know why they so strongly believe that aggressive driving is good driving. DH always wants to drive or else he goes nuts, but when I occasionally end up being the driver, he needs to keep quiet so I can concentrate. Just because his BP is through the roof shouldn't mean mine has to be. Lately even when I'm the passenger I don't put up with it. As he starts up, complaining about traffic the moment we've pulled out of the driveway, I calmly remind him he'll live through it. He is starting to realize what a pain he is in the car.
Mine did this ONCE -
We were first married and actually WERE, uh, busy...You never saw someone hit the door running so fast. It never happened again. However, if I were you I would definitely lock my door and put up a sign asking everyone to please knock. It is YOUR house.
Here's how I got out of mine...
I called the cell phone company, said I was trying to cancel but got disconnected and had to call back.  When the rep said I had to pay termination on both phones I said the previous rep said I only had to be for 1 phone disconnect fee.  After going back and forth a little bit, the rep caved and only charged me for 1 disconnect fee.  Worth a try.  Good luck.
Mine
used to go on "business trips" and would never check in as well and came up with a world of reasons why. He was seeing other women. That also played a role in lowering my self-esteem, but now I look back and actually feel sorry for him. He's alone and will never have the respect or relationship I have with our children. It's just pitiful, but he made his bed.

I hope you have family you can talk to and get support from. If you need to email me, please feel free. I just know how you feel and I hurt for you right now, but I promise you, it'll all be okay.
Here are mine...sm
Knitting, crochet, cross stitch are my favorites, but the projects keep piling up in a corner because there is no time, and too tired to get through even 5 pages of a book at bedtime.  Wish I had an adventure-filled life to blame it on. 
I got mine a GPS....sm
he gets lost VERY easily so I figured he'd love it.
mine are like that too.
The last time one of them was home he straightened out one my cupboards and they like to cook with me and play board or card games.
That is exactly how I fix mine, YUM! (nm)
x
First mine said he was gay

He deliberately married me for a "front" (he was in the military) and didn't bother to tell me he was gay until we'd been married 6 months.  After years of confusion, he ended up having a sex change after marrying a second woman and having a child with her.


If you're lucky, he's just curious.  But you really need to get the truth out of him, and be prepared for the worst.  If he's really confused about his sexuality it may take him years to figure out who he "is" and what he really wants, so it may be difficult for him to tell you the truth because he might be in denial about it himself.


Mine was only 10 or 11, but she had - sm
aggressive, metastatic breast cancer that spread to her lungs. Vet said I would "know" when to have her PTS.

I knew when she didn't want to do anything but sit on the couch and stare off into space. No longer wanted food or attention, just occasional water, and kind of a blank stare. Was also out of breath all the time. So I had a long talk with her about it, and she just seemed to be saying, "Do it - I'm ready."
Well here's mine (sm)
I can lean on the slacker side sometimes too so here is what I do: get my tea- start half an hour early - read any interesting news on Yahoo, check and respond to emails, look at MTstars ;-) - just get that out of the way. Through the day I tell myself I can't switch over and check email or anything until I have done a certain number of minutes, etc., which earns me an email break. I also have motivational music on my computer - like The Blur's Woohoo! song that I play in between when I am doing things that don't require listening, like sending my work and things like that.
here's mine
Life is good, I am SO blessed!
Mine is on my arm
I want a new one on my back but i'm afraid to get it done here; my one and only was done in Austin, Texas. Mine's pretty big, it takes up almost my entire upper arm.
yes, I got mine on 05/02
I was under the assumption that married people get 1200. Not true. We only got 600. The VA took 167.00 of it, so that left us with 433. Not exactly what I was expecting, but will come in handy.
I'd rather be where you are but here's mine:
http://www.arkansas.com/
Mine does this too
And I am in my 20s. I have them sometimes many times a day for a week straight or so. I am going to my cardiologist again soon but I assume it is nothing to worry about because they dont seem worried. I have a feeling they will do a Holter or something, but it is so hard to catch them because it seems it essentially just does it when it feels like it.
Mine is not like that but just as bad
After 25 years of being together he still has most of his stuff. He doesn't touch my stuff and I don't touch his. It is so hard to get him out of the mindset of keeping everything. He says there is a lot he wants to get rid of but the actuality of doing it? He can't bring himself to part with it even though he says he needs to lighten up.
Mine is....
"hisself" instead of himself. Drives me crazy.
Here goes mine..
ax instead of ask,

beedroom instead of bedroom (I think that's an Australian thing) or for that matter, betroom instead of bedroom

Daytawn instead of Dayton (& from residents too!)

The use of the f-word & the s-word in every other sentence... (if not every sentence)

The over-use of the word "basically" As in starting every other sentence, "Well, basically it's...."
Mine are:

warsh for wash (a common Hoosier-ism, I guess, but I still hate it)


liberry for library


chimbly for chimney


and my mother-in-law pronounces crayons "crins"


Mine is 10 now
and of course he doesn't remember this anymore but my hubs asked him the other day if he wanted a hangaburger. He just thought his dad was weird. LOL Kids are so much fun.
Here's mine....see pic
I usually have a calico kitten sleeping on my notebook, but I'm not working this afternoon, so not sure where she is.
mine are not that age yet
thought about what i would do should that happen... i did it when i was young and i made some very poor choices during the time i smoked. though that's not happened yet, should it happen, i believe i would try to be with my kids as much as i possibly could. i would take them to school, i would pick them up, if they have a school function, guess what? mom's going too.

you know, when i was younger and did that, my parents DID have a clue... they may have wanted to act all naive but they KNEW.. and as ticked off at them as i would have been had they ever confronted me about it, i look back and truly wish they had and maybe shown some tough love. i think your son's father may be going overboard with wanting to kick him out.

the most important thing is, regardless of how you decide to deal with this, is to let him know how much you love him. bottom line is, if you didn't love him, you wouldn't care what he does.

Some of mine are.............sm
The Christmas Shows with Rob Lowe.

Santa and Pete with Hume Cronyn.

The Angel Doll with Keith Carradine.

The Santa Clause with Tim Allen

And my all-time favorite is It's a Wonderful Life with Jimmy Stewart.




Here is mine...sm
It is Souper easy (I know, groan!).  Chicken, beef or veggie stock (not broth), frozen veggies depending on mood, quite a bit of garlic and onion, frozen tortellini, and maybe some bits of meat (usually not), and herbs depending on the other ingredients being used.  Amount depends on how many people are being fed.  This is good for using up leftover veggies, chicken and beef, too.